Help! Confused and Frustrated- seeking public opinion

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Dorothy4208
Dorothy4208 Posts: 53 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Me, today- 5'2", 5'3" when I stand up nice and straight, roughly 186 lbs and size 10 jeans (they're snug).

So, it's been a little over a week since I joined MFP, and I am so confused. I went to the IIFYM calculator, which someone suggested, and my TDEE (with little or no exercise) is 1787. It says for aggressive fat loss I should be eating 1488 calories a day. I do Pilates on a reformer twice a week, without fail, 50 mins per class. Gymnastics once a week (which, even when I eat dinner 1-2 hrs before, I am downright ravenous afterwards) and I like to rollerblade or take a nice walk (street or treadmill) once in a while. So. I just don't think 1200 calories, which is what MFP has me on, is realistic, according to all the threads I've read. At 1200 calories I feel hungry all the time.
But I also feel like since I quit smoking (11 mos ago) my body has just been completely dumbfounded as far as how to proceed. Prior to quitting I was getting fit and losing weight, and since I quit... nothing. I gained about 15 pounds and the scale hasn't moved at all since. I lost two or three pounds this week, but there have been slight fluctuations day to day. I want to be aggressive, because my brother is getting married on October 14th and those pictures will be around forever. But I am not a happy camper when I'm hungry. Oh.. and I LOVE chocolate.
One more thing... MFP says 50 mins (my class length) of Pilates burns 178 calories... I think it's more.
I just wanted to see what kind of general suggestions I may get. I feel very frustrated. I do get that two pounds a week is not bad, but I'm concerned about what this week will bring.
I upped my calories to 1400 and that leaves me room for dessert tonight, which makes me happy. Maybe I just need motivation and support? Not sure which thread to post this in. I don't know.

By the way, I really love this site in general and think you're all (mostly) pretty damn awesome :wink:
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Replies

  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
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    1) Lower your expectations
    2) You didn't put the weight on in a few days, it won't come off in a few days.
    3) Get rid of the "hangry". Calculate your TDEE-20% and eat at that religiously and faithfully. Go here and follow the steps: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/912920-in-place-of-a-road-map-3-2013
    4) Invest in a food scale and a heart rate monitor. They're worth every penny.

    It's fine to want to be aggressive, but this isn't a "quick fix", it's a lifestyle. It's not a sprint, it's a marathon.
    That's pretty much all of the advice I can give, good luck!
  • QuilterInVA
    QuilterInVA Posts: 672 Member
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    Yoga and Pilates do not burn very many calories. They are for stretching and flexibility. I do both. Everything you are doing is cardio and you need to add strength training twice a week to preserve lean body mass. Cardio can't do that. You also eat back your exercise calories. When you enter them on the summary for your food journal the 3rd line that should exercise included is what you should be eating. As for the hunger - protein satisfies the longest followed by fat with carbs a poor last place. Carbs leave you hungy and tired in an hour. Up the protein and eat mainly complex carbs.
  • QuilterInVA
    QuilterInVA Posts: 672 Member
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    Forgot to add I wear a Body Media Core all day, except when I am showering or doing water aerobics. That's how I know the calories for pilates and yoga are low. Most people overestimate their exercise calories.
  • fivethreeone
    fivethreeone Posts: 8,196 Member
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    Yoga and Pilates do not burn very many calories. They are for stretching and flexibility. I do both. Everything you are doing is cardio and you need to add strength training twice a week to preserve lean body mass. Cardio can't do that. You also eat back your exercise calories. When you enter them on the summary for your food journal the 3rd line that should exercise included is what you should be eating. As for the hunger - protein satisfies the longest followed by fat with carbs a poor last place. Carbs leave you hungy and tired in an hour. Up the protein and eat mainly complex carbs.

    This.

    Additionally, 2-3 lb per day water weight fluctuations are completely normal. If you weigh yourself daily you will soon see that the scale shifts all the time, but the overall monthly trend will be downward.

    Just relax and trust the process. It works.
  • lauramacaroni
    lauramacaroni Posts: 25 Member
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    1) Lower your expectations
    2) You didn't put the weight on in a few days, it won't come off in a few days.
    3) Get rid of the "hangry". Calculate your TDEE-20% and eat at that religiously and faithfully. Go here and follow the steps: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/912920-in-place-of-a-road-map-3-2013
    4) Invest in a food scale and a heart rate monitor. They're worth every penny.

