bigger now than when i started.

I think part of the problem with people who quit is that they're trying, but they're trying tooooo hard. Hard work doesn't always mean effective work. So you could be going full speed ahead, doing EVERYTHING you can think of to lose weight, but it might not be the RIGHT thing to be doing.

Think of it like you want to take down a tree. You can push against it with all your might, and that's damn hard work, but it's not as effective as using a chainsaw or ax. Of if your car is stuck in the snow, gunning the engine won't work. You'll just get stuck further. But use a shovel and some salt or cinder, and you'll get unstuck.

So that's my advice. Make sure you're making the most of your tools and doing this right. MFP is a great tool to help you have an appropriate calorie deficit, and to plan your meals instead of just recording them.

Also, making some goals that have nothing to do with weight loss helped me a lot. Personally, I wanted to be able to run a 5k. I told myself, if I could do that, it didn't matter if I lost weight or not, because at least I'd be healthier. And even when the scale didn't do what I wanted it to do, I could still look at the progress I made with running (and later lifting) and see that I was getting stronger, faster, more endurance, etc.

And lastly... take progress photos. Take some now, and no matter how much you hate them, don't delete them. You don't need to show them to anyone else. In a month or two, take more. Then in another month or two, take some more again.

This article helps a lot of people get motivated. A LOT of people who lose a lot, will often lose steam & gain back. But the good news is you can turn it around anytime you want.

The Wt. Loss Minute
By Linda Spangle, RN, MA
February 14, 2011

I'm trying so hard! (Motivation Series)

Becky looked discouraged. As she sank into the chair in my
office, she said, 'I don't know what to do. I'm trying so hard to
lose weight, but I'm not getting anywhere. I can't figure out
what's wrong. Based on how hard I'm trying I should be losing a
lot more than I am.'

As I looked at my notes on our conversations over the past few
weeks, I decided to take a guess at Becky's problem. 'Let's
review a little,' I said. 'How have you been doing with your
eating plan?'

Becky thought for a second. 'Some days are OK, but lots of times
I get stressed or frustrated during the day, and by evening, I
end up having wine or ice cream, or both.'

'So you're not following your plan very well?' I asked. 'I guess
not,' she replied. 'This past week I probably was on my program
only three days. But I'm trying so hard to lose weight!'

'How's your exercise plan going?'

'Not as consistent as I'd like. I only walked two days this week.
By the end of the day, I'm usually so tired that I can't get
myself to do it. But I'm trying so hard to lose weight!'

I glanced back at my notes. 'You also planned to work on your
abdominal exercises, go to a yoga class, and take time each day
for some meditation or reading. How are you doing with those
goals?'

'None of them happened. I'm just so busy, and everything gets in
the way. The days keep getting away from me, and I end up
skipping all of my goals and going to bed.'

But then Becky exclaimed again, 'But, I'm trying so hard to lose
weight!'

Are you seeing yourself in this story? I think we all have times
when we WANT to lose weight, and we convince ourselves that we're
TRYING. But like Becky, we don't follow through with any actions
that would move us toward our goals.

It's like saying you want an 'A' in a class at school, but being
too busy, too tired or too stressed to open the textbook or work
on your research paper. No action equals no outcome.

Interested or committed?

Many of you are familiar with this next concept from Day 2 of the
book '100 Days of Weight Loss' but I think it's one we all need
to be reminded of now and then.

If you tend to start and stop every time you diet, you may want
to look at the difference between being INTERESTED and being
COMMITTED.

Interest slips away quickly

When you're just interested in dieting, you tend to stay with
your plans only until something better comes along. For example,
you may decide that you're interested in losing weight, but when
someone brings doughnuts to work, you quickly go off your diet.

You also depend on seeing results to keep you on target. So, as
long as the scale keeps moving, you stay motivated. But if you
hit a plateau or you don't see much progress for a few weeks, you
may throw your program out the window.

And when you struggle, you blame everyone but yourself. You
accuse your friends of ruining your diet because they eat potato
chips in front of you.

