Legit reaons your S/O is an unsupportive douche

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13

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  • homerjspartan
    homerjspartan Posts: 1,893 Member
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    His favorite words:

    Pizza
    IPA (technically my 3 favorite letters)
    Ice cream
    Beer

    Jerkwad is always pouring me an IPA with a perfect head on it. At the perfect temperature. And he expects me to NOT drink it??

    :angry:

    *gets up to pour beer*



    You said "perfect head"......

    *snort*

    I woman that reads that post and pulls "perfect head" out as the only thing she saw..... I am totally offended.

    Please marry me.

    :flowerforyou:
  • FindingMyself24
    FindingMyself24 Posts: 613 Member
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    OR when he goes and gets taco bell while your sitting in the car next to him and constantly comments on how good the food is while you sit there and smell it lol yep..he does stuff like this all the time haha
  • MzManiak
    MzManiak Posts: 1,361 Member
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    His favorite words:

    Pizza
    IPA (technically my 3 favorite letters)
    Ice cream
    Beer

    Jerkwad is always pouring me an IPA with a perfect head on it. At the perfect temperature. And he expects me to NOT drink it??

    :angry:

    *gets up to pour beer*



    You said "perfect head"......

    *snort*

    hahahahaha that's all I noticed from that post too... What a perv. :laugh:
  • HopefulLeigh
    HopefulLeigh Posts: 363 Member
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    I bet he doesn't even withhold sex until you've lost a prerequisite amount of weight right? Wanker.

    WHAT!?! Do men do that??

    Oh yeah, men withhold sex all the time. We use it as a tool to get what we want from you sex crazed women.

    On a side note, I have these magic beans......

    Hubs has magic beans too. That's why withholding sex is so effective.
  • lachesissss
    lachesissss Posts: 1,298 Member
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    He can't help it if his hash brownies are award winning!
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
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    Wait, legit reasons? So these are reasons you are fine with and that he's legitimately in the right to do this? Your title confuses me. If it's legit, then why is he a douche?

    :indifferent:
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
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    I bet he doesn't even withhold sex until you've lost a prerequisite amount of weight right? Wanker.

    WHAT!?! Do men do that??

    Oh yeah, men withhold sex all the time. We use it as a tool to get what we want from you sex crazed women.

    On a side note, I have these magic beans......

    My husband tried that once. We sat around glaring at each other for about 30 minutes, while I went "What do you mean no?". Weirdest 30 minutes of my life.
  • JustAboutDelicious_wechanged
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    I bet he doesn't even withhold sex until you've lost a prerequisite amount of weight right? Wanker.
    OMG, I can do this? I should have thought of this long ago. :laugh: Nah, I like the sexy time too much
  • wbandel
    wbandel Posts: 530 Member
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    When I'm doing home exercise videos my husband will walk into the room and cheer me on. Usually it's when I'm in an awkward position and he yells "get it! get it! get them ****ers", which totally throws me off because I'm laughing too hard to continue. :grumble:

    He'll also wait until I only have like 200-300 calories left for the day and then decide he wants pizza for supper. :sad: So now I just hide leftover pizza in the fridge in the vegetable drawer, so he doesn't eat it all before I can have some for breakfast. I also hide soda cans in there too or else he'd devour them all.

    He also likes to surprise me with those giant king snickers bars. :noway: So I hide those in the freezer (if I wait to long to eat it, he'll rescind the offer and gobble it all up). lol
  • LoreleiEvil
    LoreleiEvil Posts: 65 Member
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    I bet he doesn't even withhold sex until you've lost a prerequisite amount of weight right? Wanker.

    WHAT!?! Do men do that??

    Oh yeah, men withhold sex all the time. We use it as a tool to get what we want from you sex crazed women.

    On a side note, I have these magic beans......

    Hubs has magic beans too. That's why withholding sex is so effective.

