I Lack Discipline

nobadkitty
nobadkitty Posts: 95
in Motivation and Support
Anyone else struggle with this? I have so far conquered my diet, I am doing a strict LC/keto type of diet, which has done amazing things for me for the past 6 months (down 25 lbs since last August).

What happens is I find myself slipping. I don't have a set routine in my life, I very much live in the present, I do whatever I need to do for the day but then am free to basically whatever I want to.

I tell myself I will go to the gym, or go for a long walk, then I put it off til afternoon, then in the afternoon, meh....and sometimes I have this crappy negative self-talk, "Oh you've been a chunk since you were 6 years old, like anything is going to change?" "You've been dieting since you were 12, it always comes back" blah blah blah. Well, I want to tell that ****ty talk to stuff it because I really want to weigh what I should. I am like 49% BF, UGH just wanna lose 50 more lbs and will be happy.

Any ideas? Mantras that people use? Ways to stomp down on that negative self talk? Should I just make a daily routine? Thanks :))))

Replies

  • runnergirl787
    runnergirl787 Posts: 10 Member
    Although it may be difficult to do, I make myself get up before work and get my running in. I found that it was easier to make excuses not to go in the evening, and sometimes like just gets in the way too. Committing to doing it first thing in the morning is the best way to go for me. The first week was very hard because I just wanted to sleep in longer, but after the first week was over, I felt more motivated to get up each morning. Now when I don't get up (rest days, etc) I feel more lethargic all day. They say it takes 21 days to make or break a habit. Give yourself a goal, whether it's working out in the morning or anything else. Force yourself to do it every single day, and soon it will become part of your daily routine. Longevity is the key to successful weight loss, so pick something that you love to do so it'll be more likely that you stick with it.

    Good luck!!
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
    Negative self talk stops now. You're human - humans stumble. So accept that you're going to stumble - like tell yourself you'll go to the gym only to find an excuse not to. Been there - done that - got the t-shirt! LOL

    I remember why I started (April 2011). I went to a school event with my daughter where I had a hard time walking to the front door. I had to stop several times along the way, and sit down in the hallway with people climbing over me because I was so out of shape - then had the nerve to tell the staff it was their fault for making me walk so far. As painful as it was, I don't want to forget that moment. I don't want to be in that condition/position again.

    I had surgery back at the end of March, had a difficult recovery, went to Disney the second week of June, and just turned 47 on Friday. Today is my first day back on the band-wagon. I went to weigh-in and REALLY didn't want to, and gained 18 pounds since May 8. I'm sure *some* of it is water weight from having so much salt....we'll see how much comes off next week though.

    I've still lost 128 so far, which is no slouch. Yeah, I had a Dr. Pepper with lunch. So be it. According to today's number, I have right at about 100-103 pounds left to lose before I reach my initial goal. I'll re-assess if I want to go a little further when I get there. I'll call the surgeon to develop a plan to get rid of the excess skin after about 50-60 pounds. We've set another date to go to Disney - in 2016. (This time, I wanted to be able to walk around the park without having issues with my back and be able to ride the rides - accomplished. Next time, I want to be able to go swimming with my kids.)

    Things I tell myself: "The voice inside your head that says you can't do this is a liar." "If you're tired of starting over, quit giving up."

    People are so willing to offer their opinions on what you should do, and who they know who did some grapefruit diet thing that worked or something. What they don't realize is, you didn't ask for their "shoulda/woulda/coulda" advice. My dad has a favorite "quote" from Lincoln that's something to the effect of: "Best keep the mouth shut and thought a fool than open it and remove all doubt." I tell myself to not let the fools (who don't know me and don't know what I've been through to get here) derail me.

