i just cried resisting the urge to eat junk food (binge)

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  • amanda3jam
    amanda3jam Posts: 3 Member
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    OMG where have you been these past few months. I totaly understand your struggle. I have those same feelings towards food. Unfortunantly I havent always been as strong as you and I did some pretty unhealthy things! I think that momment that you experienced, although emotional draining, was a milestone. You overcame a sticky situation before the fact. You have come to the realizitation that there is an alternative and you CAN choose a different route! Good for you! Stay Strong! You can do this! Add me :)
  • jen_zz
    jen_zz Posts: 1,011 Member
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    You were self aware, that's a great thing. It was difficult but you pushed through, should be congratulating yourself on your progress!:flowerforyou:
  • dianamatienzo
    dianamatienzo Posts: 127
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    I have so much respect for you <3 You're not weak for feeling that way; you're so strong for stopping yourself! I actually was going to go into the kitchen to get some junk and eat more than I need. Thanks to you, I've convinced myself it's not worth it. I used to binge until I was sick, and I still do so sometimes (not NEARLY as often or badly as before), but lately I've stopped myself sooner or just been overeating slightly. I know EXACTLY how you feel. You're not crazy :) I feel the same way when I have the stupidest arguments in my own head about eating something, and I also get into the mindset of "I already decided I'm eating it, so it's done; I'm eating it." It's so relieving hearing other's struggles in this same journey. You're helped me more than you can imagine with just this post :') Thank you! Great job! It's a HUGE step in the right direction :]
  • Kristafulbright
    Kristafulbright Posts: 2
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    I once heard a dietician advise that if you are eating at least 3 servings of fruit a day, the craving for processed sugar will go away. Perhaps this is just all in my head, but it works for me!
  • monjacq1964
    monjacq1964 Posts: 291 Member
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    I woke up and my daughter's birthday cake was on the table while the family was away and i wanted to eat it so bad. I didn't even think about it, i decided I AM GOING to eat this. And it was crazy. At lightning speed when i decided i was going to stuff my mouth full of as much birthday cake as i could (probably not even leaving any for my own kid!) i ALSO decided since i was eating this, i was also going to go out and get burger king and sit down and watch a movie and i got so happy thinking about it. In my head i gotta feeling "this is a fun thing to do!". Then literally right when i was getting a spatula to scoop out a couple pieces of cake for myself my mood just did a 180 and i realized, like a scene out of a movie, i'm screwing up. I saw myself in this eerie 3rd person view: an overweight 29 year old guy choosing to eat junk food knowing he has a problem with his weight. And just that image of a fat guy eating his kid's birthday cake was the most disgusting image i could have ever hoped to be.

    What the hell am i doing? What's wrong with me? I'm trying to change my life and lose this weight that's been holding me down for so many years in so many areas of my life. I'm ashamed of the way i look, i hate being seen, i'm not confident, i think about my weight EVERY day and wish i could be skinny and healthy and here i am putting fuel to the fire making my situation even worse. This isn't the man i aspired to be. I wanted to be so much more than just a fat guy succumbing to his weakness of food in a kitchen. I thought about all of this and it just hit me so hard i got emotional. Despite how emotional i was, i couldn't stop thinking "the decision is made. I decided to eat all this crap right now and i'm going to do it!". I was at this pathetic tug of war with the decision to do this or stop and it was...crazy. Like a drug addict detoxing fighting his urge to use again, i was in the kitchen crying because i wanted this food so bad and i knew even though it would do damage to me and my life, i wanted it anyway. SO bad.

    I just stood there. For 20 minutes in the kitchen staring at the cake like a crazy person getting emotional over eating it. Ugh. I feel mental for even going through this. How weak am i mentally? I felt so pathetic even having this dialogue with myself. Getting emotional and telling myself "NO! You are overweight and it's screwing up your life! If you binge, it won't be just this once. It's a chain reaction of screwups and if you don't take a stand right freaking now, you may never be happy again!". So...i ate a lower portion controlled meal and now i'm about to drive to the park for a walk. I want to eat junk so bad. Not just a little, ALOT. But i can't continue screwing up my life like this. I'm done. Everything i want in my life would've disappeared with that binge and i want so much more for myself. I've wasted my 20's and i sure as hell am not going to waste my 30s. I've got alot of time to make up for
    you are not pathetic for having had that dialogue with yourself. You are awesome!!!! that is incredibly that you did that, and dient end up eating the cake. Hugs, my friend.
  • JAGWIRE13579
    JAGWIRE13579 Posts: 63
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    Food can be a terrible addiction, it hits all the pleasure spots in the brain just like an opiate. I think the worst part of being addicted to food is it's almost impossible to avoid all of your triggers. Imagine asking an alcoholic to only drink 3 small drinks per day or having a crack addict handle crack rocks everyday but not to smoke it when everyone else around them is smoking. You did a great job thinking it through and figuring out what was going on in your head not your stomach. There are support groups for food addicts and there are places to go online to figure out if you have a true food addiction. It really is true, you have to take it one day at a time. Don't think about not eating unhealthy food for the rest of your life, just think about getting through today.
  • xxxclf
    xxxclf Posts: 1 Member
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    This is a very old thread but just wanted to say thank you as last night I burst into tears in the supermarket as I felt like all I wanted was yummy bad food and the end result was I stormed out of the shop without any dinner. Forced myself to have something healthy which I didn't enjoy at the time but was glad i hadn't resisted later on and go for a walk . It's so hard finding someone who understands, the people i live with just do not understand the hold junk food has over me!
  • ekim2016
    ekim2016 Posts: 1,199 Member
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    good job man... you are the boss, not the junk food... you just kicked butt...
  • 150poundsofme
    150poundsofme Posts: 523 Member
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    I understand the need to eat that cake and go get fast food and continue on with the binge for weeks, even months. It sounds like me except YOU BEAT A BINGE!!!!!!!! i beat a binge once time, it was the most amazing thing - I wrote that I wanted to eat on-line and then I took the dog for a walk. i beat a binge. I was thrilled. But unfortunately that was a few years ago, just one time. You did some thorough talking you yourself. So proud of you! I need to learn from you.
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 17,959 Member
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    150poundsofme wrote: »
    I understand the need to eat that cake and go get fast food and continue on with the binge for weeks, even months. It sounds like me except YOU BEAT A BINGE!!!!!!!! i beat a binge once time, it was the most amazing thing - I wrote that I wanted to eat on-line and then I took the dog for a walk. i beat a binge. I was thrilled. But unfortunately that was a few years ago, just one time. You did some thorough talking you yourself. So proud of you! I need to learn from you.

    That's ok, so was this one ;)

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