This post is going to be a downer...

Options
2

Replies

  • Mexicanbigfoot
    Mexicanbigfoot Posts: 520 Member
    Options
    I get very depressed and anxious about the whole thing, too. I'm SO SICK of counting, and planning, and measuring, and worrying about, and focusing, and evaluating, and... It seems most average weight, healthy people I know get hungry, eat. They eat what's around, or casually go over to the sandwhich shop and pick something up. Workout, or don't, not a huge deal, they'll do it the next day if not today. If they want to lose a little, they cut back a bit, and exercise a bit more. Even the ones that are doing something more planned, like weight watchers, eat something, then add up the points later. No biggy.

    Me, I'm constantly watching every morsel, packing food, planning around meals and events, balancing breakfast with an after-dinner snack, and most minutes of most days, just want to EAT without thinking about it. But no, becuase that won't get me to any goals...

    Ugh. The thought of being on top of this to this level, even when I finally get to maintenace, is overwhelming and just plain sad. I've lost this weight before, and I'm doing it again because I didn't stay on top of it. SO with you.

    This is how it feels to me. All the time.
  • rosellasweet
    rosellasweet Posts: 163 Member
    Options
    I hope you find a fun way to do this! I have a sample diet plan I go by and I just mix and match what I'm having for the day. I snack but for some reason between 3 and 5 pm I could eat anything I'm so hungry. Then I go home cook my dinner and I am full until midnight. What kind of madness is that?

    Anyway, find foods and some form of exercise you'll enjoy because if you don't like any of your new habits, you're not going to stick to them. I treat foods like chocolate and sweets as periodic rewards. This was the way I used to view food in high school. My family rarely went out to eat and even eating something like McDonalds was special. We always cooked at home. But when I went to college food was readily available and I could eat as much as I wanted. Now it's just a balance and one I want to maintain. I hope you find your balance!
  • Hearts_2015
    Hearts_2015 Posts: 12,031 Member
    Options
    You could think of it as "being in recovery," in a sense. One day at a time, one choice at a time.

    Or you could think of it as an ongoing game. How will you strategize for the most fun, the most intensity, and the best nutrition, within your calories?

    Or you could think of it as a process of formation. As you adjust your eating and your exercise, it is forming your body and your brain into something different than it was. How can you help that process just a bit each day?
    Really positive post... "one day at a time" really can work for anything.. there's a thread on the mainboards that a number of us use and post each day. http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1012994-just-for-today

    One suggestion I have is to keep looking at the Motivation section for the Before/Afters you'll be blown away... keep in mind these are REAL ppl, some you'll join with and see the progress. Ppl on TV that show before and after, mags, even some sites on the Net are photo shopped but MFP before and afters are hardworking ordinary ppl like you and I that actually DID IT!

    It's hard to continue when you're overwhelmed, frustrated etc., but that's when you have to dig in deep within yourself and move your body anyway, pick the healthy choices anyway... Motivation is found within, others can inspire you, cheer you on but no one can do the work for us!

    Do you plan your meals? Are you eating enough for the amount of movement you get in each day? Do you exercise enough to have a deficit daily? You don't have to awful much to lose according to what I see on your ticker... have you got your "lbs. per week loss" set accordingly so you don't get yourself frustrated along the way?

    I've lost a large amount and have a large amount left to go..but I can't quit now...I need to continue to work on getting my body healthier.

    You can do it!!

    I plan on logging my food every day for the rest of my life. And I plan on brushing my teeth every day for the rest of my life. I don't have to be obsessive, but for me it's like checking your bank account before you buy groceries...

    I think for some of us, that's just what we will have to do.
    Great attitude! Very realistic... we don't stop brushing our teeth or stop exorcising when we reach goal.. we keep up the healthy habits... same as keep track of our food and what we put into our mouths. :drinker:
    Thinking of you and sending you warm hugs, we can ALL do this...
  • c2hrist3a
    c2hrist3a Posts: 67 Member
    Options
    I can't even bring food to work with me, I end up eating it before lunch. Every day I walk over the grocery store to buy my lunch, I always make sure it's healthy. It's the only thing that works. I'm just so annoyed this is the way my head works. I'm so sick of thinking all the time. I live with 3 guys, and it never crosses their minds what they need to eat, they just eat. My husband is ripped, without giving it a second thought and i get so jealous of him sometimes! We have the exact same lifestyle outside of work. The thing is he has an active job, where i sit on my rapidly expanding rear all day.