In addition, you fall into 'if only' thinking, saying things
like, 'If only I had more time, more money, a new job, or a
supportive spouse, then I'd be able to stay on my plan.

Committed means NO MATTER WHAT!

When you're truly committed to achieving your goals, you have an
entirely different outlook. Unlike being interested, where it
doesn't take much to detract you from your goals, being committed
means you stick with it, no matter what.

Rather than depending on seeing results to help you stay on
track, you work on keeping your motivation strong, and trust that
results will follow.

And when you struggle, you don't blame circumstances or other
people. Instead, you push hard to stay on your diet in spite of
not having enough money, time, or supportive friends and family
members.

Here's a summary of the differences between interested and
committed:

People who are interested in losing weight

* Stick with it until something better comes along
* Take action only if they "feel like" doing it
* Need to see results in order to stay motivated
* Blame people or circumstances for their struggles
* Easily give up when they face challenges

People who are committed to losing weight

* Stick with their plans no matter what
* Take action whether they feel like doing it or not
* Assume that if they stay motivated, results will follow
* Take responsibility for their own actions
* Keep going in spite of challenges and setbacks

Look carefully at your current efforts. If you say that you're
'trying so hard to lose weight' but you aren't making progress,
you're probably taking the interested approach. If so, strive for
being committed instead. Start adopting a 'no matter what'
attitude, then convince yourself you can stay with your goals
regardless of your daily challenges.

© Linda Spangle, 2011. #0214, Weight Loss for Life, Inc.

For my thinking, this is a fantastic site, there are no rules (well, not many!) but a few guidelines that helped me might be worth noting....

There is no quick fix or easy answer
Immerse yourself in the forums
Surround yourself with people who have the same aims as you.
Track EVERYTHING
Be HONEST with yourself.
Eat under your calorie goal - you will soon learn what are good and bad food choices.
Use the tools and people available - the tools are great, and there are a lot of great people who just want to spur you on.
This is not a diet, it's a lifestyle change

Lastly, to be clear,
THERE IS NO QUICK FIX OR EASY ANSWER

I hope this helps!

What's this "TOMORROW" bit? why wait until tomorrow to start cause tomorrow never comes ya know... start this minute!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For ME...I had tried over and over again but I don't think I REALLY wanted it. This time was it. I wanted it and I'm doing it.

AMEN to that...

Tough love answer here.

Problem is "you're trying". You're not COMMITTING. There's a difference. Until you are sick and tired of being sick and tired and get a backbone instead of a wishbone, you'll keep trying...........and trying.........and trying. Quit trying. Just get it done now.

A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

This. Also, one quote I remember from the Weight Watchers boards..."Being overweight is hard. Losing weight is hard. Chose your hard." Good luck to you!

9. Google 1 pound of fat. Look at that anytime you are tempted to say "I only lost 1 pound this week."

WOW I AM SHOCKED

I see you like beer. Me too!! I think you have to have a long talk with yourself and make a decision. I know it is easier said than done but let's face it ....its all a choice. Before you put anything in your mouth....write it down.....then decide.. is it worth it? I have a huge problem with staying motivated also but I know once you lose your first 5-7 pounds you will get motivated. Also I weigh every day. I know some say not to do that but I weigh every am buck naked and log it in. If I lose, i'm motivated to lose more......if I gain I'm motivated to get it off!! Good luck to you! Be the person you want to be!

Think of it as a lifestyle and not a diet. You need to eat healthily with the occasional treat, so it's sustainable, and get into the habit f regular exercise and moving more until it just becomes a way of life.

I've been doing this for nearly 2 years now, since my daughter was 7 weeks old (although I did exercise prior to being pregnant with her, when pregnant with my son, and for years before that) and I don't find it hard at all now. I eat a decent amount now, whereas before MFP (I've been a member since July last year) I was restricting myself to 1200 calories or less. I also exercise differently. I do more strength training now, and a huge variety of classes, so I never get bored of it.

So I think the trick is to find exercise you enjoy, and you'll find after a few weeks t just becomes habit, and get used to eating healthily.