why do guys hate being picked-up?
Question is both literal and figurative.
I just updated my profile pic and thought about the story behind the pic. Only reason I have the pic is because my brother was in a great mood on his wedding day. He is 6'3" and was about 170-180 lbs at the time.
I used to surprise pick up my husband the first year we were married, but he hated it... eventually convinced me to stop.
In training for ski patrol a couple years ago, we had to prove we could lift a person in a team of four, three, two and on our own. I managed to drag lift a 200 lb guy across the room. He hated it, got razed by the fellow male students.
When I was single, I had no problem asking a guy out. Sometimes successful, sometimes got shot down (guys really, really need to learn how to do a gracious turndown).
So tell me, why do you guys hate being picked-up?
I just updated my profile pic and thought about the story behind the pic. Only reason I have the pic is because my brother was in a great mood on his wedding day. He is 6'3" and was about 170-180 lbs at the time.
I used to surprise pick up my husband the first year we were married, but he hated it... eventually convinced me to stop.
In training for ski patrol a couple years ago, we had to prove we could lift a person in a team of four, three, two and on our own. I managed to drag lift a 200 lb guy across the room. He hated it, got razed by the fellow male students.
When I was single, I had no problem asking a guy out. Sometimes successful, sometimes got shot down (guys really, really need to learn how to do a gracious turndown).
So tell me, why do you guys hate being picked-up?
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Replies
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ROFLMAO! That is the best profile pic evah!0
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Thanks, I was going through old pics for motivation and came across it. made me laugh too...0
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I don't think male culture of the past few decades has allowed for this type of encounter as a general rule.
The "rules" are changing.
Surprise! Women can be strong, women can be aggressive, women are not dainty things, etc, etc, etc.
Not sure the average man who grew up in the 20th century knows how to deal with that.
My sister is on par with my own level of strength (She is a NCAA division I athlete, thus she is ridiculously strong for a woman, considering her size), faster, and a lot smarter than me.
In the Bahamas, where I originate from, 'Sweethearting' is apart of the post-colonial male dominated cheating culture. There is a sense that a man, is not a REAL HE-MAN unless he has multiple women (wife, mistresses, etc)
But there, women are generally regarded as supposed to be frilly, dainty, almost reluctant creatures in the ways of carnal knowledge. It's complete bunk, but that's what the men I recall from my youth there espoused.
Now that's changing in some parts of the world... nothing wrong with that, but men, from the past century are probably just unprepared for it.0 -
I've got control issues and don't like people physically picking me up even as a woman. Maybe that's why guys hate it. IDK....
I also only don't like creepy guys trying to pick me up...period. I'm not afraid to tell them to get the hell away either if creepy....is that an ungracious turndown??? If so, then I don't want to be gracious until they aren't creepy.0 -
You have to ASK this question? I would think it would be obvious to everyone. A girl physically picking up a guy, makes him feel like a wuss! Now if a hot chick picks him up in a bar, that's a whole different scenario!0
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Its called testosterone. All goes back to the caveman we haven't evolved0
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You have to ASK this question? I would think it would be obvious to everyone. A girl physically picking up a guy, makes him feel like a wuss! Now if a hot chick picks him up in a bar, that's a whole different scenario!
Why did you feel the need to pick up your husband?? That seems very bizarre to me. Just go around surprise picking people up. Attention grab? ADD? If someone, even my BF surprise picked me up I'd freak out. Doesn't seem like something people would enjoy, as it's not very comfortable to have someone haul you over their shoulder.0 -
Sunday is a slllllllloooooooooowwwwww night on the forums. Apparently.0
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I've got control issues and don't like people physically picking me up even as a woman. Maybe that's why guys hate it. IDK....
I also only don't like creepy guys trying to pick me up...period. I'm not afraid to tell them to get the hell away either if creepy....is that an ungracious turndown??? If so, then I don't want to be gracious until they aren't creepy.
I also like being in control, probably why I liked asking men out rather than waiting. I like to think I wasn't creepy about it... simply ask them point blank (after finding out if they were seeing someone or not)
I also don't like being picked up (literally) but that has to do with a guy picking me up, running away with me while I'm laughing and then sexually assaulting me when he got me away from the group.0 -
Torture rack...0
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I've got control issues and don't like people physically picking me up even as a woman. Maybe that's why guys hate it. IDK....
I also only don't like creepy guys trying to pick me up...period. I'm not afraid to tell them to get the hell away either if creepy....is that an ungracious turndown??? If so, then I don't want to be gracious until they aren't creepy.
