People that are Starving themselves

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ekahnicole
ekahnicole Posts: 216 Member
in Food and Nutrition
It baffles me when I look at some people's diaries and see 500-800 calories a day, often with over 500 calories burned in exercise in a day.

Honestly it's such a sad thing to see, if they haven't developed an eating disorder, they will.

And you know what's worse (and what prompted me making this thread) is seeing people commenting after they complete their entry saying "great day!" "way to go" "awesome job!"

:/

I don't know if I should take them off of my friend's list or what, I just can't stand seeing that.
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Replies

  • Heyyleigh
    Heyyleigh Posts: 268 Member
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    delete them, and move on. it too drives me crazy- all the threads too about 1200 cals etc....
  • EricMurano
    EricMurano Posts: 825 Member
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    Can't save everyone.
  • Serah87
    Serah87 Posts: 5,481 Member
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    I delete them. It makes it hard for me when they're dropping weight like crazy and I am doing it slowly, slow and steady wins every time. :happy:
  • Nikki_WantsIt
    Nikki_WantsIt Posts: 204 Member
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    OP: I looove your hair.
  • seena511
    seena511 Posts: 685 Member
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    And you know what's worse (and what prompted me making this thread) is seeing people commenting after they complete their entry saying "great day!" "way to go" "awesome job!"

    this makes me so angry. i have a disclaimer in my profile not to add me if you starve yourself. if someone i add consistently logs under 1200 net, i unfriend.
  • heidihorton
    heidihorton Posts: 110 Member
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    I agree, I do stay at 1200 cals but if I exercise I eat them back. It was a gradual reduction for me from when I started so I don't think I noticed any starvation but agree with logging 800 cals and burning 500 is soooo bad for you not trying to be snarky I really do agree :)
  • FitandFab33
    FitandFab33 Posts: 718 Member
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    Yeah- that IS disordered eating.

    I don't keep MFP pals with those behaviors (with former tendencies I find it's a trigger for me) unless they're in active recovery and looking for support for that aspect.
  • americangirlok
    americangirlok Posts: 228 Member
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    I'm not sure that everyone looks at the diary before commenting. I think sometimes people have lots of friends and see that "so and so completed their diary and is under their calorie goal." And sometimes will respond "Way to go" w/ out actually looking through it.

    But I do think that there are folks that either think netting 500 calories is good and aim for that and congratulate their friends for netting so low. And I think there's a difference between one or two super low days rather than every day being super low.

    But at any rate I like food, so it's a pretty rare occurrence for me to get that low- and I'm just trying to not encourage super small net numbers like that if I encounter it on my news feed. Maybe they have a reason for it, maybe they don't but I don't feel like looking at someone's diary here and there gives me the right to tell them they have an eating disorder. I have friends that truly do- and honestly I think if someone were using MFP to aid them in their anorexia they'd probably close their diary, or log things they didn't eat just so that people wouldn't be jumping on them about it (out of concern, not to be a giant DB). And I think there are people that are trying to recover from an eating disorder and are posting honestly about their logs and need all the encouragment they can get.

    Anywho, yeah, my goal is to not encourage super small numbers, but I'm not going to start prying and throwing out the term "eating disorder" for people who net really low, really often. If I develop a rapport w/ them I might kindly say something, but I'm not sure that my newsfeed is the place for that. (And I deliberately leave my "diet" stuff and weight loss goals off of facebook b/c I don't want to trigger those friends to fall when they are fighting so hard for normal and healthy and to stay in recovery.)
  • ekahnicole
    ekahnicole Posts: 216 Member
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    this makes me so angry. i have a disclaimer in my profile not to add me if you starve yourself. if someone i add consistently logs under 1200 net, i unfriend.

    I'm going to add a disclaimer in mine as well
  • ekahnicole
    ekahnicole Posts: 216 Member
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    OP: I looove your hair.

