Insecure in 40's?

Yes, I have done the same thing quite often actually. I think it has to do with a couple of things for me... part insecurity and part feeling silly wearing cute little outfits in the place/small town I live in. I live in a very casual coastal town. I love clothes and fashion though! My usual attire (AKA uniform) now (as a busy Mom) is cute jeans and a shirt - maybe a cardigan as well. Anyhow, I am a lot more insecure about my body... my legs especially. I work out a lot and eat very healthily, but I still have my certain insecurities.... you are not alone!

I wouldn't call it insecure, but I have definately changed my view of what I wear. I no longer wear mini skirts but rock a tight above knee pencil skirt. I am conscious of what is age appropriate to me. It might be time to go shopping for some new clothes!

i feel the same way! in 2006 when i was 37 (i know, not that far from 40's, but technically i wasn't there yet) i had breast augmentation. i made sure to wear every single "boob" shirt i could find (tastefully, of course). i had them. i loved them. i was going to flaunt them. last saturday i went to a wedding. i put on a dress i had worn back then, but changed because the "girls" were busting out. i don't know if i was just self-conscious or thought it was inappropriate, but i don't think i would've thought twice about it a few years back:/ oh god, i'm turning into my mother! lol

I'm by no means insecure - when I turned 40 I actually became more bold & self-assured! I do try to dress more "appropriately" now, though.:glasses:

I agree that it's an age appropriate thing. I can still wear jeans and tee shirts and not worry, but my tops are more loose fitting, my cleavage is a little more discretely covered up. As well, I have my own personal Fashion Police Officer in the form of an 11 yr old daughter. GOD FORBID I should wear anything that might remotely embarrass or humiliate her!! GASP. If it were up to her, I'd be wearing thick cardigans and checkered sports pants.
Oh wait.. I wear those already..

QUOTED BY JUSTBILL:

Well, I don't have a little sundress story to share, but I can tell you that my self image definitely dropped at 40. But mainly because of hair loss... it sucks having a receding hairline staring back at you in the mirror and reminding you of your age. So yeah, I'm gonna guess that it is a pretty natural response to getting older.

I hear you Bill however mine started in the 30's. My hair was thinning. I had put on unwanted weight. I had anger issues. I wasn't happy with life. I had low self esteem. For myself I felt change was in order and I stopped feeling sorry for myself. I started weight lifting; going from 193 lbs to 165 and feeling and looking great. I continued to lift and still am and am around 201 lbs. I shaved my head and figured I wasn't going to look at my thinning hair any longer, let a lone try to hide it which I was and that was ridiculous. To further help with my anger issues I joined martial arts and the combination of that and weight lifting help me vent and become balanced.

I'm 42, soon to be 43. I feel great. I look good. I have confidence. I'm in better shape then most 40 years olds; heck 30 or 20 year olds. I'm focused and ready for what life throws at me because I know I can over come things. Sure I'd like to be younger but I wouldn't want to lose the knowledge I've gained. Sure I would like to have my hair back but that ain't going to happen. I feel young. I feel like I'm 18 years old. I have so much more I want to do in my life and little by little I am trying to make things happen.

40 is just a number, just like 30's was for me. Most of us are here to make a difference in our lives, to make things better. This is no different then how we feel inside; make that difference to.

Oh crap!!..I have 2 yrs left to feel good about myself
I still shop in the Jr section...Shhhhhhh
So far so good..but who knows what will happen down the road..for now at 38 I feel more confident than I ever have

Kim

I'm not sure why, but at 43 I've sort of turned a corner on that whole "don't want to be older" stuff. My oldest son will be starting college next year, and I've found myself in a now-or-never adventurous phase. I mean, I have to get a life for myself that doesn't depend on the kids or the husband. I took up kayaking and am now losing weight and getting fit, so I'm really loving the feeling of independence and personal power I have now. I'm cool with my age and so amazed at how strong we can still be. If you're feeling insecure or depressed, maybe just try one new thing out of your comfort zone, no matter how minor. If it feels ok, maybe take another step. Novelty really does contribute to happiness and confidence. :happy:

my situation is different...I have RARELY wore halters and tanks because of how my arms look...now that I am losing and toning...I can't wait to put on tops to show my arms...not sure if it will be this summer or next summer

I'm 42, soon to be 43. I feel great. I look good. I have confidence. I'm in better shape then most 40 years olds; heck 30 or 20 year olds. I'm focused and ready for what life throws at me because I know I can over come things. Sure I'd like to be younger but I wouldn't want to lose the knowledge I've gained. Sure I would like to have my hair back but that ain't going to happen. I feel young. I feel like I'm 18 years old. I have so much more I want to do in my life and little by little I am trying to make things happen.

40 is just a number, just like 30's was for me. Most of us are here to make a difference in our lives, to make things better. This is no different then how we feel inside; make that difference to.

I wonder if that is different though because your a man? You know the whole men get more incredibly handsome as they mature!

I only wish. I was one hell of a cute guy years ago but find that without hair I'm not as confident in that aspect. My wife and others say I look good but if I didn't work out and was just bald, they'd probably say something different.

For myself, while there are attractive young ladies, I'm drawn more to mature women. With mature women you get what you are looking at; don't have to worry about body changes and such. They have a wealth more life experience, maturity and sexuality. And I can hold a better conversation with them and not have to fake it and seem like I'm interested. Nope, mature women got it going on; they rock.

Not about clothing, no. Something that shows my arms or sholders is absoutely fine with me. I'm lucky that my arms have stayed pretty tight though.

Shorts are an issue--not because I don't think I have good legs, but because I don't think a woman on the downhill side to 50 should be wearing shorts with a 1 or 2 inch inseam anywhere other than the gym or the beach. Shorts are tough because they're only flattering when they fall at certain points on your leg. As I've gotten older I tend to wear a LOT more skirts and dresses and fewer shorts. Still flattering and cool but more age-appropriate.

I am turning 40 this October. I still rock my tube tops and skinny jeans! Of course I have tattooed arms so that always makes me feel covered. In fact I feel naked when I am all covered up. Who I am wears well with my tattoos showing.

No dress, but I know I started feeling my age the last year or so, which for a guy can be an interesting battle with pride, ego, and the innevitablity of life. I can imagine though, how that stupid little dress was just starring at you...mocking your maturity! I have lots of items like that, including my body which seems to like to remind me I am not 18. Sometimes, it likes to pretend to be 18 again, but then wakes me up the next morning with extra aches, pains, and general mayhem.

I get ya!