single parents, how do you balance it all??

4themoney · May 2013

ie. work, kids, home, pets, exercise, etc......

to start with, I am a single parent to 5 kids, so i live life by scheduling us down to the minute. i was doing GREAT until i started a job 5 weeks ago............. i haven't really done any working out since then. :-( nothing i would calling "working out" at least............

Normally, I would go to the gym daily while my youngest two were in preschool, well, now i'm at work. And once I get home all of the kids come home from school and we get caught up in all of the other stuff going on in our lives.

I'm exhausted come 8p and there is no energy or motivation to work out :-( I could wake up earlier than I do now, but once I"m up the three dogs are up and I have to deal with them, LOL!

this is a very new thing for me. i have two gym memberships ( to make sure i always had a place i could run to for a work out!! LOL!) and i haven't worked in 11 years! i'm actually thinking of quitting the job so i can go back to my regularly scheduled program!! hahaha! but, i figured i would ask here first. see if people had any thoughts, ideas, suggestions.

i CAN do some stuff from home. not a ton, but enough! i guess it's finding the time/ motivation because of my new schedule/ hours. i welcome all thoughts, ideas and suggestions!!! basically, i am not looking at STARTING something, i'm just looking for how to acclimate myself, and my schedule, to a change like working :-)

Thanks!!!

boberrymom · May 2013

Alot of non-single parents struggle with this too so you aren't alone.
Do you get a lunch break? Have you considered using your lunch break to go to the gym? Maybe take a walk? You can even set up a routine in your office for little workouts, like squats at your desk or lunges things like that. Take your kids for a walk. I have 4 kids and it can be harrowing trying to juggle everything in the house it seems at once, what parent in their right mind has time to do something for themselves?!
We as parents surround ourself with guilt when we think about doing something for ourselves and when we do have time from busy schedules we are just exhausted. You say you schedule your family to the minute? So why can't you schedule two 15 minute sessions for you? Get the kids working out with you, go play outside. Leave the homework for an hour and go and play, you will feel so much better, your kids will feel better, and you will get your exercise in without even thinking about it. Invest in a crockpot and plan meals ahead, get the kids helping with this. My kids love to cook and help in the kitchen. It takes a little extra to plan ahead at first but before long its nothing and it will be so much easier on you and the kids won't have a stressed out momma.

I really hope this helps. If all else fails and you are feeling at the end of your rope, get your kids pitching in totally. Explain to them that you need their help so you don't get overwhelmed. No doubt at least the older ones will be more than willing to help out.

Jess

usmcmp · May 2013

I workout on my lunch hour and do some sort of cardio after the kids go to bed (jump rope on the patio). We also go for walks and hikes together. I do take an hour on the weekend to lift, but I'm happier after which means we have a better weekend as a family. I've also managed to train for and compete in a bodybuilding competition. Doing my second one in October. Food prep gets done Saturday and Sunday night after the kids are in bed. Makes the week smoother for all of us.

artex1024 · May 2013

I'm a single mom, but only to one kid. I can't imagine having 5! I don't have a gym membership because there's literally no one to watch my daughter and our small-town gym doesn't have a daycare, so I rely on things I can do from home. We go on lots of walks, and we go for longer ones on my days off. If I have to motivation, I do body weight exercises during the rare times that I watch tv, or we play Just Dance. I don't worry about strength training because I work as a stocker, so I do a lot of lifting and physical work on the job. Are any of your kids old enough to be able to watch the younger ones so you can work out?

coe28 · May 2013

My situation isn't nearly as hectic as yours, but I am a single mom and I work a full and part-time job and have a 3 year old son. It is definitely difficult to find "me time" being a single parent, but you HAVE to do it, for yourself AND for your kids.

When I'm at work (desk job) I get in whatever exercise I possible can. I consolidate my breaks so that I can walk to the post office and back (1 mile each way). Sidewalk needs shoveled? I'll do it! Two minutes of jumping jacks in the bathroom a few times a day? Yep! I usually don't get any more workout time until after my son goes to bed. Then I hit my elliptical or do Zumba on the Wii or something. It's not ideal and I wish I could do more, but at this point it's something, and that's better than nothing

ks4e · May 2013

I'm not a single mom but my husband works nights while I work days, so I am home alone with our 2 kids when I do get home. I either wake up super early to exercise for half an hour, go for walks during lunch (this has been difficult lately since I pump during my lunch breaks), or I will ask friends and family to watch the kids for half an hour so I can exercise. I am currently doing C25K and Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred, along with other work outs when I can.

