Why are people not happy for you when you lose weight??

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24

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  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
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    Because most people want to be where you are, but they don't want to have to do what you did and it makes them bitter. CONGRATS on the weight loss :)
  • ahfahm
    ahfahm Posts: 4
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    Congrats on your weight loss and keep it up! Always remember it is what you do on a positive spin with others actions that make you the better person for the greater good. Best of luck and congrats again. :)
  • Mavrick_RN
    Mavrick_RN Posts: 439 Member
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    Most people are so caught up in whats going on in their life that they don't care/notice whats going on with others.

    Obviously my female twin at half my age is alive and well.
  • tatd_820
    tatd_820 Posts: 573 Member
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    And...congrats on you losses! Awesome and great work!!!
  • kbornman21
    kbornman21 Posts: 26 Member
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    I feel you on this question. I actually got dumped a few weeks after beginning to lose weight and he's now beginning to try and come back around now that I'm down almost 40lbs. Screw him, he can sulk in guilt/shame and eat his feelings while I sit here and take the high road! Don't let anyone bring you down!
  • jerman01
    jerman01 Posts: 34 Member
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    People seem to hate it when someone suceeds. I have people telling me that I am losing too much and I exercise too much. Eat something. A little won't hurt.

    Oh well, 70 lbs lost and I feel great.

    Don't stress over it. They need to wake up and give you a big congrats.
  • kslrichard
    kslrichard Posts: 2
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    I have a friend who was a total hottie when she got married. Then she had two kids and ended up weighing over 300 pounds. Her husband stayed the same weight the whole time. She tried everything to loose weight and couldn't, he kept sabotaging her, "let's go to dinner, let's get a pizza, let's have drinks...." Finally, she had gastro bypass and went down to 105 lbs. She looks awesome! She had lots of energy, she got a promotion at work, then a new job, then a divorce. He couldn't handle it. He needed to be the big fish. Go figure. Some people are just not happy with themselves. What is the saying, "misery loves company". But when you've decided to not be miserable anymore, you need to find some new company. Keep up the good work, and don't let anyone bring you down to their level. With or without your current friends, YOU deserve to be happy and healthy.
  • boatsie77
    boatsie77 Posts: 480 Member
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    ..Im stressing over this and not once have they ever said congrats to me...

    ...why are you allowing yourself to stress out over such a thing?
  • carlysuzanne85
    carlysuzanne85 Posts: 204 Member
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    Some people are more self centered than others, and cannot get over their own negativity if someone is achieving their goals quicker than them. There are many reasons why people act the way they do, though. Could be guilt, could be resentment, some people just don't keep many people in their radar. Whatever the reason, just keep staying positive to yourself and to them if you care about them. :flowerforyou:

    Agreed with this.

    Also, my best friend and I are both on a weight loss/developing a healthy lifestyle journey and we both go through our really good times and both go through our struggles, but even if one of us is struggling, we share and celebrate the other one's scale and non-scale victories with them. She's at fifty pounds lost and I am so proud of her. I hope you can find some support like that :) Not everyone is negative and jealous! And if your real life friends aren't supportive, you know MFP-ers will celebrate your successes with you!
  • xMonroeMisfit
    xMonroeMisfit Posts: 411 Member
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    A variety of reasons.

    Maybe they feel like you think you know it all.
    Maybe they feel like you're shoving it in their face or think you're better than them.
    Maybe they already know what they need to do and are not there mentally/emotionally to make the change
    Maybe they're jealous
    Maybe they think you're conceited now and don't want to blow up your head more.
    Maybe they feel awkward acknowledging the fact that you even had a lot of weight to lose
    Maybe they feel congratulating you would make them feel worse/lazy/etc
    Maybe theyre not good at complimenting people.
  • Storey621
    Storey621 Posts: 82 Member
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    Good for you for losing the weght! I just agree with everyone before me that has replied. People just don't realize the hard work behind it or they are struggling themselves. There's many reasons. But like I said, Good for you for losing 66 pounds! That's an awesome thing to do! Keep going to remember you're not losing it for anyone else but yourself.
  • SamDanielleB
    SamDanielleB Posts: 71
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    Pure envy. I can't tell you how many times people just shrug off the fact that I've lost 20 pounds and offer me some dessert. Do they not even understand the concept? I feel like some people are just out to sabotage me...:indifferent:

    ^^^THIS. Because I am already petite (5'2'', 130lbs), people scoff if I ever mention that I count calories or use MFP. They ask why I work out, like I have to justify it, and I can't tell them "No, I'll have to pass on that 400 cal cookie you're offering me, because it doesn't fit into my day" because they get offended that I think I still have any weight to lose, and they don't understand the idea of PREVENTATIVE MAINTENANCE on my body, and avoiding an obesity problem by acting now. Instead, they take it as a personal insult when that's the last thing I intend.
  • Tannedtiffers
    Tannedtiffers Posts: 558 Member
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    Envy and bitterness over the fact they don't have any willpower to make the commitment themselves.

    Great job on your loss!
  • theCarlton
    theCarlton Posts: 1,344 Member
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    Because a lot of people are generally not happy anyway. Your success does nothing to affect their happiness and, likely, only reminds them of their own shortcomings.

    You don't need other people's validation. Impressing yourself is always enough.
  • hedgiie
    hedgiie Posts: 1,245 Member
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    i'm just guessing here, but maybe it's because it's a sense of losing something..
  • marlysgirl
    marlysgirl Posts: 16 Member
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    Its not only weight loss, I've come across it in other success..... awesome job, buying a house, getting married, etc.

    I'm not sure if its jealously or just surprise.... I have found they come around eventually.
  • Maris_Swan
    Maris_Swan Posts: 197 Member
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    Jealousy. Oh well, too bad.
  • nekoxvampyx
    nekoxvampyx Posts: 163
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    it means they are jealous when they are not happy. before i joined MFP i lost over 70 pounds and i would have " friends" tell me " OMG EAT A BURGER UR ANOREXIC or OMG EAT HUMAN FOOD NOT RABBIT FOOD..etc..and the list went on..but it just came down to them being jealous . haters gonna hate. keep ur chin up :)
  • Alidecker
    Alidecker Posts: 1,262 Member
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    I have been lucky to have support from the close friends and family. The main people that don't say anything nice about the weight lose are the ones that need to change their lifestyle also and sadly the ones that make the rude comments are the ones that were smaller than me and are not anymore. I am sure it helped them feel better about themselves when there was a friend in the crowd that was bigger than them. I shake it off and keep going on my own journey. THe comments that bother me a little are they, you work out too much. I actually enjoy working out and like how I feel when I work out. I like have a habit that is good for me instead of bad.
  • PinkyMouse
    PinkyMouse Posts: 37 Member
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    !!!!!!!!! CONGRATULATIONS JUDY !!!!!!!!!!

    some people are envious, frustrated about their own situation and some are just not caring persons.... They just don't know how to make compliments. For you it is important to support the others and notice their evolution but not everyone is like you....
    If it makes you sad, try to surround you with people who take care of you and are supportive for you !

    But I am pretty sure that you are stronger than what they say or don't say !

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