I also like being in control, probably why I liked asking men out rather than waiting. I like to think I wasn't creepy about it... simply ask them point blank (after finding out if they were seeing someone or not)
I also don't like being picked up (literally) but that has to do with a guy picking me up, running away with me while I'm laughing and then sexually assaulting me when he got me away from the group.
^^^^^we must know the same guy.0 -
You have to ASK this question? I would think it would be obvious to everyone. A girl physically picking up a guy, makes him feel like a wuss! Now if a hot chick picks him up in a bar, that's a whole different scenario!
Why did you feel the need to pick up your husband?? That seems very bizarre to me. Just go around surprise picking people up. Attention grab? ADD? If someone, even my BF surprise picked me up I'd freak out. Doesn't seem like something people would enjoy, as it's not very comfortable to have someone haul you over their shoulder.
How I was raised? My father and brothers took great joy in picking me up and spinning me til I was sick when I was young.
With my husband, I thought it was all just in good fun... hug squeeze lift0 -
Being picked up literally immediately flashes pictures of us both crashing into the ground. Hard. The average man can't hoist 180+lbs up and walk with it, much less the average woman. The fact that you can isn't something that's going to register.
As far as figuratively...doesn't bother me in the least. Unless I'm not interested, at which point I become very uncomfortable. As a man I've been taught to try to accomodate women, to respect them, and absolutely to consider their feelings well before my own.
Makes for a bit of awkwardness for sure.0 -
Its called testosterone. All goes back to the caveman we haven't evolved
but you would think that it would be handy to have a partner who could pick you up and run when you were injured? think of the coming zombie attacks...0 -
Its called testosterone. All goes back to the caveman we haven't evolved
Pull my hair and drag me back to your cave please and thank you.0 -
It's an instinctive response - - being off of the ground means I can't use any leverage or control my spatial orientation, my mass, or my inertia, which means that I can't control my body. That makes me want to physically injure the person in a brutal way, until I'm back in control of my body. If it's someone I care about picking me up, I don't like being put in the position of wanting to seriously hurt them, so I would ask that they refrain.0
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It's an instinctive response - - being off of the ground means I can't use any leverage or control my spatial orientation, my mass, or my inertia, which means that I can't control my body. That makes me want to physically injure the person in a brutal way, until I'm back in control of my body. If it's someone I care about picking me up, I don't like being put in the position of wanting to seriously hurt them, so I would ask that they refrain.
He gets it.Its called testosterone. All goes back to the caveman we haven't evolved
Pull my hair and drag me back to your cave please and thank you.
If you insist...0 -
I've got control issues and don't like people physically picking me up even as a woman. Maybe that's why guys hate it. IDK....
I also only don't like creepy guys trying to pick me up...period. I'm not afraid to tell them to get the hell away either if creepy....is that an ungracious turndown??? If so, then I don't want to be gracious until they aren't creepy.
I also like being in control, probably why I liked asking men out rather than waiting. I like to think I wasn't creepy about it... simply ask them point blank (after finding out if they were seeing someone or not)
I also don't like being picked up (literally) but that has to do with a guy picking me up, running away with me while I'm laughing and then sexually assaulting me when he got me away from the group.
^^^^^we must know the same guy.
all I can say is I'm sorry you went through the same. definitely destroyed my confidence in being able to control a situation for a while.0 -
It's an instinctive response - - being off of the ground means I can't use any leverage or control my spatial orientation, my mass, or my inertia, which means that I can't control my body. That makes me want to physically injure the person in a brutal way, until I'm back in control of my body. If it's someone I care about picking me up, I don't like being put in the position of wanting to seriously hurt them, so I would ask that they refrain.
He gets it.Its called testosterone. All goes back to the caveman we haven't evolved
Pull my hair and drag me back to your cave please and thank you.
If you insist...
double swoon0 -
It's an instinctive response - - being off of the ground means I can't use any leverage or control my spatial orientation, my mass, or my inertia, which means that I can't control my body. That makes me want to physically injure the person in a brutal way, until I'm back in control of my body. If it's someone I care about picking me up, I don't like being put in the position of wanting to seriously hurt them, so I would ask that they refrain.
yeah, I get that...
guess i was thinking that if it was a relationship of trust, then it could just be treated as a bit of fun... sort of the way I was expected to take it all in fun when my brothers or boyfriend did it to me0 -
It's an instinctive response - - being off of the ground means I can't use any leverage or control my spatial orientation, my mass, or my inertia, which means that I can't control my body. That makes me want to physically injure the person in a brutal way, until I'm back in control of my body. If it's someone I care about picking me up, I don't like being put in the position of wanting to seriously hurt them, so I would ask that they refrain.
He gets it.Its called testosterone. All goes back to the caveman we haven't evolved
Pull my hair and drag me back to your cave please and thank you.