Does your gym have daycare? Utilize it if you can.

How old are your kids? Can they help out with the cleaning at home?

Prepare meals the night before, or invest in a good crock pot!

Have you heard of FlyLady? It has the info you need to help stay clean and organized in a short matter of time.

Snatched614 · May 2013

I too am a single mom of three ages 19, 9, and 12. We have a full schedule as well and I work an 8hr job. So here's what our schdule looks like:

MWF-- Mom takes Bootcamp 6-7AM 7-8PM (Beginners Weight Training)
Tues and Thurs. Kids have swim class (7:30-8:10) We don't get in until 9PM
Saturday-- Rollerskating Lessons (leave home 7AM to drop off oldest at school and 10:30AM are skate lessons)
I still have chores and Sunday's are mom's REST day. A majority of my exercises are done during the week. I've invested in a treadmill which sits in my livingroom, so I can catch up on whatever show's I may have on DVR. And I still manage to put in a chore or two as well. So it can be done. Not sure the ages of the kids, but they can help one another out as well. But this is an investment in you and your kids... make time for it. You'll be GLAD u did!!!

Good Luck on your Journey!!!

Snatched

coe28 · May 2013

Food prep gets done Saturday and Sunday night after the kids are in bed. Makes the week smoother for all of us.

This too. Planning your meals ahead of time make evenings so much easier. I don't get home until almost 6 (and only have about 2 hours to do dinner, bath and play with my son before his bedtime) so when I know what we're having and have it ready to make, it saves a lot of time and hassle!

BeinAwesome247 · May 2013

I'm a single mom, but only to one kid. I can't imagine having 5! I don't have a gym membership because there's literally no one to watch my daughter and our small-town gym doesn't have a daycare, so I rely on things I can do from home. We go on lots of walks, and we go for longer ones on my days off. If I have to motivation, I do body weight exercises during the rare times that I watch tv, or we play Just Dance. I don't worry about strength training because I work as a stocker, so I do a lot of lifting and physical work on the job. Are any of your kids old enough to be able to watch the younger ones so you can work out?

This would be my thoughts

Shaunte86 · May 2013

I am a single parent to only 1 child (5 years old). I am a high school teacher and am a graduate student just finished my masters degree now going for my doctorate. Currently I have been working out about 5 days per week. It is a struggle however there are a few things that I do to help balance the hectic-ness that goes on:

--Saturday early morning grocery shopping, before it gets crowded
--Sunday meal prep day, for the week
--Calendar all events

After I put my son to bed, I do my school work. I try not to bring work home such as grading, lesson planning, etc. At the gym I go to they have kids club, my son has his membership to kids club while I work out. Our dinners are already prepared so its quick to heat up the food and eat either before or after the gym. I also take my son and our dog to the park which is huge, while they run around and play I run, and use the playground equipment to work out as well. My son loves to workout with me doing squats, crunches, plank, etc. This makes it fun family time and a workout...best of both worlds. Home workout videos are also a good way to sneak a workout in possibly before you wake your kids in the morning?

It is very challenging, but doable...I guess thats where the "supermom" title comes from!

Mongand · May 2013

Interesting, because my own mother was in the exact same position as you almost 40 years ago. She didn't have prepared packaged foods, or a washing machine, and had to take the bus to work (a 40 minute trip each way) five days a week. She was a saint among common folk, who left us far too soon. I had the same problem as you when my wife left me and I had two kids, two dogs, my own more-than-fulltime job.
There are a lot of great ideas in this thread already, but I would add involve your kids in something too. Walk the dogs together; clean the house together; start a garden together. Use the older kids (it teaches responsibility) when they can handle it, and share your own chores with them. My mother rotated chores so that we weren't bored, and often did chores with one of us at a time just to find time to talk to one of us while the others were busy.
That being said, planning and scheduling are the key to "me time." I found I had a lot of missing time when I looked at my own schedule. Dinner's over and watch tv before the dishes? Why not share the dishes with one or two of the kids, skip the tv, assign bath monitors, and go for a walk a couple times a week?
Good luck

djeffreys10 · May 2013

I am a single dad raising two kids. I fit my workout in by eating lunch at my desk, then taking my lunch hour at the gym every day (5x per week). Plus I am a contractor, so I am not really on the clock anyway. Just gotta get my time in every month. My kids ride the bus to my parents house after school, and they always eat there before I pick them up (6-6:30 in the evening) and get their homework finished. So when I get home, I get me a quick meal (some meat on the grill and a salad or sweet potato, etc) and make enough for my lunch the next day at work. It is hectic, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Snatched614 · May 2013

Duh... jumping rope on the balcony, thanks for that tidbit...

