Counting Calories: Not for Me

ArchangelMJ · April 2013

(Brace yourself for brutal honesty, lol.)

Okay, so I've just realized that I really need to stop counting calories. I can't seem to manage without being subdued by ED behaviors (in my case, binging/purging) I don't know that I'd consider what I have to be bulimia, (due to frequency) but I definitely have exhibited bulimic tendencies off and on for at least the past year. While I became far more obsessed with weight-loss/body image/fitness than I've ever been in my life, I didn't start binging and purging until I began counting calories.

In the past I lost 20 lbs, and while I wasn't at my goal weight of 135, (which some would consider low for 5'9", but it'd be a 19.9 BMI, which I think is perfectly fine for my frame.) I was the happiest I'd ever been with my weight. However, I was far from satisfied with my body fat percentage, and I started counting calories in an effort to lower it and lose more. I found that I became far too obsessed with food and that it was a hindrance more than a help. In fact, I had lost the weight previously without counting calories. (though I did count exercise calories for a while)

Within a few months I gained the weight back, and when I decided to seriously lose it again, I started counting calories. At first it seemed like a good idea, but I've come to realize it's just counterproductive for me. I was so focused on measuring every morsel and all I'd think about was what I was going to eat and when. It was distracting me from other priorities and it's culminated in binging/purging cycles that I'm far from proud of. So, I'm not going to count anymore and I think I may be fine with that, despite some fear and anxiety.

Has anyone else decided that counting isn't for them? Frankly, I have a lot of issues, and I realize that as someone who's normal weight, and apparently prone to ED behaviors, that it makes sense that it doesn't work for me. But can anyone else relate? (btw, I've never used the MFP diary thing, I just tracked on my own in a notebook, and I didn't even do 1200 calories, that's *way* too low for me, lol.)

mimiwin · April 2013

Yes I had the same problem and I just saw a post out there pretty much discribing that

we are all different and what works for one at some point in their life might not work for you or work for you at the time you try it... It has leaded me to binging/ starvation mode at time too.
Good luck with everything and Hope we manage to accept ourselves the way we are most time than not !! I think it's about being happy in your own skin even if you feel their is room for impropvement

mimiwin · April 2013

the other post I mentioned is "TOPIC: Mfp has cause more harm than good for me from Graelwyn75

kellehbeans · April 2013

You. Are. Not. A. Special. Snowflake.

Chances are you're just doing it wrong.

Did you even bother reading her post? She wasn't complaining about not being able to lose weight.

EDIT: OP, it's not for everyone. It can make people with underlying ED's or another type of disorder worse. I hope you feel better soon, and find a way that works for you. :flowerforyou:

XXXMinnieXXX · April 2013

Well done for recognising the pattern and realising the trigger. If you find your still struggling with the issues when you stop counting, then seek professional advice!

For those with the snowflake and get a grip comment... Not helpful.

Zara

niki87lewis · April 2013

You. Are. Not. A. Special. Snowflake.

Chances are you're just doing it wrong.

Love it when people don't even bother reading the post

spamantha57 · April 2013

^ Seriously! How rude the first two responses are! Obviously did not read the post or understand what they're talking about!

Anyway OP, I can see what you're saying & a lot of people have the same issue. Have you tried maybe looking at things in a different way, like instead of seeing things negatively (only can have/ limit to a certain number of calories) & look at a more positive angle: Look at goals you want to have in food. Like having at least 30 grams of fiber a day, or 100 grams of protein - whatever your macros may be. That's what I do a lot. If I'm halfway through my day & thinking about eating something, I think of what I need more of for the day. Try not to think of food as something you have to limit, so much as the things you SHOULD be eating. Honestly, when you're trying to goal yourself for all the good things you want to get throughout the day, you really won't have a lot of room to eat crap.

Hope that helps a bit!

abrahamsitososa · April 2013

Maybe a psychologist can help you with the binging and purging thing. It's a psychological thing.

hayleymc3 · April 2013

First of all, please ignore the rude commentors who stepped in merely to make themselves feel cool. It's quite the common thing around the message boards.

Secondly, if counting calories arises ED tendencies in you, I strongly suggest to stop counting calories. I don't count mine either, because doing so can cause psychological issues for me. It just doesn't work.

As far as being a special snowflake, you are in fact. Every one who is a member here has a unique story and if someone doesn't want to count calories, so be it.

gazzala85 · April 2013

i hear u i feel for u!!! i get so stressed sometimes about calories. when i binge i end up taking laxatives to purge and i hate it. i hope your ok and if u want to talk about just message me

best of luck

neandermagnon · April 2013

(Brace yourself for brutal honesty, lol.)

Okay, so I've just realized that I really need to stop counting calories. I can't seem to manage without being subdued by ED behaviors (in my case, binging/purging) I don't know that I'd consider what I have to be bulimia, (due to frequency) but I definitely have exhibited bulimic tendencies off and on for at least the past year. While I became far more obsessed with weight-loss/body image/fitness than I've ever been in my life, I didn't start binging and purging until I began counting calories.

were your calories too low?

bingeing is a normal survival response to eating too few calories. That doesn't mean all bingeing is caused by that, because sometimes it's purely a psychological thing, but IMO that needs to be ruled out before diagnosing yourself with a psychological problem. So when someone only starts binge eating in response to calorie counting or any particular diet they started, IMO there's a strong likelihood that they were undereating significantly, and the binges were the body's survival responses kicking in. Purging is not a survival response, but it is a response to the binge that just happened, most people feel really guilty after a binge, because they think they did something bad and terrible.... rather than seeing it for what it is, a survival response caused by eating too little. many people respond to binges by being more restrictive with their diet or exercising excessively, or purging, and all of these actually make the problem worse, not better, because the body is still deprived of the food that it needs, the survival response of bingeing is going to kick in again sooner or later, and the more restrictive you are, the more likely it's going to happen sooner rather than later.