    Thank you! xD
  • ekahnicole
    ekahnicole Posts: 216 Member
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    I'm not sure that everyone looks at the diary before commenting. I think sometimes people have lots of friends and see that "so and so completed their diary and is under their calorie goal." And sometimes will respond "Way to go" w/ out actually looking through it.

    But I do think that there are folks that either think netting 500 calories is good and aim for that and congratulate their friends for netting so low. And I think there's a difference between one or two super low days rather than every day being super low.

    But at any rate I like food, so it's a pretty rare occurrence for me to get that low- and I'm just trying to not encourage super small net numbers like that if I encounter it on my news feed. Maybe they have a reason for it, maybe they don't but I don't feel like looking at someone's diary here and there gives me the right to tell them they have an eating disorder. I have friends that truly do- and honestly I think if someone were using MFP to aid them in their anorexia they'd probably close their diary, or log things they didn't eat just so that people wouldn't be jumping on them about it (out of concern, not to be a giant DB). And I think there are people that are trying to recover from an eating disorder and are posting honestly about their logs and need all the encouragment they can get.

    Anywho, yeah, my goal is to not encourage super small numbers, but I'm not going to start prying and throwing out the term "eating disorder" for people who net really low, really often. If I develop a rapport w/ them I might kindly say something, but I'm not sure that my newsfeed is the place for that. (And I deliberately leave my "diet" stuff and weight loss goals off of facebook b/c I don't want to trigger those friends to fall when they are fighting so hard for normal and healthy and to stay in recovery.)

    I ended up looking at 2 weeks worth of diary entries for this particular person, they were between 500-800 every single day and burned over 500 calories in exercise every day, plus eating very little real food. Mostly protein bars.

    That is most definitely different than occasionally netting below 1200 cals (I know I have 2-3 days since I've been here where I only netted 700-1000, but it wasn't because I was *trying* to eat that low).
  • americangirlok
    americangirlok Posts: 228 Member
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    That is different. I missed that you were referring to a specific person and not just people in general who routinely net that low. My thought is that if it's triggering you to engage in something unhealthy that you probably need to disengage from this person, but if it's someone you feel like you've developed a relationship with then I would send him or her a private message and just say something like, "hey, I noticed your diary and I was wondering if you are happy with what you are eating and are you feeling good most days?" and try to offer some kind advice, but clearly you know the person you are talking about better than I do.

    I'm just saying that I personally do not feel like I know enough about the people in my news feed that I would feel comfortable confronting them about it- out of fear that they'd take it the wrong way and it wouldn't help them but make it worse. It's hard enough to help those people that are my real world friends, let alone the ones I only know through MFP. But I haven't been here long and maybe when I've had more interaction with them I would.

    And I absolutely agree that cheering people on for routinely (like 5 days out of 7) netting around 500 calories is not helpful. But I know that there have been days I see the generic newsfeed message pop up and say good job w/out having culled through the data in the diary.
  • americangirlok
    americangirlok Posts: 228 Member
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    And yes, your hair is super cool!
  • DistractedGrace
    DistractedGrace Posts: 31
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    Don't unfriend me! I rarely look at other people's food diaries. If I am reinforcing a negative behavior, I don't realize it. I will have to be more careful.
  • tcj83704
    tcj83704 Posts: 8
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    Hi everyone, I'm new to all of this calorie counting stuff but I'm having a bit of a problem. Actually an opposite problem from what I thought I'd have. I log everything that goes into my mouth, and MFP gave me a goal intake of 1400 per day. As dumb as this sounds, I'm having a really hard time meeting this goal. I come in around 1000 per day, and often find days that I go drink a glass of milk or eat something when I really am not hungry just to be over 1200. I read somewhere that under 1200 was not good. I feel like I eat a lot. For example, today I had one packet of 100 cal oatmeal for breakfast and 2 Tbsp of half and half in my coffee, a banana a couple hours later. Then a frozen lean cuisine for lunch. Then a fiber one bar. For dinner I had baked potatoes, 4 oz of roast beef, and carrots. This all came in at about 998 for the whole day. I ate a pb&j 2 hours after dinner just to make it to 1400. I don't want to be eating when I'm not hungry, but I also don't want to eat too few calories that my metabolism slows. Any suggestions on what I need to change or what to do? Or is it even a big deal?

