Every Single Flippin Time....

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.....I get to my goal or half way to my goal and then I quit or start to peter out. I cannot wrap my head around WHY I do this but I'm here again. I've lost 55lbs (probably back up a few tbh) because I've been slacking as of late and still have another 30 to go. I've done this to myself before and of three things I am certain:

1. I don't want to revert back to my old patterns
2. I've lost momentum and drive
3. I'm afraid I won't get that drive back

I know I'm not alone in this but my question is....How did you get past it? How did you dust yourself off and keep going? Intellectually, I know the right things to do but something in me isn't clicking right now and it's both irritating and scaring me. If you could help share your breakthrough to success story, it may help me see something I'm missing & perhaps help others who can relate as well.

Thanks for listening,
Becky
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Replies

  • SherryR1971
    SherryR1971 Posts: 1,170 Member
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    I'm going to wait and read some replies because I am the same way right now! Thanks for the post!!
  • Tomhoffman84
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    I'm with you...I've lost motivation over the last couple weeks, starting to slip into bad weekend and evening eating habits and skipping workouts.

    i'm going to start varying my workouts on my non-running days to try and get excited about them again, I think part of my problem is I'm bored of the routine.
  • LovelyLaura2321
    LovelyLaura2321 Posts: 56 Member
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    I'm the same way, too. I've been told by several people that if I wanted it bad enough, that I would do it and stick with it. It seems to make sense that that should be the case, but I feel like I do want it bad enough. Maybe I'm just lazy and have no work ethic. Or maybe I'm afraid to fail so I just sabotage my success. Or maybe it's all so overwhelming that I just give up.

    It's extremely hard for me to stick with weight loss, and though I've lost almost 75 pounds, I still feel like I haven't accomplished anything. I'm still just as lazy, and I still have the same cravings. It's annoying, and I too am just wondering when it's all going to click for me.
  • _chiaroscuro
    _chiaroscuro Posts: 1,340 Member
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    Well my success story is still playing out right now, but I have done the same things you have so I'll share why this time is different. There wasn't some big booming breakthrough moment, nothing happened at all. I dug deep and got really honest with myself and discovered that I was afraid of success. If I became extraordinary, people would come to expect that from me. What if I'm a total fraud? What if I can't really sustain that? Dropping back and settling seemed, safer. Sadder, but safer.

    I don't know if that's something you struggle with, but facing that fear changed everydamnthing for me, and some similar soul-searching might yield surprising revelations for you.:flowerforyou:
  • LishieFruit89
    LishieFruit89 Posts: 1,956 Member
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    I know exactly how you feel.
    I've been dealing with this recently.

    And as unhelpful as this is, you just have to do it.

    Maybe get a new workout routine so you'll be motivated again.
    I know part of my lack of motivation was because I was bored with my program and wasn't seeing as much progress with my lifts as I wanted to so I was skipping the gym. Another part was due to the weather since it was cold in the morning, I didn't want to go run. And now that it's better, I've injured myself and can't run =[

    But try something new.
    Bribe yourself.
    Force yourself to keep on keeping on and it'll come back.
  • Fisherdh13
    Fisherdh13 Posts: 37 Member
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    I want to hear responses, too. I'm down 60 pounds and have 20-30 to go and have trouble staying motivated. I'm enjoying where I am now, but I'll enjoy it more if I finish. One of the reasons I slowed down was I don't know how to maintain once I get there and wanted to experiment a little. It hasn't worked. So for me, back on the wagon (fewer simple carbs) and no eating in front of the tv.
  • vorgas
    vorgas Posts: 741 Member
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    Even when I stumbled, and slipped back, I realized that I was starting from a better place than I had last time. I used the time to figure out how to improve my plan and my strategy to achieve it.

