Your opinions please? Men and dating

I'll tell you my story. After about 6 months or so of being single I went on a dating site and found my current boyfriend I've been with for 9 months so far as of today. When we first started talking and hanging out it was just friendly till suddenly I really started falling for him but I didn't know how he felt. When I finally told him he said he just wanted to be single for now until he got back on his feet with a job since he just recently left his other one and didn't know if he wanted to date at the moment. At one point some other guy asked me on a date, so I told the boy I'm with now that someone was asking me out (to see what he'd say) and he told me he didn't want me to wait around and to go ahead. At that point I completely thought yea he's not into me, but as time still passed suddenly one night he asked me out. I was shocked also considering he hadn't gotten a job yet but he told me the job he had an interview for that he decided if he got the job or not, he was going to ask me out either way. So when he told me he wasn't in the right spot to date he was actually telling me the truth and really did actually like me, he just didn't want to get in too deep too soon. Today he has a great job and is head over heels for me as I am for him, so sometimes boys really are telling the truth when they said they aren't in the right time of their life or mindset. Sometimes just got to give them some space I suppose and if he doesn't come back around then it just wasn't meant to be.

oh yea it definitely does, the funny part is that when he came back around that was pretty much when I decided to move on. Unfortunately as fast as you want to know the answer sometimes all you need is time, his actions will let you know

You put yourself out there, he isn't ready. If he changes his mind, balls in his court. Dont wait for him.

Women rebound from break ups far better than men......we act like we are over things but deep down we are not.

"Would you like to go on a date sometime?"

LOL. You botched it.

Should've just asked if he wanted to chill, maybe have some dates and cheese at the park or something. Some guys get uncomfortable when you put the moves on them like that. Hang out, chill, go see that new Joseph-Gordon-Levitt movie.... you gotta keep it low-key and smooth next time. You really blew this one. Just forget about him and focus on the next chum.

Jeeze, man..I would never say "she blew it" he was giving her a vibe. what u said is kinda harsh

Respect his answer.

I like that. I like it a lot. He's a nice guy, otherwise I wouldn't have asked him out. It's easy to fall into the trap of thinking all guys have double meanings behind what they say though.

the guys i know don't have double meanings, unless we're talking about pseudonyms through texting.
they just say how it is. there's nothing to read into.

It s all in the approach, you have something in common, dance.
I would have arranged to be at the door when class was over at the same time, and casually mention to him you and a few of your friends ( girls) were going dancing Friday night and if he wasn t busy, to drop by. Heck, offer to buy him a drink.
No pressure. If he shows, great, you have a chance to show off your dance moves with / for him.
If he doesn t show, next time you see him tell him about the great time he missed on the dance floor with you and your friends.
Tease him, ask him if it s because you are a better dancer that he didn t show up. * smile and look him right in the eyes when you say this*
Game on . . . It s all in the approach . . . good luck.

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus. Men go to their cave, women talk - your post has proved it :-)

umm, not to sound mean but... how are you possibly making this about yourself?

He's in a terrible place. Its only understandable that he wants to stay away from dating for a bit. Ask him out again when he's in a bit better place.

Well, I put myself out there and I got rejected, so I feel sad. That's why it's about me. And I'm not making it all about me in his presence, just in a little online vent... so I'm not gonna feel bad about that.

ok gonna give this another attempt to try and make you think logically since you seem like a nice enough person.

I know you're hurt, that is fine. However, he might be attracted to you and still need his time off and space from dating. I know in the past when I broke up, I just shagged somebody I could get hold of and never called them later or anything. They were just there to let out the steam.

Be thankful that he's not thinking of you as rebound. Give him some time and then try again.

He may really be in a bad spot in his life and not want to drag you into it.

I say give him his space. You never know, he may come back to in a month and say "Sorry about before, I just needed to get some stuff figured out, you still want that date?"

:flowerforyou:

Don't sweat it. Listen to the bearded man who posted above me.

Once, I turned down a date bc I lived at a halfway house. that dude was sexy, too. Had to say no, but couldn't exactly tell him why, you know? My point is that you never know what's going on in someone's life. Maybe he is on the tail end of a relationship, or has bedbugs, or his last gf told him he was sexually inadequate and now he is scared.... or he lives in a halfway house. You never know.

Also, you are darling