I workout on my lunch hour and do some sort of cardio after the kids go to bed (jump rope on the patio). We also go for walks and hikes together. I do take an hour on the weekend to lift, but I'm happier after which means we have a better weekend as a family. I've also managed to train for and compete in a bodybuilding competition. Doing my second one in October. Food prep gets done Saturday and Sunday night after the kids are in bed. Makes the week smoother for all of us.

4themoney · May 2013

these are some really great ideas! thanks :-)

i don't get a lunch break and the kids and i are pretty much on the same schedule so no time alone in the mornings, afternoons, or evenings, LOL!

i am kid free every other weekend, and usually work out then anyway. its just a matter of finding the time and motivation though. i think i need to just get back to the basics. my kids do love doing squats and planks with me. i need to restart taking them up to the park and then running laps while they play. we used to do that ALLLLL the time.

thank you all!!!

geekgirl_2012 · May 2013

I suppose I should start by saying that I'm not a single parent. But, I still struggle with obtaining the balance, so I thought I'd chime in.

I have a gym membership, but I personally cannot find the time to go to the gym. The extra 15 minutes it takes to drive there and change clothes is lost time. What's starting to work for me is a combination of the following. I'm always looking for new things I can incorporate. Some of these things seem a bit ridiculous, but it's working for me.

1. Get up 30 minutes earlier to do something... anything: stretch, crunches, pushups, lunges, plank, etc. Honestly, this doesn't happen all that often. But, I try for this.
2. While at home, walk around. Take extra steps when putting laundry away, walk up and down the hall a few times, all extra steps add up.
3. Eat lunch at my desk so I can go out for a walk during lunch.
4. Whenever I am near stairs, I take them... even if I don't need to go up/down stairs.
5. When I hang out with my daughter while she's brushing her teeth, bathing, or whatever, I do dips or pushups using the countertop.
6. I play with my daughter by running around and tumbling around with her. I also lift her a lot.
7. I try to do squats when brushing my teeth.

It's a tough gig at times. Hang in there and good luck!

4themoney · May 2013

I'm not a single mom but my husband works nights while I work days, so I am home alone with our 2 kids when I do get home. I either wake up super early to exercise for half an hour, go for walks during lunch (this has been difficult lately since I pump during my lunch breaks), or I will ask friends and family to watch the kids for half an hour so I can exercise. I am currently doing C25K and Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred, along with other work outs when I can.

Does your gym have daycare? Utilize it if you can.

How old are your kids? Can they help out with the cleaning at home?

Prepare meals the night before, or invest in a good crock pot!

Have you heard of FlyLady? It has the info you need to help stay clean and organized in a short matter of time.

Hi!

i belong to two gyms, one does have child care included ( 40 min drive each way though) and the other has it at certain hours, but NOT included. this is the gym i would usually go to because it's closer to my house and i'd go when everyone was in school. not sure either are great choices if i'm going to work........

oh my kids help with chores ;-) all of them!!! l do have to oversee them, and still do the bulk of the "grown up" work. but, they help a TON. i have 5 kids, 3 dogs, 1 cat, 2 bunnies, chickens, ducks, and baby chicks. not to mention all of the indoor chores and stuff like yard work, LOL!

the only thing i haven't done much of is food prep ahead of time. i could look into doing that kind of stuff on sunday nights. i am mainly cooking for 5 kids that aren't impressed by "fancy" meals, so our meals are pretty low key..... they'd be easy to do ahead of time i think.

and yeah, i'm already the master list maker, it's the 'doing it all' and getting it all checked off the list that's a challenge ;-)

for example, last night i took the kids to tae kwon do from 430-630, and while they were in class i did work for MY job, two birds, one stone! then, i took them out to dinner, then home (745) for chicken chores and 30 min of brushing my great pyrenees.... he needed it! that was kinda like a work out though!!! LOL! THEN i got to deal with the kitchen and bedtime (ended up being 900), and by the time i was done it was 930 and i was beat. took the puppies out twice and sprinted up the hill back to our house and then i crashed (1030).

i guess i figured by 5-6 weeks in, i'd have settled into a new routine, that still included my work outs. i guess i'll have to mess with things a little bit more :-)

thanks, again!

learnerdriver · May 2013

thanks, I will be returning to full time work.

single parents, how do you balance it all??

Replies

Categories