Sabotage and flatulence

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Replies

  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
    Brussel Sprouts - like a Belgian freight train through your lower intestines.

    This too! I had a raw Brussels sprouts salad with dinner one night last week. I was killin' it the next morning! Oh, and get some shirataki noodles and cook them in the office microwave. You're welcome. :wink:
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
    My husband says he levels the office after eating my spaghetti sauce.... the trick is an ever amount of garlic!

    Do you deliver?

    England?
  • Ashwee87
    Ashwee87 Posts: 695 Member
    I should ship you some White Castle sliders... it will melt your anal hairs and will burn their eyes.

    /thread mate

    Tears are in my eyes from the laughter. xD
  • janegalt37
    janegalt37 Posts: 270 Member
    Psyllium husk fiber. Just mix some with water and down it 3 times a day. You'll never have a moment of silence again.
  • AZ_Gato
    AZ_Gato Posts: 1,270 Member
    Protien shake and tuna three days in a row will solve your problems.
  • clouxles
    clouxles Posts: 71 Member
    They make a beer up here in Canada called Creemore lager when I drink it my family hides...
  • TravisBikes
    TravisBikes Posts: 674 Member
    Lentils, almonds, quiona, etc. Do this type of food for 2-3 meals of your day and you will have no problems.
  • magerum
    magerum Posts: 12,589 Member
    Lots and lots of cheap whey
  • jamk1446
    jamk1446 Posts: 5,577 Member
    I used to eat smoked oysters in the office and hide the empty tin in a trash can near a person that annoyed me.

    Had them sniffing around and digging through trash cans in the afternoon.

    Oh this. Or sardines or mackerel.
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    Include lots of fiber and beans into your diet. That stuff will make sure you're gassy all day long. I think you need to get out of SBD mode and just shift towards full on earth shaking flatulence.

    Fiber one fiber bars will make you fart all day long.
    Probably not smelly ones though. Might have to mix it up.
  • 3dogsrunning
    3dogsrunning Posts: 27,167 Member
    Lots and lots of cheap whey

    This and beans for lunch. One of my college classmates thought it would be really funny to eat this right before our 6 hour drive home for the weekend. It was a long long smelly trip. It even got to be too much for him by the end. The car still stunk when they picked me up on Sunday to go back.
  • ghdsmais
    ghdsmais Posts: 31 Member
    Just be careful not to gamble and lose. I don't think you want to sabotage yourself in your great journey

    This is making my day!!!!!!
  • Ashkea76
    Ashkea76 Posts: 7,162 Member
    If you don't like the people you work with, plant one employee's underwear in another employee's desk and start a malicious rumor. Allow it to escalate and make sure everyone is forced to take sides.

    After a week or so, cut an apple in half and hide it in the ceiling above the desk with the stolen undergarments. Within a day, there will be so many fruit flies, maintenance will be forced to search the surrounding area, including the desk, finding the underwear.

    After a series of escalating firings, you should be promoted to a place where you have a say in who is hired. I vote for beautiful young Bosnians.

    Hmmm . . . this is interesting . . . do you have any suggestions on how to obtain this underwear? We don't have a work locker room or anything of that nature so it might be a bit difficult.

    HEY, no room here for whiners! I you're going to commit to this revenge plan you're going to have to go all the way. And I mean ALL the way. You want this revenge or not?

    The trick here is obvious.....pick on the unassuming guy, and make sure you write the name of the person in the underwear....like his mother would do....then I think you're golden. If they're women's panties, you'll need to go all Laverne and Shirley and get some monogrammed ones...lol

    Good Luck with your diabolical plan....gas man
  • Fvaisey
    Fvaisey Posts: 5,506 Member
    Venison and/or leeks is a North Country staple. Works on volume and odor!
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
    Hard-boiled eggs. I learned the hard way that those and treadmills do not mix.
  • SerenaFisher
    SerenaFisher Posts: 2,170 Member
    There are people really making me mad at my work. I work in an office btw. The way I have chosen to deal with them is to eat food that gives me very bad gas and to make them sit through it. I already consume alot of broccoli and eggs but I think they're getting used to it.

    Are there other things I should include in my diet to make my flatulence more frequent and intolerable?
    Spinach
  • amandammmq
    amandammmq Posts: 394 Member
    I am kind of hoping for an update on this thread.

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