    I wonder if you don't have some deeper emotional issues going on that you haven't addressed. I think that weight gain can be an indicator of deeper internal issues. Have you considered that your eating may be an external manifestation of an internal condition?

    If it's not-I know that it was for me-I sought counseling for those buried things. It doesn't mean that I won't have to count and watch, but it means that I need to deal with emotional issues head on instead of eating to make myself feel better. You cannot will emotional health. Just an observation from my own experience.

    Good Luck!
  • gailmelanie
    gailmelanie Posts: 210 Member
    Options
    I can relate with the emotional content of your post and I wish I knew a solution. I eat healthy, too, but it's all too easy to eat one or two extra "goodies" making all the rest a failure, and if each day is like that or more than 3 days/week, nothing happens except frustration. And feeling crappy about myself and my ability to control my food intake and the need to constantly do that. I don't lose, but don't really gain, either. One might think a stable weight could be a good thing... unless it's consistently 30 lbs more than one's body needs to be healthty. But... the last time I was really slim (toward the low end of the recommended weight range for my height,) my calorie intake was less than 1200 cal/day, I ran every day, I rode my bike to work every day and I worked as a maid in a casino hotel. That's what it took to be that slim. It will probably never happen again like that and even if I did all that again, the result wouldn't be the same because I'm over 30 years older now. I have even gone to therapy over this issue and gotten nowhere with it. All the suggestions you'll probably hear here are likely good ones, and I've tried most what's being suggested but can't seem to make any permanent changes, either. Sorry I'm a downer too.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    Options
    I think of it this way:

    If I have to log calories on here for the rest of my life, if my eating habits are something that I never get to be careless about

    BUT

    I don't get the heart disease and Diabetes that run in my family, if my children don't have to watch me neglect myself into an early grave (like I'm basically having to do with my mom, who has been Diabetic for 15 years and has never properly taken care of herself, and now is on dialysis)

    THEN

    I will consider it a fair trade.
  • dorothytd
    dorothytd Posts: 1,138 Member
    Options
    After being able to hold on this time to my loss - for over six years - I think another poster already said it best. One day at a time. When you start thinking about "the rest of your life," that's when it gets to you. If I think about having to shower, put on make-up, pay bills, laundry, ANYTHING, for the REST OF MY LIFE, I just want to go back to bed and never get out. Every day will have its challenges. Some have less, some more. Once it becomes a lifestyle, you'll do it. Every day? Nope. Once in a while I don't take a shower. But I sure do take one the next day.

    Focus on the now. And the healthy. Do your best. Will you fail sometimes? Yes. Get up again. It is worth it.

    Good luck!!!
  • melindasuefritz
    melindasuefritz Posts: 3,509 Member
    Options
    thats why its a life style of eating healthy
  • katygirl66
    katygirl66 Posts: 19 Member
    Options
    Your husband is ripped, and muscle requires more calories to maintain, so of course he can eat what ever he wants. Besides, men don't have the genes that prepare their bodies for childbirth, so they lose weight faster.
  • fruitlooper
    fruitlooper Posts: 30 Member
    Options
    I am seeing a therapist- I know for sure I have some emotional issues. My youngest brother passed away earlier this year and it's been really hard for me. I think i gained 10 pounds within a few months. Prior to that I had issues too, they just weren't as easy to pinpoint.
  • ChristinaOrtiz23
    ChristinaOrtiz23 Posts: 1,546 Member
    Options
    WOW I THOUGHT THIS WAS ONLY ME!! YOU SAID THIS WILL BE A DOWNER, BUT YOU MADE ME BELIVE ITS NOT JUST ME OUT HERE, THAST IM BY MYSELF THINKING AND DING THE SAME STUFF!!! THI SPOST OPENED UP MY EYES AN DI APPRECIATE THAT!!!
  • alisonlynn1976
    alisonlynn1976 Posts: 929 Member
    Options
    That's why I'm not counting my calories. I might do it temporarily if I find myself stuck in a plateau, but I'm doing well without it so far and I'm not willing to commit to a lifetime of counting calories. I feel like that would be too obsessive, as well as too tedious, for me. I realize some people are fine with counting calories forever, and to each their own, but it's not for me.
  • fruitlooper
    fruitlooper Posts: 30 Member
    Options
    One day at a time is a good idea, and I like the trade off idea...

