How much before people begin to notice???

Hi there! My aunt always notices when I lose weight, but she's the only one. I, for one, have no clue whether people look like they have lost weight or not when I see them. Your family might be the same way. Don't let it get you down, and keep working hard. Sometimes I have less motivation to try hard at what I'm doing when people comment about my weight loss. :flowerforyou:

Hey there,

Another thing that can happen is that when you start doing something for yourself and you start to feel and look good, some people don't like to admit that you are being successful - it makes them feel guilty and points out to them perhaps how unsuccessful they are at applying the level of commitment that it takes to make visible change. Most people don't like feeling less than anyone else, so rather than open that can of worms, they choose not to say anything so they don't make themselves feel any worse than they already do - often this is all subconscious behaviour, and if you were to talk with them about it, they wouldn't have a clue.

But something else that can happen is they can become so jealous of you, sometimes even getting cranky at *you* simply because you've changed - like I said, it makes them feel bad because they know they either can't or won't be able to keep up with you - your success simply shows them that change is possible and most people aren't willing to change - it's too uncomfortable for them and they know they wouldn't be able to put up with that sort of pressure before caving in.

But that brings on something else - when you change, it can affect their perceptions of how they should interact with you and so they can sometimes withdraw because they can feel like they don't know you anymore - for example, if you no longer eat burgers, fries and take out meals, or you have limitations when you go to restaurants, they don't know how to cater for you and so it all just gets too hard for them and so they can sometimes even slowly withdraw their interactions and invitations too. Meanwhile you are left feeling that losing weight wasn't the best thing after all and so we can sabotage our success by reverting back to our old habits simply to gain the approval and acceptance of our family and friends.

That's where it takes real courage to stand strong, holding tight to why we wanted to do this in the first place, and not letting anyone steal our dream of a strong, fit, healthy body. If you hang out where other strong, fit, healthy people hang out (like here on MFP) then new friends can be found that are more supportive and that helps you stay strong until you get the support of your family - funnily enough, when you show them how committed you are to your change, it seems they do eventually give up being alienated from you, and sometimes you even inspire them to believe that change is possible for themselves and from there you can begin to share your journey with them and they will applaud your successes because they at least have an understanding of you and what you've been going through - and sometimes this even takes your relationship with them deeper and it becomes more rewarding.

And just one more thing, without sounding rude, maybe they are just so caught up in what's going on in their own world that it doesn't even occur to them to be mindful of your world and what's going on with you. In this case if you don't share with them and bring you excitement to their attention, it would almost be a bit silly to expect that they would even notice - having this sort of expectation would only set you up for disappointment.

So suss them out to see what's going on with them - maybe you need to take a fresh approach to gain the well-deserved acknowledgment that is always good for your soul.

And don't be backward about coming forward! You deserve every compliment you get - that's a terrific result and you should be proud of yourself.

Hope this helps you to stand strong until they finally get their heads around your success. Good on you for sticking with it.

Kind Regards,

Joy.
:flowerforyou:

People didn't start to notice until about 25lbs had been lost...But I definately noticed changes after around 18lbs.

You will find that when you get one compliment....you will receive quite a few from then on!

Remember, the first fat that is lost from the body is the unhealthy, but unnoticeable fat that surrounds your internal organs...once this has been successfully shifted...fat from other areas becomes targeted. I think this may answer the questions regarding people not noticing untill 25lbs plus!

Please don't get dismayed about it....you are doing amazingly...and the compliments WILL come! :flowerforyou: