scared of losing weight?!
NadineSabbagh
Posts: 142 Member
In the past, whenever I'd embark on yet another weight loss journey, my goal was always to lose a few pounds, never to get to a healthy weight range, just to lose a little bit so that I'd feel a bit better about myself. I'd yoyo back and forth between 196-210 lbs, occasionally dropping into the 180s, but never with much intention to keep going.
Then in my final years at uni I put on around 5 stone, ballooning up to 268lbs (just in time for graduation, yay...) I felt completely lost. I'd always had my 'upper limit' and whenever the scales started to creep towards that number I'd say enough is enough and lose a few lbs. This time, that motivation wasn't there... For the first time I realised I didn't care about myself. I was in a bad place mentally and I was diagnosed with depression and agoraphobia. I knew my weight was a huge issue, but I was almost beyond feeling, I guess? I sort of forgot how to care about anything. Life was just an endless routine of sleeping, hiding away, trying to plod on through my degree and drinking. I really hated the person I'd let myself become.
When I left uni I continued down the same route for a while... For about a year. I 'dealt' with the problem by locking myself in my room and practically drinking myself into oblivion. Surprisingly, it was a drunken comment I made that changed everything for me. My friends were talking about their fitness regimes/weightloss and I drunkenly said that I'd like to start personal training. My sober self probably had no intention of following through with it, but my sister arranged it all and I couldn't back out!
To cut a long, boring story short, I've now completely changed my outlook on everything. I exercise, eat well, am losing weight and getting fitter every day. I no longer suffer from depression or hide away from the world.. I've finally realised I can do this. And I don't mean just lose a few pounds to get to a less conspicuous weight... I mean, I've realised I can go all the way! I can get to a healthy bmi instead of being content with 'overweight', I can keep increasing my fitness level and even exercise for fun, I can tone myself up and have a body that I've worked for and am proud of. The thing is... The idea of this really scares me. Every time I think of the end result I am terrified and I don't know why? Does anyone else ever feel like this? I've always been overweight, so perhaps I'm just scared of venturing into the unknown? I just can't explain it. Why do I have this irrational fear of being slim?!
Then in my final years at uni I put on around 5 stone, ballooning up to 268lbs (just in time for graduation, yay...) I felt completely lost. I'd always had my 'upper limit' and whenever the scales started to creep towards that number I'd say enough is enough and lose a few lbs. This time, that motivation wasn't there... For the first time I realised I didn't care about myself. I was in a bad place mentally and I was diagnosed with depression and agoraphobia. I knew my weight was a huge issue, but I was almost beyond feeling, I guess? I sort of forgot how to care about anything. Life was just an endless routine of sleeping, hiding away, trying to plod on through my degree and drinking. I really hated the person I'd let myself become.
When I left uni I continued down the same route for a while... For about a year. I 'dealt' with the problem by locking myself in my room and practically drinking myself into oblivion. Surprisingly, it was a drunken comment I made that changed everything for me. My friends were talking about their fitness regimes/weightloss and I drunkenly said that I'd like to start personal training. My sober self probably had no intention of following through with it, but my sister arranged it all and I couldn't back out!
To cut a long, boring story short, I've now completely changed my outlook on everything. I exercise, eat well, am losing weight and getting fitter every day. I no longer suffer from depression or hide away from the world.. I've finally realised I can do this. And I don't mean just lose a few pounds to get to a less conspicuous weight... I mean, I've realised I can go all the way! I can get to a healthy bmi instead of being content with 'overweight', I can keep increasing my fitness level and even exercise for fun, I can tone myself up and have a body that I've worked for and am proud of. The thing is... The idea of this really scares me. Every time I think of the end result I am terrified and I don't know why? Does anyone else ever feel like this? I've always been overweight, so perhaps I'm just scared of venturing into the unknown? I just can't explain it. Why do I have this irrational fear of being slim?!
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Replies
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I don't know if it's terrified, but when I get to below 200,. I just give up. I don't know why exactly. I think part of me is afraid of how people will treat me. I dont know how to explain it. I just do the same thing though. Yo yo between 195-203 and then gain it. This time I have been successful in making sure I didn't gain it all back. I stopped when I realized what I was doing. This time around I am going to blow right past 195, and eventually get to my goal weight.0
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I feel the same way! I've been heavy all my life and my husband and I started Insanity a month ago and I keep telling him I am scared ****less to lose weight! Being heavy is what I'm accustomed to! I've never been anything else. So this is a scary feeling for me, but yet I'm excited to see the outcome! Keep up the great work!0
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In the past, whenever I'd embark on yet another weight loss journey, my goal was always to lose a few pounds, never to get to a healthy weight range, just to lose a little bit so that I'd feel a bit better about myself. I'd yoyo back and forth between 196-210 lbs, occasionally dropping into the 180s, but never with much intention to keep going.
Then in my final years at uni I put on around 5 stone, ballooning up to 268lbs (just in time for graduation, yay...) I felt completely lost. I'd always had my 'upper limit' and whenever the scales started to creep towards that number I'd say enough is enough and lose a few lbs. This time, that motivation wasn't there... For the first time I realised I didn't care about myself. I was in a bad place mentally and I was diagnosed with depression and agoraphobia. I knew my weight was a huge issue, but I was almost beyond feeling, I guess? I sort of forgot how to care about anything. Life was just an endless routine of sleeping, hiding away, trying to plod on through my degree and drinking. I really hated the person I'd let myself become.
When I left uni I continued down the same route for a while... For about a year. I 'dealt' with the problem by locking myself in my room and practically drinking myself into oblivion. Surprisingly, it was a drunken comment I made that changed everything for me. My friends were talking about their fitness regimes/weightloss and I drunkenly said that I'd like to start personal training. My sober self probably had no intention of following through with it, but my sister arranged it all and I couldn't back out!
To cut a long, boring story short, I've now completely changed my outlook on everything. I exercise, eat well, am losing weight and getting fitter every day. I no longer suffer from depression or hide away from the world.. I've finally realised I can do this. And I don't mean just lose a few pounds to get to a less conspicuous weight... I mean, I've realised I can go all the way! I can get to a healthy bmi instead of being content with 'overweight', I can keep increasing my fitness level and even exercise for fun, I can tone myself up and have a body that I've worked for and am proud of. The thing is... The idea of this really scares me. Every time I think of the end result I am terrified and I don't know why? Does anyone else ever feel like this? I've always been overweight, so perhaps I'm just scared of venturing into the unknown? I just can't explain it. Why do I have this irrational fear of being slim?!
YES! I am terrified of getting to my goal (Im half way shouldnt I be jazzed?) I think part of the fear is that I wont make it there. Part of the fear is that I will and then what will happen to all of this drive? Im enjoying the Journey so much what will happen when and if I get to my destination?
I guess we have to keep going and find out dont we? We deserve to know what it feel like to reach our goal. Maybe there will be new and different goals. Thanks for the share, Im proud of you!
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Yea my entire life being fat identified me...it was a reason for bad moods....not going out and hating shopping. Today I got on the scale and weighed 135. My dad asked me "Now what are you going to complain about?" The truth is it's scary not having something to blame when life gets crappy...or having to make new, more personal goals when reaching a goal weight. I understand you, but I think u can get past it.0
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Maybe its the fear that "IF" you reach your goal then you won't have anything else to work towards? I put iff in quotation marks because I know you can reach your goals, and I know that once you get nearer to that goal you'll find something else that will take place to keep moving your forward. Fear isn't a bad thing, its the unknown I think. But don't let it stop you!! You are a force to be reckoned with and you can do ANYTHING you put your mind to!0
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I don't know that I'm scared of losing weight, but I do think I've used my fat as a buffer between myself and other people.0
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I felt the same way as my weight started dropping. I've always used my weight as a shield to keep people from noticing me or paying me any attention. I got used to my role as the fat girl in the corner and had a really hard time coming out of it. Sometimes I say that I couldn't have lost the weight without a good therapist. Pushing through and reaching your goal may be enough to let your mind realize it's not as dangerous out here in the world as your subconscious thinks, but just know that you're not alone in this feeling.0
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That is great! I am in that yo yo state myself. Its like everytime I start to lose weight I jsut give up and then when the scale starts to go I try to refocus. But I am still trying. Thank you for sharing your story it give me hope everything will get better if I keep trying.0
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I feel the same way but I'm not exactly sure why. I believe part of it is the fear of regaining the weight once I've lost it. I think another part of it is fear of failure and also fear of never feeling like it is enough, and possibly still feeling uncomfortable in my skin even after the weight is off.0
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I'm with you guys... I don't know how NOT to be "the fat girl".
I even lost 100lbs in the past and didn't even realize how good I looked. I still saw the same fat, ugly girl. (Although now when I look back on pictures of that time, I was gorgeous! LOL)
I keep telling myself this time will be different. This time I will appreciate ME when I am a hottie again.
I think that will be the key to NOT gaining it back again.... or at least I hope so. 0 -
I'm only a few lbs from my goal.. and now I'm ready for a new goal. I am 5'1 and started at 232. I'm at 148 now, with a goal of 145. My life has changed so much over the last year and a half that I'm not ready to just quit because my weight has it that barely healthy spot. I am an athlete now and I want to look like it. My new goal is 127-132 and I know now, that is completely doable. I can remember being excited about getting under 200, then breaking into the 180's. See yourself as lean and fit and you will become lean and fit. the moment you made the decision to change your life you went from fat girl to fit girl.. you just have to walk it out now. Good luck!!!!0
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Change is always scary especially when it's a drastic change to yourself. I feel like it will get less scary over time though. If you are losing weight slowly then the change will occur slowly and will give you time to adjust to your new body along the way. You have no reason to be scared though. You are doing something wonderful for yourself! I think you will become less and less scared as you go.
