Working out with an anxiety disorder ... and no space.
superjolin
Posts: 1
Someone said this was a good, supportive place to go. I'm hoping that's true. So, here goes.
I'm a college student. I live in a very small dorm that's shared with three other girls, so space is at a premium. It is nearly impossible to actually work out in the dorm. I have tried, I have injured myself grievously, and I have stopped. It just isn't working there.
But the real kicker is the problem that keeps me from going elsewhere.
I have a major (social) anxiety disorder.
I cannot go to a gym without inducing a panic attack. I cannot go running in public without being so uncomfortable I immediately turn back. I fear judgement more than I fear death and that is not hyperbole. It does not matter if "no one is really judging me," I assume they are and it launches me right off the deep end. I cannot work out in front of people. I cannot make friends to work out with -- I can't make friends in general.
I have moved away from drug therapy for this problem (a major cause of the weight gain I'm trying to undo) and see a therapist regularly but haven't been able to move past this.
Is there even a point? Should I bother? Can't do it at home, can't do it outside. Am I kidding myself?
Please don't just say "get over it" or "no one is really even paying attention to you." The former is patently unhelpful in just about every context and the latter I know is logically true, but nothing is logical in the middle of a panic attack.
I'm a college student. I live in a very small dorm that's shared with three other girls, so space is at a premium. It is nearly impossible to actually work out in the dorm. I have tried, I have injured myself grievously, and I have stopped. It just isn't working there.
But the real kicker is the problem that keeps me from going elsewhere.
I have a major (social) anxiety disorder.
I cannot go to a gym without inducing a panic attack. I cannot go running in public without being so uncomfortable I immediately turn back. I fear judgement more than I fear death and that is not hyperbole. It does not matter if "no one is really judging me," I assume they are and it launches me right off the deep end. I cannot work out in front of people. I cannot make friends to work out with -- I can't make friends in general.
I have moved away from drug therapy for this problem (a major cause of the weight gain I'm trying to undo) and see a therapist regularly but haven't been able to move past this.
Is there even a point? Should I bother? Can't do it at home, can't do it outside. Am I kidding myself?
Please don't just say "get over it" or "no one is really even paying attention to you." The former is patently unhelpful in just about every context and the latter I know is logically true, but nothing is logical in the middle of a panic attack.
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Replies
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Dang that's rough. I don't have anything diagnosed, but I get pretty weird about being outside sometimes. I live in the city which I like for the most part. Sometimes on the subway I start to get overwhelmed if there are too many people or if there are a lot of people looking at me. I HATE going to the gym so I do my workouts at home. Maybe you can work out outside somewhere? Even just taking a walk in the park can be good therapy. Hiking is pretty much a solitary activity. Or you could run up and down stairwells? If there's a big building you could use the higher levels like the 20th-25th floor because no one ever uses those.0
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I experience paranoia as part of my mental disorder, so I understand how leaving the house can be near impossible sometimes.
You could try getting in more exercise when you are already out of the house when you are able. If you walk to class, loop around the building a couple of times. Take the stairs, as the other poster suggested. Park your vehicle out further. I know it doesn't sound like much but it does add up.
And if worse come to worse, you can lose weight without exercise. Figure out a calorie count that will compensate for not exercising. You can do that, too.0 -
Wow, you just described me to a T . *hugz*0
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Maybe try to find a 24 hour gym and go there when it's the least busiest???0
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I used to live in a tiny dorm, and I did find some simple things I could do with very little space. There's a pilates video I used to have that I only needed a strip of floor about the size of a towel. It's low impact, no jumping around or anything so you are less likely to injure yourself is a space-related way.
Walking the long way to class, if you walk to class, and going up and down stairs is good. Some buildings on my campus are open late or on weekends and no one is ever in the stairwell.
I second quirkytizzy on the losing weight without exercise. If you stay within your calories that is completely possible. You may lose muscle or not be "toned" but if weight is your primary concern healthy eating at a calorie deficit is more important than exercise anyway.0 -
I have a fairly severe anxiety disorder and have only recently gained any control. Can you find an empty classroom on campus? Or perhaps a study room at the library? There are plenty of empty rooms at a university; you just have to get creative.
