HELP

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leelee429
leelee429 Posts: 8
in Motivation and Support
For starters I've never told anyone this, I'm just looking for a little support and maybe some advice. So I just started this weightloss kick a little over a week ago, I've already lost 5 lbs. The thing is, I know I'm not overweight, far from it. I'm 27, 5'2 and I weigh appx 122 lbs. I have a 2 year old daughter and ever since I gave birth I've found it hard to lose the extra weight I've put on. Pre-baby I weighed around 110, and that's what I would like to get back to, but even then I still never looked at myself and thought I looked really good. I feel like I may be getting a little obsessed with it, more so now. MFP has given me the 1200 calorie goal and I am able to meet it just fine, but I don't like to allow myself to go over, even the slightest amount and I feel really bad when I do and I just feel like I'm just constantly counting calories. I don't have a lot of time to work out but I do occassionally. I still just don't know if after I get to the target weight if I will be satisfied. I've never had an eating disorder or anything like that, I know that's what a lot of people will think when they read, this, I love food, maybe that's the problem. It's mainly just mental and I beat myself up over it. I just feel as if I am fighting a losing battle sometimes and I feel even more dumb when people ask me "why are you trying to lose weight, you're not even fat", I KNOW THAT, but I'm just not satisfied. I'm not that girl that's saying "oh I'm fat, and I need attention" it's quite the opposite, I don't want attention about it. Does anyone else ever feel this way or have any advice they can give?

Replies

  • kimjoan
    kimjoan Posts: 192 Member
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    Your height and weight equals a BMI of about 22.5 - which is more than in the healthly range.

    Are you eating right? Are you exercising? Are your blood pressure and sugars okay? How about other things like cholesterol? Is your waist size no more that half of your height (ie - you are 62 inclues tall so your waist size should be no bigger than 31). If your answers to all of these questions are "Yes" then you are very healthy and should be "watching" your weight not borderline obsessing over it.

    I have a really bad history with food. As a child I was plump, then borderline obese in high school. I became aneroxic in senior year and am still alive because of a very alert drill sergeant. Then I went back to old habits to the point that I ate myself up to 333 pounds, diabetes and high blood pressure by the age of 40. At that point I had to look at the big picture and figure out why I was beating myself up with food. I am 47 now, 189 and have 14 pound to go to hit my goal. But I know that the only reason I have been successful without going back to any obsessive behavior is because I got to the root of my relationship with food and my body. Hope this is helpful - good luck.
  • 1Steph1
    1Steph1 Posts: 145
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    Hi! You should not focus so much on the scale, try taking measurments also. Weight is a tricky one and its not very accurate, I use it mostly as a guideline and try not to get too obsessed with it. Since I do a lot of strength training I gain muscle and that sometimes causes me to even gain weight, but I dont gain any inches, so I know im not getting bigger, Just stronger. Have you ever considered strength training? Since you are already on the smaller side it would help to tone you up and lose a some fat..if thats what you want :) Weight training was never something I thought I would do but its done so much for me and I love it now. I did a three month program (Chalean Extreme) which consisted of mainly doing the weights, and some cardio, and I lost 12.5 lbs and 10.5 inches from it! :) Ive never been happier with my body, tho I am not finished yet, but I was so happy with the results :) Just putting that out there in case its something you want to try. Also I wouldnt be so concerned with calories. Its good not to go over all the time, but a few wont kill you, and keep in mind if your active during the day you earn extra calories. When I workout I use a heart rate monitor which tells me approx how many cals I burn during a workout, and then I add my workout on here and I earn extra cals :)
  • sngnyrslp
    sngnyrslp Posts: 315 Member
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    I feel EXACTLY the same way. Sometimes I worry that I spend a little too much time and effort paying attention to calories and it's occasionally really upsetting because I love food so much and some days I just want to throw healthy eating out the window and go crazy. I'm also not overweight at all and I'm constantly hearing people tell me to stop worrying but I don't like where I am with my body. I also fear that, despite exercise and calorie counting, maybe I never will be all that happy about my body. I've recently decided to shift my focus from weight loss to toning, because I don't think I'm fat but I do think I'm a little "jiggly."
    I don't really have much advice for you (sorry), except maybe to reevaluate what you don't like about your body and the best way to go about improving it. Aside from that, I can only say you're not alone!
  • sngnyrslp
    sngnyrslp Posts: 315 Member
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    Whoops double post!
  • LittlePam
    LittlePam Posts: 40
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    I'd say you are moving in the right direction. You realize there could be an issue and you know to keep an eye on it. I think because of those 2 things alone you will never have a "problem". For a small frame 5' 22" woman the recommended weight is 108-121. So for anyone that tells you you are not fat tell them no I'm not fat but I am overweight. Then you won't feel so "dumb" as you said.