    If you hit him right in the Magic Beans, he'll be withholding better than a tax accountant for a LONG time.
  • missdibs1
    missdibs1 Posts: 1,092 Member
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    When I'm doing home exercise videos my husband will walk into the room and cheer me on. Usually it's when I'm in an awkward position and he yells "get it! get it! get them ****ers", which totally throws me off because I'm laughing too hard to continue. :grumble:

    He'll also wait until I only have like 200-300 calories left for the day and then decide he wants pizza for supper. :sad: So now I just hide leftover pizza in the fridge in the vegetable drawer, so he doesn't eat it all before I can have some for breakfast. I also hide soda cans in there too or else he'd devour them all.

    He also likes to surprise me with those giant king snickers bars. :noway: So I hide those in the freezer (if I wait to long to eat it, he'll rescind the offer and gobble it all up). lol

    I used to hide chocolate in with the veggies and water bottles. I tried the freezer too! He always finds them.
  • RllyGudTweetr
    RllyGudTweetr Posts: 2,019 Member
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    *Says stupid things like "I love you no matter how much you weigh"

    tumblr_inline_mhit11ktId1qz4rgp.gif

    tumblr_lxrlrtZuR31qjzzyw.gif
    How dare he not attach conditions for his love to some arbitrary number on a scale! The nerve!
  • beckyboop712
    beckyboop712 Posts: 383 Member
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    When I'm doing home exercise videos my husband will walk into the room and cheer me on. Usually it's when I'm in an awkward position and he yells "get it! get it! get them ****ers", which totally throws me off because I'm laughing too hard to continue. :grumble:

    He'll also wait until I only have like 200-300 calories left for the day and then decide he wants pizza for supper. :sad: So now I just hide leftover pizza in the fridge in the vegetable drawer, so he doesn't eat it all before I can have some for breakfast. I also hide soda cans in there too or else he'd devour them all.

    He also likes to surprise me with those giant king snickers bars. :noway: So I hide those in the freezer (if I wait to long to eat it, he'll rescind the offer and gobble it all up). lol

    Now I know where to stash the chocolate! He doesn't go near the veggie drawer. Hehehe :devil:

    Speaking of which, he'll come home from wherever he was (he works from home so whenever he comes home from meetings or on-site work) with "supplies" for the weekend....meaning candy bars and soda. @$$hole!!:laugh:
  • melinda200208
    melinda200208 Posts: 525 Member
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    .
  • HeelsAndBoxingGloves
    HeelsAndBoxingGloves Posts: 916 Member
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    * I ask him to buy me fresh almonds, hazelnuts, etc....and he brings home 10 pounds. And eats them all by the next day.
    * He makes me help move mulch all weekend, to make my beautiful garden more beautiful...and causes me to gain 5 lbs in water weight!
    * He tells me he loves me all the time....pssha, whatever. Everyone knows he's just trying to get into my pants
    * He cooks, and cleans, and vacuums, and folds clothes because he thinks that will win him some sort of brownie points or something....to get into my pants.
    * He weighs the food he cooks me down to the ounce....but then he EATS a piece of it and messes up my diary for the WHOLE WEEK!!!!!

    What a douche-noodle!

    douche-noodle! I love it! hahaha
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,793 Member
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    ....as opposed to be a supportive douche?

    What kind of person would call their mate a douche?
  • faithsimmons526
    faithsimmons526 Posts: 162 Member
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    ....as opposed to be a supportive douche?

    What kind of person would call their mate a douche?

    The kind with an unsupportive douche for a mate ... of course, if you read between the lines, in most cases you'll find that the comments are tongue in cheek.
  • vtmoon
    vtmoon Posts: 3,436 Member
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    ....as opposed to be a supportive douche?

    What kind of person would call their mate a douche?

    The kind with an unsupportive douche for a mate ... of course, if you read between the lines, in most cases you'll find that the comments are tongue in cheek.

    Now this here is funny.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
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    ....as opposed to be a supportive douche?

    What kind of person would call their mate a douche?
    C'mon roadie. I thought you were better than to not get clear satire.
  • lisas1019
    lisas1019 Posts: 30
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    Before me and my husband broke up, he wouldn't let me go to the gym.. always took me out to eat etc. He was afraid if I got too fit I would leave him. Now there's a DOUCHE!