More importantly, though - I can tell you that it is possible to overcome your anxiety. Maybe not entirely, but to the point that you are no longer jumping out of your skin with racing thoughts and insecurities. Yoga is what helped me the most. I learned to relax, to let my brain just empty itself, to focus on my breathing and nothing more. I heavily suggest that you give it a try. I'm not great at yoga, and I have to modify a lot of the poses. But it has helped me so much mentally.
Best of luck to you.0 -
My daughter has had anxiety "panic attacks" since the age of 9. She is now 32 - with her Masters in Communication Disorders. Here are a few things I have suggested to her. Listen to music whenever you work out - it's the age of portable music. This helps distract the mind somewhat. If you live in a large enough city, there should be a gym that is open 24/7 - find a time that there aren't as many people there. I loved the idea of using the stairs in a stairwell as posted earlier. Get up early - try jogging/walking before anyone else is up. Hang in there young lady.0
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What type of working out have you tried in the dorm? Are there a lot of stairs that you could climb (good for cardio). Have you tried body-weight strength exercises - these require no more space than your body, really. There are lots of yoga videos on youtube that would provide good exercise, without requiring a lot of space or jumping around (and bumping into things).
I suffer from an anxiety disorder, and while it's not as severe as what you describe, I do sympathize.0 -
Panic attacks just flat out suck! ((hugs))
I'm not sure what you're trying to do in a small space, but I have a walking DVD from Leslie Sansone that probably uses about three square feet of space total to do. I use it in my bedroom - where there isn't a lot of space. She has a 1 mile and 2 mile one. Its walking in place!
Also, I love the ideas of the stairs and was going to ask if you have stairs in your dorm you could just walk up and down a couple times a day?
Do you go to the mall at all? Not sure about social anxiety - my attacks are triggered by something else - so wasn't sure if shopping in an open air mall would help. Start at one end and walk to the other.
Good luck!0 -
I don't really understand the psychology of your problem, but just want to wish you the best of luck in finding a solution because I'm sure working out and improving your fitness will help in a big way with the issue.0
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From my own experience, headphones help. Go run/walk, keep the same route every day and just force yourself. It will get easier if you have a routine. Also, try getting out very early when very few people are around.0
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You could always do stuff that doesn't "look" like a workout. Go for long walks outside or go swimming in the pool. Like other people said climb stairs or do extra laps around buildings on the way to class or back home.
You can always lose weight without workout out, but its best to get moving a little at least.
Good luck!0 -
I have anxiety and depression and the only thing that works for me is forcing myself through it. Yeah, it's hard, but I'd rather suffer by pushing myself out of my comfort zone that suffer within it. And the physical release helps with the emotional feelings, so it's win-win. Plus, I wear sunglasses and earbuds to help me tune out the world. Makes me feel less visible.
And it's true there's no logic in a panic attack, but that itself is one thing that's helped me with them. If I keep telling myself "it's just your anxiety talking, there's no real danger," I can "talk myself down" from it.0 -
Pushups and squats don't require you moving from point to point. And if cardio is what you need, then buy a stationary peddler (Marcy makes a pretty good one). They are a little bigger than a microwave, but you can do it in your dorm.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
I would suggest seeing about being medicated if that's an avenue you haven't already tried. Such a debilitating anxiety leads to a poor quality of life, and so it's really important you focus on your mental health.
Your fitness will be difficult to do anything about if you are unable to go outside or go to a gym, so I would focus first on nutritional health. Work on calorie intake and eating clean - simple things like these can also sometimes alleviate symptoms of anxieties and depression.
Feel free to add me! I'm a first year psych student (so obviously I know all the things!... jk), but I'd be more than happy to share whatever I learn with you that might help.0 -
I completely feel for you--my anxiety stopped me from going to the gym for about 8 months, even though I was paying, because I had one bad experience. Since then, I've switched gyms and have started going regularly again. I can't believe someone would tell you to "just get over it;" how horrible and insensitive. But the truth of the matter is nobody understands until they've been there.