    Your doing a good thing... The first week will always have a bigger weight drop so don't be disappointed if you don't see that much in the next week but you will do it.

    Good luck!
  • leelee429
    leelee429 Posts: 8
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    I would like to get more toned and I think it would help if I did, but with work and being a single mother, it's not easy to find the time to do anything, I am trying though :smile: .
  • leelee429
    leelee429 Posts: 8
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    Thanks for the posts everyone, every little bit helps!
  • themyriadthings
    themyriadthings Posts: 225 Member
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    I don't have any advice, but I can relate to your feeling of discord with your body. Lately I've been making progress at working with my body instead of against it, and treating it as a friend instead of an enemy. In short I'm trying to be kinder to myself, and part of that kindness is to accept my body how it is at every step along my journey to better health. It sounds kind of corny I guess, but this change of perspective has really helped me obsess less about all sorts of things. :flowerforyou:
  • tiffanygil
    tiffanygil Posts: 478 Member
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    If you dont love yourself now you will not - 5 -10 - 20 lbs from now. Trust me on this I learned the hard way. Start working on the negativity and guilt now. No, your not over weight or fat now but if you are an emotional eater having these emotions could lead to overeating which in 5, 10 years from now might make you even heavier.

    Take time to love yourself. You were created for a purpose and I believe a plan. Focus on getting "healthy" not loosing weight especially since you have a baby that loves you and needs you to be "healthy" not skinny =)

    lots of love
    Tiff
  • leelee429
    leelee429 Posts: 8
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    If you dont love yourself now you will not - 5 -10 - 20 lbs from now. Trust me on this I learned the hard way. Start working on the negativity and guilt now. No, your not over weight or fat now but if you are an emotional eater having these emotions could lead to overeating which in 5, 10 years from now might make you even heavier.

    Take time to love yourself. You were created for a purpose and I believe a plan. Focus on getting "healthy" not loosing weight especially since you have a baby that loves you and needs you to be "healthy" not skinny =)

    lots of love
    Tiff

    Thanks I couldn't agree more, I'm working on this and I will overcome it for my daughter and for me!
  • xarrium
    xarrium Posts: 432 Member
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    I think you just described me... I've never really been happy with how I look--I was never really "fat", but of all my friends growing up I was the biggest (and by default became the fat kid), and I've become kind of antisocial because I'm constantly thinking about how I look compared to everyone else even when there's nobody around to impress... which in turn reinforces the negativity because nobody likes being stuck with an introvert (ie. me).

    I also have the obsession with calories--at one point I forced myself to take a break from MFP for a week to show myself that not logging every last calorie wouldn't completely destroy my progress, and I ended up continuing to lose because I've become more in-tune with what's good for me (and I think the extra calories helped me do better in my workouts, which I didn't stop during the break). Now I've just set my calorie goal to maintainance, and if I happen to keep losing that's awesome but I'm going to make an effort to not panic if I'm over my goal... after all, I have to live like this, so what's the point in being restrictive?

    Hang in there! You certainly aren't alone in feeling this way... just make sure you see that at the end of the weight loss you need to live life and you can't do that if you're constantly obsessed with calories.
  • leelee429
    leelee429 Posts: 8
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    I think you just described me... I've never really been happy with how I look--I was never really "fat", but of all my friends growing up I was the biggest (and by default became the fat kid), and I've become kind of antisocial because I'm constantly thinking about how I look compared to everyone else even when there's nobody around to impress... which in turn reinforces the negativity because nobody likes being stuck with an introvert (ie. me).

    I also have the obsession with calories--at one point I forced myself to take a break from MFP for a week to show myself that not logging every last calorie wouldn't completely destroy my progress, and I ended up continuing to lose because I've become more in-tune with what's good for me (and I think the extra calories helped me do better in my workouts, which I didn't stop during the break). Now I've just set my calorie goal to maintainance, and if I happen to keep losing that's awesome but I'm going to make an effort to not panic if I'm over my goal... after all, I have to live like this, so what's the point in being restrictive?

    Hang in there! You certainly aren't alone in feeling this way... just make sure you see that at the end of the weight loss you need to live life and you can't do that if you're constantly obsessed with calories.

    Thanks girl, it's good to know I'm not alone! :flowerforyou:

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