Master Cleanse???

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Replies

  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Beware suggesting alternatives. My epic tapeworm thread got deleted.
  • pcastagner
    pcastagner Posts: 1,606 Member
    Don't mean to derail...but does anyone know a good doctor that will bleed you when you need it?

    The evil humors are building up in my body again and I just can't find a proper doctor anymore.

    Hmmm... Sounds like your yellow bile, water, and blood are not in balance with your black bile.

    Bleeding should be very thorough
  • mustgetmuscles1
    mustgetmuscles1 Posts: 3,348 Member
    Beware suggesting alternatives. My epic tapeworm thread got deleted.

    How about sweat lodges? Think that would count?
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Drinking water cleanses the body. Drinking water is healthy.

    You can tell someone they are being unhealthy in a NICE way without belittling them. Some people are just genuinely uniformed or misinformed and you can inform them without making them feel stupid.

    You don't need to be a jerk and make others feel unintelligent or inferior to get your point across.

    Well, then you get a bunch of people being nice saying, yeah, I did it, it was great. And a bunch of people being nice saying, it's not healthy, don't do it. And the person is undecided because they might get 50/50 response and still not be convinced that it is really bad. Being abrupt about it and saying HECK NO, that deters more people saying they did it and it was great, so therefore, less convincing anecdotal evidence for the unhealthy side, and more likely the person will get the point quite quickly that it's a bad idea. We're doing them a favor doing it this way, by saving them time and uncertainty.

    I'd like to point out that, if this actually ever happened on this site, the moderators would delete the thread as being supportive of unhealthy weightloss.
  • ChiManLifts
    ChiManLifts Posts: 97
    Everyone is going to rip my head off for this one....

    Ive done it a few times and LOVED it. I think Ive done it 3 times in the past few years (10 days max each), and Ive never looked at it as a weight loss thing. I love the way it makes me feel and I always have better results from losing weight afterwards. Im not saying its a good idea, or it will magically make you drop pounds...Im just saying what my experience is from it.

    Age 21.... Nuff said.

    Since when is being young a suitable explanation for idiocy?
  • bumblebums
    bumblebums Posts: 2,182 Member
    Don't mean to derail...but does anyone know a good doctor that will bleed you when you need it?

    The evil humors are building up in my body again and I just can't find a proper doctor anymore.

    Dr. Oz might be up to it.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Everyone is going to rip my head off for this one....

    Ive done it a few times and LOVED it. I think Ive done it 3 times in the past few years (10 days max each), and Ive never looked at it as a weight loss thing. I love the way it makes me feel and I always have better results from losing weight afterwards. Im not saying its a good idea, or it will magically make you drop pounds...Im just saying what my experience is from it.

    Age 21.... Nuff said.

    Since when is being young a suitable explanation for idiocy?

    Forever?
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,145 Member
    in...for the cleanse...
  • MaryJane_8810002
    MaryJane_8810002 Posts: 2,082 Member
    Did it a few times. Longest was 19 days.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,145 Member
    Sorry but you're not going to find supporters of any sort of cleanse/detox/flush/water fast on MFP. Anyone who tries to extol the virtues of the aforementioned plans usually gets ridiculed. Just a heads up.

    please explain the virtues of said cleanse, as opposed to the natural cleansing process our body goes through...

    OP - unless you have stopped pooping, urinating, sweating, etc...then you are already cleansing yourself daily ...
  • mustgetmuscles1
    mustgetmuscles1 Posts: 3,348 Member
    Don't mean to derail...but does anyone know a good doctor that will bleed you when you need it?

    The evil humors are building up in my body again and I just can't find a proper doctor anymore.

    Dr. Oz might be up to it.
    Doctor. LOL
    http://youtu.be/Ra5iXI_WCu0
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,145 Member
    why is it called master cleanse? Is there an amateur cleanse too???
  • MercuryBlue
    MercuryBlue Posts: 886 Member
    why is it called master cleanse? Is there an amateur cleanse too???

    That's what you get when you use grade D maple syrup instead. With store-bought lemon juice and dollar store cayenne.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,145 Member
    why is it called master cleanse? Is there an amateur cleanse too???

    That's what you get when you use grade D maple syrup instead. With store-bought lemon juice and dollar store cayenne.

    so its an amateur cleanse if you just do it with ketones?
  • MercuryBlue
    MercuryBlue Posts: 886 Member
    why is it called master cleanse? Is there an amateur cleanse too???

    That's what you get when you use grade D maple syrup instead. With store-bought lemon juice and dollar store cayenne.

    so its an amateur cleanse if you just do it with ketones?

    It's an amateur cleanse if you're not getting paid. Once you get signed, you move up to the pro cleanse. The master cleanse comes next.
  • ashleyisgreat
    ashleyisgreat Posts: 586 Member
    This thread has quickly taken a turn toward AWESOME.
  • FearAnLoathingJ
    FearAnLoathingJ Posts: 337 Member
    I do cleanse but I just use a bar of soap, make sure you wet it first or it's hard to get in.

    This house is very very clean
  • icecreamdreams
    icecreamdreams Posts: 17 Member
    I tried the master cleanse about 3/4 years ago. I'll admit, I was looking for a quick way to shed pounds and I had a lot of will power. I was not able to stand the lemonade mixture (it's disgusting), so I only forced myself to drink a couple glasses during the entire 10 days. I did a couple of salt water flushes, but I mainly just drank water for 10 days.

    The ups: I lost 25 lbs. I was an avid lover (addict) of salt, and no longer felt the need to use it.

    The downs: The weight came back within a few weeks.

    Was it worth it, maybe for the salt consumption. Would I ever do it again or recommend it to anyone else? No.
  • blt0087
    blt0087 Posts: 115
    I did it once in high school and it was awful. Sure..I got used to the drink and lost a few pounds, but I was constantly running to the bathroom (which in itself was a HORRIBLE experience anytime I went. Imagine eating nothing but spicy spicy Mexican food for a week and having to use the restroom 4 to 5 times a day...you get the picture.) I was weak and tired, I constantly had the shakes, and every bit of weight I lost, I gained it back and more in less than a month.

    So no, no, no. I don't recommend it to anyone.
  • herblackwings39
    herblackwings39 Posts: 3,926 Member
    Try leeches. Much better for cleansing the body of evil.
    This is unnecessary sarcasm. The OP was simply asking for advice. Just say "no, its not a good idea". Or don't post. Posts like this make me not even want to use MFP

    How do we really know if sarcasm is necessary or not? Is there a formula or rule or something?

    Sarcasm is my favorite food group!

    Cheese is mine.

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