What do you think?

VeeBethTris
VeeBethTris Posts: 301 Member
in Motivation and Support
This topic is so unrelated to weight loss but I prefer this community to Facebook so here goes.

I have a dear friend from HS who lives in NC , 52 years of age, single, recently diagnosed with stomach cancer, stage 4. He is currently undergoing chemo and has 4 more rounds left. They give him 1-2 years if the chemo can't put him in remission. He's been married but he is a widower with 2 step children, one who is close to him, one who isn't. His stepson does have young children so isn't around very much. His parents are both deceased, his siblings live within an hour but they aren't the most supportive. Basically he lives a solitary existence and since he is now very ill and unable to work, it has become more so. He did finally get approved for disability but still living a very frugal lifestyle. He doesn't have internet access so no Facebook support, his cable got cut off last week and he doesn't expect to be able to get it cut back on till May, and is getting bored at home. Him and I and a few of his closer friends from HS text him and that is the extent of his communication with the outside world. I have offered to visit but I am respecting his privacy when he asked me to wait till he finishes his chemo treatments. He is bored and looking to reread books/movies he has already read/watched over and over.

OK having said all that what I have done is text another friend and suggest she send him some DVD's as he is watching movies most of the time. He is an avid sci fi reader and his favorite author is Stephen King. I am going to the used book store in town after work to purchase some old works to send him some.

Would it be too much to post something on Facebook or here asking for people to send me used books/DVD's for him or to send to him directly? I am not looking for money or anything new. Just trying to help out a friend through a rough time in his life and he won't accept money from anyone.

Would this seem like charity to you? Any ideas? He has 4 more rounds of chemo and that will take 4 months he said so he will be at this awhile.

Replies

  • charlesnapolitano
    charlesnapolitano Posts: 302 Member
    I think it would be awesome of you to post it on FB and have everyone help. I am sure he would love to get some books and dvds to watch while being at help. Your such a sweetheart!
  • SherryR1971
    SherryR1971 Posts: 1,170 Member
    I have a ton of Stephen King I would LOVE to get rid of, I was going to take them to the Goodwill....they are hardbacks, though-maybe kind of bulky to mail...most of my DVD's are romcom and tv shows, not much sci-fi....let me know what you think we can work out!
  • KenosFeoh
    KenosFeoh Posts: 1,837 Member
    It depends on what type he is. I would hate it and consider it a betrayal if somebody ran an ad on Facebook about me.
  • mfish60
    mfish60 Posts: 1
    Might what to find out what he has already so not to send him some of the same things. Let me know I am city clerk for two towns with libraries. I can keep my eye out for those kind of books or any Scifi's.
  • VeeBethTris
    VeeBethTris Posts: 301 Member
    I have a ton of Stephen King I would LOVE to get rid of, I was going to take them to the Goodwill....they are hardbacks, though-maybe kind of bulky to mail...most of my DVD's are romcom and tv shows, not much sci-fi....let me know what you think we can work out!

    Well i am hoping to one big bulk shipping so maybe it won't cost too much. Are you going to your mom's in Appomattox anytime soon? (or someone lives in Appo right?). Maybe we can meet up and I can ship out stuff that you have and stuff I can get from the book store. Can you email me a list of what you have? that way I don't duplicate it or maybe I can take the hardcover to the bookstore and trade the for paperback. Tv show stuff would be good and anything you got DVD wise can't hurt. You know when you are sick you will watch anything. Let me know. Thanks so much Sherry :)

    Charles, thanks :) I try. Just trying to pay it forward as I am so blessed to have been helped in my life.
  • VeeBethTris
    VeeBethTris Posts: 301 Member
    It depends on what type he is. I would hate it and consider it a betrayal if somebody ran an ad on Facebook about me.

    This wouldn't be in a public Facebook thing, just in a private group message with fellow high school friends. But thanks for the input. That's why I put it out there.
  • BrennLinn
    BrennLinn Posts: 178 Member
    I think what your doing is extremely generous and you are an all over awesome person! That being said I think it really just depends on how he is and if he can accept books and movies or if he lets his pride takeover and doesn't want help from anyone.
  • tisamckim
    tisamckim Posts: 3
    I think what might be an easier and more timely help for him is the library. They all have TONS of books on tape, movies and of course, books for him. If he is unable to go to the library, he should call them and explain that he is a shut-in due to illness and would like some support. There are groups that deliver and the library will know if there are groups he could call, if they don't do it themselves.

    If he is a Veteran, he could also call the Veteran's administration and see what support they could offer him in his area. In highly populated military areas, there are tons of volunteer groups that support them now.

    Just some ideas. I will pray for your friend.
  • VeeBethTris
    VeeBethTris Posts: 301 Member
    I think what might be an easier and more timely help for him is the library. They all have TONS of books on tape, movies and of course, books for him. If he is unable to go to the library, he should call them and explain that he is a shut-in due to illness and would like some support. There are groups that deliver and the library will know if there are groups he could call, if they don't do it themselves.

    If he is a Veteran, he could also call the Veteran's administration and see what support they could offer him in his area. In highly populated military areas, there are tons of volunteer groups that support them now.

    Just some ideas. I will pray for your friend.

    Thank you for the input but a)he isn't a veteran and b)he lives in a very small town. I have already reached out to the local library and they will try to see what they can do but it is almost 20 minutes away. Thank you very much for your prayers.
  • charlesnapolitano
    charlesnapolitano Posts: 302 Member
    i would like to help out in someway with either dvds or books. Just message me when you can and I will send some books and some dvds thanks

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