'Former fatties'

joselo2 · June 2013

Hello,
Here is a question, for people who used to be really obese, and now are slim; people who losts looooadsa weight (because I hope to be amongst your number one day!!)

When you meet new people, how do you feel bout them knowing you used to be really big? Not like you going to announce it soon as you meet, but like, would you mind them seeing pics of how you were in the past etc. If it came up in conversation, would you mention your experience? How do people react? Are they shocked? Good reaction/bad?

I am just curious. I hope I will never be ashamed of what ismy current self, because I don't think it would be very kind of future me to be embarrassed by me. I'd hate to think of anyone else embarrassed by me! But I dunno what it's like and ho ppl respond.

any thought?? xxxx

bethany41h · June 2013

I haven't lost a so much weight that I would not consider my slim - BUT I do get a lot of reactions about my weight loss and though I look at pics of myself and I am somewhat ashamed.. I am also very proud of myself. Having done nothing about it would be the biggest thing to feel shame about, I suppose. But I feel a lot of pride about what I've done and I am usually happy to whip out some pics lol

WVmom24 · June 2013

Although I've gained some back, at one point I was down 80lbs. I went from a size 24 to a size 12, which is the smallest I got. To this day I refuse to show anyone pictures of how big I used to be (except on this site). I have no problem saying I lost a lot of weight, but showing old pictures would take a lot of time and trust. Most people are very congratulatory and happy for me when I tell them, so I don't think it would take me long to bring it up with a new dating prospect.

oohmercyme · June 2013

I'm torn. In one way I don't want anyone who never knew me as a fattie to know I was a fattie. On the other hand, there is so much shame around being fat and I don't want to carry that shame- so I have recently posted my before and after pic on Facebook and a running forum as a way of me trying to not see my former self as someone to be ashamed off. (Plus 118lbs later, I have a lot to be proud of).

lee91356 · June 2013

I have lost a lot and though I dont feel slim I am constantly told that I am lol. About feeling "ashamed" of being obese (well I was "morbidly obese") its more like I knew that I was big before but I never realized HOW BIG I was until I started losing. At this time I can fit into one leg of my pant! I'm not "ashamed" as if I hide it, its more like I'm embarrassed that I never realized how bad my weight problem was until it got that bad. I sometimes want to tell people who have never known me at my biggest about my weight loss but at the same time I dont, because after a lifetime of being the "big girl" I dont want to be associated with my weight any more, and I'd rather people not know about it until or unless I feel its important. At first I felt like I was somehow lying to them but then I realized like other people without weigh issues, its not something your looked at when your at a more normal weight.

I have plenty of pictures and sometimes I share them with people and other times I dont. Its a personal thing. Some people like to shout it from the rooftops and are fine with everyone knowing and others are like me prefer to keep it to themselves and only discuss it on occasion. Also I dont want like being peoples weight loss "guru" and I hate when I'm asked about my regiment and what I do - and then sometime criticized for the choices I make or dont make. I'm doing this not just to lose weight but more importantly to keep it off so the choice I make are for my long-term benefits and I hate trying to explain that to people (e.g. I sometimes "cheat" and I eat cracker but not bread). When things move along and the get closer to your goal you'll know and do what feel right for you.

Good luck and keep at it!

postrockandcats · June 2013

I don't introduce myself as "Sarah, the former obese woman," I just talk about it if it's appropriate in conversation. Today at work, for example: I was talking to one of my cashiers and we were talking about vanity sizing. I said that vanity sizing was convenient for me when I was heavier because I got into misses clothing faster, making it easier to find clothing.

My cashier looked at me like I had seven heads and said "you are NOT plus-sized, though." She didn't believe me that I was 240 before until I showed her a picture.

