Sick of hearing "You have such a pretty face.".......

Hi everyone... this is a big step for me just even being on this site. First off my name is Elizabeth (everyone calls me Doll), I am a 31 year old full time college student and makeup artist. I am originally from Austin, Texas but currently live in Central Arkansas. I have been overweight since I was about 17-18 and even before that I felt "fat" even though looking back I was anything but. I am in a serious relationship and we have been talking about "the future" and I realized that I don't want to be a "fat" bride. I don't want to have to special order my gown without even being able to try it on. All my life I have had people tell me "You have such a pretty face!" but I have never truly felt beautiful and I think my weight is really the issue for me.

Every year I tell myself, well if I would have started this time last year where would I be and I am sick of doing that to myself!!! I am 5' 11" and weigh over 350 pounds... that's not cute! I decided that I couldn't continue to always be the "biggest" person in the room so I went out and bought a scale, weighed myself at home and cried for about an hour. I had no idea that I had gotten this heavy! I mean of course I know I'm heavy but when you're tall and have been heavy for years it sometimes just sneaks up on you.

I don't have many friends who will be workout buddies or really even able to grasp how I feel since most of them have never been this heavy. I have some friends who are a lil thick but no one who is truly overweight. So anyone who may read this in the Conway, Arkansas area who wants to become gym buddies please please feel free to hit me up!!!

I have NO IDEA what I am doing or how to do this but I WILL LOSE THIS WEIGHT!!!!!

<3
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Replies

  • jessiebritt
    jessiebritt Posts: 33 Member
    TOTALLY get it.

    I'm also getting married in a year....so if you want someone to help motivate you, feel free to add me!
  • Wrenbot87
    Wrenbot87 Posts: 100 Member
    Oh man, if I had a dollar for every time I heard that in college I wouldn't have any student loan debt!! I'm 5'10.5 so I usually say 5'11. I was 323 in January and weighed in today at 265! If you're you're ready you can do it!!
  • MeIShouldB
    MeIShouldB Posts: 578 Member
    Hi everyone... this is a big step for me just even being on this site. First off my name is Elizabeth (everyone calls me Doll), I am a 31 year old full time college student and makeup artist. I am originally from Austin, Texas but currently live in Central Arkansas. I have been overweight since I was about 17-18 and even before that I felt "fat" even though looking back I was anything but. I am in a serious relationship and we have been talking about "the future" and I realized that I don't want to be a "fat" bride. I don't want to have to special order my gown without even being able to try it on. All my life I have had people tell me "You have such a pretty face!" but I have never truly felt beautiful and I think my weight is really the issue for me.

    Every year I tell myself, well if I would have started this time last year where would I be and I am sick of doing that to myself!!! I am 5' 11" and weigh over 350 pounds... that's not cute! I decided that I couldn't continue to always be the "biggest" person in the room so I went out and bought a scale, weighed myself at home and cried for about an hour. I had no idea that I had gotten this heavy! I mean of course I know I'm heavy but when you're tall and have been heavy for years it sometimes just sneaks up on you.

    I don't have many friends who will be workout buddies or really even able to grasp how I feel since most of them have never been this heavy. I have some friends who are a lil thick but no one who is truly overweight. So anyone who may read this in the Conway, Arkansas area who wants to become gym buddies please please feel free to hit me up!!!

    I have NO IDEA what I am doing or how to do this but I WILL LOSE THIS WEIGHT!!!!!

    <3


    Aww, there's something I like about you....friend request sent.
  • KeepCalmNGetyaSweatOn
    KeepCalmNGetyaSweatOn Posts: 361 Member
    You can do it hun! It just takes hard work, motivation, dedication, and sacrifice, which all of those qualities you seem to have! I am not anywhere near Arkansas neither am I considered "overweight" in your standards but I would love to support you on here all the way! Send me FR if you'd like. Good luck! :)
  • RoseDarrett
    RoseDarrett Posts: 355 Member
    Don't get down on yourself. You're obviously a great lady who is very loved,have plenty of friends and have a lot of things going for her.
    If you are truly serious about losing weight YOU CAN do it!!! Eat healthy(buy a food scale,you'd be surprised how much food can actually weigh) start with some low impact exercise and try your best to make the right choices food wise.
    I hope you find the workout buddies you want. I wish you all the best!! God luck :)
  • Noflexing
    Noflexing Posts: 60 Member
    i was 6'3'' 296 lbs and dropped down to 207 lbs and gained lean mass to 220 lbs. i'm back on a diet to lean out again. I know exactly how you feel. i've been there. if you ever need any advice let me know.
  • Brownsbacker4evr
    Brownsbacker4evr Posts: 365 Member
    You have an ugly face!

