i desperately need all the help i can get to lose 95lbs

Hello Lah and welcome!

Firstly as someone who has to lose about the same amount as you - I know how you feel. 95lbs seems a huge mountain to climb.

But no-one has to climb Everest in a day. So start with a small goal. Maybe to lose 5lbs or to change one thing in your diet to a better option.

This journey has to be for life - its not a sprint - in fact you are better off taking it slowly and one step at a time.

Good luck and feel free to add for mutual support. :flowerforyou:

You can do this, sometimes it's one hour at a time, one meal at a time, one day at a time. Yesterday is over, start again today. I won't tell you it's easy but I will tell you it's worth it!

We all have one of "those" days...one off day won't undo the several good day's you've had - keep your chin up and keep tryin'!! Maybe setting smaller goals would help - don't look at the whole 95lbs - you know, set a 15lb goal...when you reach that, set the next one for 25lbs.

Hi Lah

Nice to meet you :-)
I too have joined MFP this June and have lots to loose... (70lbs)
I have fought this weight loss battle for so so SO long that at times I really feel like its a battle that I am never going to win so I wanted to encourage you and say "WE CAN DO IT!"
Having a bad day can really depress us and make us feel worthless but I say its ok.... "So what if you have had a bad day, today is a new day and you can do it"
I have given myself small goals as I know 70lbs just feels unachieveable... so for now my goal is to go down one dress size and 14lbs :-)
I also measure myself so knowing that I am loosing inches/centimeters makes a difference.
You are not alone...

Ciao for now

Hi there Lah,

Glad you joined, and I can understand the struggles your having. I have a lot of weight to lose. Because of that, I set mini goals for myself cause in the beginning if I thought OMG you have to lose 140 lbs I would have given up. But, if I think of 10 pound increments it's not such a scary thing.

Also, I try to focus more on health, nutrition and fitness goals more. I set monthly goals of where I want to push myself fitness wise. Each time pushing a little further. When I focus on my health, nutrition and fitness the weight takes care of itself. Those things mean a lot more to me then a number on the scale. I can breath more, I can walk further, I can lift heavier, etc.

You can do this, just focus on making small changes and small goals at a time.

Have a wonderful day

Jen

welcome lah! congrats on posting here as that is the biggest and hardest step! day 1 is always the most difficult, but you WILL reach your goals through consistency and logging every little morsel you eat! everything! even if you ate the whole house. and i promise over time, it gets easier as the weight falls off. you should be HAPPY you are sick of being overweight and unhealthy, because that is the motivation you need to succeed!

i thought the same as you...looked at the whole number i had to lose and cried because it overwhelmed me so much. but i knew i had to start then before things got worse, and the number got bigger! i took baby steps. broke the final goal into bits, and my first major goal was to hit 10% of my body weight (http://bit.ly/11Aodvs). it wasnt important to me how long this was going to take, but that i was actually going to do it, period.

first few weeks, i logged EVERYTHING i ate. and i mean everything. it gave me a better understanding why i got so fat. i forgot what normal portion sizes were, as i was eating easily for 2...even 3 or 4! so i also joined weight watchers online, while logging again to MFP. while on ww, i relearned how much to eat, what a normal portion size was etc. its helped me TREMENDOUSLY, and now i understand how to eat.

i bought a digital weight scale to reinforce how much of a food i was eating, so i could be accurate in my logging. next i bought bodymedia link to see how many calories i was expending each day. no more guessing and assuming since this measured my bodys calories. i gave myself a goal to hit 10K steps a day, but that was impossible for me when i first started, considering all the weight i was carrying..it just wasnt easy to get around. so i broke it down to 5K and tried hard to reach that step goal no matter what it took. i walked instead of getting into a cab, and over time, it got easier to walk and i can proudly say i can hit 10K now without pain. it gets easier!

so i started in mid feb, and i have already lost 33 lbs. i can tell you i havent really tried that hard to lose weight this month, so its been slow, but im OK with that. i know that i will reach my goal, and i know that you will too. it just takes effort (you have to WANT THIS!), consistency and a bit of exercise (walking is mine). also tons of water too! if you start feeling ill eating healthy at first, remember you are detoxing your body, and the toxins of all that bad food is leaving your body.

you'll have your days here and there, but it doesnt matter. this is really a lifestyle change not a diet, and habits are hard to break, but they will break if you keep at it. these boards have saved my life really...the support is no other, so keep logging daily and never give up.

and remember, you CAN have your favorite foods and lose weight. ive lost this weight on eating healthier versions (and portions!) of pizza, mac&cheese, alfredo, ice cream, you name it. anything can work if you fit it into your calorie goals. incorporate LOTS of protein in your breakfast and lunch, and you will not feel the urge to binge...at least i didnt.

if i can do it, you surely can.

