Starting over again

A year and half I started taking control of my health from what I eat to exercising and how I would react to others around me. I felt so much better when I was dedicating approximately 90 minutes per day to me. Growing up I despised any form of exercise, I could not believe how I honestly could not wait until the next day to get in my jog/walk! In December I ended up having to have surgery and I have became quite lazy again. I could come up with a hundred excuses as to why but that would be all they are... excuses. I do have to say that I have struggled recovering from this last surgery and I get told "it can take a year to recover,"... are you serious?!? From my heaviest of 267 pounds I had lost 61 pounds but now I have started gaining again. I am not going to let this happen again!

Over the winter my medical health has taken a small nose dive. In a nutshell I am diabetic (type 2), I have asthma, a heart and liver issues and high cholesterol. Recently I have had to increase my insulin and I have been finding myself eating without a reason. I have found myself in another vicious cycle of eating and then mentally beating myself up over it. I am now back up to 210 pounds (I know it is only a 4 lb. gain but it is still a gain) and my overall goal is to be down to 180lbs. I know just from my couple days of writing down everything that goes into my mouth that I have to drastically change what I eat but finding even with my good intentions I am failing.

Growing up we were taught to not rely on others for help as that was more of a sign of weakness than strength. I have a hard time asking for help and motivation but finding I am losing the war of losing weight. With that being said, I am looking for friends to be able to reach out to for motivation and won't look down upon me for my many weaknesses.

Excited for this journey,
Tanja