Unhappy about Weight Loss (5'7)

Options
135

Replies

  • slowglitchen
    slowglitchen Posts: 30
    Options
    Not to be rude, but you have a nice body, I think you need to work on your mental...

    I agree w/ a post abt delusional.. be grateful w/ the body you have, and things you can do w/ it...

    People can say all kinds of things to us, in my situation, I have to learn to love myself, and be grateful.. I have tons of rolls on my body, I would love to have yours... but oh well, I deal w/ it, and accept my own, and love it.. People have different opinions of others, we can't live to their expectations... work on your thought life.. :(
  • RobynLB83
    RobynLB83 Posts: 626 Member
    Options
    You have an absolutely gorgeous body. Great proportions, long and lean, and wonderfully shaped. I don't know where your horrible self image came from, but fixing that is what you need to be putting work into. If you don't have the means to see a psychologist, then look into a support group for EDs and see if they have any workshops or resources for working on body image. You should not have to suffer like this.
  • kbeech06
    kbeech06 Posts: 328 Member
    Options
    Wow, I would kill to have a body like yours! Funny thing is, I did when I was your age...5'7" and I was 132 pounds. I too thought I was fat. Now looking back at pictures and such from then, I think to myself, damn I looked good! Could I have done some toning to look better...hell yes, but I was definitely NOT FAT...and neither are you.
  • SpazQ
    SpazQ Posts: 104
    Options
    I want to see fat rolls too.

    Are YOU seeing the same picture we are seeing? Apparently not.
  • evemarie123
    evemarie123 Posts: 5 Member
    Options
    I think your problem is more mental than physical - see a shrink instead of looking for compliments on here.
  • amandammmq
    amandammmq Posts: 394 Member
    Options
    Reading through your post, I saw words like "unhappy", "depressed", "disgusted", "saddened", "ugly", "hideous", "unworthy", "stuck", "trapped", and so on.

    I do remember that for me, transitioning from a skinny, young teenaged body (I was maybe 125 pounds at 5'11" at one point in my mid teens before I got any hips or curves) to a more womanly shaped body was a very difficult time for me. The curves felt unnatural, and the extra flesh on my hips and butt seemed gross to me. However, they are normal and natural for an adult woman.

    i"m wondering if the putdowns you have received from others in your life, plus having a hard time transitioning to a more womanly shape are exacerbating your self image issues even further. I gently suggest seeking counseling.

    In the mean time, there is nothing wrong with exercising regularly to maintain fitness and improve muscle tone, although at your height and weight, I would not expect to lose a lot of weight. Weight lifting might shift some of your body from fat to muscle, but a goal of 110 (I saw this in another one of your posts) is drastically unrealistic for your height as an adult woman.

    Best of luck to you; I hope you are able to use some more positive adjectives to describe yourself in the near future! I"m hoping for words like "strong" "happy" "hard working" "successful" and that you show yourself more loving kindness. :heart:
  • YourLotusFlower11
    YourLotusFlower11 Posts: 90 Member
    Options
    Body dismorphia .. U hv a nice body enjoy it .. It wont last forever!
  • Fugeela
    Fugeela Posts: 96
    Options
    I appreciate all of the replies. I'm not on a computer at the moment to post the photos I would like but will do when I get a chance, will also reply individually when I am able to also.

    I've been very repulsed with myself and my appearance for years, and at most I am happy to be "healthy" as some people are not, some people do not have the abilities because they were born with bone defects and so forth so I wanted to clarify my love for everyone despite how anyone looks because that doesn't matter to me, it's the person. I will say however I despise the way I look, and my body saddens me. I want to have a body like someone as Emanuela de Paula, or Lauryn Hill in the ninetys, she was fit. I'm not even sure I want their bodies, I'm just sure that I admire theirs and other women's bodies an then feel helpless because I am trapped in my own skin, and ultimately that's my problem. I feel I can never escape these feelings of being the outcast, or being the ugly overweight girl others portrayed me to be. I just feel like a personality, who has been trapped inside a body and an image for years due to harsh comments and a lack of self. I've always wished and never attained. I feel horrible next to my friends around men on the rare occasion I go out, because I know they're beautiful in an out and appeal physically first while I do not. My number on the scale may not reflect a large one but for me, I still feel the same. I hate wing this size, I still feel too big and too ugly. ( Ugly and fat are horrible words and I cringe whilst typing them because they're so nasty and cruel, and so negative. Also, they're not synonymous at all, but I feel that I am I attractive despite my weight- so I don't believe I base beauty on a number or my weight more so on how I feel inside. I often don't know if my issues lie within me not liking how I look or constantly feeling not good enough for anyone, more importantly myself.