    There's nothing wrong with resting for a bit and taking a break. Oh, so I gained a couple pounds, big deal. I can lose those in a few weeks. Nuthin to it.
  • NaEl1
    NaEl1 Posts: 67 Member
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    I get like this sometimes but for me i think im scared of my success. I know its weird but its like what if i really do this?, then what. Its all mental!!! Keep up the good work!!
  • cygnetpro
    cygnetpro Posts: 419 Member
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    Another possibility is self-sabotage. A tendency to revert to a "comfort zone" which is well-known and familiar, instead of moving forward into new territory, new opportunities which may not always be comfortable, etc. At least that is why I seem to do what you are describing.
  • sukifr
    sukifr Posts: 70 Member
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    I suppose the correct thing to say would be 'remember why you started losing weight in the first place' but sometimes we forget how it felt being overweight/fatter.

    Has your routine become boring? Try something new or a different activity. Do you have the same hairstyle as before your started? Maybe go for something different so that you transform into the new you that you're becoming.

    When I watch the Biggest Loser near the end of their time on the ranch they seem to make them carry all the weight they have lost, and that seems to spur them on as the loss becomes real to them - is that an option?

    I know I'll probably get slammed down for not giving the advice that others would perhaps give - but at the end of the day, this is my advice and I hope it helps :smile:

    You've done really well so far, be proud of your achievements!
  • fullofhope76
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    I go through this too, but I made the decision to not let it get me this time. When I start to fade, I really think about why I am doing it and how far I've come and then just dust myself off and start again. I don't let it get me any longer than a day. That way I don't really lose momentum, I just took a break for a day. Good luck to you! Don't give up!
  • StevLL
    StevLL Posts: 921 Member
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    First you've lost 55 so that's amazing and you can be very proud of yourself. My wife (Hootsmamma) and I have been at this a while and it's been up and down an we went up over the holidays and are just getting our stride back on. We all go through lull's, just don't give up on the long term goal. Even if you completely biff it, you can choose at anytime to get back into a positive forward groove.
    Everyone on here with a loss is a winner, sometimes wwe have to change up our journey and then bam! we're back on course.
    Good luck, you've done awesome so far!
    Git-R-Done!
  • Iron_Maiden
    Iron_Maiden Posts: 326 Member
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    WOW! You guys are all hitting the nails on the head. THANK YOU!! :flowerforyou: ....and I'm so glad others can relate and hopefully take something positive out of this too!!!
    I dug deep and got really honest with myself and discovered that I was afraid of success. If I became extraordinary, people would come to expect that from me. What if I'm a total fraud? What if I can't really sustain that? Dropping back and settling seemed, safer. Sadder, but safer.

    I don't know if that's something you struggle with, but facing that fear changed everydamnthing for me, and some similar soul-searching might yield surprising revelations for you.:flowerforyou:

    ^^ I think this has a lot to do with it! Success is scary. Family members have accused me of being selfish in my healthy lifestyle endeavor and even vain so I'm sure this is part of it. Relationships change as I do and it's scary. I think I need to do some soul searching here. THANK YOU!!! :flowerforyou:
  • shoshi68
    shoshi68 Posts: 407 Member
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    Well my success story is still playing out right now, but I have done the same things you have so I'll share why this time is different. There wasn't some big booming breakthrough moment, nothing happened at all. I dug deep and got really honest with myself and discovered that I was afraid of success. If I became extraordinary, people would come to expect that from me. What if I'm a total fraud? What if I can't really sustain that? Dropping back and settling seemed, safer. Sadder, but safer.

    I don't know if that's something you struggle with, but facing that fear changed everydamnthing for me, and some similar soul-searching might yield surprising revelations for you.:flowerforyou:

    Whoa. This is hitting me where I live. Do you know me? :embarassed:
  • conniemaxwell5
    conniemaxwell5 Posts: 943 Member
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    My "stuck" spot was always at 185. That was where I started getting the really great compliments and I would settle for that and would just stop and then gain, gain, gain. This time I just dug in and said, "NO. I'M NOT DONE YET!" I went from going to the gym 3 days a week to 5 days a week and I try to work something in on the weekends to burn some calories. I bought a Body Media armband to help keep me accountable and accurate. I started C25K to give myself a goal other than weight loss. TBH, I think the C25K was what really did it for me. I started feeling challenged, successful, small wins, etc. immediately and my focus shifted from the number on the scale to how much better I felt every day during my workout. I had an injury early on and had to stop running but refused to let that stop me so I switched to the elliptical and basically did the same program without the impact. 5 weeks ago I started it on the treadmill again. 2 weeks ago I walked / ran my first 5K. I'm down to 173 now and have more momentum now than I've ever had, even in the very beginning. My goal is to fully run a 5K before the end of summer this year.

    The one other motivator I had was a quote I found - "If it's important you'll find a way, if it's not, you'll find an excuse." This IS important to me and I WILL find a way. I am so aware of excuses now I'm annoying the people around me because I call them out on theirs too! LOL

    I hope something in my story sparks some motivation for you. The bottom line is, this is a daily choice. Choose to live healthy and for your goals, or choose to give up and stay where you are or go back to where you came from. You already know those places and I'm assuming you weren't happy there. Why not keep going and see what the new you is like? Good luck!
  • xampx
    xampx Posts: 323 Member
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    This is the first time I have made a real effort to lose weight. I am about 4 months in to the serious effort (really good with my diet most of the time, understanding BMRs, TDEEs, lifting weights etc)

    A couple of weeks ago I got really worried because the gym was boring me. And because of that I let it slip last week, ate crap for 3 days and felt rubbish. It motivated me to go back at the end of last week and I felt so much better for it. I am now worrying about when I move in a couple of months, and whether my new gym will be as good and easy to get to, and whether I will not go so much if I am living with my bf and stuff. I just want to go and want to improve and thats what is keeping me going.
  • Iron_Maiden
    Iron_Maiden Posts: 326 Member
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    Well my success story is still playing out right now, but I have done the same things you have so I'll share why this time is different. There wasn't some big booming breakthrough moment, nothing happened at all. I dug deep and got really honest with myself and discovered that I was afraid of success. If I became extraordinary, people would come to expect that from me. What if I'm a total fraud? What if I can't really sustain that? Dropping back and settling seemed, safer. Sadder, but safer.

    I don't know if that's something you struggle with, but facing that fear changed everydamnthing for me, and some similar soul-searching might yield surprising revelations for you.:flowerforyou:

    Whoa. This is hitting me where I live. Do you know me? :embarassed:

    Right!?!?! Dr Phil ain't got nuttin on this group! :wink:
  • Zara11
    Zara11 Posts: 1,247 Member
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    take a weekend to recharge. Change your ticker to your current weight being your start weight so that you don't see all your hard work and think you can relax. get rid of super loose clothing, get tighter things so that you feel it if you start to slip up, and so that you now have the goal of shrinking out of a new pair of jeans, etc. reevaluate your exercise habits, your go-to-meals. try switching it up to feel less bored. set up new goals, make plans (parties, spa treatments) over the next few weeks & tell yourself you need to reach weight loss mini goals by then.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
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    It's ok to take a break for a couple of weeks. But eat at maintenance so you don't gain it back.
  • _chiaroscuro
    _chiaroscuro Posts: 1,340 Member
    Options
    Well my success story is still playing out right now, but I have done the same things you have so I'll share why this time is different. There wasn't some big booming breakthrough moment, nothing happened at all. I dug deep and got really honest with myself and discovered that I was afraid of success. If I became extraordinary, people would come to expect that from me. What if I'm a total fraud? What if I can't really sustain that? Dropping back and settling seemed, safer. Sadder, but safer.

    I don't know if that's something you struggle with, but facing that fear changed everydamnthing for me, and some similar soul-searching might yield surprising revelations for you.:flowerforyou:

    Whoa. This is hitting me where I live. Do you know me? :embarassed:
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