If you insist...
double swoon
Love you miss J
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Torture rack...
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It's an instinctive response - - being off of the ground means I can't use any leverage or control my spatial orientation, my mass, or my inertia, which means that I can't control my body. That makes me want to physically injure the person in a brutal way, until I'm back in control of my body. If it's someone I care about picking me up, I don't like being put in the position of wanting to seriously hurt them, so I would ask that they refrain.
yeah, I get that...
guess i was thinking that if it was a relationship of trust, then it could just be treated as a bit of fun... sort of the way I was expected to take it all in fun when my brothers or boyfriend did it to me
It isn't about trust. If they don't like it, any amount of trust doesn't change that.0 -
I don't think male culture of the past few decades has allowed for this type of encounter as a general rule.
The "rules" are changing.
Surprise! Women can be strong, women can be aggressive, women are not dainty things, etc, etc, etc.
Not sure the average man who grew up in the 20th century knows how to deal with that.
My sister is on par with my own level of strength (She is a NCAA division I athlete, thus she is ridiculously strong for a woman, considering her size), faster, and a lot smarter than me.
In the Bahamas, where I originate from, 'Sweethearting' is apart of the post-colonial male dominated cheating culture. There is a sense that a man, is not a REAL HE-MAN unless he has multiple women (wife, mistresses, etc)
But there, women are generally regarded as supposed to be frilly, dainty, almost reluctant creatures in the ways of carnal knowledge. It's complete bunk, but that's what the men I recall from my youth there espoused.
Now that's changing in some parts of the world... nothing wrong with that, but men, from the past century are probably just unprepared for it.
I gave a bit of thought to responding to your post.
Congratulations to your sister! sounds like she may have had an uphill battle to get where she is now.
I was also raised in a fairly conservative small town environment... the women could only show strength when necessary, otherwise had to pretend frailty..
I like to experiment with/challenge pre-conceived notions, showing physical strength is one of the ways I do this0 -
It's an instinctive response - - being off of the ground means I can't use any leverage or control my spatial orientation, my mass, or my inertia, which means that I can't control my body. That makes me want to physically injure the person in a brutal way, until I'm back in control of my body. If it's someone I care about picking me up, I don't like being put in the position of wanting to seriously hurt them, so I would ask that they refrain.
yeah, I get that...
guess i was thinking that if it was a relationship of trust, then it could just be treated as a bit of fun... sort of the way I was expected to take it all in fun when my brothers or boyfriend did it to me
It isn't about trust. If they don't like it, any amount of trust doesn't change that.
but checkout football or soccer, guys are aways picking up other guys. I think this actually has more to do with me being a female showing strength (domination?) over a male0 -
It's an instinctive response - - being off of the ground means I can't use any leverage or control my spatial orientation, my mass, or my inertia, which means that I can't control my body. That makes me want to physically injure the person in a brutal way, until I'm back in control of my body. If it's someone I care about picking me up, I don't like being put in the position of wanting to seriously hurt them, so I would ask that they refrain.
yeah, I get that...
guess i was thinking that if it was a relationship of trust, then it could just be treated as a bit of fun... sort of the way I was expected to take it all in fun when my brothers or boyfriend did it to me
It isn't about trust. If they don't like it, any amount of trust doesn't change that.
but checkout football or soccer, guys are aways picking up other guys. I think this actually has more to do with me being a female showing strength (domination?) over a male
Maybe for some men.0 -
It's an instinctive response - - being off of the ground means I can't use any leverage or control my spatial orientation, my mass, or my inertia, which means that I can't control my body. That makes me want to physically injure the person in a brutal way, until I'm back in control of my body. If it's someone I care about picking me up, I don't like being put in the position of wanting to seriously hurt them, so I would ask that they refrain.
yeah, I get that...
guess i was thinking that if it was a relationship of trust, then it could just be treated as a bit of fun... sort of the way I was expected to take it all in fun when my brothers or boyfriend did it to me
It isn't about trust. If they don't like it, any amount of trust doesn't change that.
but checkout football or soccer, guys are aways picking up other guys. I think this actually has more to do with me being a female showing strength (domination?) over a male
Maybe for some men.
ooo... so tempted to flirt, but my husband is watching...0 -
bahaha... awesome pic!0
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i thought it was funny as hell lol i don't mind being picked up its the showing off that would bug me. for example if she wants to pick me up carry me some where just to have a laugh i don't mind. the showing off would be picking me up all the time to every person she meets that would bug me. girl power all the way0
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I'd be pretty impressed at a woman that could pick me up and throw me over her shoulder. Seriously impressed. . . It's never happened so I can't say how I'd react ... but I can't picture hating it.0
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