Do your family/friends find your diet annoying?
ediebo20
Posts: 6
Is it just me or does anyone else feel a little scrutinized for changing their diet?
My family, friends and boyfriend sometimes do make snide comments about 'fussy eating' and my brother said something the other day about 'YOUR stupid vegetable healthy stuff'... I mean, I'm currently attempting maintenance as I have lost all the weight I need to, but I am still trying to keep up healthy eating habits which means still eating more vegetables, whole grains, lean meat etc and apparently that makes me a bad person for eating an alternative to burgers and fries!
Does anyone else get this? I don't really know how to deal with it... I hate feeling like I am annoying people but at the same time I want to keep healthy for myself. I had a McDonald's happy meal the other day and my boyfriend said 'I feel a lot happier when you eat fast food!' Great!
My family, friends and boyfriend sometimes do make snide comments about 'fussy eating' and my brother said something the other day about 'YOUR stupid vegetable healthy stuff'... I mean, I'm currently attempting maintenance as I have lost all the weight I need to, but I am still trying to keep up healthy eating habits which means still eating more vegetables, whole grains, lean meat etc and apparently that makes me a bad person for eating an alternative to burgers and fries!
Does anyone else get this? I don't really know how to deal with it... I hate feeling like I am annoying people but at the same time I want to keep healthy for myself. I had a McDonald's happy meal the other day and my boyfriend said 'I feel a lot happier when you eat fast food!' Great!
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Replies
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Been there, done that, and wrote the book. Keep doing what you are doing - that's all you can do.
My friends pick the most gawd awful restaurants to eat at too - in fact they want to go out for fried chicken wings tonight. That's all fine and dandy as normally I would pick something else on the menu, if it were a normal restaurant. However, at this place, that is pretty much all they have, unless I just want to eat only a side salad.
I wouldn't mind eating something higher calorie, but it has to be absolutely wonderful tasting, and fried chicken wings DO NOT fall under that category... lol0 -
They did at first. Then they watched me lose a crap ton of weight, and now they're cool with it.0
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I have been thru this and continue to face this. I have been called crazy and obsessed even. I try to bring my own snacks wherever i go so i know i will always have something healthy on hand if i am in a position where i need to eat something. I have been laughed at more time than i can count. I have been called too picky because i ask for something to be made MY way.
But i really dont care what people think any more... I am proof that what i am doing is working. I have turned down requests to go places with friends due to the fact i refuse to eat at a place that i cant order something i enjoy. Its not worth it to me unless i truly want to.
Keep doing what you are doing...im sure they would like to have your dedication and secretly admire you for it!! Now that you are at your weight you have to keep doing what you are doing and be vigilant or it will come back.
Sounds like your boyfriend would like to sabatoge you.0 -
When I first started at 215 lbs (just shy of being in the obese category), I didn't get as much flack for it. However, the closer I got to my goal weight, the more scrutiny and comments I got about my healthy eating choices.
Many people don't understand why I still track my intake now that I've reached my goal. The answer is I don't want to be another statistic of somebody who lost the weight, only to gain it back.0 -
I have been thru this and continue to face this. I have been called crazy and obsessed even. I try to bring my own snacks wherever i go so i know i will always have something healthy on hand if i am in a position where i need to eat something. I have been laughed at more time than i can count. I have been called too picky because i ask for something to be made MY way.
But i really dont care what people think any more... I am proof that what i am doing is working. I have turned down requests to go places with friends due to the fact i refuse to eat at a place that i cant order something i enjoy. Its not worth it to me unless i truly want to.
Keep doing what you are doing...im sure they would like to have your dedication and secretly admire you for it!! Now that you are at your weight you have to keep doing what you are doing and be vigilant or it will come back.
Sounds like your boyfriend would like to sabatoge you.
Congrats on your stats and making goal!0 -
Sometimes I deal with this... However, I'm at the point of "I don't care what they think".... I have lost about 60lbs, and I'm loving the new me. I will not stop for them... Most of the time it's just jealousy on their part. However, I have had the opportunity to inspire others. My mom is now losing weight and she has lost 15 lbs so far (in 2 months). I'm just glad that I can make an influence on others which makes it worth it.0
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My family finds it most annoying when I decide not to go out to eat with them. I don't do this all the time, just sometimes I might be coming off a bad weekend and have set my mind to stay in line for the week.
It's hard to get them to understand that I have to make these choices for myself sometimes, especially when they are heading to the local bar and grill to get 3/4 lb burgers.0 -
Most of them are very encouraging. A few remind me to "not lose too much weight." I think they think I'm trying to get back to my 20 year old 5'7" 103 pound and ate everything in sight self.
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My family finds it most annoying when I decide not to go out to eat with them. I don't do this all the time, just sometimes I might be coming off a bad weekend and have set my mind to stay in line for the week.