    It's fine to want to be aggressive, but this isn't a "quick fix", it's a lifestyle. It's not a sprint, it's a marathon.
    That's pretty much all of the advice I can give, good luck!

    This exactly. It's what I did as well....it took a year to lose the weight, but it was well worth it. I also followed "in place of a road map" and found it to be easy to understand & it made great sense to follow.

    Good luck to you.

    *Edit for typos.
  • wannabpiper
    wannabpiper Posts: 402 Member
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    1) Lower your expectations
    2) You didn't put the weight on in a few days, it won't come off in a few days.
    3) Get rid of the "hangry". Calculate your TDEE-20% and eat at that religiously and faithfully. Go here and follow the steps: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/912920-in-place-of-a-road-map-3-2013
    4) Invest in a food scale and a heart rate monitor. They're worth every penny.

    It's fine to want to be aggressive, but this isn't a "quick fix", it's a lifestyle. It's not a sprint, it's a marathon.
    That's pretty much all of the advice I can give, good luck!

    Well said. This is something new to me and I'm doing so much better by keeping this philosophy in mind - daily. I don't care if I lose a quarter of a pound a week as long as I'm averaging downward and not upward on that scale. And it's not a diet - it's a lifestyle. Diets don't last - but changing my lifestyle will. Thank you!
  • Factory_Reset
    Factory_Reset Posts: 1,651 Member
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    This blog post was written by MFP's Most Supportive member.

    Read it.

    All of it.

    It should help.

    Your welcome OP



    Day 1: THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER!! I'm gonna make it happen this time!!! Vacation is in 7 weeks and I want to look hot and amaze everyone. I've got this!! YAY!!

    Day 2: Friend me for motivation!!! I'd love to have more moms that are 5'4" and in their 30s that can do this with me. Let's do this everyone!

    Day 3: Who wants to do some Jillian Michaels with me?!?! I saw a friend on Instagram mention it and she looks amazing.

    Day 4: I think I lost two pounds SUCCESS STORY PARTY!

    Day 5: I'm super cranky but I can't eat my 1200 calories anymore, not even in cake, because sugar.

    Days 6-10: HALP, IT'S A PLATEAU!!!!!! I've been sticking with this program for a week and only lost two pounds.

    Day 11: Lost half a pound guise, so good to break that plateau!

    Day 12: I hate Jillian Michaels. No workout today. Felt bad because no workout, binged on two apples. Guilt consumes me. Am I the only one?

    Day 15: Trying this TDEE thing! Love all the extra calories! I'm going to eat an extra South Beach diet bar today.

    Day 16: Up half a pound again, TDEE is bogus.

    Day 17: How about a cleanse? My insides feel cleaner already! Can you believe that the human body has 7 pounds of poop in it? Which cleanse worked best for you? Can I do these every week?

    Day 21: Went to dinner with a friend. I ordered fish and a light salad but she ordered cheese sticks for appetizers and only ate one so I had to eat the other six. Sabotage, right? She is jealous and wants me to stay fat.

    Day 22: I want to eat all the foods, hold me back! Can you exercise during TOM?! Is this extra weight water or is it the cheese sticks from last night? What's everyone's favorite chocolate? Wait, don't tell me. Someone who is not me might see it and be tempted.

    Day 23:

    Day 24:

    Day 25: User has not logged in for three days, she may need some encouragement

    Day 27: ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR ME AT ALL? No, not that one.

    Day 30: Maybe next year will be my year.

    (special thanks to _waffle_ and capt_apollo and dopeitup, who gave me suggestions, some of them without realizing it.)
  • Ang108
    Ang108 Posts: 1,711 Member
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    I think you need to decide if you want dessert tonight, or nice wedding pictures in October. I don't think you can have both. Decide and proceed accordingly........:o).
  • MelStren
    MelStren Posts: 457 Member
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    bump
  • marciebrian
    marciebrian Posts: 853 Member
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    First let me congratulate you for quitting smoking. Best thing in the world you could do for your health. period. I smoked for many years and quit almost 5 years ago now. I retained fluids for quite a while, (not sure 11 months but a while) drink lots of water. Whichever calorie reduction method you select i.e. 1200 cal/TDEE - 20% pick one that works for you. Eat back your exercise calories and invest in a good food scale and HRM to track your food and calories burned.

