Going out to eat sucks

I really have to find a way past this while still being able to maintain a healthy lifestyle

you're right. and the key to that is realizing that one meal didn't make you overweight, and one meal isn't going to make you thin. It's a whole lifestyle of overeating that makes you gain, and a whole lifestyle of mindful eating that helps you lose.

Just enjoy the occasional meal out without concerning yourself about the calories. If all your other food choices are logged and accounted for accurately, you should be just fine.

This. ^ And you can even log those restaurant meals as accurately as you can estimate them and then forget about them. (If that keeps them from gnawing at you afterwards as some kind of unfinished task. )

Love the previous response! I, too, have come to dread going out to eat. Since most social occasions involve food, I have also come to decline invitations because I do not want to be in tempting situations. I love the idea of one meal not making you fat and one meal not making you suddenly at your goal weight. My new strategy is too track all my food and exercise and try to not make obsessing about food rule my life!!

As has already been said, I take it one meal at a time. But some advance prep is possible.
1. If it's a fast food joint, I pack my own food in a small cooler to eat and order coffee at the place.
2. If it's a more formal franchise restaurant, I check its website in advance. Most restaurant websites include nutrition facts. That way, I can make an informed decision when ordering, even though the food is not generally what I would eat. Some independent restaurants have websites and nutrition facts as well.
3. If no advance prep is possible, I treat the meal as a special treat and do my best. I log it here as accurately as I can and make sure to go easy the next day on sodium and fat.

+1. To everything but #1. That's a bit awkward IMHO. I just find reasons to not do fast food. It's not good for anyone, anyways. There is always a better place...

Most importantly, check for websites and nutritional information. Heck, I've ended up ordering and loving stuff I thought I'd never like based on calorie count. Tilapia is delicious any which way! :-)

I travel 50%+ of the year for my job. So about 1/2 of the meals I eat in a year are eaten in restaurants, or on the road at least. My trips don't usually involve more than a few days at the same place, and I usually fly, so cooking isn't really an option, and my packing options from home are limited.

You just have to find ways to make it work. A few things I do:

1. Know the plan in advance. I usually am by myself, so I don't have to worry about where anybody else wants to go. But I try and start my day and play my meals out for the entire day - and even log them on MFP first thing in the morning.

2. If I'm on the road for all 3 meals I will usually eat breakfast at my hotel - usually a hardboiled egg, fruit, and 1 piece of toast with PB. Or an egg white omelet (ask for very little oil to be used) filled with veggies, no cheese. Or toast with peanut butter and a banana. If I don't have breakfast at my hotel I'll often do a Starbucks Oatmeal w/ 1/2 of a package of nuts they give you (50 calories) and cut up a banana. Then I'll try to have a lighter lunch - salad with protein, or 1/2 sandwich & salad or something. This frees me up to have a bit of a bigger dinner - steak or chicken or fish with veggies. And sometimes a glass of wine.

3. Simplify your meals when you go out so it's less overwhelming. Grilled chicken or sirloin or grilled shrimp or grilled fish. Ask for sauces on the side, ask for them not to add butter to your fish/meat, which they often finish it off with to add flavor. Avoid things that add calories - sauteed, fried, scampi, etc. Ordering a sandwich on a bun? Ask for no butter on the bun - pretty much everybody adds it.

4. Ask questions! If you aren't sure how something is prepared, ask your server. Do not be afraid to speak up! I customize most meals, and I've found waiters are VERY happy to accommodate or answer questions.

5. For salads, ask for the dressing on the side so you control how much goes on your salad. I personally use a fork and dip the tines into the salad dressing. I've found that doing this I use less than 1 tablespoon on even a full size salad. Doing this means I can still have my beloved full fat ranch without it sticking to my hips.

6. Ask for a box when they bring you your food. You're much less inclined to sit and pick at your food if it isn't in front of you. So box up 1/2 the meal before you even start eating.

7. Enjoy your company! Having conversations during the meals causes you to eat slower, giving your brain more time to register that you're no longer hungry, so you can stop eating before your plate is clean.

8. Does the restaurant have a 'skinny' menu (like Cheesecake Factory) or have healthier items noted on their menu (like Outback?) If so, zero in on those items, and don't 'look around' the menu too much. Reading about a 14 ounce New York Strip Steak can make it sound REALLY good. But if I didn't read about it, I'd be fine not having it. So I just don't explore the menu too much.

