Reverse body dysmorphia!

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Mirrorvsscale
Mirrorvsscale Posts: 3 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hi, I'm new to MFP! I was an active thin child and teen who never ever even thought about food or exercise. Then college came and I gained a lot of weight from inactivity and poor food choices, both of which became habits! I have great self esteem though, so as the pounds came on, I never really cared or noticed. I had four children with my husband and high school sweetheart in about 4.5 years, so that only compounded my weight issues! Still not really concerned though as I continued with my bad eating and low activity. So here I am at my absolute heaviest, 190lbs...I am 5'2" and I finally noticed that I don't recognize myself in pictures! When I met my husband I was 107lbs, same height. So I know that those days are gone after having children but my goal is 125 , so I have a super long road! I am eating 1200 calories a day and walking (building toward a run) daily. I am also adding in yoga a couple times a week. Not looking for a quick fix, just trying to change habits and slowly move back down the scale! I still feel attractive and happy, and my mirror and eyes have been lying to me about my health, not my looks! Lol! The scale has convinced me that even high self esteem can be an enemy sometimes!

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  • atlchc8
    atlchc8 Posts: 53 Member
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    I am 5'3 and got up to 193 lbs at my highest weight. I always had a high self esteem about my looks until I started to see myself in pictures as a really big girl and I couldn't fit any of my clothes! I am now working on raising my self esteem because it seems now I feel worse about my body than I ever have before even though I have lost about 20 lbs, It is true that when you have self esteem you cannot see what others see only what you see!
  • jbuck93
    jbuck93 Posts: 89 Member
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    I know what you mean! I have one of those bodies that adds fat evenly all over and still maintains my curvy shape. Then I hit 200lbs... and decided I had to do something.
  • Runhard13
    Runhard13 Posts: 138 Member
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    Just keep up with the healthy habits and lifestyle coupled with activity and youll start sheding the pounds away. What you eat is a product of that...if fruits vegetables and fat free items tasted amazing then everyone would be skinny..all starts with the habits and lifestyle change :)
  • Mirrorvsscale
    Mirrorvsscale Posts: 3 Member
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    I hope you can gain that confidence back! Good for you for losing 20 pounds and thanks for letting me join you and vice versa on our weight loss journey! It's slow and steady progress that I'm looking for!
  • Mirrorvsscale
    Mirrorvsscale Posts: 3 Member
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    Curves and confidence are great! Unhealthy habits are killer! And not in a good way! Thanks for understanding guys!
  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
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    Yep, me too! I call it Unorexia lol. You could "lose a few pounds" but you're cool like this also. And when you realize that a few is more like 75 you wonder how the hell that happened?! Unorexia. It's not pretty.
  • arains89
    arains89 Posts: 442 Member
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    I have always been the same way. Until lately now that I have started to try and get healthy my self esteem has plummeted and I feel like after losing 19 pounds I feel worse about myself now than I ever did. Hoping that my sassy self comes back soon. "losing weight" is depressing. Especially when you don't move in months.
  • BobcatGirl110
    BobcatGirl110 Posts: 364 Member
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    I am just under 5'3" and started my journey at 204. I , like you, never saw myself as anything different than I was 7 years ago. I was the same person, the same mind, the same wife, the same mother, etc etc. The weight honestly didn't bother me, I didn't notice it, and more than once said "hey...if you loved me at 130 then what's the difference at 200?" I have referred to this as BDD more than once so it's refreshing to see someone else use the same terminology.....sure rings bells in your head when you see others saying the things you KNOW you feel too :) Only piece of advice is the 1200 calories....gotta be careful with that. Do not use MFP for calories goals. Go out and use scooby workout or something to truely see how many calories you should eat. You have to make sure you are eating enough to fuel your body. I would hate to see you eating 1200 and not losing weight all because of that silly calculator. This site is awesome in every way...except that one :)
  • mellyish
    mellyish Posts: 253 Member
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    Go out and use scooby workout or something to truely see how many calories you should eat. You have to make sure you are eating enough to fuel your body. I would hate to see you eating 1200 and not losing weight all because of that silly calculator. This site is awesome in every way...except that one :)

    I'll help you get there! I'm 5'2" as well and was 183lbs at my highest, although I had like zero confidence so kudos on that! :happy:

    scoobysworkshop.com/accurate-calorie-calculator

    I'll also add that I am currently 148.2 and netting around 1436 daily and still slowly losing. They give 1200 to men too, I wouldn't trust it :tongue:
  • Missjulesdid
    Missjulesdid Posts: 1,444 Member
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    I find that when I'm going up in weight I think I look thinner than what I am.. and when I'm going down, I think I look fatter than what I am, I think you just get used to seeing yourself looking a certain way and it takes longer for your mind to adjust than it does for your body. Personally the kick in the pants I needed to get serious about this journey was for health reasons. I was never really uncomfortable with my weight.. I was 360 and I'd hear people saying how horrible and ashamed they felt at 160 and I just didn't relate. I always saw being fat as an inconvenience but not a source of shame. When the inconvenience became too great, I decided to remove it from the equation and lose the weight once and for all. ALSO, when I was at my heaviest, I did have some denial going on.. I kind of had it in my head that I needed to lose "about a hundred pounds" .... uh, yeah.. try 215 pounds.. HOW could I have thought that I was only "about a hundred pounds" overweight? Denial baby.
  • Four_Leaf_Clover
    Four_Leaf_Clover Posts: 332 Member
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    I just hadn't stopped to think what I look like (after also having 4 kids in 5 years) - my husband has always loved me - then all the sudden I just realized I was huge (5'3" and as high as 217 post kids).

    I have lost more than 20lbs since my heaviest but I am really struggling to keep consistently losing.

    We have to keep our self-esteem high ladies - we are a lot more than just our shapes!
  • MandaJean83
    MandaJean83 Posts: 677 Member
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    Holy cow, your story is my story (minus the kids). Super thin child, ate ANYTHING (and EVERYTHING) I wanted...didn't exercise...and always was underweight. Then came college, and then marriage, and I ballooned up about 40 lbs. I never thought too much of it until one day I looked in the mirror and thought "WTF?!" LOL. I lost 25 lbs originally, but am back up 10 of them. Just want to maintain at 120-125 right now. I'm 5'3" btw, and a very small frame. I'm gonna add you!
  • climbamnt
    climbamnt Posts: 190 Member
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    Only piece of advice is the 1200 calories....gotta be careful with that. Do not use MFP for calories goals. Go out and use scooby workout or something to truely see how many calories you should eat. You have to make sure you are eating enough to fuel your body. I would hate to see you eating 1200 and not losing weight all because of that silly calculator. This site is awesome in every way...except that one :)

    This! I started out at 190 and have been losing at 1800 calories (5'3" BTW), you don't need to under-eat either! I went through the same thing! Was always active until college etc and I knew I gained weight, but never thought it was that much until I was avoiding pictures! Good luck!

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