Do you get decent support at home?
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I guess I am lucky. My husband is super supportive. He likes to hear about what I have done for the day. He eats whatever I eat. He works 12-14 hours a day, and is happy to have me pack him a healthier lunch which makes it easier for me because the stuff I am trying to avoid is no longer in the house. He comments on the changes he sees also, which is awesome!!!0
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We need to build support systems in our lives that work. Families might try to sabotage our health for their own reasons---I think it is important to develop networks that bypass those issues. Just keep eating healthy, if you have kids provide them with a great role model and lots of healthy food, don't engage in arguments about food with the family members who are trying to hold you back.
Engaging in arguments or trying to get others to support you who are stuck in their ways is a waste of time---but sometimes slowly over time you might see that you are a positive influence in the lives of those previously unsupportive.
I try to be sympathetic, family might be scared that if you lose weight you won't love them anymore---or that you will judge them.
Find some support in your friends or here on MFP.0 -
Maybe you should ask her to come along just to keep you company? Nothing else? She can bring a book or something! And then she'll see how much you enjoy it and you can begin encouraging her to join in with you
My family is terrible with support, too.
While I'm busy making brown rice (later than my brothers and sisters, who have eaten pizza or something), my Mum will come in and make a bacon sandwich, or cheese on toast, and I just get so angry with her.
My Dad always brings a lot of 'junk food' in from shopping and is always offering me stuff, he also rarely buys the food that I would like and have put down on the shopping list. The only support I really get is from my sister Nina, who doesn't live with us anymore anyway.
I really don't understand, and I don't know what to do. I've asked time and time again for them to cut down on bringing so much food in, but nothing happens >__<0 -
No support here.My DH will go out and buy doughnuts for the kid's and expect me to control myself, but I wonder if it is because he is insecure about losing me if I get slim funny thing is he was the slim one when we got married. My kid's sometimes help and other times forget and buy me treats. *sigh* but I decided that "if it's to be it's up to me" anyway.0
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My other half is using mfp as well. We just got to the point where we wanted to be healthier.0
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I think my husband would be supportive if he knew how to be. He knows it is important for me to lose this weight. I have tried on and off for years now. When I told him I wanted his help to train for a 5K, he didn't take me seriously. To his defense, he works nights and takes care of the house while I work and go to school full-time. He just wants me to be happy.
On the brighter side, I have found a friend that is helping me train for the 5K. We started last week and are signed up for the run October 4th. She is doing WW which is just to much work. I much prefer MFP!
I hope you are able to get that support from somewhere because it is vital to your success.0 -
Mine is for the most part. He even made an account as a token show of support. The only nit picks I have iwth him are when he offers me beers in the evening even though he knows I haven't allotted any cals for them and I've completely stopped talking about how many cals are in different foods. Nothing malicious or hurtful though and he's all for me trimming up.
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I get very little support from my family. I had gastric bypass 7 months ago and have lost 75 pounds, and am 95 pounds below my highest weight. My dad thinks my weight loss is wonderful and asks about it every time he calls, but he's had weight issues most of his life and is still going to the gym every day to keep it under control. All my husband has done is gripe about how much money I'm spending on vitamins/supplements, protein powder and protein bars. If I ask him, he'll tell me that I look much better, but it doesn't mean a whole lot if I had to drag it out of him. My daughter is the only person in my house who is encouraging - she comments on "new" (10 years old, but she's never seen them before) clothes, she rides her bike with me when I run. I'm not sure my sons even notice.0
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My husband is super supportive. He buys me all my equipment, works out with me, eats any healthy concoction that I make and encourages me every step of the way. I am a very lucky girl
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My husband is slim, the perfect "V"-- broad shoulders, slender waist and hips, 5'8", 145 lbs. He is supportive. He spots for me when we lift weights and occasionally I catch him watching me while I am lifting and he smiles and gives me a thumbs up. Or out of no where he'll say, "lookin' good!" He and I focus on fitness and health together, and weight loss is my thing. He eats whatever I eat, except larger portions. He doesn't do anything to subvert my efforts. It would just be out of character for him to be "overtly" supportive with constant feedback about my weight loss,and I am fine with that.0
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Yes and it has made all the difference in the world! We are on the same page in regards to dinner plans, schedules, etc.
We don't workout together and he chooses to use his calories differently, but we've both been very encouraging to one another. When one of us is not feeling motivated, you constantly have someone lifting you up!0 -
My SO is wonderful and supportive. He started MFP first then got me started. When I have bad days he is there with encouragement and I likewise support him when he struggles. We have made a true lifestyle change. He does the grocery shopping and cooking. Okay I am pretty spoiled.
