Unexpected wake-up call

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I was at a friend's baby's 1st birthday party yesterday, surrounded by people I didn't know... and I overheard my friend's mom, who wanted to get a picture of me with her daughter and the baby, call me "the big one" (she couldn't remember my name). She didn't know I heard her, and I didn't say anything. I could tell my friend was SUPER embarrassed and she quickly corrected her mom; but wow... what a wake-up call.

I am definitely the largest I've EVER been... and as tacky and rude as it may have been for her to say that, I think it was exactly what I needed to hear. Fortunately for my self esteem, but unfortunately for my health and motivation, I've accepted my weight and size a long time ago... but my biggest fear is potentially embarrassing my daughter (she's only 11 months old right now) one day by being the "fat mom"... and that comment hit home.

Sometimes wake-up calls come at the strangest times :)

Replies

  • TeachTheGirl
    TeachTheGirl Posts: 2,091 Member
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    Aw, I'm sorry you had to experience the 'wake up call' that way, but you seemed to take it in your stride!

    Like you, I have a young daughter and I'm hoping I can get to a point where I never talk negatively about my body or weight around her so I can teach her self-love without being a hypocrite. =)
  • ChristyU74
    ChristyU74 Posts: 234 Member
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    That was a rude thing of her to say, and I'm sorry that you had to hear it. But if it helps to motivate you, then all the better! Keep your head up and don't let others bring you down! And your daughter will love you regardless, but one of my biggest motivators was being a good example to my children and also being able to play with them without getting winded! :) All the best to you on your journey! Show your daughter what a healthy, strong woman is!
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,742 Member
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    One of mine was a former job where they constantly took photos of everyone on staff. Even at 280+ lbs I'd never really minded the camera until then, because I always had photos from the boobs or neck up, face shots, stood in the back since I'm tall, stood next to my much larger ex-husband, etc.

    But that was no longer an option at this job. Seated with rolls showing. In action with the double chin I NEVER thought I had. Looking horrible in an outfit I thought was slimming. That was all a huge wakeup call for me, and even after I knocked off a quite few lb and felt better about myself, I still cringed every single time the company "photographers" came into the room at events. Horrid.
  • aliasbee
    aliasbee Posts: 27
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    For me recently, it was getting new pants with room around the waist, and "outgrowing" them when I usually only buy new pants every few years.

    I think it's usually a whole bunch of little things, but sometimes the last one is especially shocking when it piles up.
  • callas444
    callas444 Posts: 261 Member
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    I have had some wake up calls over the years but what ultimately brought me here was a special moment in May. My 14 year old son won a special award at school. I took off work to go to the awards ceremony. They called his name and in front of the whole junior high school, I walked to him and gave him a carnation. As I hugged my child, I heard one of his classmates loudly say, "Oh my God!" Here it was his special moment, and I realize how embarrassing it must be to hug your 350 pound mother in front of your class. It is bad enough I have screwed up my own life but I'll be damned if I will be an embarrassment to my child.
  • 4michellelong
    4michellelong Posts: 23 Member
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    It is hard when you know that you have work to do. However, when someone points it out tactlessly, that makes you even more insecure. My unfortunate wake up call was from an emergency room bed.
  • slhall0822
    slhall0822 Posts: 128 Member
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    I have had some wake up calls over the years but what ultimately brought me here was a special moment in May. My 14 year old son won a special award at school. I took off work to go to the awards ceremony. They called his name and in front of the whole junior high school, I walked to him and gave him a carnation. As I hugged my child, I heard one of his classmates loudly say, "Oh my God!" Here it was his special moment, and I realize how embarrassing it must be to hug your 350 pound mother in front of your class. It is bad enough I have screwed up my own life but I'll be damned if I will be an embarrassment to my child.

