My family doesn't think I can do this

AmandaAnne307
AmandaAnne307 Posts: 113 Member
in Motivation and Support
I was talking to my sister the other day and we decided to go to a concert together in mid-October. I said that would be a great reward for me losing 30 pounds - so I'll make that a goal. She looked at me and said, "But you are still going if you don't lose it right - because I want to miss it if you don't lose the weight."

This wasn't like a huge thing that made me feel bad or anything. It made me realize how many times I've set these goals for myself and how many times I've let myself give up. Her comment made me realize how committed I am to this now, and there is no doubt in my mind that I will reach my goal and stay there.

Just so happy to be past the point that I feel like everyone needs to cheer me on. I can cheer myself on (and my husband and daughter and amazingly supportive!).

Replies

  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member

    Just so happy to be past the point that I feel like everyone needs to cheer me on. I can cheer myself on (and my husband and daughter and amazingly supportive!).

    This^ is what is truly important. Have fun at the concert
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    I'm not sure she meant anything bad about it and may not have even realized how it sounded to you... But good for you for putting a positive spin on it anyway!

    When I announced that I was going to join WW a few years ago, my brother rolled his eyes and said something like "here we go again". At first I was hurt and pissed but I pretty much came around to the same conclusion you did. He was right, I'd announced several times that I was going to start a new diet program and it never panned out. But this time was different!! I knew that but it was hard to express without sounding like the same old weight loss talk.

    I will say though, his comment stuck in my head for about the first year and got me through a few spots where I wasn't sure I could continue on. I had to prove it not only to myself but to him and anyone else who may have had their doubts.

    Here's to 30 pounds by mid October!
  • mrsjones2point0
    mrsjones2point0 Posts: 332 Member
    I was married to that for years, the man who constantly told me I couldn't do it.

    Don't let people like that inside your head. Keep your own voice positive and know you can do it!
  • caseypaige84
    caseypaige84 Posts: 37 Member
    I know how you feel. I told my husband we should go on a trip for our anniversary in March. I said it would be great cause if I stick with this I should be at my goal weight by then. He said well that's a big IF. It sure stung a bit, but I can see where he is coming from. I have stopped and started more times than I can count. But this kinda gave me motivation to prove him wrong. So ya when I hit my goal he is totally paying for a trip.
  • lsmsrbls
    lsmsrbls Posts: 232 Member
    That is a very aggressive goal. I hope you'll go to the concert and have fun whatever you may weigh.

    I'm glad you are happy and feel motivated.
  • Achaila
    Achaila Posts: 264 Member
    My sister recently joined Weight Watchers. After a week and losing 5 pounds, she gave up. She gave up because everyone around her has repeatedly told her she can't do it over the years, and even after a huge success, she now believes it. It makes me so mad. I tried to be her biggest supporter. I still am if she decides to get back into it.

    I really wish people would stop that crap. Of course you can do it. Anyone can. It doesn't matter how many times you've failed in the past, every time you try again its a clean slate. And just by trying again it shows that you want it. Just don't give up and don't listen to anyone who says you can't do it. You can. Even if you don't hit your goals when you want, if you don't give up you will eventually hit them.

    Don't listen to anyone. You can do it. Good luck! :)
  • missemmapeel
    missemmapeel Posts: 69 Member
    Prove your sister wrong, sista!

    You are doing amazingly and I know you can reach your goal if you stick with it.
  • changingmylife85
    changingmylife85 Posts: 38
    It's a good thing you put the positive thinking into this comment. You should get the most encouragement from your family and loved ones. But being told that you can't do this, should hopefully drive you for more!
  • changingmylife85
    changingmylife85 Posts: 38
    Great job!! Sometimes the worst things stick in our heads to get us through the toughest of times. Its obviously worked for you. Ive never had someone tell me I couldn't lose the weight cuz I've never been THIS BIG. But I've been told I couldn't on other things. And guess what?!?! I did! All everyone needs is motivation. POSITIVE motivation! I hope we can all show one another that!
  • PepperWorm
    PepperWorm Posts: 1,206
    I'm confused. Is there a word missing from the quote?

    Is it, "I DON'T want to miss it if you don't lose the weight?" or are you implying that she would rather miss the concert if you don't lose weight?

    How is her not wanting to miss out if you don't lose weight being aggressively unsupportive anyway?