My suggestion? If you can, find a building with a fireproof stairwell (you know the kind, where there are big wooden doors that lead to concrete-walled stairs that run the height of the building) and start there. If you can't go outside, and you can't go to the gym, that seems like it would be fairly private, but that depends on you and what you're comfortable with. Another thing to try is possibly hiking (if you have woodsy areas near you). You don't have to "look" like you're "working out"--and if you have a camera, you can go on the premise of taking nature photos.
I hope something works out for you! Feel free to add me or message me if you ever need encouragement.0 -
See if there is an empty dorm room and if they will let you use it, it would be enough room to workout and no one would be there. I would bet something could be worked out, maybe have your therapist contact the RA at your dorm for some help. I know something could be worked out with your attacks being so bad, and it might help your progress.0
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go at odd hours....... When I lived in a dorm I was actively taking Tae Kwon Do, with no space there was no where to practice. I would go to the local park on campus at like 11-2am there was never anyone there so I had all the space in the world with no one to watch. There were a few people but when its dark they can't see you right0
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I would start slow. Like PP suggested, take the long way to class and walk like you are running late. Find some work out clothes you feel good in and wear them often enough that you don't feel "different" in them (it helps to not feel like you are standing out when you are wearing them in public). At home, do push-ups and planks and bodyweight squats (working up to a kettlebel to add weight to squats and lunges). There is no bopping about with those exercises but they are very effective. I use a gymboss timer (~$25 on Amazon) and do intervals for 45 minutes. It definitely gets my heart rate up. Eventually you could try going outside in the early morning before anyone is up and jumping rope for a few minutes near your dorm (that way you don't have to worry about safety re: jogging alone in the dark). Eat at a calorie deficit, but not one that is too large because it can affect your mood (consider TDEE-10%).
I have anxiety, too. It sucks, but healthy eating and healthy weight loss and improving my fitness has drastically improved my anxiety!0 -
I have anxiety and depression and the only thing that works for me is forcing myself through it. Yeah, it's hard, but I'd rather suffer by pushing myself out of my comfort zone that suffer within it. And the physical release helps with the emotional feelings, so it's win-win. Plus, I wear sunglasses and earbuds to help me tune out the world. Makes me feel less visible.
And it's true there's no logic in a panic attack, but that itself is one thing that's helped me with them. If I keep telling myself "it's just your anxiety talking, there's no real danger," I can "talk myself down" from it.
You're completely right. But it does take time to get to the point where you can talk yourself down from a panic attack. They are illogical and if you're new at dealing with them, they're too crippling to even tell yourself nothing is wrong.
Also, I just want to say that I'm proud of you for pushing your comfort limits to better yourself.0 -
Add me if you like. I am a chronic anxiety sufferer0
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I would suggest seeing about being medicated if that's an avenue you haven't already tried. Such a debilitating anxiety leads to a poor quality of life, and so it's really important you focus on your mental health.
Your fitness will be difficult to do anything about if you are unable to go outside or go to a gym, so I would focus first on nutritional health. Work on calorie intake and eating clean - simple things like these can also sometimes alleviate symptoms of anxieties and depression.
Feel free to add me! I'm a first year psych student (so obviously I know all the things!... jk), but I'd be more than happy to share whatever I learn with you that might help.
I wanted to amend my post - I saw belatedly that you've given up on the drugs. Even though they are a part of your weight gain, your doctor or psychiatrist might be able to prescribe a different brand or dosage with less severe side-effects. There are lots of different kinds!
On top of that, definitely find forums or even people on here who share the same anxieties - they'll be the ones who can offer the best suggestions, as they know where you've been.0 -
This is from NerdFitness.com. It is called the 20min hotel room workout. Take a look and see if this could help you in your dorm.
http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2010/12/20/the-20-minute-hotel-workout/0 -
First of all, anxiety attacks suck big time, and find it really commendable your wanting to work though/around this. The stairs are a brilliant idea. No idea what your uni is like, but considering your counsellor it may be possible to see if the uni is willing to lend an empty classroom for you to work. You'd be surprised how understanding and accommodating unis can be. Hope you find something that's works for you and good luck.0
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Yeah, I relate so bad to this.
