the concept of losing weight.

i've told some close guy friends i wan't to lose weight. they shrug it off like it's easy.
"just eat less and move more" and "just eat healthier"

yes, that helps but i find it frustrating that they don't realize how difficult it can be. when i told some of them i lost 10 lbs in 2 months (which is great) they kinda looked at me like "that's it?" i got the impression that they think if i'm doing everything right, i should have lost 20 lbs in 2 months.

i am not not discussing my lifestyle with them anymore, because they don't understand. i realize it's going to take me till possibly next january-spring to lose the rest of my goal weight, so it does seem like an incredibly long time. but at least i'll get there at some point.
at this stage, i don't care how long it takes. i just wan't to be happy and healthy.

if it's so easy, why aren't we all skinny?
if you eat too many calories, you won't lose weight. if you eat too few calories, you'll stall and won't lose weight. people don't seem to understand this. it's the math of what works for your individual body!

sorry for the rant, just needed to put my thoughts somewhere.
anyone else have people pipe in on your life, acting like they know everything?

Replies

  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
    The concept is easy.

    The actual action of doing it is easy for some and hard for others. It's all mental.

    I got fat because I was lazy and liked to shovel food in my mouth. I still shovel food in my mouth, just a little less. And now I exercise.
  • peopletalk
    peopletalk Posts: 519 Member
    The concept is easy.

    The actual action of doing it is easy for some and hard for others. It's all mental.

    I got fat because I was lazy and liked to shovel food in my mouth. I still shovel food in my mouth, just a little less. And now I exercise.

    i'm going to quote myself again:

    "if you eat too many calories, you won't lose weight. if you eat too few calories, you'll stall and won't lose weight. people don't seem to understand this. "


    yes eat less, but if you eat too few, you'll stall! that's the part that bugs me.
    i may be wrong, but i feel like you almost have to eat the precise amount of calories for your body.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    you need to figure out what works best for you..

    some people eat 1200 calories a day and do fine on it...others try it and stall out..

    some people do TDEE - 20% and swear by that...

    some people eat six small meals a day ..some people do IF/lean gains...etc etc

    For me, I find that doing compound lifts four days a week and one cardio session while eating in a 500 cal deficit is the best way for me to maintain as much muscle as possible and lose body fat...

    it really is trial and error...
  • Johlawrence
    Johlawrence Posts: 236 Member
    I agree. It seems like it should be so easy, but it's not! I eat too much and I gain, I eat to little and I don't lose. I have yet to find the balance for me!!!
  • BigGuy47
    BigGuy47 Posts: 1,768 Member
    i've told some close guy friends i wan't to lose weight. they shrug it off like it's easy.
    They're guys. Men lose weight easier than women. It's not as easy for women to drop the weight.
  • Jenikki322
    Jenikki322 Posts: 14
    I agree with the calorie thing. It's very frustrating!! It's so hard to find just the right balance. :sigh:
  • There is also a significant difference in men vs women losing weight. I have to be extremely intentional to do everything right (count calories, exercise regular, eat just enough) to steadily lose weight. My fiance can just decide to "eat healthy" and he drops his excess pounds.
  • peopletalk
    peopletalk Posts: 519 Member
    I agree. It seems like it should be so easy, but it's not! I eat too much and I gain, I eat to little and I don't lose. I have yet to find the balance for me!!!

    exactly. it's like i lose 3-5 lbs and then stall out for a bit, then have to re-calculate my calories. i'm CONSTANTLY recalculating my calories. like almost every second week.
  • farmers_daughter
    farmers_daughter Posts: 1,632 Member
    And then you can eat just the right amount and still gain weight. It's not rocket science, some people get lucky, some people don't.

    None of us have truly figured it out, including the experts. Thats why it's such a struggle.

    Once we think we've figured out a solution, there lies another barrier or method of sabotage to set people up to fail.

    Some of it is just plain old genes, and what you do/eat matters nil.
  • bananasd09
    bananasd09 Posts: 57 Member
    i've told some close guy friends i wan't to lose weight. they shrug it off like it's easy.
    "just eat less and move more" and "just eat healthier"

    yes, that helps but i find it frustrating that they don't realize how difficult it can be. when i told some of them i lost 10 lbs in 2 months (which is great) they kinda looked at me like "that's it?" i got the impression that they think if i'm doing everything right, i should have lost 20 lbs in 2 months.

    i am not not discussing my lifestyle with them anymore, because they don't understand. i realize it's going to take me till possibly next january-spring to lose the rest of my goal weight, so it does seem like an incredibly long time. but at least i'll get there at some point.
    at this stage, i don't care how long it takes. i just wan't to be happy and healthy.

    if it's so easy, why aren't we all skinny?
    if you eat too many calories, you won't lose weight. if you eat too few calories, you'll stall and won't lose weight. people don't seem to understand this. it's the math of what works for your individual body!

    sorry for the rant, just needed to put my thoughts somewhere.
    anyone else have people pipe in on your life, acting like they know everything?

    10 Pounds in 2 months is amazing!!! I can hardly get down 1lb a month but I have less to lose and have been incorporating heavy weights.

    Your doing Great!
  • peopletalk
    peopletalk Posts: 519 Member
    i've told some close guy friends i wan't to lose weight. they shrug it off like it's easy.
    They're guys. Men lose weight easier than women. It's not as easy for women to drop the weight.
    i understand that. i wish they were just more supportive and happy for me. but they're going by what works for them.
    funny thing is, they're so skinny and eat like 3 baconators in one sitting lol
  • shadow2soul
    shadow2soul Posts: 7,692 Member
    yes, that helps but i find it frustrating that they don't realize how difficult it can be. when i told some of them i lost 10 lbs in 2 months (which is great) they kinda looked at me like "that's it?" i got the impression that they think if i'm doing everything right, i should have lost 20 lbs in 2 months.