    One other thought: I've watched Top Chef in the past - and one of the Voltaggio brothers was likened to Picasso due to his talent. And he is very talented. I can't remember if it was him or one of the others on the show who said he doesn't look at the ingredients going, "Oh my gosh, how am I going to make something with THIS?" as if it's a bad thing. It was said something like, "Okay, this is what I have to work with. What CAN I make with this?" It was all a matter of perspective, and what he chose to focus on. Focus on where you want to be. Not where you were or how you got there. Yes, acknowledge where you were, and be introspective of what things got you there so you can deal with those issues and move forward. But don't use those things, like lack of discipline hold you back or stay an excuse. If you can't handle having Hershey's Nuggets with Almonds in the house, don't bring them in the house. Get a bag on the way to work, open it when you get there, count out your 4, and give the rest to the people at work. Find ways to have your comfort foods in a way that won't totally sabotage your efforts.

    Well - for what it's worth - and hope I'm not in the "fools" category! :)
  • SarahIluvatariel
    SarahIluvatariel Posts: 96 Member
    I was SO not a morning person.

    But then I started getting up early and going to the gym before work on the weekdays. I've realized that it REALLY helps me feel better right from the start of my day. I usually had lots of back or neck pain when I woke up each day. Maybe due to being overweight? Or maybe just the way I sleep? But regardless, I LOVE the feeling of having more energy right after the gym. (actually, I get a little antsy sitting around at work all day, now) And I also LOVE the fact that the morning gym routine seems to loosen me up and work out all the kinks that are causing me pain. So, I literally feel better afterwards.

    Most of the time when I tell people I go to the gym in the mornings, they're like, "Ooh! Yeah, it's probably nice to get it out of the way so you have the rest of the day free". And although that's not my reasoning at all, at the same time, I realize that they're probably right. ;)

    Anyways, I typically think of my self as lacking discipline, too. But when I find something with enough benefits, that gives me good motivation. So... I don't know if my experience will help, but maybe it's something you could try... For either the reasons I do it, or for the reasons other people say it's a good idea.

    I've also been overweight most of my life. I recently found a set of old school photos (one from each year), and my mini-goal weight/image to break past is my 9th grade photo. I think my body fat was probably the lowest, then (although I was still overweight.) So I'm working towards that look, right now. (My ultimate goal is even less body fat, though.) So you could use your past as a negative memory that gets you down. Or you could try to look at it as a goal to become healthier than that. You HAVE lost weight. So you know it's possible. Same here. It was almost shocking for me to realize: I DO have control over my weight, after all.

    Honestly, I had previously thought that since I had always been overweight that maybe there was actually something wrong with me. Or maybe it was just in my genes. Or that I didn't have any discipline at all (for portion control or for sticking with it) and that I'd never be able to lose weight, so I never even tried. I But now I KNOW that that isn't true. Because now I've SEEN myself lose weight. And that in itself is motivation to keep working at it.

    Anyways... Hope this helps...
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
    Sorry for being so long winded - just remembered: When I went to join the gym, I joined the one that is 1.5 miles from my house. It's literally on the way home, so I have no excuse not to stop there, or go get my stuff at home and come back. I purposefully didn't join this other gym due to it's proximity to the Dairy Queen. I know I would have treated myself far more than I'd work out.
  • jljshoe1979
    jljshoe1979 Posts: 325 Member


    What happens is I find myself slipping. I don't have a set routine in my life, I very much live in the present, I do whatever I need to do for the day but then am free to basically whatever I want to.


    Any ideas? Mantras that people use? Ways to stomp down on that negative self talk? Should I just make a daily routine? Thanks :))))

    I personally think you do have discipline because you were able to follow a diet plan and lose 25 lbs. That's awesome!!! I believe you hit the nail on the head with saying you don't have a "set routine", especially in the afternoons. However you have to be doing something in the afternoons to pass the day away...

