Body Dismorphia

dawnmg81
dawnmg81 Posts: 10 Member
edited November 12 in Success Stories
Anyone else suffer with body dismorphia? I still have a long ways to go with my weight loss journey but have lost 60 lbs so far. I look in the mirror and see no difference. I still see the ginormous obese mommy that I was when I started this journey. I am still obese, but I ma sure parts of me are smaller after losing 60 lbs. I hear compliments from people on my weight loss but always feel as though they are just saying it to try and be nice since most people know i am trying to lose weight. I dont feel like they actually see the difference.

Is it normal to feel like this? I didnt really take any before pictures (which i regret hugely) so i cant really go back and look at comparisons between 6 months ago and now.
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Replies

  • Iron_Lotus
    Iron_Lotus Posts: 2,295 Member
    Yup. I actually had to go digging for old pictures for constant comparison I need them to remind me how far I have come despite how I feel.
  • sweetpea129
    sweetpea129 Posts: 755 Member
    YES YES YES. I look in the mirror and still think im huge and can barely tell a difference. But if i look at pictures i can see a big difference. However, i often tell myself that the camera must have just been good or i was standing at a good angle or something along those lines. I still think im fat even though people tell me i'm not. It messes with my head a lot to be honest. Once in a great while i will get a quick glimpse in the mirror as i walk by and realize that its me. But yes, i'm having a much harder time mentally than i did physically losing the weight :(
  • deb3129
    deb3129 Posts: 1,294 Member
    Yep. I have just now gotten to the point where I can see it. And still only sometimes, like if I look in a pic or happen to catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror when I am not expecting it!
  • redhead1910
    redhead1910 Posts: 304 Member
    I also lost 60 pounds and I spend about half an hour looking in the mirror each day and nit pick at every single thing I hate about myself. I feel you. Even at 130 pounds I still can't find anything I like about my body. Body Dysmorphia sucks. :(
  • endoftheside
    endoftheside Posts: 568 Member
    What I see in the mirror essentially reflects how I am feeling at the moment, good OR bad. Kinda weird. The only way I get a less biased judgment is when I catch an unexpected glimpse of myself in a mirror or reflection in glass. Pictures would work too, probably, but I haven't taken any in a long time.
  • closenre
    closenre Posts: 225 Member
    Happens to guys too.. ive lost 70 lbs and even though I can see my abs I still feel like I look big.. im in a size 30 and still feel like my love handles show thru my clothes or hang over shorts when im shirtless
  • Alexandra289
    Alexandra289 Posts: 330 Member
    I'm glad you posted this - I've been looking into this disorder today. All my life my parents have been telling me they think I have body dismorphia but now I'm starting to think they're right. I was worried I was becoming super vain because I couldn't stop looking in the mirror but I think it's because I obsess over every flaw. Almost every woman I see I think 'how big am I compared to her?'. Don't like myself for thinking about appearance for so much!

    I can look in the mirror wearing an outfit and think I look OK, then I'll look in the same mirror wearing the same outfit 10 minutes later and suddenly I'll look massive - sometimes I feel like I don't actually know what I look like. I obsess over how my stomach looks and it's never good enough no matter how much weight I lose. I can see a difference in weight in pictures but otherwise I feel exactly the same.

    Wish there was an easy way to stop this but it's definitely not just you
  • Duck_Puddle
    Duck_Puddle Posts: 3,237 Member
    Every day. I see morbidly obese me in the mirror. Cognitively, I know I'm smaller. But eyes and my brain don't see it in the mirror. I see it in pictures, but I don't recognize the person in the pictures as me. This topic comes up a lot and it seems it just takes time. I'm hoping that's true.
  • Shr3dded
    Shr3dded Posts: 232
    Does it count if I check myself out in the mirror 10+ times a day noting what muscle insertions I'd like to pump up more?

    If so, yes. And proud of it.
  • avvalynna
    avvalynna Posts: 32
    It's funny that you posted this. I had a similar conversation last night with someone. I'm down 25lbs but see no difference. I have 3 photos and I tried to compare them and they all look the same. I finally asked someone and they thought I was nuts and then told me I looked less bulky... Doesn't boost the self confidence much but I guess less bulky is better than nothing? /sigh...bulky...
  • sweetpea129
    sweetpea129 Posts: 755 Member
    It's funny that you posted this. I had a similar conversation last night with someone. I'm down 25lbs but see no difference. I have 3 photos and I tried to compare them and they all look the same. I finally asked someone and they thought I was nuts and then told me I looked less bulky... Doesn't boost the self confidence much but I guess less bulky is better than nothing? /sigh...bulky...

