Motivation when you have depression.
Replies
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You've gotten some great advice so far, especially sticking to a schedule, that helps me so much. I've had major depression on and off since I was 13 years old. It's so hard to find a reason to do anything when it feels like nothing has a purpose or any meaning or does anything anyway.
A big breakthrough for me was realizing that motivation comes and goes, but commitment does not. I stopped waiting for motivation and committed to going to the gym at least 4 days each week- no matter what. I committed to healthy eating. Not specifically for weight loss, but for my physical and mental health. For me, when I feel physically strong, I feel mentally stronger, like I can overcome everything, even the black cave that is depression.0 -
I'm a couple of weeks off meds because I don't really care and I don't feel so good. I am hoping that maybe changing my diet will save me $120 psychiatrist visit every three months and $30 a month in medication.
They say you lose weight on Wellbutrin but I didn't notice any change until I stopped then the scale went up. Way up.
Gained 9lbs in 2 weeks, erased my last mfp account, got a new account
So much junk food, zero motivation. I'm not working out. I might when it cools down but I'm not dealing with my kids separation anxiety if I drop them off in the gym daycare and like hell I'm going outdoors when it's 100F outside.
I have a goal now so I am trying to stay mindful of eating much much less and cutting the junk food completely. I ran out of money last pay period, and I think Jack in the Box and Taco Bell had a lot to do with that.
That Oatmeal comic made me feel very uncomfortable.
That doesn't sound like the effect of going off of your medication, other than that you've regressed. Please, go back to your doctor and go back on your medication. Spending a chunk of money every couple of months for something that was clearly helping you is a far cry better than going broke on junk food.
I'm going to second this. Please, please talk to your doctor. Depression is horrible and self-sabotaging in the ways you're describing. And that does seem expensive, but think about it this way: it's $2.50 a day. If you were lying on the couch, absolutely miserable, and someone said, "I can make it so it's not a struggle to do the things you want. Just give me $2.50", would you take them up on it?0 -
I like you. I am LIKE you! Your photos tell me allot. 3 out of 4 feature your kiddos.... One in particular tells me I may be correct in wondering if you have a bad case of "mommy-very-overwhelmed". I am in no means downplaying the seriousness or realness of clinical depression. But I also think that we moms aren't good at acknowledging what we do each day as a mom, and it can be depressing. And demotivating. You pour out your very life for these little ones, literally disappearing into this role of mom. Wife? Woman? Sister? Daughter? Friend? Who are they?
You are immersed in bodily functions of others, spend hours in the minivan, try to avoid chicken nuggets for the 4th day in the row, hurt your foot on mini legos, referee combat matches and try to hear your own voice above the voice of Dora. You plan playdates, swim lessons, birthday parties. You make star charts, clean cherrios off the floor, take the pets to the vet and if you are lucky snuggle in a rocking chair to read a book to a tiny person. And that is all by 10am. Every day. And it never really looks like you got anything done! You want to take care of yourself, but that feels selfish and you kind of forgot what that looks like anyway. Again, please, I am not saying you arent depressed. In fact you may still have post-partum symptoms. And regardless, depression and overwhelmed can go very hand in hand. I did get out of the cycle, you can see some before pictures on my site. But I have to work on maintaining it every day. And lest you think I have turned into one of those women who "decide not to be a mom anymore".... My kids are still my life. I was up all last night with a constipated two year old and an 8 year old who had gotten a bad spider scare. My 4 and 5 year olds are up this morning by 6 and needing hammers to work on finding ants under the bark in the fallen tree outside.... But I am going to finish my coffee and change my clothes and hit the kettlebell. I know I will feel better. I did actually ask my doctor for antidpressants. For me the choice each day has often felt like I can either take an Rx or exercise. What is one thing you can do today? Take a walk? Throw an exercise video on? Plan to eat three healthy meals at the table instead of between picking up toys and changing the laundry? It can be done! I am pulling for you! 0 -
I should, I just keep forgetting0
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you might look into and/or try:
st john's wort
a sublingual b12 tablet once or twice a day (check dosage, so get a smaller dose one) as you feel yourself especially dragging
vitamin D and fish or krill oils
rescue remedy
the B12 especially is helpful for me to get me up and going
ETA: I have 2 young kids, a bung thyroid and have been off and on meds (lexapro and wellbutrin) but both caused me to gain weight and killed sex drive so I try to help myself in other ways0 -
Depression definitely makes it hard to get motivated. You constantly look for inspiration because you feel hopeless and helpless and you want that shining moment of realization that you CAN do it, but it doesn't work that way. On days that I feel like this, I do 2 things: 1) eat an apple and 2) walk 10 minutes.
