Shortening my sprinter's femurs?

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LiftAllThePizzas
LiftAllThePizzas Posts: 17,857 Member
in Fitness and Exercise
Don't get me wrong, I like being fast and if I had to choose between being too fast or being too slow, just call me Usain Bolt. However, since I'm not a world-class tennis sprinter, I 'd like to shorten my femurs and look more manly.
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Replies

  • KatLifter
    KatLifter Posts: 1,314 Member
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    All you need is a chainsaw and a sewing kit.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    What if you just lengthened the rest of your body to match?

    Like do pilates, but not with your legs. Only arm and core pilates? Don't work your legs at all during your workout.....then your arms and torso will get lengthened but your legs will stay proportional?
  • da_bears10089
    da_bears10089 Posts: 1,791 Member
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    I'm sure you can get put on a Femur Transplant list for people that don't need theirs anymore or desire to have longer ones.
  • cleotherio
    cleotherio Posts: 712 Member
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    Definitely don't do yoga, pilates or take up swimming. Those all make your legs longer.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    Just do squats. Isn't that why they're called "squats". Because they make you squat?

    squat·tersquat·test
    Definition of SQUAT

    1
    : sitting with the haunches close above the heels
    2
    a : low to the ground
    b : marked by disproportionate shortness or thickness
  • EatClean_WashUrNuts
    EatClean_WashUrNuts Posts: 1,590 Member
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    C4 works best
  • billsica
    billsica Posts: 4,741 Member
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    You need to eat more white carbs. Rice, potato, breads.
  • Pangea250
    Pangea250 Posts: 965 Member
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    All you need is a chainsaw and a sewing kit.
    Or glue. Krazy Glue.
  • DragonSquatter
    DragonSquatter Posts: 957 Member
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    Just do squats. Isn't that why they're called "squats". Because they make you squat?

    squat·tersquat·test
    Definition of SQUAT

    1
    : sitting with the haunches close above the heels
    2
    a : low to the ground
    b : marked by disproportionate shortness or thickness

    37936558.jpg
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
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    I'm honestly not sure if this post is serious...

    Just in case it is - OP, you're using the wrong terminology. Your femur is your thigh bone and there is no way to shorten (or lengthen) it once you're a full grown adult. Unless, as others have suggested, you use some sort of explosive of cutting tool or get surgery.

    Do you mean you want your thighs to be bulkier? In that case, the squat suggestion is spot on.

    P.S. However, you won't build muscle on a calorie deficit, or at least no more than a bit of newbie gains. You're pretty close to goal now so maybe look into doing some bulk/cut cycles?
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
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    I'm honestly not sure if this post is serious...

    Just in case it is - OP, you're using the wrong terminology. Your femur is your thigh bone and there is no way to shorten (or lengthen) it once you're a full grown adult. Unless, as others have suggested, you use some sort of explosive of cutting tool or get surgery.

    Do you mean you want your thighs to be bulkier? In that case, the squat suggestion is spot on.

    P.S. However, you won't build muscle on a calorie deficit, or at least no more than a bit of newbie gains. You're pretty close to goal now so maybe look into doing some bulk/cut cycles?

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1040979-de-bulking-athletic-butt-thighs
  • SrJoben
    SrJoben Posts: 484 Member
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    Don't get me wrong, I like being fast and if I had to choose between being too fast or being too slow, just call me Usain Bolt. However, since I'm not a world-class tennis sprinter, I 'd like to shorten my femurs and look more manly.

    I-I love you.




    No homo.
  • ihad
    ihad Posts: 7,463 Member
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    The key is maintaining a consistent calcium deficit, but not going too low, or you'll go into brittle mode.
  • M8R5on8ym
    M8R5on8ym Posts: 23 Member
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    All you need is a chainsaw and a sewing kit.

    And a world class surgeon like I had to shorten my left leg!!

    I basically had the choice of having 1.5" removed or https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRpkpyd_ZW4

    My surgeon actually studied at this guy's (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gavriil_Abramovich_Ilizarov) clinic in Serbia!!
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
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    Can I have what you manage to lose? Cause I could use an inch of two; I'm not saying being short is awful but honestly it's kind of disgusting and makes me lack grace, you know? Also I can't see the top of my refrigerator.
  • CoderGal
    CoderGal Posts: 6,800 Member
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    Don't get me wrong, I like being fast and if I had to choose between being too fast or being too slow, just call me Usain Bolt. However, since I'm not a world-class tennis sprinter, I 'd like to shorten my femurs and look more manly.
    Compact the hell out of your muscle...I mean muscles. I hear that will lengthen other parts so your femurs won't look so long.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    Can I have what you manage to lose? Cause I could use an inch of two; I'm not saying being short is awful but honestly it's kind of disgusting and makes me lack grace, you know? Also I can't see the top of my refrigerator.


    It's not your legs that are making you lack grace.....it's your butt :wink:
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
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    Can I have what you manage to lose? Cause I could use an inch of two; I'm not saying being short is awful but honestly it's kind of disgusting and makes me lack grace, you know? Also I can't see the top of my refrigerator.

    You don't want to see the top of your refrigerator. Unless you are a 50s stay-at-home-wife and you actually clean up there.

    Wait. I'm confused. Which thread is this?
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
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    Can I have what you manage to lose? Cause I could use an inch of two; I'm not saying being short is awful but honestly it's kind of disgusting and makes me lack grace, you know? Also I can't see the top of my refrigerator.


    It's not your legs that are making you lack grace.....it's your butt :wink:

    This makes sense; my butt is considerable AND I'm very clumsy. The logic seems to check out. I'm going to go find my mom and make her take these genes backs right now.


    Can I have what you manage to lose? Cause I could use an inch of two; I'm not saying being short is awful but honestly it's kind of disgusting and makes me lack grace, you know? Also I can't see the top of my refrigerator.


    You don't want to see the top of your refrigerator. Unless you are a 50s stay-at-home-wife and you actually clean up there.

    Wait. I'm confused. Which thread is this?

    But my husband hides my allowance up there!
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    The key is maintaining a consistent calcium deficit, but not going too low, or you'll go into brittle mode.

    FTW
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