I honestly just walked a lot more. It didn't look like I was trying to exercise purposefully, which I feared people would make judgements about. A lot of the time if I'm watching TV or something I just walk back and forth in my room, though I still get nervous that people can hear me moving about.0 -
have your therapist contact your RA and see if there is an empty dorm room or any other room that can be locked from the inside that you can use for specified periods of time...then you can go in, lock the door, and get your fitness on!0
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you could get up really early in the morning and go for a walk or run when there is no-one else about. I go for runs really early 6.00 am and I have never seen anyone else about. Or like others have said body weight exercises don't require much space neither does working out with dumb bells.
I am sure when you start exercising regularly it will have a positive effect to your whole mind and body, good luck:)0 -
I'm sorry you have to go through this everyday, I'm sure it makes life very difficult
Some suggestions: Have you thought about running outside early in the morning? There won't be as many people around and depending on the town you live in, you might not see any one! If you are self conscious, maybe try walking the routes you are planning on running to find the best route with the least amount of traffic?
Do your roommates know about your anxiety? if they know and are understanding then perhaps they could agree to leave the dorm for an hour each day to allow you to exercise alone?
Also, if you call or email your local gym they may be able to help suggest some times that the gym has no members. For example some gyms could be dead at 10 am, but extremely busy at 11:30am. Knowing what times they are busy will allow you to avoid it during those times so hopefully avoid an anxiety attack.
Best of luck!!0 -
I, too, suffer from anxiety (PTSD, OCD, GAD, and Agorophobia) as well as chronic depression. I have also tried multiple meds and have had severe complications from them all, including increased suicidal ideation. I'm currently doing the therapy without the meds and focusing on CBT with some ERP. It does help, but it is a long, slow battle and definitely hard work.
I agree with an earlier post that mentioned yoga. That has been a huge help to me on some of my most anxious days. I love Ashley Turner's DVD by Element ("Yoga for Stress Relief and Flexibility). It definitely helps calm the anxiety and build mindfulness, which is critical when dealing with an anxiety disorder as it helps fight both the autopilot and the hyperarousal/hypervigilance.
As far as cardio and strength training, I use a set of hand weights and do simple strength training with those as well as basic body resistance. I only need a small area large enough for my body to lie on the floor. For cardio, I use a recumbent bike, but I understand that you probably don't have access to one. I agree with others who say that you may be able to use the stairwell or possibly an empty lounge or classroom if you can find a faculty member or RA who you trust who can help you out. the cardio helps with the depression and sometimes with the anxiety, but other times, the extra burst of energy I get from the cardio can actually amp up the anxiety if it's already bad. Just be prepared for that and try to remind yourself so that you're not alarmed by it. It will pass.
I've also found that diet helps a lot. I've added B complex to help with mood stability. Increasing my protein has also helped to balance my mood to some extent (as it helps to keep more stable blood sugar levels.
Wishing you the best of luck in whatever you try, and reminding you that whatever you try, even if it doesn't work out for whatever reason, is a step in the right direction as it lets you know what works and what doesn't which helps to pinpoint a route that works for you.0 -
I have a fairly severe anxiety disorder and have only recently gained any control. Can you find an empty classroom on campus? Or perhaps a study room at the library? There are plenty of empty rooms at a university; you just have to get creative.
More importantly, though - I can tell you that it is possible to overcome your anxiety. Maybe not entirely, but to the point that you are no longer jumping out of your skin with racing thoughts and insecurities. Yoga is what helped me the most. I learned to relax, to let my brain just empty itself, to focus on my breathing and nothing more. I heavily suggest that you give it a try. I'm not great at yoga, and I have to modify a lot of the poses. But it has helped me so much mentally.
Best of luck to you.
OH this would be excellent as well!! My campus always had empty rooms especially during the evenings. If you are able to email student services perhaps they could help you to find a room? The campus enforcement would just need to leave the door unlocked and you'd be set. You could even simply call them or email them once you are done to ask them to lock it up again, that way you have privacy and would not even have to see them0
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