Two small things that help immensely- First, eating an apple is something I do every day anyway, so if I'm depressed and laying in bed planning to do nothing that day but throw on my pj's and drive to McDonald's for some crap food, I tell myself that I have to eat an apple first, and I do. Well at that point, I've started my day off with a healthy choice; might as well keep going, right?
Second, Walking 10 minutes doesn't sound as bad as even walking for 30 minutes when I'm having a dark day, and really it's only 10 minutes, I can do that...so after being outside for 10 minutes I could turn around, but I rarely do. Sometimes I even have to break it down: put on your shoes and go outside...start walking. If you only do 10 minutes, well great, you just walked for 10 minutes, but I bet that at the 10-minute mark, you'll figure you can do 10 (or 20, 30, etc.) more...SECOND healthy choice of the day!
After these two simple things, I get in the shower, and usually after that I'm feeling better than I was when I woke up. I must admit that sometimes I still go for a fast food lunch, or sometimes I just crawl back in bed, but either way, I still have a sense of personal achievement, which, for me, is the biggest motivator. If I did it today, I can do it tomorrow, or do MORE tomorrow, and each healthy choice is a tiny victory in my journey to lead a healthier life.
I can't guarantee that it will work for you, but when your depression gets the best of you, make small, easy choices that are healthy, and be happy about each one. Not every day will be like this, you will get through. If you keep having this type of day, however, call your doctor...sometimes a prescription change is the best option.
:flowerforyou:0 -
Did you have some experience with depression and overcoming it? Why don't you share your experience.I experienced depression once, it was very strange. I felt so vulnerable, like I would not be able to handle normal daily stresses.
My overall advice based on my own experience, is to gently steer yourself away from bad habits/patterns.
I overcame depression with natural means, check out St. John's Wort (an herb), as a medically recognized means of support for healing from depression.
Other supplements I took were recommended along with that herb, Omega's and vitamin D3. It takes 6 weeks to level out of depression.
Also, regular exercise.
Steer yourself back to regular sleep times, if that has been affected. The herb helps with that as well.
Give yourself not weeks, but months, to heal. It took me a solid 3 months to heal, and not feel like I was sliding down into depression again. I did feel "better" in 4 weeks. After 3 months, I slowly backed off the St. John's wort. Keep a bottle of the herb around for a period of time afterwards, just in case you need the support.
I am completely healed now, I don't ever take the herb. Although I have kept a bottle on hand in the wintertime for the past few years, as that historically was my most vulnerable time due to lack of sunshine and stress combined.
I am glad you are feeling better and it sounds like you experienced a placebo effect with the St. John's Wart. That pill is not recognized as an effective tool in treating depression. (although it has been marketed as such) Also, there is no time frame "to level out", as each individual will experience different symptoms and severity levels of depression. There must have been other changes associated with your decrease in symptoms and feeling better, but it was not the St. Johns Wart.
I am just throwing this out there for the OP for additional information. Again, I am glad that you are feeling better. :flowerforyou:
Not placebo. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/10/081007192435.htm0 -
For me, recognizing it as depression is the first and biggest hurdle. I might be alone in this, but realizing, "This is my depression talking," I can fight it better. It's not that my life sucks, it's the depression. Things aren't any worse than they were a couple weeks or months ago, it's the depression. I think of it like wearing glasses or contacts. My funked up eyesight makes things look all out of focus. My depression treats my brain the same way... it makes it so I can't see the world clearly.
Once it's identified, I can fight it. I know exercising will make me feel better, so I force myself to do that. I know eating balanced meals will make me feel better, so I force myself to do that (usually after realizing that, as delicious as they are, Snickers Squared only make me feel better for a few minutes). I have to actively LOOK for things that make me happy and bring my joy, whether it's going for a walk with the dog, hiking alone, reading, painting, listening to really good music, coloring my hair, etc.0 -
For me, recognizing it as depression is the first and biggest hurdle. I might be alone in this, but realizing, "This is my depression talking," I can fight it better. It's not that my life sucks, it's the depression. Things aren't any worse than they were a couple weeks or months ago, it's the depression. I think of it like wearing glasses or contacts. My funked up eyesight makes things look all out of focus. My depression treats my brain the same way... it makes it so I can't see the world clearly.
Once it's identified, I can fight it. I know exercising will make me feel better, so I force myself to do that. I know eating balanced meals will make me feel better, so I force myself to do that (usually after realizing that, as delicious as they are, Snickers Squared only make me feel better for a few minutes). I have to actively LOOK for things that make me happy and bring my joy, whether it's going for a walk with the dog, hiking alone, reading, painting, listening to really good music, coloring my hair, etc.
This works for me too. It took a long time (a lot of that in therapy) to learn how to recognize it, but if you can say to yourself "that's not me, that's the depression", it can help. Then it becomes something you can guard and fight against. It's like uncovering a saboteur in your head.0 -
I experienced depression once, it was very strange. I felt so vulnerable, like I would not be able to handle normal daily stresses.
My overall advice based on my own experience, is to gently steer yourself away from bad habits/patterns.
I overcame depression with natural means, check out St. John's Wort (an herb), as a medically recognized means of support for healing from depression.
Other supplements I took were recommended along with that herb, Omega's and vitamin D3. It takes 6 weeks to level out of depression.
Also, regular exercise.
Steer yourself back to regular sleep times, if that has been affected. The herb helps with that as well.
Give yourself not weeks, but months, to heal. It took me a solid 3 months to heal, and not feel like I was sliding down into depression again. I did feel "better" in 4 weeks. After 3 months, I slowly backed off the St. John's wort. Keep a bottle of the herb around for a period of time afterwards, just in case you need the support.
I am completely healed now, I don't ever take the herb. Although I have kept a bottle on hand in the wintertime for the past few years, as that historically was my most vulnerable time due to lack of sunshine and stress combined.
I am glad you are feeling better and it sounds like you experienced a placebo effect with the St. John's Wart. That pill is not recognized as an effective tool in treating depression. (although it has been marketed as such) Also, there is no time frame "to level out", as each individual will experience different symptoms and severity levels of depression. There must have been other changes associated with your decrease in symptoms and feeling better, but it was not the St. Johns Wart.
I am just throwing this out there for the OP for additional information. Again, I am glad that you are feeling better. :flowerforyou:
Actually, St. John's Wort has been shown, in clinical trials, to treat certain kinds of depression, namely, acute varieties ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St_John's_wort#Medicinal_uses ). So, she didn't necessarily get a placebo effect (though neither is it guaranteed to work for the original poster, but we won't get into the efficacy of antidepressants in general here).
Fair enough for maybe situational (minor) depression, in working together with a medical professional due to St. Johns Wart not being regulated by the FDA as other meds. This is especially true because of the possibility of severe interactions if taking any other meds. (and you are right, we won't get into antidepressant efficacy here. :flowerforyou: )0 -
Here is an article which you might find helpful.
http://depression.about.com/cs/altmedsjw/a/stjohnswort.htm
Hope you feel better.
Let us know how your chosen method of healing works out for you! :happy:0 -
I wish I had some good advice, but I don't. For me, I just sort of wait it out until I feel better again. There is lots of great advice in this thread though...hope some of it works for you, OP! :flowerforyou:0
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I've had severe depression for several years, it's only been a matter of months since I've had the mental energy to keep myself in some kind of shape. Getting a dog was the major stepping point for me, that forced me to move out of the house and walk. After a while I started to cut away some bad foods . Then I started to eat some healthy things. Then I started to cook a lot more. Then I started to work out.
Step by step progress is key I think, but sparking that will is largely dependant on the person and the current living situation. Dog was the spark for me, alongside therapy and meds.0 -
Didn't see anyone mention this...so will just put out what has worked for me. Do something nice for someone else. On those days when the black clouds make the idea of getting out of bed, taking a shower, etc are just more that I can face - I got to the phone and called an elderly shut in neighbor to see how she was doing. She was delighted that someone cared enough to call, and I felt better afterwards.
Hope you find things that work for you!0 -
When I was being seen for my depression, doctors always mentioned that exercise and eating better would make you feel better. Also, sleep. But, I always asked, how are you suppose to motivate yourself to do these things when you would rather not do anything (or in some cases, not even be here)? Without going into my struggle with depression too much, I DID finally realize that I was tired of hearing ideas/criticisms from others, and I had to figure out how to make it on my own. I'm not recommending staying away from meds and doctors... this would not be responsible advice... but that's what I did for myself. Then again, I am diagnosed with Dysthymia, and felt as though my unique fight with this disorder could handle it. I'm not sure what you or others here are dealing with.
So how did I finally get motivated? I was able to see my body slowly turning into a round mess. Stretch marks, stomach pains, not fitting into clothes anymore, etc. It's not pretty- and neither is depression.
Try to remember what you really like to do. What's your passion? If you aren't passionate about one now, are you interested in finding one? I used photography - and was able to capture my feelings through the camera lens. I also love music and listen to it all the time.
I hope you are able to find the motivation you need. There is a nasty stigma that goes along with depression... don't let others undermine your issues, but know that you CAN overcome them, once YOU decide how.0 -
Has anyone found that as they've lowered their carbs, their mood has lowered too? I have to remind myself that my body along with my serotonin levels are all adjusting. The older I get the more and more I believe that mental and physical health have more and more to do with staying hydrated and eating balanced meals. Maybe some of us are more sensitive to bad eating and dehydration than others??
:drinker:0 -
I wish that I could give you and myself the magic solution. I have dealt with depression and anxiety for as long as I can remember. When I started to loose weight in November 2013 it was due to a medical test result that scared me. Loosing a little bit of weight was the key.
I started with trying to just eat better one meal a day. And then after a few days try for a second meal. Or even just start with your snacks. Log everything, it helps you say tuned in. I didn't exercise at all until I had lost 30 pounds. It took me that long to begin feeling better. Even then it was agony to push myself to do a mile on the treadmill. Encourage yourself with small goals. If you are walking for five minutes push yourself to do an extra five minutes and so on.
When you are exercising listen to music or for me its a book on tape, that relaxes you. If you can tune the rest of the world out for 30 minutes or so it helps a lot. Also, Yoga is very relaxing. Even if you cant do all of the moves at first do what you can; the DVD's normally have relaxing music playing and then at the end there is a quiet mediation period.
The whole experience is relaxing in itself.
Good luck and remember you can do it 0 -
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running
not a depression success story, but it's funny, it's truth, and maybe it'll make you smile a bit.
At your suggestion, I just read this. I read Oatmeal comics anyway, but this was brilliant.
It has made my day, my week and even my year. Love it!
This made my day. I need this today more that the air passing threw my lungs. Thanks.0 -
I've had depression for years and years and I'm on medication. But as much as I hate to admit it, because it seems so obvious now, exercise really does help. I'd read that for years, but I never thought I had enough energy to do more than a 10-15 minute walk. I'd feel maybe a little better, but nothing to write home about.
Then a couple of months ago I read about the 30 Day Shred on these forums, so I figured what the heck. I did it to lose weight...not to treat my depression. The first day sucked. Really, really sucked. I thought I was going to die, and I practically had to crawl up the stairs that night. But the next day I did it again, and it sucked ever so slightly less. The third day after the nearly 45 minutes it took to recover from Jillian's sadism, I discovered something...I was happy. Not just not depressed, but really happy. It lasted all evening. The next day, even though I didn't feel like it, I did it again. And again I was happy afterwards.