    I feel mean and horrible saying these things because I am worthy like anyone else, and I see a very sad person who wishes they appealed to someone or even their self. I don't even know if I truly want someone else's body, I think I do, and don't hesitate to say I dislike mine and how I hate it, but I just wish I were better. And constantly seeing my flab or how clothes fit on me bothers me. I tell myself most girls don't have such problem. I don't enjoy clothes shopping because it makes me feel worse, nothing looks nice on me nor does it look the way I want it to look, and that bothers me. I want to be healthy and fit, but as said, I still feel I have a lot more weight to lose and it saddens me that it's never enough, or I'll probably still have this body and these problems.

    image-1.jpg


    This is a picture of my back, and rolls, I also don't like how broad my shoulders are but that does not bother me as I cannot change that.
  • Fugeela
    Fugeela Posts: 96
    Options
    I'll reply individually when I am on a CPU, appreciate the replies.
  • herblackwings39
    herblackwings39 Posts: 3,930 Member
    Options
    I would like to second the recommendation to look into therapy. You appear to have a very attractive figure and are at a healthy weight. Have you considered working with weights and resistance to help with changing your shape and tightening up a bit? I honestly can't see you losing 20 lbs and being happy.
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    Options
    God created each of us as unique individuals and loves us because we are his children not because of our outward appearances.
    "The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart."
    1 Samuel 16:7
    You have unique talents, gifts and abilities.
    How you look does not equal WHO you are.
    What's in your heart?
    Begin to appreciate the special, beautiful person God has made you to be. :flowerforyou:
    He doesn't want any of us to hate ourselves.
  • shellylb52
    shellylb52 Posts: 157 Member
    Options
    Your body is already fit and beautiful. Time to make your mind fit. Once they're in sync, you'll be on top of the world! :flowerforyou:
  • Puffingmuffin
    Puffingmuffin Posts: 76 Member
    Options
    I'm 5"7 too and 122 pounds. Personally you look much better than me, at least you have boobs. I think you look fantastic. I dislike my tummy because of the fat rolls when I sit. Is that what you are referring to? We can never be satisfied with our shape and instead of taking it out on yourself, just go and workout that negative energy. Maybe confide in a friend or boyfriend.
  • annasor70
    annasor70 Posts: 187 Member
    Options
    People get so obsessed with a number on the scale. That means NOTHING! What matters are measurements and how you look.
    I can't help but feel there is some attention seeking going on here? If you were so insecure how would you even be able to post half naked pictures of yourself on here!?
    I think you know you look good but are fishing for compliments by putting it all out there.
    If that is not true I apologize. Obviously you look great, these are not rolls, they are lines which occur when a human being twists and bends. If this didn't happen you would be a plastic mannequin not made of flesh.

    You weigh barely more than me and I am 5 '6"
    I think you know you look fine.
    Are you a performer of any kind...I know that there is a different normal for example in the dance world. I take a lot of ballet and in the ballet world I am "big" but I know that is NOT the real world. In the real world you and I both look good!

    If you genuinely think you are fat and ugly, yes, you need help!
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,372 Member
    Options
    Go see a therapist. Honestly. And start lifting weights or something.
  • SteelySunshine
    SteelySunshine Posts: 1,092 Member
    Options
    This is the saddest thing I have ever read here. Granted I have not been a member for very long relatively speaking. But it is really sad. So many things go through my mind reading this. And then some of the comments are shameful some suggesting that you are fishing for compliments. I don't think this is the case at all. In fact I don't think compliments even register in your head not even one little bit. I think thousands or even millions of people could say you look great and you are at a healthy weight and some how you would still see rolls where they are not, bulges that don't exist, and you would still insist you need to lose 20 more pounds just to make sure you are firmly in the underweight category.

    But, this is the reality. If you keep trying to lose weight it can cause you serious medical problems up to and including death. No one wants to see that happen to you. Luckily you probably haven't developed an eating/exercising disorder yet. But, you do have a skewed vision of yourself. And that will not change without you seeking help to change it. I would recommend lifting and exercising to firm up or whatever, but I don't really trust that you won't also be trying to eat at a deficit and at your weight that is a totally horrible idea. At this point I feel like your survival is at stake and I also feel very hopeful for you even if I am very alarmed. I feel hopeful because you are able to articulate your feelings very well. And even though most people can't understand how you feel given the way you look, it's still a good thing that you can do this. If you can talk to a person in real life the same as here it will go a long way into helping. I don't suggest talking to anyone in your family, because I have no idea who the people that have abused you are, it goes without saying you don't want to seek help from an abusive person. I don't know what your friends are like either. I do know this however you need to be around positive people. Get involved with people that have a common interest that has nothing to do with your weight or how you look. If you like photography or something like that go out and explore that as a hobby and fine others that have the same hobby. It really doesn't matter what it is, just so long as it's something that will stretch your mind creatively and keep some focus off of the way you believe you look. And therapy lots of therapy. Otherwise this can spiral out of control rather quickly.
  • Fugeela
    Fugeela Posts: 96
    Options
    IMG_7573.JPG
    image.jpg
    IMG_7629.JPG
    I'd much rather have a frame like this young lady, though I am not sure who she is, her body is much better than mine. I'd wish I'd have hers. As pathetic as I feel saying that, I must be honest.

    These are photos from August and September. I was very happy around here, in general, because I just came back from a long stay overseas. But this was my body then. I can cry looking at this.
    image201209100011.jpg
    f22c4417-249a-4769-ad82-3fbb9b987a90.jpg
    5421b63e-92dc-4c05-a788-58fa5c1ce75b.jpg

    I honestly am at a point where I don't know what to do. I know I can't give up but I just feel I will never get there, to where I will be beautiful, to where my body won't atrocitize me. I feel repulsed looking at many photos of myself, and I hate getting into this spiral. It was just a few months ago I was feeling positive about my weight loss and my fitness/health journey, now I am back to feeling helplessly hideous in this skin, this face, and this body. I am trying to get better.

    I think life should be a pleasurable experience these things do not matter, health is in the mind and soul-not just physical. However, at this point, i just feel very sad, and unimpressive. I don't know what to do, I exercise, I eat well, though both could always be improved-and nothing happens. I just cannot help but to break down and cry or feel anger within me for having to be stuck in this flesh. However, when I say these things I wince at the same time because I am just wanting to be loved by myself, and I see a very sad girl when I look at myself but yet one who is happy and has potential. I see both, but I see the sadness first because that's something that over-shines everything else.
  • Fugeela
    Fugeela Posts: 96
    Options
    I'm 5"7 too and 122 pounds. Personally you look much better than me, at least you have boobs. I think you look fantastic. I dislike my tummy because of the fat rolls when I sit. Is that what you are referring to? We can never be satisfied with our shape and instead of taking it out on yourself, just go and workout that negative energy. Maybe confide in a friend or boyfriend.

    Thank you and everyone else for responding to my thread, all the words and advice or feedback is appreciated. I don't have a boyfriend, as I'm sure I attract no one, which is okay also. But confiding in friends about this leaves me with comments that anger me such as "You are fine the way you are, you are not ugly, you are not fat, you dont need to lose weight," Which are all comments that sadden me more infact because the way I look now is unacceptable when I see myself. The way I've looked has always been unacceptable, and I am proud of becoming a healthier person, but it still hasn't made me truly happy about the way I look. It could be better, I have horrible rolls in my back and flab/fat everywhere that really bothers me within. I will not give up, but I do not know what to do. I would like to look better.]

    Or something other than this, much better. I feel trapped, somedays. I appreciate your kind words, have a great day, and I will try my best to message everyone as I have proper cpu access now.

    :)

    Take care. x
  • Fugeela
    Fugeela Posts: 96
    Options
    I would like to second the recommendation to look into therapy. You appear to have a very attractive figure and are at a healthy weight. Have you considered working with weights and resistance to help with changing your shape and tightening up a bit? I honestly can't see you losing 20 lbs and being happy.

    I think if I lose 20 pounds, maybe I'll feel a bit better in terms of knowing I am not near an overweight category, though I am not now, I still feel and look overweight. One can be overweight and be healthy so the scale is the defeatist in fact. However, I just hate the way I look, and I want a smaller frame. I don't even truly know what I'm aiming for number wise or body wise, I just dislike mine. I have tried weights but get saddened when I get no results and depress myself with trying to do more cardio so maybe I can get small first and then tone. but I just can't stand seeing this flab and skin everywhere.
  • lkelicious
    lkelicious Posts: 2
    Options
    Girl all you need to do is tone up

Categories