    Prior to this eating change I have made we pretty much lived on fast food junk, so when I saw how many calories I was eating that way I thought I'd never be able to stay under 1400. I never thought I'd have the opposite problem. This has gone on for 3-4 days, with different food combinations. I really want to be successful here. I've lost about 6 lbs this first week, which I'm sure is just mostly water, and I'm in it for the long haul....I don't want to do any type of crash high speed diet. Please help.
  • TinaS88
    TinaS88 Posts: 817 Member
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    delete them, and move on. it too drives me crazy- all the threads too about 1200 cals etc....


    MFP set me at only 1330 if I don't exercise. People have different activity levels. Like me, I am typically sitting in front of a computer all day so I am not burning as much calories as say a policeman would...lol. If I exercise, sometimes I will eat them back if I am legit hungry. Everyone is different and burns and loses in different ways.
  • misssiri
    misssiri Posts: 335 Member
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    Your metabolism is already slow or your wouldn't be full at 1000 calories per day. Eat more. My oatmeal is 150 calories and I put a tablespoon of peanut butter in it. Don't eat low fat anything, eat some avocados, more nuts, oil, fattier foods that are higher in calories. Fat is good for you and so are calories.
  • TinaS88
    TinaS88 Posts: 817 Member
    Options
    Hi everyone, I'm new to all of this calorie counting stuff but I'm having a bit of a problem. Actually an opposite problem from what I thought I'd have. I log everything that goes into my mouth, and MFP gave me a goal intake of 1400 per day. As dumb as this sounds, I'm having a really hard time meeting this goal. I come in around 1000 per day, and often find days that I go drink a glass of milk or eat something when I really am not hungry just to be over 1200. I read somewhere that under 1200 was not good. I feel like I eat a lot. For example, today I had one packet of 100 cal oatmeal for breakfast and 2 Tbsp of half and half in my coffee, a banana a couple hours later. Then a frozen lean cuisine for lunch. Then a fiber one bar. For dinner I had baked potatoes, 4 oz of roast beef, and carrots. This all came in at about 998 for the whole day. I ate a pb&j 2 hours after dinner just to make it to 1400. I don't want to be eating when I'm not hungry, but I also don't want to eat too few calories that my metabolism slows. Any suggestions on what I need to change or what to do? Or is it even a big deal?

    Prior to this eating change I have made we pretty much lived on fast food junk, so when I saw how many calories I was eating that way I thought I'd never be able to stay under 1400. I never thought I'd have the opposite problem. This has gone on for 3-4 days, with different food combinations. I really want to be successful here. I've lost about 6 lbs this first week, which I'm sure is just mostly water, and I'm in it for the long haul....I don't want to do any type of crash high speed diet. Please help.

    If you feel okay, are drinking your water and seriously aren't hungry I don't think forcing yourself to eat is good. If you could go for a snack or small meal, cheese is always great for me to get the cals up. You are just starting out so you just have to find your grove and see what works best for you. Keep it simple. When it gets all deep, people are more likely to fall off. Learn as you go.

    My motto is: If I have the extra cals and I am hungry, then I eat... if I am not hungry or don't have the cals, then I don't.
  • KaitDW
    KaitDW Posts: 21 Member
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    I agree. Add some fat to your diet. Nuts, almond butter... and it doesn't look like youre getting that much protein. If necessary eat six smaller meals. Feel free to add me if you want to chat more. :)
  • cordianet
    cordianet Posts: 534 Member
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    I delete them. Like you I can't stand to see that, so I give them a few days to do better, tell them why they can't continue that way, and then if they continue to starve themselves... DELETE. If they won't listen, I'm not going to help enable their eating disorder.

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