    Good luck and if you want support and I can help, add me to your friends list.:wink:
  • dianefisher47
    dianefisher47 Posts: 234 Member
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    Me, today- 5'2", 5'3" when I stand up nice and straight, roughly 186 lbs and size 10 jeans (they're snug).
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
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    I copied this from here. http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/819055-setting-your-calorie-and-macro-targets

    As a rule of thumb, the following weekly targets would give a balance between minimizing these negative side effects and seeing a reasonable weekly weight loss:
    More than 75 lbs: 2 lbs/week
    40-75 lbs: 1.5 lbs/week
    10-40 lbs: 1 lb/week
    Less than 10 lbs: 0.5 lb/week

    This is a great post to learn how to fit in treats. http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/925464-fitting-it-in-giggity

    I hope this helps. Congratulations on quitting smoking!!! :flowerforyou:
  • Dorothy4208
    Dorothy4208 Posts: 53 Member
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    Thanks, everyone for the advice. I am still confused a little, I read some things about the TDEE but still wondering how does it differentiate between a 150lb person who is mostly muscle and a 150lb person who is mostly fat? Won't they have different TDEE? Also, are macros more important than calories? And someone said somewhere that all my stuff is cardio? Really? I really thought PIlates was strength, especially since it's on the reformer.
  • dianefisher47
    dianefisher47 Posts: 234 Member
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    Just wondering...how can you weigh 186 and fit into a size 10...I am the same height and same weight and I fit into 16 and they can be snug and some makes more comfortable in 18......just wondering
  • wild_wild_life
    wild_wild_life Posts: 1,334 Member
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    Thanks, everyone for the advice. I am still confused a little, I read some things about the TDEE but still wondering how does it differentiate between a 150lb person who is mostly muscle and a 150lb person who is mostly fat? Won't they have different TDEE? Also, are macros more important than calories? And someone said somewhere that all my stuff is cardio? Really? I really thought PIlates was strength, especially since it's on the reformer.

    TDEE is an estimate. It's just a starting place.

    People vary on their opinion of the importance of macros. With a little sniffing around here you will find lots of recommendations. The default protein setting is low, treat it as a minimum. Some people find lower carbs help with satiety.

    Just wanted to mention, MFP would have set you at 1200 as a baseline before exercise, so any of the workouts earn you more calories (as reflected in your changing goal), which you should eat. That would put you closer to the 1400-1500 recommended by the TDEE site. If you eat your exercise cals, the MFP way and the TDEE way workout to be the same.
  • Dorothy4208
    Dorothy4208 Posts: 53 Member
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    @Diane Fisher... my thoughts exactly. I'm not that big, but I am a little flabby. And I made a mistake. the jeans I'm wearing now are an 8 Medium, Lee Relaxed Fit, At The Waist. They are definitely snug, though. I will post pics if I can figure it out, but I've been a little shy about that. I do have some muscle but... I don't know. Someone said I need more strength training. How do I do that? Is that what's missing? I don't know!
  • Dorothy4208
    Dorothy4208 Posts: 53 Member
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    Umm, tried to look in "help," cannot figure out how to post a photo. It may just be me.
  • Dorothy4208
    Dorothy4208 Posts: 53 Member
    Options
    Thanks, everyone for the advice. I am still confused a little, I read some things about the TDEE but still wondering how does it differentiate between a 150lb person who is mostly muscle and a 150lb person who is mostly fat? Won't they have different TDEE? Also, are macros more important than calories? And someone said somewhere that all my stuff is cardio? Really? I really thought PIlates was strength, especially since it's on the reformer.

    TDEE is an estimate. It's just a starting place.

    People vary on their opinion of the importance of macros. With a little sniffing around here you will find lots of recommendations. The default protein setting is low, treat it as a minimum. Some people find lower carbs help with satiety.

    Just wanted to mention, MFP would have set you at 1200 as a baseline before exercise, so any of the workouts earn you more calories (as reflected in your changing goal), which you should eat. That would put you closer to the 1400-1500 recommended by the TDEE site. If you eat your exercise cals, the MFP way and the TDEE way workout to be the same.

    That makes a lot of sense, if I were exercising every day (which I don't always). Thanks!
  • I_Will_End_You
    I_Will_End_You Posts: 4,397 Member
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    Umm, tried to look in "help," cannot figure out how to post a photo. It may just be me.


    First copy the link to your photo. Then come here, paste the link to your post, and type [ img ] link to your picture [/img ] around the link, minus the spaces before and after the brackets.
  • herblackwings39
    herblackwings39 Posts: 3,930 Member
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    Umm, tried to look in "help," cannot figure out how to post a photo. It may just be me.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/540392-posting-pictures-on-the-boards-tutorial

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