It's hard to get them to understand that I have to make these choices for myself sometimes, especially when they are heading to the local bar and grill to get 3/4 lb burgers.
I handle this by eating first, then just ordering a glass of wine while they kill their arteries.0 -
They did at first. Then they watched me lose a crap ton of weight, and now they're cool with it.
You made me choke on my smoothie! ROFL! Love it!0 -
I get it all the time. In the last year I have changed my complete lifestyle. Do not get me wrong Ill have a brownie or eat out here and there. However, I don't ( like you mentioned) seek this out. So when I try avoid it or minimize crap in my food choices Ill get comments from my mom like " well we will bring our own food cause you dont like to eat what we eat" well I have a family and cook the best for all of us, and things the kids will eat. So it's not like we are on the raw food diet here... so the change in our diet isn't extreme.. Oh The frustration!
Keep at it though! You worked to hard to lose it over some fries 0 -
Yup. My friends actually dragged me a restaurant where there was nothing healthy and said to me to have a cheat day even though it'd only been a week in. I end up having something of their dessert menu which was a fruit salad. Plus if I dare to have a guilty snack at home, someone (mother dearest) will remark "i thought you were on your diet". EVERY. SINGLE.TIME
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I don't know if they think it's annoying but yesterday we had a cookout with my parents and she made a ton of food I didn't want to eat. Sure, I could have just had small helpings of things but I didn't want to. My mom made the comment, I don't know what you eat anymore. I mean, I still eat food, lol, just not unhealthy food. I don't know if she took offense and honestly I didn't care. She is overweight herself and I don't want to be her when I am her age. If she wants to eat that way, there is nothing I can do about it BUT I can control what I eat and what I don't eat. I don't think I should be given a hard time for being healthy. I don't let it bother me. I am gaining so much more, and not extra weight!0
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people are always going to criticize you when you make a change but all you gotta do is focus on you and not what other people think because there not trying to do the same thing you are I get it all the time a lot of times I don't even go out to eat with my friends because they wanna go to the worst restaraunts ever they always say "you don't always have to eat healthy" but if I followed what they said I would be eatin bad everyday because that's all they eat just focus on you and what you want to do. just stay focused and committed and don't listen to what other people criticize you of even if its family theres always going to be someone trying to bring you down0
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I to a cafe the other day, to meet an old school friend, who ended up having a cheeseburger and complained that i should have one too, as it's what polite.
I didn't, and lost 7lbs this week (my first week but still) and i'm glad i never had one.
She said it tasted like crap anyways.
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I'm getting flack for NOT changing my diet habits while pregnant. I upped my calories, but still eat pretty healthily for the most part. I'm pregnant, so apparently I'm supposed to pig out and not give a crap. Not gonna happen!!0
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Yes! I just got home from college and I'm pretty sure my family is trying to sabotage me. My dad is really big into Paleo so a lot of bacon and red meat comes into the house. He also starts preaching if he sees me eating whole grains. They kind of expect me to eat whatever is put in front of me as well. I'm also into big breakfasts and they're not, so every morning it's, "I don't know how you can eat that much this early."0
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I'd ask them why do they care what you eat and let them answer for themselves. If it's not interfering with the way they have to cook to be around you, then it should be no problem at all. I'd follow it up with, "I don't have a problem with the way you eat, so I don't understand why you have a problem with mine."
Put it back on them. THEY are the ones who have the problem NOT you. Screw them if they find it annoying. It's your life, it's your choice, it's none of their business. And congrats on your loss!0 -
When I first started at 215 lbs (just shy of being in the obese category),
You must be tall because at 5'4-3/4" tall, 215 I was considered obese; even at the 184 which is my current weight the chart states I am obesed. (Boy that was hard to take after working so hard to lose those 30+ pounds :frown: )0 -
Standoug888 is right. Every time you make a change, a lot of the people close to you are going to criticize it...at least at first. I've never understood this. I've been criticized for my choice of school and degree, but I now work at large law firm making a good wage. I was criticized for my marriage but here we are creeping up on year 2 and almost 9 years together overall.
So naturally everyone started criticizing me for my eating habits. In college, a friend and I were doing P90 and seeing good results after a month when my friend decided she wanted to quit. The rest of that year all my friends wanted to do was eat out at places like Krystal's where all the teeny hamburgers are at least 200 calories and come in a 4 pack. Needless to say we were all gaining weight. When I moved in with my husband, things got a lot easier because my friends spent a lot of time eating and if I didn't eat with them, then I didn't spend time with them. Two of my guy friends were close to 300 and my female friend was hovering around 250. Somehow I luckily never reached the 200 mark and have stayed around 170-180. My husband sometimes criticizes my "rabbit food" but when we go out and I'm checking the restaurant website for nutrition information, he's very supportive. You have to learn to not care what others think because when you start looking great and feeling even better, then they'll have to eat their words.0 -
I wouldn't put up with it. Comments like that would affect me negatively. I would keep other company and if you can't bear that then you have to be very clear with him and absolutely ignore any comments. Tell yourself that they are about him not you. This is just what I would work best for me because I am a very sensitive person and susceptible to suggestion:)0
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Wow, I'm really surprised to hear so many people get flak for eating good food.