    Kids can be so cruel, especially teenagers. I'm sorry you had to hear that, but I feel ya on the embarrassment thing. But look at us... here on myfitnesspal, staying motivated and making changes :)
  • tm82001
    tm82001 Posts: 133 Member
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    Ouch...that hurts!! I am sorry that she said that (rude as heck). You came to the right place to share, since many (if not all) of us have been there. You can do this!! One day at a time...
  • Mama530
    Mama530 Posts: 605 Member
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    I feel for you. It took one of those moments to help propel my motivation. It hurt, but I look back at it and I'm grateful for that moment.
  • CatAMcC
    CatAMcC Posts: 166 Member
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    I was at a friend's baby's 1st birthday party yesterday, surrounded by people I didn't know... and I overheard my friend's mom, who wanted to get a picture of me with her daughter and the baby, call me "the big one" (she couldn't remember my name). She didn't know I heard her, and I didn't say anything. I could tell my friend was SUPER embarrassed and she quickly corrected her mom; but wow... what a wake-up call.

    I am definitely the largest I've EVER been... and as tacky and rude as it may have been for her to say that, I think it was exactly what I needed to hear. Fortunately for my self esteem, but unfortunately for my health and motivation, I've accepted my weight and size a long time ago... but my biggest fear is potentially embarrassing my daughter (she's only 11 months old right now) one day by being the "fat mom"... and that comment hit home.

    Sometimes wake-up calls come at the strangest times :)

    WHat a great way to turn something that could have brought you down into a wake up call. We should all at times try this attitude. Well done! Good luck in your journey :-)
  • kindasortachewy
    kindasortachewy Posts: 1,084 Member
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    Fantastic outlook and positivity OP! You rock!!


    Just wait for that baby's 2nd brithday, when you can show up and strut your fit bod!! :)


    I had my wake up call trying on wedding dresses for the first time, I saw a photo of me and my two sisters (older and much thinner than I) and when I saw the picture I realized that not even on my wedding day was I going to get to the pretty sister.



    BTW I got married July 4th and I WAS the pretty sister
  • NdigoBlue
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    Sorry you had to go through that people can be mean. My friends grandmother saw me after some time and I had gained weight and she said and you used to be so pretty. Well overweight or not I am beautiful. Sometimes others just cant see it! If you need motivation I can help
  • bdenitto
    bdenitto Posts: 210 Member
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    My daughter is the reason my husband and I committed to getting healthy. We were looking at pictures and realized that there was a good chance one or both of us would be missing from future big moments if we didn't do something. I know it hurt to hear your friend's mom but use it as motivation to make a change for you and your child.
  • Byrdsong1920
    Byrdsong1920 Posts: 335 Member
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    Wow, hugs from Atlanta! You are very mature and I'm so happy you shared here!

    God bless you....just know we are His creation and He loves us! We have these "temples" He's let us borrow while here on this earth:) lets honor Him and take care of it.....mentally and physically. You are doing that by simply being here and making daily changes to Be a better you...for yourself and for your daughter!

    Be encouraged sis!

    Shan
  • elly610
    elly610 Posts: 25 Member
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    You took that comment in such a positive way! I am glad you didn't let that get you down. People can be so cruel some times without even thinking about it. My son is my motivation to get healthy. I don't want to be the "fat mom" who sits on the sidelines. I want to be an active participant. :)
  • lovelyx091
    lovelyx091 Posts: 217 Member
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    I have had some wake up calls over the years but what ultimately brought me here was a special moment in May. My 14 year old son won a special award at school. I took off work to go to the awards ceremony. They called his name and in front of the whole junior high school, I walked to him and gave him a carnation. As I hugged my child, I heard one of his classmates loudly say, "Oh my God!" Here it was his special moment, and I realize how embarrassing it must be to hug your 350 pound mother in front of your class. It is bad enough I have screwed up my own life but I'll be damned if I will be an embarrassment to my child.

    Kids can be so cruel, especially teenagers. I'm sorry you had to hear that, but I feel ya on the embarrassment thing. But look at us... here on myfitnesspal, staying motivated and making changes :)

    Teenagers... ugh! I'm only 22 but I despise most teens. Whenever I see any teens in public they're staring me down and whispering and laughing at me. It's so annoying and it used to hurt, but now it's my motivation! Well, part of my motivation. Good luck to both of you ladies, we can do this!