    Is that better????

    hahaha I am totally kidding.

    It is the first thing people will notice most of the time and you do rock a pretty good face, if I do say so myself.
  • Thank you everyone! :smile:
  • mom2dzbnwe
    mom2dzbnwe Posts: 129 Member
    I live near atx now and have extended family all over Arkansas! I'm 5'10" and have been up to 230--twice! Lost 80lbs, then gained it back over 10 years, and now I'm ready to get rid of it again!!! I too have heard, "such a pretty face..." more times than I care to count! When I lost weight before, that was the first time I ever really felt pretty! I mean, I know what I look like, but when you're overweight, it seems like thats all anyone sees! I remember having people tell me how I looked like an entirely different person--and the way people treat you!!!!! I was overweight all my life, even through my teenage years, so to get into a size 8 (smallest Ive ever been) as a 20-something was like a whole new world. The bag boys at the grocery store were nice! The UPS man made small talk! Vendors at work were chatty!
    Anyway, I know where you're coming from! And I'm here for emotional support!!
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
    There are a lot of ugly ppl that I wouldn't look twice at.
    Every time I see a large framed woman with a pretty face, I stare.
    Your on the right track being here and seems you have made a decision to look and feel healthier.
    I stare at all the pretty ppl.
    I appreciate a pretty face.
    I wouldn't complain if I were you, ever! :huh:
  • Sparlingo
    Sparlingo Posts: 938 Member
    At least you can fix your weight issues, but no one can get a new face :wink: :flowerforyou:. I understand what you're saying, though! You'll be the total package when you reach your goals (and you WILL reach your goals!).

    Good luck, and just take this day by day and do your best. It all adds up before you know it!
  • Kassandra772
    Kassandra772 Posts: 52 Member
    I'm not tall but I'm short and fat. I hit the same wall you did a few months ago when I realized that I want a family with my husband and I don't want my weight holding me back anymore. If you would like to be friends on MFP, feel free to add me :)
  • dlanoux
    dlanoux Posts: 112 Member
    Hi! I'm just starting my journey.....again. My weight has been a roller-coaster my entire life.

    I decided that now, it is time to get serious. I will finally graduate form college in December with my BSN (nurse).....my goodness what my patients must think when I give then the "speech" about needing to drop a few pounds. I must look like a total hypocrite!

    Anyway.....I refuse to graduate from college at the weight I am! I want to look nice and wear a dress that is not from a plus size store! So, my journey had begun!

    By the was....I live just north of Austin. :)
  • TheBeerRunner
    TheBeerRunner Posts: 2,777 Member
    A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

