Has anyone been "Blamed" for someone else getting fat?

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PJ64
PJ64 Posts: 866 Member
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I recently ran into an "Ex" who has gained a WHOLE LOT of weight. She sent me an e-mail claiming "When you & I broke up I couldn't go to the gym anymore, too many bad memories, so I just ate"

WTF!?? Yeah right! Thats like me blaming my weight gain on the "Little Debbie Snack cakes" for making their treats so delicious
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  • redhead1910
    redhead1910 Posts: 304 Member
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    Projecting your own failiures onto someone else is so stupid. It would infuriate me if someone daid that to me. I would be like "Unless I force fed you all those cheese burgers and milk shakes it's your own damn fault!"
  • LonLB
    LonLB Posts: 1,126 Member
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    my ex while we were together would actively try to derail me. After a while it started to wear on me.



    Yea it should have been an early warning sign but in the early stages of us getting really serious she would give me the "selfish guilt trip" about taking time to go to the gym.
  • casy84
    casy84 Posts: 290 Member
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    She may have been embarassed that you saw how big she got and felt the need to find an excuse for it
  • PlayerHatinDogooder
    PlayerHatinDogooder Posts: 1,018 Member
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    I thought it was only current spouses and significant others that sabotaged people's weight loss around here.
  • craigmandu
    craigmandu Posts: 976 Member
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    I find alot of people blame others for their own shortcomings!
  • PaleoChocolateBear
    PaleoChocolateBear Posts: 2,844 Member
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    I find alot of people blame others for their own shortcomings!

    This
  • saxmaniac
    saxmaniac Posts: 1,133 Member
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    I recently ran into an "Ex" who has gained a WHOLE LOT of weight. She sent me an e-mail claiming "When you & I broke up I couldn't go to the gym anymore, too many bad memories, so I just ate"

    From this, it doesn't sound like blame. Assigning blame would be "...and it's all your fault".

    Sometimes people have emotional triggers to overeating. It does happen.
  • PaleoChocolateBear
    PaleoChocolateBear Posts: 2,844 Member
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    I recently ran into an "Ex" who has gained a WHOLE LOT of weight. She sent me an e-mail claiming "When you & I broke up I couldn't go to the gym anymore, too many bad memories, so I just ate"

    From this, it doesn't sound like blame. Assigning blame would be "...and it's all your fault".

    Sometimes people have emotional triggers to overeating. It does happen.

    No that's assigning blame, in a passive aggressive way she wants him to feel guilty for her weight gain because she used the break as a reason to eat and stop working out.
  • PJ64
    PJ64 Posts: 866 Member
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    Trust me it's blame, there was a lot more of the "passive aggressive" crap in the e-mail.

    The funny thing is, I NEVER workked out with her. She was fit when we met, We went to different gyms and never even ran a 5K together.

    Just another person blaming others for something they did to themselves
  • _noob_
    _noob_ Posts: 3,306 Member
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    I've blamed myelf for allowing myself to get fat if that counts...
  • JenAndSome
    JenAndSome Posts: 1,908 Member
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    She sounds fantastic. I would just be glad she's an "ex" if I were you.
  • saxmaniac
    saxmaniac Posts: 1,133 Member
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    No that's assigning blame, in a passive aggressive way she wants him to feel guilty for her weight gain because she used the break as a reason to eat and stop working out.

    You know, you're probably right. Depends on the context and tone.

    If someone asked her "hey, why did you gain weight" then the answer doesn't seem like it.
    If she just brought up out of the blue, then probably.

    Hard to tell.
  • PJ64
    PJ64 Posts: 866 Member
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    She sounds fantastic. I would just be glad she's an "ex" if I were you.


    I am!!
  • Zombriana
    Zombriana Posts: 764 Member
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    I blamed my ex for me getting fat. After we broke up I lost 20 lbs. I guess that's what happens when you can afford real food again. Living off of microwavable chimichangas, burritos and free pizza isn't good for anyone.

    [edit] oh boy. I wasn't aware that NOT going to the gym makes you fat. :|
  • miadhail
    miadhail Posts: 383 Member
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    That's so odd your ex would do that, almost sounds pathetic. The last break up I had (which was years ago), I decided to change myself for the better, worked out, lost a lot of weight, and was honestly the best shape I ever was. Sure enough, he begged me to come back to him. Lol, of course, I ain't returning back to a cheater. :)
  • lithezebra
    lithezebra Posts: 3,670 Member
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    It's a compliment. She was really broken up over your breakup.
  • LaurenAOK
    LaurenAOK Posts: 2,475 Member
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    I mean, I see where she's coming from. When I gained weight it was because my boyfriend and I had broken up, and I was too depressed to work out or bother cooking, so I sat in bed all day and got fast food when I was hungry.

    I would never BLAME him for that though. It wasn't his fault :P
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
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    Yep. Made my wife fat twice. She's not taking any more chances.
  • ProudMotherof4ProudWife2007
    ProudMotherof4ProudWife2007 Posts: 307 Member
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    no but my in laws try to de rail me all the time and a bunch of family blame my in laws on their weight gain
  • sevsmom
    sevsmom Posts: 1,172 Member
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    Blame shifting. . .a neat what to try to side step personal responsibility. Was she sad after the break up? Probably. Did she eat her emotions? Obviously. You're fault??? Nah.

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