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My DH has no interest in logging food but since I do all the cooking he is happy as a clam that I have taken total control over our food to assure he is eating healthy and balanced.
He has been my biggest champion and supporter. It makes it so much easier to be successful because he is in my corner. He also happens to like my new body - :-)0 -
it's at the point now that I keep my excitement to myself, otherwise I just get upset.
Yeah same. Mu parents don't mean to be rude, but that just don't get it. And they are so oblivious (or in denial) to any issues I've had in regards to body image ect. So frustrating sometimes!!
They also think lifting will make me bulky, which is SOO frustrating.
And yeah I've learnt the hard way to keep it to myself. They just don't get it or understand this whole thing like you guys dooo!0 -
My husband is a twig. He's never had to worry. He works a very physical job and eats about 3000 calories a day. He's just one of those lucky guys.
As far as being supportive--he's great and he sucks at the same time. Ha ha! He has no problem taking care of dinner and other things so I can go to spin class after work a couple nights a week. He tries to cook for my special dietary restrictions. And he never complains while I sit and log every bite of food. However, he has no idea what my battle is like. He can consume cheeseburgers and ice cream and beer to his heart's content. So sometimes he gets frustrated when I say, "I can't eat that". He won't workout with me--unless we're splitting firewood when we go camping.
But oh well! I'm not doing this for him. I'm doing it for myself. He gives me enough support to make my lifestyle possilbe. But it's not a lifestyle he chose for himself, so I don't think it would be fair to expect anything more.0 -
I get no support at all, my mum thinks im stupid for weighing my food and choosing fruit n veg over chips and fried food. I've lost 7 kg but no one has said anything except for a lady at college who asked if i was sick. I'm at a reasonably healthy weight now and my muscles are visible in some places so I definitely don't look sick. It sucks cos i've worked so hard and it hasn't been easy at all and i'm not even halfway to my goal. It would be nice if my friends or family would notice but then i remind myself that i'm not doing this for anyone else so it doesn't matter. But thats part of the reason im on MFP, I get encouragement from my friends list (none of whom iv met in real life) just for logging my cals! :flowerforyou: .0
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I don't know how to answer my own question, so I am leaning towards saying no.
My wife doesn't really ever say anything about my weight, good or bad. I ask her to workout with me and that never happens. Yes, she works hard, and about 50 hours a week, but I think she loves working that much. But she always complains that she is tired. I explain that working out gives me more energy.. Stil, all of my workouts are done alone.
Do you get decent support at home?
I would LOVE to have the chance to support my wife.
I think women and men often miscommunicate in this manner:
When a woman complains about something, she is not looking for a solution but for an acknowledgement of an effort she has made.
When a man hears a complaint, he wants to help and his mind leaps ahead to find a solution to the problem.
Instead of hearing the acknowledgement she is after, the woman hears what she should have done and gets miffed.
Instead of hearing thanks for the helpful solution, the man gets a cranky retort, and gets miffed.0 -
My husband is kind of supportive. He will say congrats or good job if I tell him I lost a few pounds. He is fine with what I decide to make for dinner. He's happy that we are getting healthy as a family, but he refuses to work out with me or even go for a walk with us. He works long hours so I understand not wanting to go for a walk, but he complains about how much he weighs still. He will watch the kiddos so I can go for a jog, if I decide not to take them with me.
It's frustrating that he still brings home junk food or asks me to go buy ice cream or whatever. I can say no, and I do, but it's way too tempting having that stuff in the house. I want us all to get healthy and lay off the junk food but it's hard when he's bringing chips, donuts, and cakes home once a week!
He seen my one month progress picture and didn't say anything. Even after I told him that I still had a long way to go, he said nothing
In that moment I needed a little support and didn't get it.
My daughter is supportive ( she likes to work out with me!) and my mom is a great cheerleader.0 -
A year ago, SO was doing MFP with me, but we both fell out of the habit. I've gotten back into it, but he hasn't. He knows I'm making efforts, but he doesn't acknowledge them unless I say to him, "I lost another pound!" He did get me a pair of headphones designed for athletic use for my birthday, though.
He and I live with his mother, who is also trying to lose weight. She's been on Paleo for a few months now, so she sympathizes with me about food choices and activity.0 -
Nope. My successes are kept quiet at home. My friends and colleagues are very proud of me though, so that helps.0
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