    Start slow, you do not need to fully transform your life overnight. Remember that it took time to put the weight on, it isn't going to come off immediately. Taking progressive steps toward a healthy lifestyle will net you lasting results. Best of luck on your journey, feel free to add me if you are looking for supportive friends on MFP.
  • larlo74
    larlo74 Posts: 45 Member
    I would quit beating yourself up with the past coulda, woulda, shouldas. Today is the start of the new you. It all starts with that first little change. My biggest change has been in soda drinking. It used to be three to four cans daily. I began switching to water. Water all day long. I let myself have one at the end of the day, but sometimes I don't want it. Celebrate the little accomplishments.
  • megansarro
    megansarro Posts: 23
    Being "pretty" or "beautiful" is not only measured by your outer appearance but your inner self as well!! You seem like a sweet gal, best of luck to ya!! Friend request sent and anyone else feel free to add me. :)
  • shuki_cotren
    shuki_cotren Posts: 328 Member
    I am very lazy but even I lost weight on myfitnesspal. Just add friends on here that will make sure to keep you motivated. I keep my friends list low (20-40) so that I can get to know everyone and comment on everyone's posts. I post on their profiles, then they post back and motivate me--- it's a good system.
  • jltgraham
    jltgraham Posts: 2 Member
    You are right, it is hard being tall and overweight. I am also 5"11" I was slim for the majority of my life and one day I saw myself and I was the biggest I had ever been. I was close 300 lbs. I realized that I didn't want to go out with friends any longer, I wasn't comfortable in my skin. I had become aware of my size. I used to get upset when someone told me I had a pretty face but in my case it was because I didn't see it. I didn't think I was pretty. So I decided to make changes just as you have. In February I was 291 by April I dropped to 277 and today I am at 262. I joined beachbody and I am still using their programs. I AM NOT A COACH, thought I'd put that out there for other readers. Maybe looking through their website to find something you want to try will help. I use Hip Hop Abs daily, which is pretty much dancing. It is doable at any weight. However, I think you will be successful because you have made up your mind that you want to lose weight, I commend you for that and I wish you the best on your weight loss journey.
  • 9chimera11
    9chimera11 Posts: 40 Member
    At least you can fix your weight issues, but no one can get a new face :wink: :flowerforyou:. I understand what you're saying, though! You'll be the total package when you reach your goals (and you WILL reach your goals!).

    Good luck, and just take this day by day and do your best. It all adds up before you know it!


    :D That....totally
  • HuskerforLife
    HuskerforLife Posts: 30 Member


    I decided that I couldn't continue to always be the "biggest" person in the room so I went out and bought a scale, weighed myself at home and cried for about an hour. I had no idea that I had gotten this heavy! I mean of course I know I'm heavy but when you're tall and have been heavy for years it sometimes just sneaks up on you.

    This is EXACTLY how I feel. I used to kind of maintain my weight sticking around 190 (Not skinny, but hey I stayed there) and now the numbers are creeping up. I'm at 226 and I'm 5'6"

    This is the first time I feel dedicated to making a healthier me. My "get your *kitten* in gear" moment came yesterday when my husband inadvertently called me fat. He really didn't mean it or flat out say, "you're fat," but it did make something click in my head.
  • I am so glad that I found this site!!! You all are so sweet with your comments and messages and we are obviously all here for a lot of the same reasons!
  • kmshred
    kmshred Posts: 393 Member
    ew i hated that. got it all the time. it was such an insult.
  • diamondgirl50
    diamondgirl50 Posts: 71 Member
    Welcome! I am in a similar boat as you and have tracked my food with MFP off/on for a year or so. About 10 days ago I got serious....I mean come on! It is just time to get this done. It is not rocket science :) So I started walking. After being fairly sedentary
    over the past 5 years and at 342 pounds those 2 laps around the track were pretty painful and really sllllooooowww. I have lost 8 pounds, albeit water weight or not....that needed to come off too. Today I pressed to my first mile! The first of a kajillan to come as I gain strength, stamina and my health.

    Feel free to friend me. I am just now starting to utilize the support part of this site....think its gonna be pretty sweet. And for this season I am in AR too taking care of my mom...about an hour or two north of you. Good luck as you launch out into this journey and know your not doing it alone!
  • Brownsbacker4evr
    Brownsbacker4evr Posts: 365 Member
    I agree with what an above poster said. You can fix the weight issue, but ya can't fix ugly. I know this firsthand! lol, so i'd say be glad you already got a great face. You just now need the body you want to go with it and you'll be a full package deal!
  • Gabrielm80
    Gabrielm80 Posts: 1,458 Member
    Hi everyone... this is a big step for me just even being on this site. First off my name is Elizabeth (everyone calls me Doll), I am a 31 year old full time college student and makeup artist. I am originally from Austin, Texas but currently live in Central Arkansas. I have been overweight since I was about 17-18 and even before that I felt "fat" even though looking back I was anything but. I am in a serious relationship and we have been talking about "the future" and I realized that I don't want to be a "fat" bride. I don't want to have to special order my gown without even being able to try it on. All my life I have had people tell me "You have such a pretty face!" but I have never truly felt beautiful and I think my weight is really the issue for me.