TL;DR: I don't care if people know I used to be larger. It's part of my history and I'm not going to hide it as I'm not ashamed (although, I was embarassed at the time and refused to call myself fat). I'm no better a person than before, just one with a higher Kohl's Card balance from all my new clothes :P

PS- I don't consider myself "slim," just slightly overweight. Not to mention a fair bit healthier from my obese days!

fittocycle · June 2013

I'm pretty open about it. I lost 70 lbs. during my senior year of high school. It's been about 35 years since and I have gained and lost some weight. I've never gained back more than half, even through two pregnancies. Sometimes the topic of weight comes up and sometimes it doesn't. If it does, I want people to know it can be done and it is possible to maintain a healthy weight! So many people want to just throw in the towel.:flowerforyou:

tam_a_ram_a · June 2013

I'm pretty open about it. Nobody believes me until I show them pictures, and then they still don't believe me.

tam_a_ram_a · June 2013

People call me skinny all the time, and I don't feel like I am. I don't have an eating disorder or anything, but I don't see a slim person when I look in the mirror. I guess it's just me being self-conscience since I was so uncomfortable in my own body for so long.

bonbonjs · June 2013

I started getting chubby near the end of primary school, then lost it, then got *extremely* chubby in my senior years of high school. Luckily I wasn't ever really bullied or picked on at school, regardless of my weight. I began losing weight as soon as I moved out of home and had to fend for myself. From memory, my largest was 110kg - I am now 62kg.

When I meet people who are struggling with their weight I do enjoy telling them (to their disbelief) that I used to be big. But I don't go advertising it otherwise! I'm ashamed to say it, but I prefer to forget that part of my life. Here are some of my (somewhat silly) issues I have as a former fatty:

1. People I've known for years have forgotten that I used to be bigger and now make fat jokes etc around me (grr. I try and avoid these types)
2. Even though it's been a few years since I lost the bulk of my weight, there are still those token one or two people who just can't seem to get over it and like to remind me, and everyone else around, "how much junk in the trunk" I used to have every time I see them (which again, I've made sure is hardly ever

)
3. I get more negative comments about my diet and fitness now than I did back then. There is no crime in wanting to be happy, healthy and comfortable in my own skin as opposed to miserable, sluggish and awkward... right?!

xLoveLikeWinterx · June 2013

I've been all over the board, but at my heaviest was 294 and now I'm 152ish. Lost down to 138 and bounced up, so just trying to get back down there again, but... Losing 140+ pounds is a TRIP. I don't care if people know per se, but the person I was then is miles away from the person I am now, so it feels strange to talk about it. I almost feel like I don't have anything in common with that old me. My awesome boyfriend/fiance knows and loves me anyway (because I had to explain exactly WHY I have so much extra skin).

LilMissDB · June 2013

The first time I lost a lot of weight (50kg), I wasn't ashamed at all to show before pics to new people and I don't think I was judged by them. I think they were all surprised and/or impressed. I will say though, that I don't think the people that knew me before I lost the weight EVER stopped seeing me as a fat person, even though I maintained a very slim weight for over 5 years (which was my whole adult life at the time). When regained 20kg people I knew before were still telling me I looked like I had lost weight, even though they spent loads of time with me when I was skinny!

lacroyx · June 2013

Online I am very open about it. Real close friends and family, they know. Offline, it's a different story. I am a bit shy to begin with and don't like being the center of attention. I'd could never been a actor or do public speaking. The gym I have been going to for nearly 2 years, I know quite a few people there and only 2 people know and I haven't showed them before pics either. I'm not scared but I just don't really talk about it unless others ask.

Iron_Lotus · June 2013

I have lost just about 90-100lbs over my life and most people don't know how heavy I was and I am pretty embarrassed by it and the pictures. I have been on MFP on and off for about 2 years and I just recently, like last week posted my heavy pics in my profile. It is very hard for me to show people those pictures.

LoudmouthLee · June 2013

I'm an attention *kitten*, and I have been cast for TV game shows previously...

In that type of situation, I milk the hell out of my weight loss. I can overcome anything. Bring the pain. Bring the ruckus.

When I meet people for the first time, I choose not to tell them, unless it comes up organically in conversation.

It's really awkward going into the diner by my house, and the staff showing my before and after pictures to other patrons (I've been going there for years)

moxiecowgirl · June 2013

I'm only halfway to my goal, so I wouldn't say I'm slim YET, but I'll definitely qualify once I get there!

I may be the rarity here...I'm not at all shy about talking about my surgery and what I had to do before and after to lose the weight. I carry a picture of my "former" self in my wallet. It's not like I'm beating people over the head with it, but if it gets brought up in conversation, or if I hear someone say weight loss surgery is a quick fix or, worse yet, doesn't work, then they're likely to hear about it. I'm a huge advocate for lifestyle change. My surgery was just part of the tool box. I've lost so quickly and so well because of the changes I implemented alongside that. I've kinda taken it on as my personal mission to educate others about how they can change their lives, too, with or without surgery, since it's not for everyone.

I will say this much, though: I'm finding that, the further I get from that higher end of the scale, the more of a mental disconnect there is from the girl I was when I started out. I'm a singer, and I have some old performance videos that I look at now, and I'm just sad for that girl. She looks so...heavy. Not just physically, but spiritually and emotionally. She looks beaten down. Nothing like me now. I have a hard time reconciling the two sometimes, but it sure makes an effective way to demonstrate the changes once someone gets me talking about it!

bregalad5 · June 2013

I'm only 1/3 of the way to my goal, but considering I've already gone from a size 22 to a size 12, I already look like a completely different person. I'm not shy about my weight loss if things come up in conversation(I don't go telling everyone... I'm super shy, so people are lucky I'm even talking to them!!), and will show people my before picture that I have in my profile here. Being open about things has helped me a lot

mandylgibbs · June 2013

WELL.... I'm not slim but I am definitely getting the point that I can see I'm comfortable with my size. When i started all this I was 336 pounds. I've lost 73 pounds now, and I'm a bit of a gym rat.

I talk about it because it is who I am. I always have a progress picture on my phone, and I'm not ashamed. It was freaking hard to get to this point, and I want people to see me as a strong confident person because I am.

atb0821 · June 2013

I'll bring it up if it comes up in the conversation. Mostly, people say "what?! You were fat?!" I don't have any before pictures that I carry around or anything, so I just tell people my high weight and it usually blows their minds.

I'm almost scared to let my husband see pictures of me at my biggest, because I wonder if it'll "taint" how he sees me. It's one of those things you can't unsee!

mlogantra76 · June 2013

Like others have said, I share it where appropriate. I do NOT bring it up if there is an obese person in the room especially as I don't want to make them feel bad. My current coworkers didn't know me obese so the majority of them have no clue. I lost 120 lbs 10 years ago and its only in the last 1.5 years, that I have regained 25 lbs. So, my coworkers are noticing me lose the 25 lbs and that kinda opens things up for me to tell about my past history. I am definitely not ashamed of it. Not at all. I'm proud that I was able to lose the weight and have kept the majority of it off! Right now, I'm proud that I admitted to myself that I had regained 25 lbs and I decided to do something about it. I am getting close to being at goal again and it feels amazing. I might show a few pictures to my favorite fitness class instructor to see her reaction:)

sweetpea129 · June 2013

For me its a combination of wanting to tell people because im proud but also being embarrassed and ashamed that i let myself get to that point. I was morbidly obese and wore a size 22. Now i'm a size 8. So definitely a big difference. I look at pictures of my old self and they make me sad. Sad because I feel like i have nothing at all in common with my old self. My new self loves my new life, loves eating healthy, loves being so motivated. The old me would have rolled her eyes at people like the new me. But, at the same time, i'm insanely proud that i've done something that so many people would kill to do. Sometimes i share with people who are wanting support and motivation. I actually love sharing in those situations if i can help someone. Otherwise, i prefer for people i just met to not know that i was obese.

'Former fatties'

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