    Fwiw, I started where you did (well 7 lbs heavier) & I didn't notice any difference at all until I was down 50 lbs. It suddenly became much more obvious.
  • lee91356
    lee91356 Posts: 330 Member
    Yes! no more need be said lol.

    I still feel like a "fatty bombasta" as I call it, even after losing over 120lbs. According to the BMI ticker I still have a way to go for a healthy BMI but people have already started telling me that I look so "thin" and I need to stop losing weight but I look in the mirror and wonder if we're seeing the same thing lol :tongue:

    But other days when I put on my NEW SMALL TIGHTER shirt/ skirt/ jeans/ etc. I think yah I look pretty good :wink:
  • toutmonpossible
    toutmonpossible Posts: 1,580 Member
    I don't think there are any easy answers. Keep working on losing weight, and when you reach your goal, on maintaining your loss. One measure of successful weight loss is maintaining for at least five years. By that point, you may well view yourself in a different light.

    I don't believe every problem is solved 100%. A big improvement isn't bad, though.
  • PlunderBunneh
    PlunderBunneh Posts: 1,705 Member
    I struggled with this a lot. Even now, I still feel bigger than I am, but not as big as I used to be, if that makes sense. It took about a year of being right around this size for my brain to finally accept it. I'm still shocked when I fold my clothes, though. No way can I fit in that shirt, or those pants, and jeesh those panties are tiny.
    Pictures help, but mostly, just measure yourself, and look up those numbers for comparison anytime you need a reminder.
    I was 280, am now 175 and have been around this weight for a year, and although I'm happy here, would eventually hope to reach 156. I'm 5'8.
  • lithezebra
    lithezebra Posts: 3,670 Member
    Give yourself a chance to adjust. Change, even positive change, can be stressful. Maybe it's taking time for your self image to catch up with how successful and effective you can be.
  • Melo1966
    Melo1966 Posts: 881 Member
    My issue with myself is in pictures. I feel cute wearing something look in the mirror and think I look ok then I take a picture and it shows how fat I still am. I got a front view camera and looked in the mirror and at the camera and can see my double chin in the camera but not in the mirror. I like my profile pic because it is blurry.
  • cleanandlean2012
    cleanandlean2012 Posts: 71 Member
    Absolutely! I have lost 46lbs and can barely see a difference. I went back to my family town this weekend and received so many compliments, along side being featured in a group for weight loss success. I have gone from UK size 22 to size 14/16 and cannot see a difference.

    My solution, surround yourself with people you trust. They will tell you when you look awesome and also if you eventually lose too much.
  • lalaland82
    lalaland82 Posts: 176 Member
    I just got off the phone to my best friend an hour ago crying over this. I tried on my wedding dress with my sister and was horrified when I looked in the mirror and saw fat arms and fat back etc etc, when I said to lady in the shop well at least I know i still need a lot of work on my back she looked confused and asked me what was wrong with my back. My sis took a photo for me and its not anywhere near what I see in the mirror.
    When I was last dieting and exercising I used to think I was still massive, only wore baggy trackies and a long sleeved baggy top when I worked out so no-one would see my fat - though I have seen photos and I can honestly say I looked too thin, bones everywhere!!
    It drives me mental and I have no idea what to do about it - just wish I could see what I actually look like!
    This time I have chosen a weight target which is slap bang in the middle of normal weight for me and will just hope I can learn to love myself there :smile:
  • micabrito2012
    micabrito2012 Posts: 103 Member
    Well, I have never weighed over 200 lbs until I was in my 30's so guess what? In my mind I don't think I'm fat or overweight. It's not until I try and play sports or I take pictures and see them later. Then I realize that I am huge! I get all synical about it and go all out trying to get where I was and slowly go back to my old eating habits. I truley look in the mirror and do not think I am over weight!!!! I think that qualifies as body dismorphic disorder. I have lost weight before and am totally happy at a certain weight but now that i weigh 212 I notice my knees are bad, my sex is bad, my light of life is dimming but I'm not fat!!!!!

    I started MFP Jan of 2012 I think and I have relapsed many times and I hope to one day "click" and stick to something and learn to accept that I am overweight and that I am doing the right thing and that I need to continue.I just have this problem that I'm trying to sort out. I have been trying to come to terms with my weight and that I am over a healthy limit it just has taken me longer than I've liked. Keep your head up I think we have to realize we are beautiful people inside and out and we need to find something that really pushes our want button!