    Every year I tell myself, well if I would have started this time last year where would I be and I am sick of doing that to myself!!! I am 5' 11" and weigh over 350 pounds... that's not cute! I decided that I couldn't continue to always be the "biggest" person in the room so I went out and bought a scale, weighed myself at home and cried for about an hour. I had no idea that I had gotten this heavy! I mean of course I know I'm heavy but when you're tall and have been heavy for years it sometimes just sneaks up on you.

    I don't have many friends who will be workout buddies or really even able to grasp how I feel since most of them have never been this heavy. I have some friends who are a lil thick but no one who is truly overweight. So anyone who may read this in the Conway, Arkansas area who wants to become gym buddies please please feel free to hit me up!!!

    I have NO IDEA what I am doing or how to do this but I WILL LOSE THIS WEIGHT!!!!!

    <3

    So many things that can be addressed. First off I noticed you said you have always felt fat, even though you look back and you can see looking back you felt you were fat even when you weren't. That says volumes. That is going to be something that is going to kill you motivation. Because it seems to me even if everyone tells you how much thinner you look it might not be good enough in you eyes and you will be that voice in your head that causes doubt that this isn't even working. So the best thing to do for yourself is to make this about your health. Want to be a healthier you. I know I might battle with my weight all my life, even while working twice as hard as someone else. I can't control that. I can't decide what the magic formula and guarantee I will be my goal weight all the time. What you and I can control is making good choices most the time, be conscience of our choices and keep track of our good days and bad days. This community works so well because it tries to have you loss slow enough that you body doesn't go into starvation mode, in which it tries to store as much energy as efficiently as possible. This tries to prevent a yoyo effect. It's ok you don't know what your doing. Most come into MFP with bad habits picked up from past diets that just don't work in the long run.
    I suggest before you commit to a set amount of calories you read up on this.
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/931670-bmr-and-tdee-explained-for-those-needing-a-guide
    That explains how important figuring out your tdee number is.
    What's your tdee you ask. Well it is your amount of calories you need to neither gain or lose weight. So knowing that number is mega important.
    That said when you become healthier I hope you look at your pretty face and find it. Sounds like you have somebody that loves you and thinks of you more than just a pretty face. Find the you they see because once you have you won't be the voice tearing yourself down in the mirror even once you lose weight. Good luck and enjoy this experience. If you need an extra friend and don't mind I'm a guy send me a friend invite.
    Waving from Texas - Gabriel
  • USCEE77
    USCEE77 Posts: 50
    It reminds me of a Cheers episode when the Coach (the old guy behind the bar) was trying to talk his daughter out of marrying a big jerk. She said, "Dad, look at me, be honest, tell me what you see!" Coach said, " I see your Mother, you are beautiful just like she was." I still get teary eyed :cry:

    Find the ONE thing that motivates you, and you will achieve your goal. And remember, it's a marathon, not a sprint. Good luck!
  • ashleyShades
    ashleyShades Posts: 375 Member
    Well, you do have a pretty face!
  • Don't people know that anyone who's pretty has a pretty face? That's just pretty! YOU'RE PRETTY!

    Best of luck. We're in this together!
  • kohldawg9
    kohldawg9 Posts: 13
    "Find the ONE thing that motivates you, and you will achieve your goal. And remember, it's a marathon, not a sprint. Good luck!"

    Love this!!!!

    Find a picture of the wedding dress you want to wear.....post it everywhere. Fridge, cupboards, bedroom door, closet....everywhere you want to post it. I find reminders like that helpful to keep me motivated :)

    Enjoy the journey and everything that you learn about yourself and your body along the way!!
  • holliebevineau
    holliebevineau Posts: 441 Member
    congrats on chooseing to change your life with mfp!!! Welcome! You will be a beautiful bride from head to toe.