I guess I'm lucky. The only comments I've gotten from my husband so far is that it's great that there's always a bowl o salad in the fridge. A lot of my extended family members have fairly specific dietary needs due to various medical conditions so all of our get togethers have an abundance of salads, fruits and veggies along with the chips and hotdogs and no one bats an eye if you don't eat the chips or cake.
When I'm invited to group outings it's usually a vegetarian restaurant, sushi, coffee or tea. Most of the people I spend time with are crust punks and hippies and they tend to eat vegan a lot of the time. Regardless, they're the least judgemental group of people ever.0 -
I must be one of the few with a supportive husband and he does the cooking (he's retired I am not) and has learned to cook food that is healthier for us both; weighs my food portions for me before serving; and tries in every way to encourage me. During my journey to lose weight (I am down 31 pounds since I first started ... although MFP only shows 26 because I lost weight before joining) he too has lost weight.
You need to be who you are, eat how you know will be healthy for you and try to educate your family in a kind/respectful way why you have changed and what you expect to gain out of your new lifestyle. A long, healthier life.
It really is sad to read how many people have family & friends disrespecting their choice of a healthy life.0 -
remember when you make a positive change people will judge you!0
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No, I have not experienced any negative reactions from anyone. I have gotten nothing but support from family and friends, and even clerks at regular places I shop at. My husband has benefited from my healthier eating and cooking and lost a few pounds as well, and he has also gone from pre-diabetic at his regular physical last November to healthy levels. Our daughter calls us her shrinking parents.
I imagine it is difficult to get the types of comments that some receive from the people who mean the most to us. I guess you just try to ignore the negativity and get the support from MFP and friends and family that are truly happy for you and your healthier habits.0 -
Not so much when I was still losing but now that I'm maintaining I have more pressure.
"Come on,you can eat ( fill in blank) You're skinny now" ( I'm not, never have been and do not aspire to be, skinny)
People need to understand,it's not a phase and how do they think I've kept it off for three years?0 -
Yes...and vice versa. Husband paleo's, I slim fast. We are at a mexican standoff. Since February. Nobody's budging but everyone's getting in better shape. I think we may be coming to the conclusion independantly that the method doesn't matter as long as they yield results an are tolerable for us individually.0
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Not so much when I was still losing but now that I'm maintaining I have more pressure.
"Come on,you can eat ( fill in blank) You're skinny now" ( I'm not, never have been and do not aspire to be, skinny)
People need to understand,it's not a phase and how do they think I've kept it off for three years?
Exactly^^^ people always ask me....Are you done yet? I tell them i will never be done. This is a lifestyle change. Meaning the rest of my life. Besides i have no desire to eat like i used to or what i used to.0 -
If you're just minding your own business and tracking your calories it's fine.
However, i'm on the other end of this. I have used MFP for awhile, and have introduced friends to it.
I do not regret it, but now it is all I hear about. How many calories is this or that? Even if it is just coffee they're asking about.
Driving me insane!0 -
Is it just me or does anyone else feel a little scrutinized for changing their diet?
My family, friends and boyfriend sometimes do make snide comments about 'fussy eating' and my brother said something the other day about 'YOUR stupid vegetable healthy stuff'... I mean, I'm currently attempting maintenance as I have lost all the weight I need to, but I am still trying to keep up healthy eating habits which means still eating more vegetables, whole grains, lean meat etc and apparently that makes me a bad person for eating an alternative to burgers and fries!
Does anyone else get this? I don't really know how to deal with it... I hate feeling like I am annoying people but at the same time I want to keep healthy for myself. I had a McDonald's happy meal the other day and my boyfriend said 'I feel a lot happier when you eat fast food!' Great!
Here's how I would deal with your brother. The next time he says "YOUR stupid vegetable healthy stuff..." I would look him in the eyes and say, "STOP IT." Or, a variation, look him in the eyes and say, " i don't appreciate that."
Don't offer an explanation about why you are eating healthy food. I'm sure you've explained that in the past. This advice comes from a book called "The Verbally Abusive Relationship," by Patricia Evans. My take is that your new lifestyle is threatening to some people -- maybe it makes them see their overweight bodies as not so great, etc. Their comments are an attempt to control you and put you down and make themselves feel better. Learn to say, "Stop it!"
For your boyfriend, who says he feels happier when you eat fast food, I would ask him why. Maybe he's insecure and wants you to join in.0
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