    30 lbs in 2 months may not be attainable. Sorry. Not trying to be rude, but aiming for .5-1.5 lb losses a week are doable and healthier in the long run.
  • changingmylife85
    changingmylife85 Posts: 38
    You are so right. No one should be told that they can't. It's hard. Changing your health for the better is one of the hardest things I'll ever do. And I'll be doing it for the rest of my life, even AFTER I lose the weight.
  • MakingApril
    MakingApril Posts: 178
    If you put your mind to it you can do it! and guess what? When you DO IT *i believe in you* You can prove them wrong :)
    Don't forget to pick out some nice clothes for the show, because you're going to be rocking!!!

    p.s. If you need any support, feel free to add me!
  • cazcarr89
    cazcarr89 Posts: 34
    That's great that you've set it in your head now! If anything it should spur you on to prove her wrong.
    I just need something to click in my head to get my backside back in gear x
  • BreakingUpWithObesity2013
    BreakingUpWithObesity2013 Posts: 276 Member
    You can do it!! =)
  • Wattyz
    Wattyz Posts: 91 Member
    not only are you going to do it, but you're going to get a smoking new outfit for the concert. Have fun, and WTG!
  • AmandaAnne307
    AmandaAnne307 Posts: 113 Member
    That is a very aggressive goal. I hope you'll go to the concert and have fun whatever you may weigh.

    I'm glad you are happy and feel motivated.

    I'm counting the 11 I've already lost - so I'm hoping to be down another 20 by mid-October. And either way, I'm going! :smile:
  • AmandaAnne307
    AmandaAnne307 Posts: 113 Member
    Prove your sister wrong, sista!

    You are doing amazingly and I know you can reach your goal if you stick with it.

    Thank you! This time feels different, and with the support I get here I know I can stick with it!
  • b1essed
    b1essed Posts: 18
    Show 'em
  • AmandaAnne307
    AmandaAnne307 Posts: 113 Member
    I'm confused. Is there a word missing from the quote?

    Is it, "I DON'T want to miss it if you don't lose the weight?" or are you implying that she would rather miss the concert if you don't lose weight?

    How is her not wanting to miss out if you don't lose weight being aggressively unsupportive anyway?

    30 lbs in 2 months may not be attainable. Sorry. Not trying to be rude, but aiming for .5-1.5 lb losses a week are doable and healthier in the long run.

    You're right - I was missing the 'don't'! She wants to go either way - so do I actually. I don't think she was being unsupportive at all, actually I don't think she cares either way. The point was that in the past I would have taken that comment and found a way to quit - this time is different and I'm willing to do the work with people cheering me on or not.

    And yes, 30 pounds in 2 months would be a HUGE goal. I was counting the 11 I already lost - so I have just over two months to lose 19 pounds. And if I don't, I'll still go! I will have worked hard either way!!
  • JessG11
    JessG11 Posts: 345 Member

    Just so happy to be past the point that I feel like everyone needs to cheer me on. I can cheer myself on (and my husband and daughter and amazingly supportive!).

    This^ is what is truly important. Have fun at the concert

    THIS is exactly where I am in my life changes journey. It's been liberating because to me, at least for myself, it means I've taken control of my own life and the changes I want to make in it, not giving that control to others.

    Good for you!!!
  • Amanda_Tate28
    Amanda_Tate28 Posts: 168 Member
    I was talking to my sister the other day and we decided to go to a concert together in mid-October. I said that would be a great reward for me losing 30 pounds - so I'll make that a goal. She looked at me and said, "But you are still going if you don't lose it right - because I want to miss it if you don't lose the weight."

    This wasn't like a huge thing that made me feel bad or anything. It made me realize how many times I've set these goals for myself and how many times I've let myself give up. Her comment made me realize how committed I am to this now, and there is no doubt in my mind that I will reach my goal and stay there.

    Just so happy to be past the point that I feel like everyone needs to cheer me on. I can cheer myself on (and my husband and daughter and amazingly supportive!).

    I am so glad you have that support. My family does not keep healthy foods at home and my bf likes my thick so he is not supporting me either. I hope that I can learn to cheer myself on too!
    You can do it!!
  • corgicake
    corgicake Posts: 846 Member
    The translation of that statement was probably along the lines of this: screw looks, you're my sister and I think you're awesome so don't let whether you hit one weight loss goal keep us from spending time together and remember that you are more than a number on a scale :)
  • AmandaAnne307
    AmandaAnne307 Posts: 113 Member
    The translation of that statement was probably along the lines of this: screw looks, you're my sister and I think you're awesome so don't let whether you hit one weight loss goal keep us from spending time together and remember that you are more than a number on a scale :)

    You are so right, I know she loves me no matter what. I can't really blame them for not getting all excited that I'm starting over (for the 20th time). I just can't wait to see them this winter (we moved out of state in April) so they can really SEE how much I've changed.

    Thanks for all the support!!
  • Rawr1978
    Rawr1978 Posts: 245 Member
    this is my 20ish try at weight loss, and i don't think i've had anyone insinuate i couldn't do it...though they had every right to lol

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