Unsupportive comments when eating with others...

Going from anorexia to bulking has been hard, people are always saying "you eat so much!!" but then I remember that food is awesome and anyone who makes you feel ashamed or guilty for eating whatever you damn well please can go to hell IMO

lol:laugh:

Oh my gosh! I know this feeling for sure.
Like when you eat a small ish sized plate and pass on desert, people look at you like you've grown 2 heads or something.
I've had family ask me if i'm sick, or not feeling well when i don't eat what looks like a decent amount to them

I was recently travelling with some friends and one of them took it upon herself to comment on pretty much EVERYTHING that I put into my mouth. I had some snacks that I kept in our hotel room -- almonds, cottage cheese, bananas, apples, rice cakes -- which are all things that I genuinely LIKE to eat because I think they taste good, but well, they're not chocolate bars. I'd grab a banana, and this girl would go, "Oh, look at you with your little banana being all healthy!" Honestly, I just tried to ignore it because although it was annoying and weird, I don't think think she meant it maliciously.

The kicker was when our group went out for Italian one night and I ordered a chilli prawn pasta because 1) I love chilli prawn pasta and 2) the menu description made it sound like it was just tossed in oil, garlic, and chilli rather than in a rich sauce. Turned out the menu was misleading, and it came out drenched in a thick, creamy garlic sauce. Oh, well, I had ordered a side salad as well, so I ate that first, and then had maybe about a third to half of the pasta. The girl shook her finger at me and goes, "Well, that's better! We needed to get some cream into you, you've been FAR too healthy this week!" and started laughing. I just stared at her in a sort of confused disbelief -- and it was kind of nice that the others at the table had exactly the same reaction as me. Later, one of them even took this girl aside and flat-out told her to stop talking about my food because it was none of her business.

The next day, she apologised to me and said that watching me make healthier choices made her feel guilty for eating her favourite foods. I tried to assure her that I was honestly just eating in the way that made me feel best, and I wasn't making any judgements about what others preferred to eat, but I'm not sure whether she believed me or not. In any case, she finally shut up about my food!

Yep. Sometimes my family will go to local restaurants that I know don't have any remotely healthy options. So, I'll have a big snack before and cook myself up a healthy dinner after. My mother refers to me as her "anorexic daughter" whenever possible.

Also, all of my friends are the "eat crap and don't exercise" thin type. So when I eat with them I look like the stereotypical fat girl with a salad from like a movie or something.

When I first started eating healthier and was still quite heavy at the time, I would often get the "Oh you're eating healthy? Are you on a diet or something?" comment from friends and family. I always gave the same answer: "No, no diet. I'm just trying to eat healthier." And that was the 100% truth. I've never looked my weight loss as a "diet." I've only looked at it as a permanent change and as becoming a new person.

Also when I was just starting out, my dad used to occasionally make comments whenever I would indulge in any small treat. Even if it was a 60 calorie chocolate pudding cup that was my only indulgence all day, because I was eating CHOCOLATE and not only grilled chicken/fish and veggies, he would make the occasional remark about how eating junk food will make me gain weight. I used to get offended and bothered by it. But I now realize why he made those comments: because I was just starting to eat healthy and lose weight at that time, he was trying in his own way to help me to not revert back to my old habits. He definitely could have been more tactful about it, but still. I now know that his intentions were good, even if it came out wrong! :laugh: And now? Well, with 3 years passed, 50+ lbs lost, and finally arriving at (and maintaining) a very healthy weight, my dad never makes such comments anymore, even if I have a bad day and pig out on junk food right in front of him. I've shown him that I won't revert back to my old habits and the only comments he makes now are how proud he is of me and how healthy and lovely I look now.

The only comments I get now are the ever-so-annoying "What are you only eating that for? You're skinny now! You don't need to diet anymore!" comments. But I've learned not to be bothered by these remarks anymore. The people who say things like this mean well, they're just ridiculously uninformed (and more times than not, they're also significantly overweight themselves). So now I just smile and say, "Well, eating the way I used to eat is what made me gain all that weight in the first place. I don't want to go back to that." Shuts them up every time. :bigsmile: