Ive lost the weight, but feel like an imposter...

You are not an imposter! You worked hard and have done an amazing job. Enjoy the compliments and flaunt what you have worked so hard for. I know sometimes it's hard to believe that the person in the mirror is really you, but it is! And you should celebrate yourself everyday

:noway: 150?! You ARE a rock-star!

I'm sure the reason that people are looking at you is because you're HAWT. They don't know what you've achieved or where you once were. They're probably thinking "man, I wish I looked like that" or "WOW! She's got her stuff together!" or they could be jealous

I understand where you're coming from, though. It's hard to adjust our thinking when we've come from being someone that was once so hard on ourselves. Remind yourself each and everyday that you did it! That you're beautiful, and healthy. Maybe some positive thinking and up-building thoughts will help your brain catch up with your now BANGIN' body.

I get you i am always going to see myself as that sad 230 lbs woman that was dumped by her boy friend for being over weight. I still cant get used to being able to wear and do things i didnt or couldnt back then. I gained a lot of weight back as a result dont allow yourself to get back in that hole

Have you ever read about body dysmorphia? When your mind doesn't register what is reality, you have dysmorphia. Some people have mild dysmorphia, and some people can lose 150 pounds and look in the mirror and still see themselves as 300 pounds. If you were heavy when you were young, or for a long time, it WILL take your brain time to catch up with your body. The reverse of this happens as well BTW. When a thin person gains a lot of weight, they may still see themselves as thin and seem to be in "denial." Someone else wrote that taking pictures helps ( I agree with this). I've heard of people drawing outlines of themselves on big paper to "see" how big they are. My own experience is that it has just taken time. I am getting better and better at recognizing my new self. It will come to you as well. You are not an imposter, but you have a new normal. And just like every new normal, it takes time to get used to!:flowerforyou:

WOW! I just wanted to say you've done an amazing job. I can't say from experience but I think you will gradually feel more comfortable. Take pride in your accomplishment!

its interesting that you use the word "imposter". like you are doing something you shouldnt be. that may be your old 300 lb brain saying, "wait, we cant wear that." i would give yourself some time to let your old brain catch up to your new body. and the best way i can think of to do that is wear the cute clothes, take time to dress yourself up. do the action and your brain will follow.

you did an amazing thing. the more you do the actions, the dressing up, the looking cute, the more confident you will become, and your old brain will catch up.

congratulations! i'm so impressed!

Folks are looking at you because you look like a distinguished adult :flowerforyou:

You should try to look your best no matter how much you weigh.

I'm plenty lazy about how I look on the weekends and I should take better care to wear something respectable when I go out and put a little makeup on.

thanks for your responses...

i wish i could put my finger on why or what makes me feel like this...

confidence or lack of it? wanting to feel good but not feel worthy of such a feeling....

i totally believe in fake it til you make it. you've made it, you just have to believe in it & act the part.

http://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_shapes_who_you_are.html

For me it is hard to get in my head that I'm really going to keep the weight off this time. It feels like people will be watching for me to fail and so I don't 'deserve' this time. I've been thinking all along about maintenance though and seem to understand what it will take. Mostly I feel comfortable with my weight-loss so far, but it is a huge adjustment. You should be so proud of yourself!

Firstly, you are a rock star, and never forget what an amazing achievement you're made.

Secondly, I think it's very normal to feel like you do. I've heard/read lots of other people say the same. I've lost a little over half of what you have, but I have a lot of the same feelings too. It's a very confusing time. I do double takes sometimes when I see my reflection, I still feel like the fattest person in the room, even when I'm the slimmest. I have no clue about what size clothes I should be wearing half the time (it really doesn't help that different brands have different sizes) and I have no clue about what suits me. Sometimes I'll dress up and feel like I'm trying to hard, or showing off, or I'll realise that something doesn't suit me as well as I'd thought it would. Other times I'll dress down more because I just don't have the confidence. I'm finding it hard to find my style really, especially as my body has changed shape, so I have to learn new ways of dressing it.

If I gain a pound or two, I feel enormous, as if I never lost the weight, and yet some days I look at photos and can't believe I was ever that fat. People make little jokes or throwaway comments about me being small (not in a nasty way) and I don't know how to react. A couple of people that I've met since losing the weight have commented that I don't have to worry about weight, or alluded to the fact that I'm thinner than them, and I feel confused because I assumed I was bigger than them.

Confidence definitely doesn't magically appear when the weight is gone. I'm quite a shy person anyway, so I suppose that has something to do with it. I don't know if you've always been overweight, but I think that if you have, (or have for many years) that it can be harder than for someone who is slim for a long time, gains weight, and loses it again. I think they somehow go back to the confident person they perhaps were before; they felt "different" when they were bigger, and had to get back to the old/normal them. When you start off big, it's hard to feel normal when you lose the weight.

It messes with your head, that's for sure. I think your mind does take some time to catch up. I try to just accept compliments etc without thinking about them too much, and accept that there are days when I feel either fat, or uncomfortable, or less confident, and wait for the days when I feel more confident. I think time will definitely help.

thanks for your responses...

i wish i could put my finger on why or what makes me feel like this...

confidence or lack of it? wanting to feel good but not feel worthy of such a feeling....

you probably just use to a different way of everyone looking at you now you are different so the looks are also you must allow yourself to except complements and and know that you did this it wasn't magic!!!!! or a trick!!!!

In my experience as an obese person, being noticed is usually a bad thing. Most of the time people ignore you, but when they notice you, it's not always a good thing. Even if it's harmless, in your mind you project your negative perception and judgements about yourself onto what they must be thinking about you. Now that you are a smaller, healthier you, people "see" you. You no longer have that veil of invisibility and that may be an adjustment for you. You still may be projecting your own feelings, such as feeling like an imposter (in "their" world, perhaps?), onto what they are thinking. As much as I hate the term, you should probably look at your "self-talk". The fact that your feel like an imposter is coming from you, not other people - so, it's something you are telling yourself is a truth about who you are.

Also, you are now able to dress your healthy new body in clothes, that compared to the nondescript clothing you previously wore, probably feels attention-grabbing to you. In reality, you are probably just dressing like a normal person. Give yourself time and continue to ask questions of yourself about how you are perceiving things. Most of all, be proud of your hard work and accomplishment! You EARNED your new body - be proud! (And guess what... it's OKAY to show off!)

I also think losing weight is something you do just for yourself and we are all used to doing so many things for others, ie: children, friends and family in need....that it is hard to accept that you have done something totally for yourself. You can also think of it in a different way.....since you have lost the weight, you have made yourself much healthier and will be around much longer for those you care about and care about you! :-)