Do I tell him?

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124

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  • moopity
    moopity Posts: 54 Member
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    please tell him. it's so important in a marriage to communicate -- even when it may feel a little awkward. he cannot read your mind, and the conversation might bring you closer :)
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
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    Such little faith in men. What have we ever done!

    *shakes head*

    Forgotten dating anniversaries apparently.
  • plateaued
    plateaued Posts: 199 Member
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    I think a good way to start this marraige is to lay a trap for him. Don't remind him. Then, after he forgets, get mad at him.

    Better yet, when you are disappointed that he forgot, become passive aggressive and when he asks what's wrong, tell him "nothing."
  • Lrdoflamancha
    Lrdoflamancha Posts: 1,280 Member
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    Remind him. Get used to doing so. It's just better that way.

    Amen. We are men, not calendars and most guys don't remember.

    I agree remind him.... but that being said, A friend just told us that 14,000 days ago he went out on the first date with the woman he eventtually married. and is till married to.
  • LadyTigressDiane
    LadyTigressDiane Posts: 15 Member
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    Men don't set out to disappoint the women they love.
    I actually do. That way when I decide to do something nice, they view it as extra special.


    that made me so sad to read, that you would purposedly go out of you way to hurt your partner's feeling
  • fightingthefood
    fightingthefood Posts: 45
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    If forgetting a date or in this case the thought of him forgetting a date is causing this much stress before you are married I would suggest taking a look at your relationship. Because down the road a few years and maybe a few kids later all you will really want is some time to be together without somebody else needing your attention. You can only get so many gifts before it becomes just stuff and something else that has to be dusted. Don't get me wrong we still give each other cards for special occasions, ones that are hand written and means something about our lifes and not ones off the shelf at Walmart. I do send her flowers but not just for special occasios or it might be having her favorite milkshake delivered to her work if she is having a really bad day. The last thing I need is another tie, tool, or fishing rod. However, A day with just the two of us without the kids, cell phones, or somewhere we have to be at a certian time, now that is a real gift to share together. Then you can spend the day remembering and showing why you chose to spend your lives together in the first place.
  • Maribel_1986
    Maribel_1986 Posts: 457 Member
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    It's best to remind him. So much easier to live life not expecting disappointment. Or getting disappointed.

    this. and while it is a special day, you do have another very special, very expensive day coming up. why don't you suggest just going out for dinner the two of you, and tell him you don't have to exchange gifts.

    I agree completely
  • Maribel_1986
    Maribel_1986 Posts: 457 Member
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    Thankfully my boyfriend remembers a couple of weeks before the actual anniversary
  • mrslosser
    mrslosser Posts: 54 Member
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    Be open and honest. If you want a gift, tell him. Guys are not mind readers and I think they like it if you are forward and just call it out as you want to see it. :) So if you want a gift, say, "Hey this is our last dating anniversary as we are getting married and I would like to celebrate it by.... exchanging gifts, having dinner, etc....
  • TheWiseCat
    TheWiseCat Posts: 297
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    Break up.
  • Vincentsz
    Vincentsz Posts: 407 Member
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    Coming from a mans perspective!

    We are horrible at hints!

    Just tell him!
  • AngryDiet
    AngryDiet Posts: 1,349 Member
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    He probably still remembers what you wore on that date.

    Actually, probably not. You were on the right track, but unless he got you out of that whatever, he doesn't remember much. Sorry. :)
  • zimfour
    zimfour Posts: 191 Member
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    Remind him. Get used to doing so. It's just better that way.

    Amen. We are men, not calendars and most guys don't remember.


    I agree..after 36 years I still do not remember dates like I used to....LOLOLOLOL
  • AngryDiet
    AngryDiet Posts: 1,349 Member
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    I'll say this. My wife helpfully suggested that I get our wedding date imprinted on the inside of my wedding ring.

    It helps, but it's no guarantee.
  • sangeyvang
    sangeyvang Posts: 182
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    you can remind him, although it is sweet when they remember on their own, but who knows?! lol. congratulations on getting married! me and my husband's anniversary is also July 4! :)
  • Bearbrat
    Bearbrat Posts: 230
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    Remind him, you have to speak up if there is something you want. I've often called my brother in law to remind him because my sister is so mean about it and refuses to say a word. My husband often doesn't remember our anniversary, strangely he's never forgotten my birthday lol.
  • christina0089
    christina0089 Posts: 709 Member
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    Remind him. Get used to doing so. It's just better that way.


    Hahaha agreed! I can not speak for all men but I really think something in their wiring does not allow them to remember dates... lol
  • Katieallen182
    Katieallen182 Posts: 1
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    just gently remind him. our men are wonderful and sweet and kind and don't do well with subtlety. and for your own peace of mind, get used to the idea that you will have to remind him of important dates regularly. My hubby and i have almost 10 years under our belt and I have come to realize that my hubby's heart always means well, but his memory or mouth doesn't always do the correct thing. Congrats on your wedding!!!
  • revmatched_itr
    revmatched_itr Posts: 5 Member
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    Don't remind him, it's going to make him feel like all you care about is some gift or some kind of reward/present/etc. It shouldn't be that big of a deal, it's like being together for so long is some kind of big accomplishment. Every couple goes through hard times, if you are getting married soon then you are obviously planning on being together for the run. Just know "we will always be together" and little milestones like anniversaries won't seem as important.

    It's like birthdays, people only care about certain birthdays but after so many years you forget how old you are and birthdays are just like any other day.

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