Master Cleanse???

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Replies

  • mustgetmuscles1
    mustgetmuscles1 Posts: 3,346 Member
    Don't mean to derail...but does anyone know a good doctor that will bleed you when you need it?

    The evil humors are building up in my body again and I just can't find a proper doctor anymore.

    Dr. Oz might be up to it.
    Doctor. LOL
    http://youtu.be/Ra5iXI_WCu0
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    why is it called master cleanse? Is there an amateur cleanse too???
  • MercuryBlue
    MercuryBlue Posts: 886 Member
    why is it called master cleanse? Is there an amateur cleanse too???

    That's what you get when you use grade D maple syrup instead. With store-bought lemon juice and dollar store cayenne.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    why is it called master cleanse? Is there an amateur cleanse too???

    That's what you get when you use grade D maple syrup instead. With store-bought lemon juice and dollar store cayenne.

    so its an amateur cleanse if you just do it with ketones?
  • MercuryBlue
    MercuryBlue Posts: 886 Member
    why is it called master cleanse? Is there an amateur cleanse too???

    That's what you get when you use grade D maple syrup instead. With store-bought lemon juice and dollar store cayenne.

    so its an amateur cleanse if you just do it with ketones?

    It's an amateur cleanse if you're not getting paid. Once you get signed, you move up to the pro cleanse. The master cleanse comes next.
  • ashleyisgreat
    ashleyisgreat Posts: 586 Member
    This thread has quickly taken a turn toward AWESOME.
  • FearAnLoathingJ
    FearAnLoathingJ Posts: 337 Member
    I do cleanse but I just use a bar of soap, make sure you wet it first or it's hard to get in.

    This house is very very clean
  • icecreamdreams
    icecreamdreams Posts: 17 Member
    I tried the master cleanse about 3/4 years ago. I'll admit, I was looking for a quick way to shed pounds and I had a lot of will power. I was not able to stand the lemonade mixture (it's disgusting), so I only forced myself to drink a couple glasses during the entire 10 days. I did a couple of salt water flushes, but I mainly just drank water for 10 days.

    The ups: I lost 25 lbs. I was an avid lover (addict) of salt, and no longer felt the need to use it.

    The downs: The weight came back within a few weeks.

    Was it worth it, maybe for the salt consumption. Would I ever do it again or recommend it to anyone else? No.
  • blt0087
    blt0087 Posts: 115
    I did it once in high school and it was awful. Sure..I got used to the drink and lost a few pounds, but I was constantly running to the bathroom (which in itself was a HORRIBLE experience anytime I went. Imagine eating nothing but spicy spicy Mexican food for a week and having to use the restroom 4 to 5 times a day...you get the picture.) I was weak and tired, I constantly had the shakes, and every bit of weight I lost, I gained it back and more in less than a month.

    So no, no, no. I don't recommend it to anyone.
  • herblackwings39
    herblackwings39 Posts: 3,930 Member
    Try leeches. Much better for cleansing the body of evil.
    This is unnecessary sarcasm. The OP was simply asking for advice. Just say "no, its not a good idea". Or don't post. Posts like this make me not even want to use MFP

    How do we really know if sarcasm is necessary or not? Is there a formula or rule or something?

    Sarcasm is my favorite food group!

    Cheese is mine.
  • moderate39
    moderate39 Posts: 2
    Out of irrational desperation, I tried it once--for the full ten days. An herbalist friend led me to believe it would help with allergies. And actually, while I was starving myself, my allergies did seem to go away. But I think it was because my body was shifting its focus to basic survival. All of my joints started hurting--bad! My knees, my hip, my shoulders. I could barely walk after about the fourth day.

    Never again.

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