I've always been a yoyoer with my weight loss efforts going from working out hardcore every single day to severely restricting calories and certain foods and have always gained back the weight plus some. I finally decided that I don't care if I get my ideal body 3 months from now or 3 years from now because I feel good inside when I treat my body right. So instead of saying I'm never eating ice cream and I'm hitting the P90X 6 days a week, I said I was going to eat better and workout every other day. I eat ice cream if I want it. I make a single scoop on a cone and not a huge bowl and I don't feel a single bit remorseful about it. I can stick to working out every other day for the rest of my life. It fits my busy schedule and still allows me plenty of quality time with my family. I just decided that this was something I was going to continue for as long as I am physically capable so I might as well be realistic about it.0 -
I definitely feel the fear. It's the fear of the journey. The fear of "Can I realistically keep dieting/exercising", the fear of failing to keep going. The fear of stopping and going back the what led me here. The fear that, if I do get to my Ultimate goal, what happens then?
I know I have a long way to go until my goal, 70 lbs to ultimate goal, and I'm scared out of my mind I won't be able to get there.0 -
BUMP0
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This was my status update this morning on my wall...
On being the AMAZING you, that you are...Even if you believe different of God or your spiritualism, you still know deep down that there is "something" in you that can lead and inspire others.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
~ Marianne Williamson0 -
I'm only a few lbs from my goal.. and now I'm ready for a new goal. I am 5'1 and started at 232. I'm at 148 now, with a goal of 145. My life has changed so much over the last year and a half that I'm not ready to just quit because my weight has it that barely healthy spot. I am an athlete now and I want to look like it. My new goal is 127-132 and I know now, that is completely doable. I can remember being excited about getting under 200, then breaking into the 180's. See yourself as lean and fit and you will become lean and fit. the moment you made the decision to change your life you went from fat girl to fit girl.. you just have to walk it out now. Good luck!!!!
This is my goal too! To be around 140ish I still have a long way to go though! 0 -
Don't scared of losing weight. You will feel good and positive once you have started loosing. Keep yourself in right frame of mind and everything will fall in its place.0
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I feel the same way!!!0
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i know exactly how you feel..once i start losing weight and people come up to me saying looking good or wow or any positive compliment. i find myself gaining weight right back...i dont think i like the attention i dont know why...i need to find a way to deal with this because i know i can do it ive lost 42lbs before in 16 weeks...i was so proud of myself i was feeling great..but everywhere i turned someone was saying something and before i knew it, i gained it back...so i am focusing again0
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I have trouble sometimes when I try to get my calories really low. I weigh 118-120 pounds at 5 ft 4 and would love to weight about 112, though i have a medium build. In the past i had an eating disorder and weighed about 100 pounds and when I push myself to lose, its like a switch in my brain tells me not to do it.0
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Thank you for all your responses! It's nice to know I'm not the only one who is a little scared of what the future holds!
A lot of you have touched on a few points that really hit a chord with me. Someone mentioned that change is scary - and I think that may be my main problem. I'm definitely a creature of habit, so any form of change is daunting to me! And a huge change like losing 100+ lbs is bound to frighten me a little! (in a good way though, I guess!) I just don't know how to be thin? Haha, I'm so used to being fat... I wonder what thin and healthy feels like?! It's probably one of the biggest changes I can make, so it's scary for someone like me who doesn't adapt well to change!
The other thing is what do I do once I've lost the weight?! That worries me. My whole life has been a weightloss journey... I don't know what it's like to not be trying to lose weight! What do I do when I'm thin?! What will I have that I can obsess about every day?! Haha, I realise that's a bit extreme.. but it's still a worry for me. I don't know how to live a normal, non-overweight life!! :P I know when I've lost the weight I can keep setting myself other goals though - to tone up, fitness goals etc, things I've wanted to do that I couldn't necessarily do when I was overweight..
I don't know what's so different about THIS time, I don't know what it is that is making me think that THIS is the time when I'm going to lose all the weight... all I know is that it's definitely going to happen, regardless of whether the thought frightens me or not!
Good luck to everyone with your own goals! 0 -
I'm scared to lose and scared NOT to lose.. I feel like I'm just stuck in limbo.
Saw a picture of myself today and was so totally disgusted.. feeling a little hopeless.
Help?0 -
I'm scared to lose and scared NOT to lose.. I feel like I'm just stuck in limbo.
Saw a picture of myself today and was so totally disgusted.. feeling a little hopeless.
Help?
You need to use those negative feelings to your advantage! Every time you feel like giving up just remind yourself of how you felt when you saw that picture of yourself. Hopefully that will spur you on to reach your goals! Every time I feel like giving up, or stuffing my face, I sit there for a minute, compose myself, then I whip out my 'before' picture and look at it for a while. It makes me feel upset and ashamed of what I did to myself. It gives me the determination I need to say 'I'm NEVER going to go back to that'. Then I look at pictures of myself when I'm slimmer and I remind myself what I'm working towards. Sometimes it's hard to keep sight of what you're working for, especially when you've a lot of weight to lose. So constant visual reminders can be a great help.
Just think, if you keep going then you will be one day closer to your goal, a new you, someone who is happy with themselves. If you give up then you are only prolonging the time that you are going to feel disgusted with yourself and unhappy.
I wish you all the best, you can do this!! If you need any support feel free to add me as a friend and I will do all I can to motivate 0
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