I hate being the fattest person at the gym.

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  • kmm7309
    kmm7309 Posts: 802 Member
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    I'm not gonna lie and say people don't notice you. People have eyes, but think about this:

    "I'm the most uncoordinated person at this gym, I feel stupid trying to do anything physical, and am afraid I'll trip over my own feet"

    "I'm the ugliest person at this gym, everyone else makes me feel bad for existing"

    "I'm the oldest person at this gym, all these young people aren't in pain like me"

    "I'm the youngest person at the gym, everyone else has got their life together"

    "I'm the scrawniest person at the gym, everyone else has got more muscle than me, and I can't seem to gain"

    "I'm the worst swimmer at this gym, I'd love to go in the pool but I'd drown"

    I LOVED THIS. It is essentially what I was trying to say, but I am not so eloquent! Everyone has insecurities. Just because you think you stand out for being fat, they feel like they stand out for something else that seems important to them.
  • jen81uk
    jen81uk Posts: 177 Member
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    Trust me most people don't care. They are there to do their work out. There are much more entertaining things to see... like guys loving each others muscles, touching them and posing incessantly in the mirror hahaha! And in my case a guy who came in batman pj bottoms, legend, and a 60 year old lady who decided to walk round naked and stand talking to me in the changing rooms... seriously woman, get a towel, I do not need to be seeing your minnie!!!!

    Keep at it, you are making yourself healthier and use it to motivate you that one day you won't be :)

    xx
  • jadelunar
    jadelunar Posts: 31 Member
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    I hate it too. You're totally not alone. People DO stare at the larger people, as much as others want to say they don't, they're wrong. You just have to tough it out and push through. Eventually you will start to make progress and not feel so alienated. It helps me to bring a friend to the gym to work out or even take a class. If there are regulars that attend the classes, you can start to make friends there too. It also helps to stare back at the lookers. They tend to leave me alone then.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,775 Member
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    When I walked my fat 232 lb *kitten* into the gym the first time and nearly died after 20 minutes on the threadmill, one thought kept running through my mind -

    One day, instead of laughing and commenting about how fat I am, these people will say "Wow, isn't that the fat chick who passed out of the treadmill? Look at her now, she looks great! And look how heavy she lifts!"
  • conniemaxwell5
    conniemaxwell5 Posts: 943 Member
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    I want to know where are all the people like me who need it?

    They don't have the courage you have! Stick to it and do not feel self conscious. I was you a few months ago and this morning a lady at the gym stopped me and said, "I've been watching your transformation, you look amazing!"

    Also, when I see larger people at the gym, I am cheering them on so loud on the inside of me!
  • AIZZO4
    AIZZO4 Posts: 404 Member
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    I bet you are one of the most beautiful people in that gym.
  • anneerick
    anneerick Posts: 147 Member
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    http://flintland.blogspot.ca/2012/05/hey-fat-girl.html

    This is a great read..... similar to what you are talking about. I read it once in awhile to remind myself....
  • maegmez
    maegmez Posts: 341 Member
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    Awesome that you are working out and that you keep going back!

    I am the biggest at my body combat class but I never miss a beat and I'm right there jumping and kicking just as much as the fit ladies and then I notice very thin ladies struggling to keep up or improvising.

    It was hard looking at myself in those mirrors but in the month that I started, I have lost about 10 pounds and its just going to keep going down, it's easier to look in the mirror now.
  • RobinSchneid
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    I have found it very humbling to be the worst person in hot Bikram yoga class. Even people larger than me can do more postures than I can and I have awful balance.

    Whenever I see larger people in yoga, walking or at the gym I always think very positively of them. They are trying and doing something about it! Also it takes courage which is not easy. Keep going and don't let anyone keep you down. There are plenty of folks at the gym that I'm sure feel the way I do and admire you for getting out there and working on your body.
  • petstorekitty
    petstorekitty Posts: 592 Member
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    Ignore them, or better yet, use their bodies as motivation for what you will look like!!

    And in all honesty, NO ONE IS LOOKING AT YOU! Almost everyone is focused on they way they look themselves, and looking at themselves in the mirrors, which are there for a reason... ;-)

    If it makes you feel good to go to the gym, KEEP GOING and don't let them discourage you! You are there for YOU, not for them to possibly be judgmental! They should be impressed that you are motivated and doing whatever you can to get in shape!

    This!!

    I get discouraged seeing super fit girls atthe gym BUT then I think, "what are THEY doing to get llike that?!?!"

    I'll totally check them out and their workouts. And keep going! Eventually you'll be smaller or fitter or whatever and you'll feel great.

    If I see ANYONE doing a kickass workout I look and I am impressed no matter what their size. I think that is pretty across-the-board too.

    Most of us are there for the same reason. To get healthy and fit.
  • treagal
    treagal Posts: 264 Member
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    You should feel damn proud that you have the ambition to get your *kitten* to the gym in the first place. And I will bet that everyone there sees you working your *kitten* off and is proud of you too! Way to make a lifestyle chage!
  • ctpeace
    ctpeace Posts: 327 Member
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    Also, this is a good indication that all the work you're putting in will WORK. Something got those people that amazing looking... and now that you're doing the same thing... think of it as looking into the future at your new hot body!
  • dumb_blondes_rock
    dumb_blondes_rock Posts: 1,568 Member
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    I have been there girly, during kickboxing.....but it was so sweet that people would be so proud of me after the workout and tell me how good I was doing and whether you know it or not, you are being an inspiration to someone there. Your motivation can rub off on someone else that might be on the verge of slipping back into bad habits. I also felt self conscious because they would make you run and I know everyone could see my jiggley butt and my boobs and belly just swinging out of control while their's was all tight lol
  • JoanB5
    JoanB5 Posts: 610 Member
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    Best comment I saw on this once: Many of those people all started where you are.

    You will soon be "most improved", so keep at it. You'll earn their respect. : )
  • lporter229
    lporter229 Posts: 4,907 Member
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    This may sound harsh, but people are more likely to pass judgement on an overweight person eating at a restaurant than working out at the gym. I echo what others have already said, most people will respect you for being there despite the fact that you may feel uncomfortable. Don't let this feeling deter you from achieving your goals. Maybe you can try striking up a conversation with someone to help you get over the intimidation factor. At the end of the day, everyone there has one thing in common. They are trying to improve their health in one way or another. You deserve this just as much as anyone else.
  • iggyboo93
    iggyboo93 Posts: 524 Member
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    (this was posted in the forums a while ago - seemed appropriate to resurrect it)

    Hey Fat Girl

    Yes, you. The one feigning to not see me when we cross paths on the running track. The one not even wearing sports gear, breathing heavy. You’re slow, you breathe hard and your efforts at moving forward make you cringe.

    You cling shyly to the furthest corridor, sometimes making larger loops on the gravel ring by the track just so you’re not on it. You sweat so much that your hair is all wet. You rarely stay for more than 20 minutes at a time, and you look exhausted when you leave to go back home. You never talk to anyone. I’ve got something I’d like to say to you.

    You are awesome.

    If you’d look me in the eye only for an instant, you would notice the reverence and respect I have for you. The adventure you have started is tremendous; it leads to a better health, to renewed confidence and to a brand new kind of freedom. The gifts you will receive from running will far exceed the gigantic effort it takes you to show up here, to face your fears and to bravely set yourself in motion, in front of others.

    You have already begun your transformation. You no longer accept this physical state of numbness and passivity. You have taken a difficult decision, but one that holds so much promise. Every hard breath you take is actually a tad easier than the one before, and every step is ever so slightly lighter. Each push forward leaves the former person you were in your wake, creating room for an improved version, one that is stronger, healthier and forward-looking, one who knows that anything is possible.

    You’re a hero to me. And, if you’d take off the blaring headphones and put your head up for more than a second or two, you would notice that the other runners you cross, the ones that probably make you feel so inadequate, stare in awe at your determination. They, of all people, know best where you are coming from. They heard the resolutions of so many others, who vowed to pick up running and improve their health, “starting next week”. Yet, it is YOU who runs alongside, who digs from deep inside to find the strength to come here, and to come back again.

    You are a runner, and no one can take that away from you. You are relentlessly moving forward. You are stronger than even you think, and you are about to be amazed by what you can do. One day, very soon, maybe tomorrow, you’ll step outside and marvel at your capabilities. You will not believe your own body, you will realize that you can do this. And a new horizon will open up for you. You are a true inspiration.

    I bow to you.
  • Ibarra951
    Ibarra951 Posts: 19 Member
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    Keep pushing, keep working, keep at it. I'm not the most fit person in the gym, but i'm not the biggest. But, when I do see larger individuals I tend to respect them more than I think they know. I applaud the fact that they're in the gym! They're making an effort!

    I often cheer individuals as I run, or if I see people running I feel like yelling a cheer at them because I am happy for them! I'm happier for the larger and/or slower individuals because it's usually always them that could use that extra boost of motivation because it (probably) took a lot of courage to get them out there in the first place!

    So keep at it, and if I see you i'll be sure to give you a high five 8 )
  • girlfromOklahoma
    girlfromOklahoma Posts: 129 Member
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    My mother and father in law are both obese. My father in law is nearly 400 pounds. My husband and I hope and pray that someday he'll find the motivation to get off the couch and get some exercise. However, in the 13 year I've been a part of their family, I've not known him to lose any weight or do any exercise, only gain year after year.

    I started my personal weight loss journey back in February. I was 154 lbs and considered overweight according to my BMI. Before I started, I felt like losing 24 pounds would be the equivlent to climbing Mount Everest. However, I've now lost 18 pounds and am now at a normal weight. I look at how far I've come in these months and I feel GREAT about myself. My Mount Everest was 24 pounds and it took me 2 years to talk myself in attempting to climb it. So when I see someone working to climb their Mount Everest of say 100+ pounds, yes I do stop and take notice. Not because I'm making fun of them or whatever. Simply because I'm admiring their courage and determination!!
  • ilenelynne
    ilenelynne Posts: 36 Member
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    I felt exactly the same way. The girls in my gym are gorgeous. But then I found out that they are all so nice and not judgemental at all. This morning - one of them came up to me and commented that she noticed how hard I work and she could see that i have lost weight. Be friendly and they will be friendly back!
  • FrnkLft
    FrnkLft Posts: 1,821 Member
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    I'll be honest here, I noticed a woman at the gym the other day who was very big (you're small in comparison) and it was noticable.

    But she got in there, she was serious about what she was doing, and you could tell she was working hard, and I haven't paid it a second thought since (she goes pretty frequently). I'm glad you're keeping it up and I hope you will continue to. It might take a while but the good thing about loosing weight is that so long as you're progressing, you're continuously looking better and will likely feel better too.

    Just some background, I've never been over weight but I'm short for a man 5'4, and I'm sure people notice that when they first meet me. But just like anything else, so long as I literally keep my head up and get on with my buisness most people just forget lol I kick *kitten* in the gym and I strive to operate in a way that people can't help but respect me ;)

    P.S. It's a bonus you're pretty too ;)