9. Share with others! Often when I'm by myself I'll order an appetizer and a side salad. But if I'm with some of my friends we'll each get something that sounds good and split it, or each order a side salad and split an entree.

Note: There is a time and a place to not worry so much about finding every way to shave off a few calories and just enjoy the company and the meal and get back on track the next day. These are things that I do because eating out is part of my lifestyle - it's not a 'special occasion', once in a blue moon type of thing. Treating every trip to a hotel as a 'vacation' mentality is partially what got me to 60+ pounds overweight, so I've had to adjust my mindset. You just can't do that when you spend 150+ days a year in hotels. I'm certainly not great at it - it took me a year to lose 35 pounds, and as you can see I've gained a few back. But I'm fighting the good fight and working hard to finish off this journey the healthy way!

I travel 50%+ of the year for my job. So about 1/2 of the meals I eat in a year are eaten in restaurants, or on the road at least.

Your situation is particularly difficult. When I've had to travel for work I've always been a little on edge. It's worse when I didn't like my job because I was bored and unhappy and felt I was thrust in a situation in which it would be easy to gain weight if I didn't watch it. The ability to order room service lost its attraction quickly. (I also ate out alone, but that's a different kind of problem, even if you don't mind your own company.)

Probably the worst situation was when I had to do some work on a team for a company that owned several fast food restaurant chains. We were working in a windowless room 12 hours a day. I thought that for lunch and dinner we could at least get out and have some nice, healthy food. But the company gave us passes to its awful restaurants and the head of the team was such a suck-up that we had to eat the phony, uninspiring food every break.

I loved your reply, and although it wasn't for me...I'm takin' notes! Thank you for sharing the part about SPEAKING UP! I read just about every single new label I come across in the grocery store, so why should I find out a little more about my meal and how it's prepared. Great point! I try to be mindful of the nutritional information before going out, but it's not always available. I had no idea restaurants would add butter to sandwich buns either! Those sneaky sneaky line cooks! My DH is a chef first and foremost but is a restaurant manager by day, so I'm definitely going to be asking him some insider questions tonight..

Also for the OP, my advice is simple and probably well known by now...Don't assume a salad is a better option than anything else on the menu. I once thought I could order any salad on the menu and still trick myself into the "Yeeeeah, what's up? I ordered a salad. Look at me, being all healthy and stuff" mentality. LOL

Ohhh, and this is big for me so maybe you too....Normally, if I would go to a place like Red Robin or something that had bottomless drinks, Strawberry Lemonade for instance, I would literally drink like 4-5 of them! They're 125 calories each so I just drank away 1/3 of my daily calories. It's always ice water with extra lemon slices for me now, and sometimes I'll add a packet of sugar. I'd rather save the 600 calories and put them toward my meal.

I still love going out, I just stick to restaurants that have a 'healthy' menu.

Almost every place has at least a soup or salad, so it does seem ridiculous to not eat when you go out. If they don't have anything healthy at all on the menu, just get a box and save half of it for another meal. If you're worried about going over on calories, boost your workouts for a couple days and you'll be fine.

Your family will be more supportive if you're not weird about it.

Cooking has always been a joy for me so I don't mind doing it and I used to enjoy taking a break and going out to eat as well. Since I have started being mindful of what I am eating and trying to eat only real food, I've started to not like going out. I really like knowing what's in my food and what I'm putting into my body and when we go out (especially the places my family usually wants to go to) I don't know and that upsets me. Now I've gotten to the point where when anyone even suggests going to eat somewhere I really dread it and usually end up just not eating anything. That of course upsets my husband and makes everyone else (including me) uncomfortable. I really have to find a way past this while still being able to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Any suggestions????

S
What helps me, becuase I go out to eat twice a week.. I try to order from those 560 calorie menus that some places have... if not that, I just try to order the healthiest thing on the menu and only eat half of it, savin the rest for later. Even if its not the healthiest thing, I enjoy it anyway because you know what? We only live once. Btw, I've been doin this for years, and still managed to lose weight and inches. I think what does it is every day that I'm not going out to eat I try my best to eat healthy, and drink 9 cups of water a day to flush any crap out. Works for me.

I have learned how to order in healthy ways. Grilled chicken, shrimp, steak without sauces. Grilled vegs or a salad with lite dressing, veg or tomato based soups. I have been able to find a healthy alternative in every place I've been to, including the local diners. Even if you get a large salad and nurse it through the whole meal, you will be eating and enjoying the company of your family. Try to relax and enjoy your life, one meal will not break you.