You can do it Lah! Take one day at a time...if yesterday wasn't great, try today. Feel free to add me as a friend.

Nice to meet you, I have to do the same. I found this has been the easiest thing to work with so far. Just don't forget to write things down. I found I forget a lot of things during the day

Years ago, my Dad wanted to lose ten pounds. He became so committed that he lost 80! I have carried an extra 35-40 ounds for 25 years. I decided 16 months ago that I had done it long enough. I started counting calories on this website, and attending "boot camp" at my office. It took 16 months, but I have finally, gladly, lost 30 of those pounds. You can do it, too. People here can be very supportive, and helpful. One day does not decide your success or failure. It is a journey. You can do it. Good luck.

You can do this, sometimes it's one hour at a time, one meal at a time, one day at a time. Yesterday is over, start again today. I won't tell you it's easy but I will tell you it's worth it!

This.

I hate to say this, but you don't actually need our help. There's really nothing we can do except walk this path beside you.

What you do need is to believe in yourself, and to educate yourself about nutrition and exercise. YOU WILL PROBABLY FAIL sometimes. Most, if not all, of us have done so. The key is to get right back in the game and not let past defeats dictate your future.

I just had this conversation with my personal trainer yesterday. It's frustrating and I cave in to food. He told me, don't look at it from the perspective of losing 50lbs. In his words, "that would overwhelm anyone." Look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself, out loud "I'm going to lose 7lbs this month." It's not as high-pressure that way. If you come close, you still lost and if you're over, great!! He also told me not to get on the scale all the time. Once a month max, or when you notice clothes fitting differently.

Good luck! Feel free to add me as a friend if you'd like. We all need supportive friends :happy:

You can do this. When I started I had 122.5 lbs to lose. I have lost 80 now (after gaining at Christmas and last week while on vacation). I know it seems like a lot but if you break it down into manageable goals and forget the big number it is not as scary. Do it 10 lbs at a time. Focus on those 10 lbs. Doesn't seem that daunting anymore does it?
Set some small non food related rewards for yourself so you have something else to look forward to.
And remember to live a little. Dont get totally obsessed that you forget to enjoy time with your daughter and family and friends.

Good luck! Add me as a friend on here if you wish!

I will give you as much support as you need, but you need to believe in yourself also. Set your goals at different levels. Work on the first 10 and celebrate it! If I think I am going to go over on calories then I do a few aerobics to burn them. On the other hand that was yesterday and today you can start fresh. We all have a bad day once in a while. You can do this and you will feel soooo good about it! Feel free to add me as a friend and look at my diary.

Hi Lah! I am in the same exact boat. I need to lose apx 130# and at times I feel like I will never do it but then I see the wonderful pics and success stories of those who have and then I think to myself NO! stop thinking like that You CAN do this. If they can I can. And we all have small setbacks. Last weekend I went to the drive in... I had a chocolate chip cookie bar, a small slice of pizza and a foot long hot dog! Oy but I didn't beat myself up over it and the next I just got back on track. Feel free to add me as I would love to help support you along your way and vice versa!

Lots of great advise.
You will get what you put in, commit to yourself and stay with it -- you can do it (through the learning given to you by bad days).
Try not to get discouraged by a bad day, just dont use as an excuse to give up, pick yourself up and start again--your worth it.
As has been said, concentrate more on what you eat and what your fitness goals are and the weight will take care of itself. a week with a gain but with health improvement is still better than doing nothing or giving up.
I have become more lax these days but during the biggest part of my journey, I weighed and measured everything and I mean everything---I logged everything I put in my mouth ..... If I couldnt log it I didnt eat/drink it and that held me accountable to myself and it worked, so far I have lost 123 pounds and on my way to goal.
You can do this girl.
Any other variable is up to you, day you weigh in, etc just eat healthy, move more than you think you can and LOG, LOG, LOG.
The thoughts about setting smaller goals on the way to your big goal--thats super advise and yes if you dont believe in yourself, any other advise is wasted energy.
Good luck to you.