Feeling better is what makes it worth it.

Hey everybody,

For so many years my body physically hurt.....I never stepped on the scale to see how much damage i inflicted on myself but i knew the damage was there because i went from an 8 to 10, to 12 to 14 to 16 to 18 to 20 to 24 to 26 to 28.....28 was the biggest size I ever wore....i always fluctuated back and forth between 28 and 22 depending on what was good in life at the time.....anywho....I was in so much denial because my weight never went over 274 so i was like, yeah i need to lose weight but no matter what, my body never gets over 274 so i'm all good.....

GUESS WHAT....in October of 09, i had to have a hysterectomy and to my surprise, i stepped on the scale and was 304 lbs....can you say REALITY CHECK....I have never been outside of 274 so it was a real slap in the face to me.....The dr was like, Nissa, you need to lose 150 lbs just to be in a healthy range for you....I still didnt listen.....

After surgery, my body automatically started losing a lb here and there, not because I was doing something about it, but because some issues that were going on which cause weight gain, was now taken care of so automatically my body shed a few lbs getting me down to 294....

MY PCP then started really nagging me...Nissa you need to lose, you have to lose or you will die....my heart was getting worse, i went from non diabetic to diabetic, i have sleep apnea, i'm already severely anemic and just problem after problem......

I kept thinking about doing it and would tell people that I was going to do it but in all reality, i didnt know how to, nor did i think i would be capable of doing it so I put it off until my Aunt Tami went on a little vacation out of town....She went and visited her dad and brothers and everyday I would see her post on facebook how she was going walking, working out etc....My uncle and his wife both have had some really good weight loss and now my aunt was doing it and I felt left out....so my jealousy got my butt off the couch, out of the junk food and onto my journey of weight loss....

Now technically, seeing I was 304 lbs, I have lost in a whole, 34 lbs and I am feeling so much better than I used to, but I decided to only track the weight loss from the day of beginning MFP because thats when I actually got up, changed my lifestyle with food and eating and began to take my life back into my own hands.....

I started my journey 8 weeks ago and have lost 19 lbs....some say i should be losing larger amounts because I'm so heavy, but I dont listen to that....I'm choosing this for a lifetime and instead of rushing to lose, i'm taking it slow and steady so that when i'm at goal, i dont go backwards.....anyhow, back to my point.....just with the 19 lbs loss, I feel so much better.....My blood sugar count is coming down drastically to where I'm almost able to get off the diabetes medicine.....I do not have High Blood pressure and I can feel my heart is stronger.....I will forever be on heart medicine; however, its stronger......I never was obedient and wore my sleep apnea mask; however, I sleep better now and feel that in a good 6 months or so, i can go retake the test and they'll say I dont need it anyhow.....

so

to everyone struggling, please just remember the reason for this....we will all stumble and fall....we will all eat something we shouldnt but thats because we are human....We can love food, just not over indulge in it.....Keep up the good work and remember the whole reason for losing weight...Its not to please man, please people, please spouse etc....its to please self and to be healthier so that we can live life again.....