Looking for friends with open diaries!

andreaaaaah
andreaaaaah Posts: 19 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hi! I started my journey in 2009. I was 230lbs and was diagnosed with IIH. That's a story for another day, but what my doctor told me was the only thing you can do for yourself is to lose weight.

It wasn't easy and at first (and for the whole journey) I struggled. But I lost 50lbs in the first three months by dramatically reducing my intake and exercising 20 minutes a day roughly times a week.

It took a long time but 2 years and 80lbs later my doctor told me I was cured.

Last year in january my very first boyfriend, who had been with me for most of my illness, cheated on me and dumped me. I stopped eating, started working out hard and lost 11lbs in two weeks. Shortly after I met the man of my dreams, who showed me that no matter what size I am, I am perfect for me.

I stopped being so hard on myself and started to enjoy life again. It wasn't all about losing weight and being perfect anymore (things that my ex had pushed me to do) We started to go out to eat and I virtually stopped working out.
In august last year my grandmother who I was extremely close with passed away suddenly and I was thrust into depression. Life didn't seem worth living, no matter how happy I was with everything else going on. I've gotten through that pain, with the help of my amazing and supportive boyfriend. I'm determined to treat myself and my body better.

A year and a half ago I was my lowest adult weight of 150 now I'm tipping the scales at 185. Every day is a struggle. I have a serious problem with binge eating, eating past the point of being full and spending countless dollars on junk food.

I'm looking for friends who might struggle with the same things, people who can be a circle of support for each other.

My goal is to become a personal trainer. Helping my best friend lose 80lbs with me inspired me and has created a drive in me. the only thing holding me back is myself.

I'm sorry this was a huge post but I'm looking for a change and I feel ready for it
This is my original before and after.
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This is me at my smallest
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This is me now and my wonderful boyfriend
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Replies

  • mothsfkinprincess
    mothsfkinprincess Posts: 11
    I have the same problem with binge eating. I'm trying to stay on track and there's sooo many Chips and Tasykake's in this house I can down them all in on day! I'm not going to but it's hard to stay away.
  • doggiesnot
    doggiesnot Posts: 334 Member
    First, congratulations on your successes and finding love again. I hope this is a great guy for you.

    Second, you can do this! You are really not that far from your goal. It may be hard to see it, but if you can visualize yourself at your goal weight, it's easier to get there. It will happen!

    > I have a serious problem with binge eating, eating past the point of being full and spending countless dollars on junk food.

    This is because you're not fully focused. If you were really mad at being overweight, truly pissed, then you would never even stop to buy junk food! Find your reason "why" you want to lose weight, and it will help carry you through the rough patches.

    Try logging your food and tracking your calories, it will really help. Of course, a regular workout regimen is also recommended.

    Good luck on your journey!
  • LucarinoN
    LucarinoN Posts: 4 Member
    HI :)

    I will open up my journal for you and would love to become my fitness pal friends as well.. Your story is so similar to mine :)

    I have struggled with weight my whole life in high school I dealt with the biggest jerks who could only make fun of me and bring me down.. I really dwelled on this part of my life for a long time feeling very depressed. I lost about 100lbs at the end of high school putting my weight down to 153lbs, BUT then just the same as you my grandma who I was close with passed away and I turned to drugs. :( I spent about 5 months out of my life addicted to the worst drugs and finally snapped out of it and took my families support and help.. My now husband stayed with my through getting skinny doing the drugs and then we became food junkies I would try to keep up with how much he ate and just kept gainign and gaining.. We just got married last October and since then I have slid into this comfortable position with him and have topped the scales at a 275.8 lbs... This scares me soo much I dont want to bethis big and I really want to lose but would love the online support and friend that knows what I am going thru.. Here's to us and get back to where we need to be :)
  • LadyElby
    LadyElby Posts: 151 Member
    You have a very inspiring story. And believe it or not, the struggles you have gone through, and continue to go through, are not so different from those of so many others here on MFP, and all over! I'm sorry you've struggled so much, but please know that you are not alone. We are all here for the same purpose; to lose weight, and to find the healthy, happy person we're all hiding behind extra weight. I have not struggled in life so much as you have, but I have certainly had my ups and downs, as well as complete roadblocks, including an unsupportive, and unhelpful ex boyfriend.

    I've also helped a number of friends battle depression, anxiety, bipolar, etc. due to death of loved ones, ugly divorces of parents, abuse and a "simple" chemical imbalance. Please feel free to add me and message me if you even just need someone to talk to, or for support.

    I'm so glad to hear that you have found a great support and friend in your boyfriend. It is so important to have a healthy relationship with the people you surround yourself with, specifically your significant other.

    Never give up on yourself, or your dreams. You can, and you will meet your goals.
  • Beachtreasures
    Beachtreasures Posts: 143 Member
    I am returning after a couple of months off, which was a mistake. I had to gain some weight back and kick myself in the butt before I could get my head back on track. I have had great success with MFP and enjoy the interaction and mutual support. Also a binge eater who can control it and then slide off track, only to pick myself up again. Feel free to send me a friend request.
  • Mari_2009
    Mari_2009 Posts: 41 Member
    Hi!!! I have been big my whole love. I was recently my largest (287) and decided I couldn't do it anymore. I tried many times to lose weight when I got around 250 lbs. I would always start and stop. I got to a point where I excessively ate. I ate when I had problems. When something went wrong food was my friend. Now, I'm trying to change that. :)
  • maybeazure
    maybeazure Posts: 301 Member
    My diary is open to friends. I eat whatever I feel like...refined sugar, flour, meat, etc. But I've found that I can eat a lot more if I chose things like fruit at least sometimes. I generally eat about 1200 calories a day. I'm happy if people want to add me, and a look at my diary, but I'm pretty happy with the way that I'm eating right now, and so I might not want a whole lot of unsolicited advice about things that I don't really understand like "clean foods." I give encouragement, but not advice (unless it is asked for).
  • Naturesdawn
    Naturesdawn Posts: 14 Member
    Hi,

    I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your grandmother-- grandparents are so special. Health issues are very scary, and I'm so glad you got through yours. You've overcome a lot!

    Binge eating is my biggest downfall! I'd be happy to support you - and have your support back. I've been through a major illness as well--which is what started my journey towards better health. How I ate/exercised for most of 2012 seemed to curb the desire to binge and made me feel healthier. 2013 has not started very well! I just recently came back to MFP and started logging again, after being tempted back to binge eating my comfort foods for the past 5 months-- and gaining back 10 lbs as a result. I'm ready to get back to health too! I think my diary is open to friends-- I'll send you a request!

    ~ Dawn
  • bpeaceful
    bpeaceful Posts: 8
    I would be happy to share mine and see others if anyone wants to be friends. I just think we're all here to help each other and share ideas right? I will give support as much as I can.
  • nestingdoll
    nestingdoll Posts: 21
    My food diary is public as well, feel free to comment :)
  • susanhiding
    susanhiding Posts: 88 Member
    You did it once before, you can do it again! I am also a binge eater and it is definitely tough! I have found that mfp is definitely helping me realize what I'm eating. My food diary is public to friends, I'm not too obsessed over it. I'm just trying to exercise more and eat less! You are more than welcome to add me!

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