    Well you have to consider all the weight loss companies out there that promise lots of weight loss in a short amount of time. Combine that with shows like the Biggest Loser and I think people are deluded into believing that weight loss is supposed to be something that happens extremely fast.
    i feel like you almost have to eat the precise amount of calories for your body.

    There probably is some truth to that. Now I'm not one of those people who believe that a body can function properly on less than 1200 calories a day, but I do think that everyone probably has a range of calorie intake where they lose weight easily without harming their health. For example:
    I track my weight along with net calorie intake daily and this is what I've noticed:
    - If I eat between 1600 - 1800 Net calories, weight just seems to fall off
    - If I eat less than 1600 net calories, I hold onto water weight until I up my calories (weird..I go up a few lbs..all water weight, but it doesn't come back off till I eat more)
    - I have yet to figure out what would cause me to gain actual fat, but I assume it's somewhere in the 2000 calorie range.

    I agree with ndj1979, you need to find what works for you.
  • karenertl
    karenertl Posts: 271 Member
    I've dropped some of the weight I wanted to and got to my first goal weight. (I figure if I break one big goal into a couple smaller goals, maybe I'll have an easier time with this.) Now it seems like I've stalled. It seems like some people just don't understand how difficult it can be for some people to lose weight.

    Feel free to add me as a friend. We can all use as much support as possible on here! :smile:
  • briabner
    briabner Posts: 427 Member
    I have also made it a personal decision not to really talk about trying to loose weight to many people. I feel like in the past when I have told people that I am dieting that they would hold standards over me. And they would call me out on things when I wanted candy or stuff like that. It is my personal decision to make this change and I dont really care about what others think or say to me this time. I am way more focused this time around. I definitely understand what you mean when its not easing figuring out numbers and the right balance for each individual person. 10 pounds in 2 months is the right way to be loosing, you have a much better chance of keeping the weight off doing it this way. Congrats and keep doing what you are doing and dont let other people get in your way
  • TigerPawsSC
    TigerPawsSC Posts: 20 Member
    The concept is easy.

    The actual action of doing it is easy for some and hard for others. It's all mental.

    I got fat because I was lazy and liked to shovel food in my mouth. I still shovel food in my mouth, just a little less. And now I exercise.

    i'm going to quote myself again:

    "if you eat too many calories, you won't lose weight. if you eat too few calories, you'll stall and won't lose weight. people don't seem to understand this. "


    yes eat less, but if you eat too few, you'll stall! that's the part that bugs me.
    i may be wrong, but i feel like you almost have to eat the precise amount of calories for your body.

    This should not bug you because it is not true. Lots of reasons to avoid eating too little. "You won't lose weight" is not one of those reasons.
  • lanandie12
    lanandie12 Posts: 3 Member
    Are you eating the same types of foods? If so you may need to shock your system. You body adapts to your diet and exercise plan and that is why you drop weight and then it stalls for a while and you may just need to throw your system off by changing things up. I figured out it's not how much I eat it's what I eat too. I eat 1200 calories of clean, lean meats like fish and chicken, lots of veggies and some fruits. I cut sugars all together (except fruit) and eat less grains and wheats. If you cut calories but don't actually change your eating habits your going to stall. My workout partner and I are compeletly different body types and our metabolism are not the same either and we both drop about 4 pounds a week with just cutting sugars and eating less grains and wheats. Just something to try. As for your friends, ignore them your doing great!!! 10lbs in 2 months is AMAZING!
  • Sjenny5891
    Sjenny5891 Posts: 717 Member
    And the biggest problem is that not everyone is made the same so what works for me may not work for you. I just love seeing the 6ft tall guys post about the 1200 minimum being too low when it is perfect for a 5'3" woman.

    I work in a factory full of guys. They like to tease me about what I eat constantly, but they are always the first to comment when I buy new "tight jeans".
  • I just had my Ah Ha moment... I have been busting my butt hitting the gym 5-6 days a week and keeping within my WW (before I switched) and MFP goals for several months and while my body has changed some I haven't seen the weight loss one would expect. I wasn't eating back my workout calories and my NET calories are almost exclusively under 1125 when my BMR is 1400 and I'm burning 450-800 calories every workout day.

    My point is that the basics are simple, but it can become complex when you limit your diet and exercise too much also. Last year I lost 20lbs only following WW and not working out. Now that I added in exercising it has thrown my entire diet system and I am having to relearn a system that will work.
  • diane1223
    diane1223 Posts: 43 Member
    I have also made it a personal decision not to really talk about trying to loose weight to many people. I feel like in the past when I have told people that I am dieting that they would hold standards over me. And they would call me out on things when I wanted candy or stuff like that. It is my personal decision to make this change and I dont really care about what others think or say to me this time. I am way more focused this time around. I definitely understand what you mean when its not easing figuring out numbers and the right balance for each individual person. 10 pounds in 2 months is the right way to be loosing, you have a much better chance of keeping the weight off doing it this way. Congrats and keep doing what you are doing and dont let other people get in your way

    I like this attitude! This is a new way of life, and I have decided I will always have to count my calories so I won't over do! Once I let go and stop counting, weight creeps back up! One day every once in a while is ok, but this will be a way of life for me!