The way to stop this, is to stop the excessive calorie restriction. Bring your calorie intake back up to a healthy level. If you're already fairly lean, you should not eat less than TDEE -10%. If you are unable to do that due to psychological issues such as fear of weight gain, fear of eating that much, etc, then seek professional help. Additionally, if you're absolutely certain that you were not undereating, and that the bingeing is purely psychological, seek professional help for that.

delonda1 · April 2013

I totally understand...took me awhile to stop obsessing and realize its not just about the calories...sometimes thats hard for people and can make them obsessed to an unhealthy degree....

but remember that bodyfat that you want isnt just about the counting calories its about the overall nutrition and the workout..

i would stop counting for awhile and just track the workouts you are doing, eat normally , GOOD LUCK

myofibril · April 2013

Whilst you need a calorie deficit to lose body fat you don't need to count a single calorie to achieve that state.

Calorie counting isn't for everyone. In fact, many people are incredibly successful without it.

Try something else that is a good fit for you.

EmmaKarney · April 2013

I've gone through weird patches whilst using this site - but I've been using hypnotherapy to get on top of my emotional and psychological issues with food and now I'm completely happy with my tracking.

katy_trail · April 2013

I second everything neander said, and add that I felt that calorie counting wasn't for me for the same basic reasons, that it makes me way to obsessive, but I have found using mfp detabase drastically easier than just the paper method. especially if you tend to eat the same foods or recipes throughout the month, once you've saved what you eat often or it's in the frequently used sections, it is much easier and becomes a few clicks in a matter of mins. I didn't need to track to lose, as long as I wasn't depressed, but I started tracking on here to work on eating more protein, 2x as much as I was used to actually, and I don't think i need to count most days.

elyelyse · April 2013

for me personally, its that semi-obsession and ritual that allows me to control a previously uncontrollable habit of just eating and eating without thinking about what was going into my body at all. but I can ABSOLUTELY see that for someone else, it could push them over the edge towards unhealthy behaviors. I strongly recommend you see a professional about the binge/purge behavior. You said its a cycle you aren't proud of, but don't let that turn into an embarrassment that prevents you from getting help.

also, don't let anyone here, or anywhere else, tell you "you're doing it wrong" just bc counting calories isn't for you.

theblondetrick · April 2013

You obviously have psychological problems.I think a lot of us here do.I do too,but in a different way( I don't purge,I just binge from time to time).
I think you need find out what really makes you binge and purge.If you can't do it on your own,maybe you should visit a psychologist.
I don't think it has anything with counting calories.It's all in your head.

Vailara · April 2013

I've had unwanted psychological symptoms in the past while dieting, and when that happens I stop the diet. I'm doing this for my health, and having those symptoms is not healthy. I think that applies particularly if you're already at a "healthy" weight. It's just not worth the risk.

It might be best to stop calorie counting for now and see if the symptoms go. I have found that for me, stopping dieting solves the problem. If that's not the case for you, then please get some help with it.

I'm not having problems this time round and I'm not sure why. Maybe the following have helped: not eating too big a deficit, allowing "free" meals and treats, taking it slowly, not feeling guilty about eating, eating enough fat, eating enough generally. I'm sure I've read about a study showing that people deprived of calories started to become obsessive about food, so I feel the less deprivation the better!

Please ignore the mean comments here, and best of luck to you. I hope you get it sorted.

XxJessdNxX · April 2013

I'd encourage undertaking some sort of activity that will build the mental toughness and resiliance you're lacking to succeed at anything in life.

I never feel the need to respond to this boards but this post is disgraceful, you should be ashamed of yourself.

You know nothing about the OP or her life, your comments could be really damaging (and are totally irrelevant, given the contents of the original post)

Ebilfairylight · April 2013

Ignore all the people commenting about how it is just an act of willpower for you. I completely understand. Counting calories while already at a relatively healthy weight became the tipping point for me to develop an eating disorder. I lost track of my natural hunger cues, I am obsessed with food to the point of it being a psychological problem but I can't get myself out of the cycle of counting.

I think you should chat to a doctor - you are going to be much better off attempting a recovery program run specifically for people with eating disorders - that avoids many of the common things that can trigger our maladaptive behaviours.

You can get through this

Talk to someone in real life (Not on this forum where people are known for being unsupportive and ridiculing eating disorders as a lack of willpower).

To the people *****ing about her post - How about you back up and educate yourself.

FlaxMilk · April 2013

I agree with the recommendations to ignore the people on this thread who don't understand. It's not your problem to make them understand. I also agree that you should talk with a doctor about getting some help. Calorie counting is not enough of a trigger if there is not an underlying issue. Calorie counting may not ever be for you, but it still seems like you could use someone to talk to. Best wishes!

Counting Calories: Not for Me

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