    This is just a thought. After you read this post, go take a 5 minute or 10 minute walk (you don't have to power walk or anything, just enjoy it) - come back and tell us how it made you feel. If you liked it, cling to that feeling and do it again tomorrow. Feel free to add me as a friend (being more active consistently is something I struggle with too).
  • nobadkitty
    nobadkitty Posts: 95
    Thanks for all of these responses you guys - I appreciate the time you took out to give me ideas, and I truly appreciate the encouragement. I think getting up early is a great idea, I think the idea of getting up right now for a walk is fantastic, I'll be back on to post. I just need to get out there and DO IT! :)))
  • Polly758
    Polly758 Posts: 623 Member
    Negative self-talk has to be replaced with positive self-talk. Write down all the ****ty things you tell yourself, then write down a positive thing to answer yourself back with. Those will work as mantras, too.
  • JForsythe0970
    JForsythe0970 Posts: 18
    Thanks for the posting. I have been beating myself up for the past two months. I made my first year on MFP awesome. I lost 40 pounds and went from a 24 to a 16. Then something happened. All of the sudden I couldn't remember how to get myself to the gym and completely forgot whatever healthy stuff I had been eating. It seems like I just can't eat enough and I have no idea how I was feeling so great on 1600 calories a day before. I feel like I have amnesia and have no idea how I was burning enough calories every day. I've been eating close to 1600 calories before I even get home for dinner every day. I really think I need to become a morning gym person. I think I got lost when I started filling up my evenings with other activities instead of exercise. That led to lots of bad night eating. That then led to getting up later and later each morning. That then led to stopping for fast food breakfast even when there was wheat bread at home. Maybe I just needed a break or something, but I need to get back on track now. I have to commit to going back to what I was doing a year ago. Going to the gym and taking walks and running around the block at night have to become a priority again. Without the exercise at least five days a week, I turned into a lazy sloth. For me, it all starts with the exercise and I need to refocus on it again. Thanks for reminding me where I started and how to get back there.
  • g2geowol
    g2geowol Posts: 8
    Reading a book now about thinking like a thin person. (the Beck diet solution). It was recommended by my nutrionist, though the book is written by a psychologist. The entire book is all about the mind and how powerful it is. It recommends things like listing all the reasons that you want to lose weight and reading that list several times a day every single day. The theory is that the more you fill your brain with the reasons you want to lose the weight, the less powerful the occasional sabotaging self talk will be.

    One of the mantras I've taken from the book is about Training. Which muscle do you really want to train? Every time you resist something you shouldn't do, you're strengthening your tendency to resist in the future. Each time you give in and eat something you shouldn't, you're strengthening your tendency to give in. Again, which muscle do you want to train?

    Make your workout goal a priority. Schedule it like your life depends on it. Every time you schedule it and follow through, you will be strengthening the muscle that makes daily workouts your routine. Good luck!
  • vlivengood
    vlivengood Posts: 23
    I agree with a lot of you MORNINGS the key. No matter how hard I tried to get my car to take me to the gym after work it just never would! There are very few excuses to come up with at the crack of dawn before the day has happened.

    A few things have helped me stick to it:

    + Remind myself that never once have I finished a work out and gone CRAP! I wish I didn't do that :)

    + Tell myself that all I have to do is get to the gym, if I get there and decided all I want to do is walk real slow and watch TV, or go in jacuzzi or sauna then that is all I have to do, but just go, I have never actually decided once I got there to not work out :)

    + Make a friend with someone in the gym or locker room that you start to see regularly, that way someone is expecting you and if your not there will ask you where were you? When you have to make those excuses out loud to someone other than yourself it's much harder

    +Remind myself that if I work out I can eat a little more that day and not feel as guilty for every morsel i put in my mouth

    +If you can rent a locker at your Gym a good trick is to put ALL your make up or hair styling products in there so YOU have to go there in order to get ready

    + start taking a class you like having a set time to be somewhere helps

    That being said we all struggle, keep up the great work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • 3xpr3ss
    3xpr3ss Posts: 13
    Thank you for listing " What helped me stick to it " . Those are very good points. Some I will even try myself. Again thank you.
  • g2geowol
    g2geowol Posts: 8
    Love these! Great ideas. Thanks for sharing!

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