what would YOU do?

Why are so many people acting like having him prepare food he is eating would be cruel and unusual punishment? This kid probably only has a few more years at home and learning to cook would be a practical skill, as well as saving his mother some hassle!

Exactly!

1) He can make his own.
2) It's a simple question of common courtesy - we should all teach our children to respect other people's things. If something is mine, you ask permission before you gobble it down. When he's 18, moves out, and as a roommate, he will need to know about this stuff. 14 is plenty old to make your own food and respect other's property.

I am surely not hiding food in my own house. The "people" I'm supposed to be raising (you know, teaching morals and things like that) can learn to keep their hands off of it. I make the money, I pay for the groceries, I will buy you things that you like, and I won't eat it, so I ask for the same respect in return. And if you want it, just ASK.

Oh and you are not being LAZY either!!! Far from it.

Nobody is entitled to eat everything in the house unless they contribute to providing it all. A parent's duty is to provide nutritious food to sustain life and health. Treats are optional whether it be your special chocolate or crappy pudding cups.

why are you buying junk food like pudding cups?

why are you buying junk food like pudding cups?

How do you know she's buying junk? Are sugar free, fat free pudding cups not an option?

I find some of these repsonses unbelievable. The mindset that he should be able to have whatever he wants 'cause he's a special little snowflake is obviously not the approach lovely OP has taken, and rightfully so (that was not a dig at your son--I am sure he is lovely! :flowerforyou:) At 14 I was cooking my own stuff. If mom made something I didn't like, I made my own dinner. Most people I know my age are bratty and think the world owes them something, most of them are like that because they were allowed to do whatever, whenever, and their parents catered to their every whim. No one teaches their kids to be self-sufficient anymore :grumble:

My son is 12 and he always tries to get me to make him breakfast. My response....your legs arent broken and your hands are empty lol He likes to eat dinner with us as well so he gets to cook one of the veggies or he can eat top ramen lol Sounds harsh but he needs to learn now! I got so fat I thought I could keel over any minute so there is no time to baby them into adulthood lol He now does his own laundry as well I dont mention my daughter who is 15 because she had no issues getting right in there lol He eats like a mad man so in a way I use it to my advantage. He is allowed to eat junk but only after something healthy has been consumed first half the time he never makes it to the junk (thats the whole point) But there is always spurts where it seems he is eating non stop. I do say no alot when he asks for junk but auto yes to fruit or anything healthy limitless. Yes my kids ask for food they are not allowed to be in the kitchen,fridge etc without permission. I know I will get alot of BS comments but they are the most respectful kids and always ask before they do anything because they know their actions have consequences and when it comes to that it is VERY bad lol Maybe I shouldnt comment on this subject since it isnt an issue for me but I just think there is a better way to deal with it than having to hide stuff. I have never had to hide anything from the children, old man yes, lol but thats a whole diff subject lol

When I was growing up in my parents house, my Mother had serious health problems which she improved by eating healthier foods, but just like with the treat that you made yourself, a lot of these foods were very expensive. She was honest with us and told us that it was just too expensive to feed us all on the healthier food and we understood that we couldn't eat her food and we learned to eat separate meals.

I would try to see if there's a way to make it healthier AND affordable, then let your son have some too. But if there's no way to make a cheaper alternative I would just be honest with him and tell him he needs to eat his own treats and leave yours for you. He's old enough that he should be able to understand if you just talk to him about it.

He's 14....He's allowed to eat whatever he wants (within reason) and you are to provide it for him. If you don't want him to have your "chocolate" (assuming you can call it that) then don't let him know you have it....Hide it.....if he knows where it is/finds it it's fair game.

That makes it sound like as long as he finds it, its okay for him to have it. I hope you have a really good hiding place for your alcohol, wallet/purse, guns, items of intimacy, etc. etc. Yes, you are required to provide him with food to nourish his body, but you are not required to provide, sodas, chips, candy, donuts...

good idea to make a portion for him. It would be selfish to keep healthy stuff from your kid, and then let him eat junk like a pudding cup or whatever. And yes, my kids are more important than any chocolate too.

I think you're being entirely reasonable. He may enjoy your treat, but he certainly doesn't appreciate it. He'd get just as much satisfaction from eating any other chocolate treat. Boys at that age are pretty much oblivious, and their mouths are on autopilot.

I buy myself relatively pricey thin crust mini pizza crusts that are for my use ONLY. My husband and son can have frozen pizza, homemade dough pizza, or French bread pizzas.

Because I hate them and want them to suffer, duh. :huh: