Help Pls - Need Some suggestions

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amymina
amymina Posts: 64 Member
in Motivation and Support
I have actively used mfp since late last year. Starting in Sept 2012, I started eating healthy, in oct, my husband and I joined a gym. Within eight months, I lost 80 lbs, from 300 to around 220, give or take a few in each direction. Since then I have had some trouble. We have some incredible stressors in our lives, and my reaction to stress is always to eat, always has been. We are having financial problems and having to move from our home due to them. My mildly autistic son was bullied so badly near the end of the school year, and the school did nothing. What mad it even worse was near the end of the year we were worried about him injuring himself and didn't allow him to attend the last few days of school. As I sit writing this, my house is half packed all around me and we are moving from a 3 bdrm home to a 2 bdrm mobile home in two weeks, and we are not ready. My oldest son who had all of the problem in the school is going to be staying with my mom during the night and getting off the bus at our home in the evenings. The other two kids are staying full time with us. We are trying to give him a little more freedom and one on one attention that he can't get with two other kids at home. So, I have a few days where I am okay, and then I will binge. Some kind of dessert, pizza, etc. I know I am not the only one to go through this, and thankfully, I am still active enough at my job and have good enough days I haven't gained the weight back. Once we move, I will no longer be able just to run down the street if I want a dessert. We are moving to a very rural area with a great reputation in the school, so I am praying for better treatment for our 12 year old son.

So, long story short, now that you know some of the details, is how to people deal with this? When you feel powerless and your life is taking a turn that you never thought, and you have to give up a lot for your children to try to keep them safe from the bullies and the school system that preferred to sweep him under the carpet, and you have no desire to work out, what do you do that is better for you? just needed some suggestions, maybe a list. This website is a community and I appreciate all that has been done!! Thanks guys!

Replies

  • xjoseyx
    xjoseyx Posts: 74
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    Wow Im sorry for everything thats going on for you right now. Im glad youre getting your son into a better school. I was bullied as a teen to the brink of suicide so I know how rough it can be.

    Try to keep i mind all the positives in your life. Your kids. Husband. Your amazing weightloss so far! Stay as positive as you can. Everything will settle back down and so will the emotional rollercoaster youre on. :smile:
  • jilly1130
    jilly1130 Posts: 52 Member
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    You definitely have a tremendous amount of stressors in your life right now. Moving on its own is majorly stressful and when you add in the other things that are happening I can see where it would be really hard to focus on your weight loss.

    I, like you, react to the challenges in my life by eating and I am working so hard to address this and to have a more healthy relationship with food. I find, that especially when I am stressed out, I try to look at my day as just today. I focus on the next 24 hours and how I will eat right and get in some form of exercise. Just focus on today. Don't look too far ahead and for me, right now, I can't look at tomorrow because it is too overwhelming.

    The other thing that is really important is to exercise especially when every other aspect of our lives are so out of control or stressful. When I am having those challenging days I really really focus on getting myself to the gym because I know I will feel so much better physically but most importantly mentally.

    You want to celebrate the success you have had so far and the last thing you want to do is go backwards. You have lost so much weight! 80 lbs is an amazing accomplishment. Don't let anything this world is throwing at you make you forget all of your hard work you put in to make it this far....you don't want to start over. Just hang in there and I wish you all of the best.
  • amymina
    amymina Posts: 64 Member
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    Thanks guys, I also have problems with suicidal tendencies in high school, and I want better for my son. Its a tough age without kids harassing you and teachers ignoring it. Pretty soon we will have moved and will work on getting back on track and just be careful. Can't wait for it to be over!
  • ssmithbowman
    ssmithbowman Posts: 23
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    Hi,

    I'm glad ti will be a better situation for your son. It is also very helpful not having fast food or other junk food places around; I find that I have a lot of self control at the grocery store but not as much at restaurants or when I'm at work and someone brings something in (partially because it's free).

    As far as avoiding binging though, You just have to find some other type of coping mechanism that works for you. That's all your binging is - a coping mechanism, just not a healthy one. Some people meditate, others go on a calming walk. You can play candy crush for all I care - just find something that is not food related that works. The problem with habits is you can't delete a habit - your brain doesn't wor kthat way. The only way you can change is to replace it with something else so your brain can form a completely new pathway. IT takes approximately 21 days to form a new habit. You can do it!

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