    I want to be healthy when I look in the mirror and know that I am healthy inside and out! I want to see a lean peace of meat!
    Right now I see a Double Quarter Pounder W/Cheese W/Large Fry and Large Dr.Pepper sure looks good on the menu but feels horrible when coming out! lol Good luck!
  • ReinasWrath
    ReinasWrath Posts: 1,173 Member
    oh yeah I'm like that too. Some very rare days I think I look good but on most other days I almost feel more disgusted than ever. I'm always grabbing the pudge on my thighs and stomach and telling myself I am still gross. I am not really sure how I look in real life? My two perspectives of myself are so different I don't know which one is the trick my mind is playing. I mean I know I still have a decent amount of work left to do either way but I'm not sure how obvious that is. And I've got people on both sides saying either "oh you've lost a lot of weight you look nice" and people who say "well you're still pretty fat". :laugh: Guess I just need to keep working till I feel confident no matter what. :p
  • DebbieMc3
    DebbieMc3 Posts: 289 Member
    I have BD as well. I'm working on it everyday. A few weeks ago someone said to me "well you skinny girls don't get my struggles". I was like "skinny???". Then two days ago I saw a picture of a bunch of friends at a party and I thought to myself "who is that? She has a great waist and butt." It was me. I was shocked. The brain is very powerful.
  • Ironandwine69
    Ironandwine69 Posts: 2,432 Member
    I look myself in the mirror and think " god damn look at that hot piece of *kitten*"....then I take my clothes off and it turns into " *kitten*, where did this roll come from".

    It happens. We are our worst judges at times.
  • rednote49
    rednote49 Posts: 124 Member
    Dig out some of your old clothes like pants or jeans. Especially the ones that were really tight. Put those on to remind yourself how far you've come. You may not have pics but you do have clothes.
  • Morgaen73
    Morgaen73 Posts: 2,817 Member
    It took my brain y ears to catch up to my body and I'm still not sure it has quite caught up. I still think twice before sitting on a plastic chair (broke a few of those) and tight spaces stress me out even though I fit through them.

    Give it time. You will get there :)
  • Smaya29
    Smaya29 Posts: 106 Member
    edited September 2017
    I feel you. I lost 17 pounds but I still feel like I'm at my starting weight of 172 lbs. I see women who are about 180-200 lbs and I feel like that's exactly how I look like. Every day is a struggle. Then I get so depressed that I fall off the wagon for a few months. It's constantly messing with my head.
    The only comfort I get is when I feel my clothes are not such a tight fit like before. but I detest looking in the mirror. It makes me want to cry.
    I just hope that when I reach 120 lbs (my lowest weight before having Irish twins) I would feel better.
  • artbyrachelh
    artbyrachelh Posts: 338 Member
    I think I am a little like this. Though when I was at my heaviest I didn't see it in the mirror. I thought I looked great! I thought I was fine!
  • Ghostofachance
    Ghostofachance Posts: 305 Member
    I struggle with this all of the time. When I was at my thinnest, I would pore over every flaw in the mirror. When I was at my heaviest, I struggled to reconcile the person I saw in photos/in the mirror was me. Even today, I was feeling pretty good about myself this morning, then saw a recent picture someone took of me on Facebook and it really threw me for a loop. I know I am working out, losing some weight and feeling stronger, but all I saw in the photo was a fat guy standing around a group of "average" people.
  • IsabeausRose
    IsabeausRose Posts: 129 Member
    BD and eating disorders go hand in hand quite a lot. And I'm absolutely positive I'm not the only one on this site who has suffered from one. Anorexia and bulimia aren't the only forms eating disorders take. Overweight people can get them too. From emotional eating, to compulsive eating. And the common binge eating. It's been a 25 year struggle for me and the BD never has gotten any better, it will never go away for me. But I'm in my 40s now and I've made enough mistakes from listening to that dismorphia to tell what's the healthiest for me and what's just me wanting to be thinner and thinner and thinner. There is a difference between choosing to have healthy thoughts or letting what you see in a mirror determine what a healthy weight for you should be. I made a promise to myself not to go below a certain weight no matter what I saw in the mirror. I want to have a healthy body and also a healthy mind. I'm too *kitten* old to care about being the thinnest or fitting into those size 6 jeans. The doctor says I'm at a healthy weight and that's fine with me. I'm 5'11.5" with a BMI of 24.3.
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