So what I discovered is that what helps for me is strenuous exercise...a stroll through the park helps a little bit, but not like one of Jillian's videos or like running (which I've also started doing). I figure it's a combination of physical...the body's own endorphins that are released as a result of stress and pain; and also psychological. I feel really proud of myself for doing something hard.0 -
LOL!!! I CAN!! And I do!I can not cry and run at the same time !
I also try to listen rather then talk.
and prayer !
Exercise DEFINITELY reduces depression dramatically, and NOT exercising increases it dramatically.
Wrestling with God in prayer, while power walking, absolutely!!!0 -
I suffer from severe clinical depression. It comes in waves...and some of those waves are so strong that they literally knock me down for weeks. It's exhausting, frustrating, maddening, and...well...depressing. I, too, agree 100% with those that stated that poor diet and lack of exercise makes depression so much worse. Much of my depression is so deeply rooted in my lack of self-worth and low self-esteem (but that's a topic for my therapist!). And what makes it difficult is that, for me, it's all a very vicious cycle. My low self-esteem leads to depression, depression leads to inactivity, inactivity leads to over-eating (which I ALWAYS do when I'm bored/depressed), over-eating leads to shame, and that shame leads to lower self-esteem, which leads to worsening depression...and so on and so on. I have found that the only thing that breaks my chain of depression is eating healthier and exercising. It's not easy, by any means. Some days, I truly don't even think I can muster the strength to get out of bed. But I do. And I'm TRYING to force myself into habits...healthier habits. I'm a work in progress, as we ALL are. I'm not perfect. I make mistakes. I slip into old (bad) habits. And I don't always succeed at what I put my mind to. But I'm also human. And I'm learning to go a little easier on myself and NOT buy into the things that I have been taught to believe about myself (that I'm no good, that I'm not worthy of love, that I'm a loser, that I'm never going to amount to anything, etc). We are ALL beautiful people, and we are ALL just trying to be a little bit better. That's why we're here, isn't it? I find that I am much more successful when I set small, realistic goals. I don't have to run a marathon tomorrow or lose all of my weight in a week. I certainly didn't gain my weight (or bad habits) in a week! So if you're suffering from severe depression, as I do, it might serve you well to set small goals, and celebrate EVERY SINGLE VICTORY...even if it's just one pound. The mere fact that you are here, that you are trying to make changes, and that you are reaching out is a HUGE step...and one that you should definitely celebrate...just not with an entire chocolate cake! Good luck to all...and continue to stay positive. You will have set-backs. That's life. It's how you handle those set-backs that make the difference! Cheers! 0
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Do to a recent find in my depression history, I am hoping to shake it in the next couple of weeks but my motivation for working out and eating healthy is zilch to none. All I want to do is eat junk and sit on my *kitten*. I dread my work outs and then the only reason I am doing them is because I know I get to eat more. Its unhealthy, this circle of self destruction and I was hoping for some success stories that involve depression and over coming it. I am so tired of being the chubby one...
I have SO been there! I HATE exercising, and when I'm depressed, I can't get off my butt either. I'm now on buproprion (Welbutrin) and forcing myself to walk for my exercise. I take my audio book with me so that I'm not thinking about the stupid exercise. Eventually, the endorphins kick in and my misery subsides. You might like to try an audio book for distraction, and pick a form of exercise you can tolerate. Best wishes!0 -
LOL!!! I CAN!! And I do!I can not cry and run at the same time !
I also try to listen rather then talk.
and prayer !
Exercise DEFINITELY reduces depression dramatically, and NOT exercising increases it dramatically.
Wrestling with God in prayer, while power walking, absolutely!!!
Love the "wrestling with God in prayer" statement! I'm not spiritual, though, so I wrestle with my boss while walking You can't imagine the mean things I do to him when I'm walking! 0 -
Really, I just had to be firm with myself. Just told myself to get up and go for a run. There's no easy way around it.0
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I have found that eating poorly and not exercising make my depression much worse.
Agree 100% with the above. When I don't exercise for more than a week I get incredibly depressed. I went through a 2-year bout of depression and the only thing that pulled me out was forcing myself to work out on a regular basis. I still experience it from time to time, but it's MUCH more manageable when exercising daily.
I'm finding it really hard to even find the motivation to start exercising. I'm lethargic and in a serious state of self pity, i hate myself but I really just cant find the will to change myself.0 -
this is one of my favorite quotes. it's in my profile, so i can read it when i need to. i'm not a very spiritual person, but i like the message behind it.Something in the universe loves me. Something in the universe loves the entity that is me. I would choose to call this something "God", a singular spark that dwells in the soul of every living being. If you look inside yourself you will find that spark too. You will. But you have to look deep. Love your faults. Embrace them. If God embraces them, then how can they be faults? Love yourself. You have to love yourself. If we don't love ourselves, how can we love others? And when we know what we are, then we can find the truth out about others, seek what they are; the truth about them. And you know what the truth is? The truth about them? About you? About me? Do you? The truth is, we're all perfect. Just as we are. God only loves that which is perfect and he loves you. He loves you because you are perfect. You are perfect. Just as you are.
yes, it is from a sci-fi show. i don't care. don't confuse the message with the messenger.0 -
I had this epiphany that I felt less depressed/guilty when I was being productive while lying around trying to make it through the next hour -- ie, if the dishwasher or washing machine was running.
Then I realized if I stuck to my calorie intake, I WOULD be productive while lying around -- always. The weight would creep off slowly. That gave me a little glimmer of hope.
Realize that you don't have to push yourself and go crazy with exercising right away. If all you can do is make it through the day, just make it through the day while sticking to your calorie goal. It's one small responsibility you can handle. his helps.. it's the only way I get by! Add me if you need support!
This. You need to take control. Start chalking up the little victories so that you can see that YOU ARE WORTH FIGHTING FOR. You DO matter.
I know it feels like your whole body is filled with sand and you can't face cleaning your teeth let alone working out, but you have it in you to put your shoes on and go for a walk today. Then do it tomorrow, and then the next day. Once you start getting that sense of control back, your depression will begin to lift.
Depression is an illness and you need to learn your coping mechanisms. It's different for everyone, but a common thread in depression is feeling a lack of control over your life. So start taking control with baby steps. Make "KAIZEN!" your new mantra:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kaizen
And good luck. You're not alone.
Edit: I want to give you a little example of how I dragged myself up out of a 2 year long depressive episode. It was so bad at one point that I would go to bed crying and pray to not wake up. There were lots of reasons for it, and I (just) managed to keep my job, but everything else in my life completely collapsed.
So, one day, I was on the sofa watching telly, on yet another "sick" day, eating crap because I couldn't face cooking and was still in my pyjamas at 2pm. I looked around the living room, which was a complete state. I told myself that I would get up in the next ad break and do housework as long as the ad break was on (like, 3 minutes?). I did it and I felt so good about it that I did it again. And again. And again. But that's all I did that day. I watched telly (still eating crap) and did housework in the ad breaks. By the time I went to bed that day, I'd cleaned the whole house.
It was the beginning for me. Many, many years later, I now recognized I had depression, have learned to recognize the signs and have learned to deal with it. I've since married, quit my boring *kitten* job and started my own business.
And all because, one day, I took baby steps. I did what I could cope with and built from there.0 -
Something in the universe loves me. Something in the universe loves the entity that is me. I would choose to call this something "God", a singular spark that dwells in the soul of every living being. If you look inside yourself you will find that spark too. You will. But you have to look deep. Love your faults. Embrace them. If God embraces them, then how can they be faults? Love yourself. You have to love yourself. If we don't love ourselves, how can we love others? And when we know what we are, then we can find the truth out about others, seek what they are; the truth about them. And you know what the truth is? The truth about them? About you? About me? Do you? The truth is, we're all perfect. Just as we are. God only loves that which is perfect and he loves you. He loves you because you are perfect. You are perfect. Just as you are.
like^^0 -
Really, I just had to be firm with myself. Just told myself to get up and go for a run. There's no easy way around it.
Yup! I have found, that if I just tell myself that I can't go threw the rest of the day without working out, then I get up and do it. It is helping, and a lot of my depression is leaving now that I am no longer having an allergic reaction to a copper iud. I am feeling much better. Thanks for everyones support.0
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