    I guess I have to stop pouting like a baby and thinking it's not fair. It is what it is. I have all of my limbs, I don't have cancer, now that's not fair. It's something I really can control. Haha I feel like such a whiner that i even posted this.
  • KimCanKimWill
    Options
    I completely agree. I got the way I am currently by allowing myself to have whatever I wanted. Now, after a "paradigm shift" I will become who I want to be by allowing my body to have the best things for it. I've got big goals and dreams for when I shed this extra person...a 5K...a cruise...playing softball again...all things I look forward to, and will only be realized if I continue to see food for what it truly is...FUEL.
  • Briko3
    Briko3 Posts: 266 Member
    Options
    Thanks- the part that depresses me is these new habits seem so good when I'm motivated, it seems impossible to go back to my old self. But somehow, it just happens. :/ I've stuck with this for almost a year, twice, and that still wasn't enough to entrench it into myself. When I'm doing it, I can't imagine going back to being lazy, but it happens without me even being conscious of it.

    It really is a lifestyle change...and not just what you eat. A lot of us eat during times of boredom, stress, emotional times, as a form of entertainment, etc. Changing your lifestyle might meant that instead of family celebrations always being food related at a restaurant, they can be activity related like a picnic, rafting, going to a park, etc. They can also mean that you get a hobby to keep you busy so you're not bored and constantly eating.
  • Fonarios
    Fonarios Posts: 31 Member
    Options
    i hear exactly what youre saying. ill go for a month or two doing everything perfect and lose 15 lbs...then on a weekend ill have gained 8-9 lbs and it takes me two weeks to lose it again..WTF?? thats when i lose motivation.
  • schaskes
    schaskes Posts: 103 Member
    Options
    There is a lot of wisdom in these replies - just want to add one more way to think about it. People who have WAY more money than they need don't need to think about how much money they spend on a daily basis. But the rest of us need to balance checkbooks or use Quicken or similar money-tracking programs to make sure that we live within our financial means. Logging calories and/or thinking about what I eat every day is how I make sure that I stay healthy. It doesn't feel like a chore (I'm coming up on my one-year anniversary), but it has gotten easier to estimate and figure out meals that I don't cook myself. I don't compare myself to others who don't log/track, but frankly most of them eat less healthily than I do and are less fit!
  • poedunk65
    poedunk65 Posts: 1,336 Member
    Options
    It's like driving a car, the minute you aren;t paying attention you crash!
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,326 Member
    Options
    All of you have commented have the wrong mind set.

    Make this fun and a lifestyle.
    You say planning and prepping meals is a hassle? Make it fun, try new stuff. If you don't like cooking than just buy microwave veggie packs.

    all? i'm not the one who has to talk myself into doing stuff because it's fun.

    maybe you're the one with he wrong mindset if you have to trick yourself into doing it?
  • rachseby
    rachseby Posts: 285 Member
    Options
    I hear you! My husband eats whatever he wants and doesn't gain a pound. I feel like I gain weight just looking at food. But I know that getting so tired of always watching what I ate got me to where I am, so I have vowed to just be more matter of fact about it from now on. If I ever lose this weight, I'm going to do whatever it takes not to put it back on...even if that means weighing myself constantly and counting every calorie...I just think about my size 6 versus my size 16 jeans, and that motivates me enough to make it seem worth it...