Mom can't be supportive (have a normal mom, don't read)

My mother is very supportive most of the time. However, she gets it in her mind to tell me the "truth" of things. It used to be "you have to do this for the rest of your life" which is fine now because I found something that works for me that I can do forever, but when I was trying WW with her (which wasn't working out) it was unpleasant to hear.

The current unpleasant thing she likes to tell me is that my body is just going to stop losing weight at some point, and I won't be able to lose anymore. I get annoyed because she implies that this is going to be before my goal weight. I get frustrated because I know she says it because she's stuck at 153-155 even though she wants to be at 145.

I didn't have that with my mom...but i did with my mother in law. When I was actively trying to lose weight she would purposely buy clothing that was three times my size for Christmas or for my birthday.

The current unpleasant thing she likes to tell me is that my body is just going to stop losing weight at some point, and I won't be able to lose anymore. I get annoyed because she implies that this is going to be before my goal weight. I get frustrated because I know she says it because she's stuck at 153-155 even though she wants to be at 145.

Not necessarily the truth at all. Metabolic adaptation does happen, but it's generally seen in people who've done a very low calorie diet and tons of cardio who don't have much muscle. Even if it DOES happen, it can be dealt with. Best thing to do is not try to go on an extreme deficit right from the beginning, and do strength training along with your cardio. Good luck.

We must be sisters separated at birth... LOL

Now that I don't live with her I can laugh at it. (I lived with her for 5 years after my divorce - it definitely left its mark). The other day she said I was obsessed with going to be the YMCA. I told her "if I was obsessed I wouldn't be a size 16, I would be a size 8". Oh - your always at the Y. No... I'm lucky if I get there 3-4 times a week. Oh and it goes on. You are not alone. Try to find support elsewhere because she is not going to change (if she's like my mother).

CONGRATULATIONS ON THE WEIGHT LOSS!!! :flowerforyou:

<raises hand> OOOH, ME! ME!

I'm incredibly hesitant to share this much personal stuff, but here goes.

Yah. I tried to keep it all to myself until I got caught. My parents *try* to be supportive but often fail. One's an enabler, but will often try to guilt or belittle: "are you still doing your little food thing?" with a infuriatingly condescending grin, the next day will be: "how do you feel after doing this?" My answer, of course, is that I feel much better in general now that I'm learning to eat and cook, which elicited a very disappointed sigh. One's a manic depressive, so don't even get me started. Caught me running and then I got made fun of and told how I wasn't doing it right, or hard enough, or long enough, et cetera. Of course, I wanted to say, "well, show me, then!" and keep running, knowing full well they'd never keep up, but that would have brought on the angry and hostile part of the cycle.

And guess who lives at home now because they need a caretaker these days?

I have no magic advice, other than to rely more on your friends here. I have to fight depression being treated like that all the time. But, hey, running helps, lol.

So I guess the answer is: NO, you're not alone.

My mum is dead and has been for 21 years but I remember she always tried to be supportive, unlike my father (also dead, 30 years), who was one of the most negative people I can remember.

Sadly, much of his negativity has rubbed off on my sister. I saw her in June for the first time in 8 months, during which time I have lost a fair bit of weight. What did she say? Something nice and encouraging or congratulatory? Nope. She said "Can't see which ankle you lost it off".

Now, if she had said it in a joking kind of voice and with a smile on her face, then I would have know she was teasing but she didn't - it was said in a vicious tone of voice, with a snort and a malicious look on her face. I was SO angry I could have hit her but had enough self-control not to do so.

Wouldn't have been so bad except that she has type 2 diabetes and doesn't control it well. She's overweight (well obese, on the BMI scale) and is constantly being told to lose weight but she doesn't do anything about it - and she wonders why people get cross with her.

You have no idea how glad I am that she lives 400 miles away....!

My mom is supportive it is other family members I have this issue with.
My sister, who is over weight tells me i'm getting too small and my sister in law who used to be smaller than me will not even talk about weight loss, food, exercise or my weight loss because she is jealous (she is that type of girl, that likes to have all the attention and focus on her) My husband bought me a treadmill and my MIL actually told the rest of the family that she wished I would "Go ahead and weigh only 2 pounds so she could stop hearing about my weight loss" when I hadn't even been the one talking to her about it.
Luckily my mom and husband have been supportive and my mom is always telling me how good i'm looking lol it's weird.

and growing up would say I need to look more like a certain skinny friend

That one's hard. I've been the skinny friend in this scenario, and it made me feel terrible. Can't imagine how it makes you feel.

Nope, mine's not normal. She has HUGE issues with food (warped and unhealthy), and lovingly passed those onto me by making food and my weight a gigantic issue my whole life, no pun intended. I vowed I would not do that to my kid (s). I have found myself thinking that I never want to have a little girl because the world is so bad for women (in relation to body image, etc.). My mom didn't do it to me on purpose but she gave me a complex that affected my entire life. Yes, I'm in therapy....LOL

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