Frustrated and feeling defeated....advice please

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bnelly55
bnelly55 Posts: 88 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I lost a bunch of weight last year. My ticker doesn't show it all, but I lost around 120 lbs. I've gained about 30 back since last June and I feel so defeated. Losing weight made me feel so much better physically and mentally, but now I feel like a complete failure. I need to get back to my healthy lifestyle and get to my goal weight. I KNOW I can do this because I did it last year, but I'm finding it so hard to stay on track. I seem to eat really well for 2-3 days and then binge. Well that one binge turns into a week of bad eating. It's a vicious cycle. I feel like crap when I put crap in my body, I just can't seem to stop once I get started. Does anyone have any advice who has been in my shoes? How do you stay on track?

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  • BaileyBoo13524
    BaileyBoo13524 Posts: 593 Member
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    You need to take care of the root cause of your binging. Usually when people binge it's to deal with an emotion. When you binge are you sad, depressed, or anxious? I have been a binge eater all my life and will still binge every now and then. Mine is when I am feeling unhappy with myself. If you can get to the root cause of why you binge in the first place and take care of that issue the rest will usually fall into place :) good luck! No one is perfect 100% of the time!
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
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    You lost 120 pounds and gained back 30? That's still losing NINETY POUNDS! That's incredible! I know we freak out when we started gaining after we've been losing, but daaaaamn, look at those 90 pounds as proof that you are totally able to do this.
  • 4theking
    4theking Posts: 1,196 Member
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    To add onto what Bailey said, we sometimes binge for emotional reasons, but many times, binges are a result of hormonal imbalances, food allergies, or deficiencies of vitamins or minerals. That being said, all of the above can result in the emotional state of sadness, depression, and anxiety. So look past the emotions to find the root cause. What I have found in my research and experience...........cortisol, either not enough or too much along with thyroid defeciency, as well as estrogen being out of balance with progesterone, will cause the majority of the problems.
  • MyOwnSunshine
    MyOwnSunshine Posts: 1,312 Member
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    I find that maintenence is as hard, if not harder, than losing weight, because when you're losing, you have a goal to look forward to and it feels more purposeful. When you're maintaining, you know that you have a little room for extra treats and such, and it's easy to get carried away.

    The way that I handle maintenence is to essentially "diet" during the week, and then "cheat/treat" on the weekends. This balances my calories well, and since I'm used to my "losing" calories and behavior, the week is easy for me. If I want to splurge, I remind myself that I can do it on the weekend. Every Monday, I go back to my healthy eating and logging. This works really well for me.

    I also work out like crazy to burn calories, increase my metabolism, increase my lean mass, and keep my focus on providing good fuel for my body. Having fitness goals helps me stay on track and focus on my macros.

    I know that I was, am and always will be a compulsive eater with a tendency to overeat sweets and unhealthy foods. I know that I will need to log my calories and continue to exercise for the rest of my life so I don't regain the weight. I have lost weight so many times, only to gain it all back plus another 20 pounds. This time, I am adamant that I will not regain and I will continue to engage in the behaviors that allowed me to lose my weight for the rest of my life.
  • volume77
    volume77 Posts: 670 Member
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    I know exactly how you feel I was low carb for a year and lost a bunch of weight got way below my goal weight and have gained back about 10. but look at it this way, you have still lost 90:)
  • rezn8
    rezn8 Posts: 263 Member
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    Maintenance is definitely harder, especially if the loss was extremely quick. Be patient, and you can change your metabolism to help deal with it. You also should consider a regular exercise schedule that you can stick to. As you develop better fitness levels you will also burn calories more easily. Remember this is a long term thing not something to hurry up and do and then move on. You'll be happier and healthier in the end.
  • TaraGaynor
    TaraGaynor Posts: 3 Member
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    binge eating is something I too struggle with. I start off my morning thinking, "I'm going to be good today, I'm going to stick to my plan," but on the way home I'll be driving with my kids who won't stop screaming or I'll have a stressful day at work and when I come into my kitchen to make dinner I find myself "picking my cupboards" and spoiling all of my hard work and good intentions. It sucks. I find that on days where work was good and my kids are happy are the days that are easier to stay on track...

    Regardless, curving this habit is something that is difficult because it is like asking to control your emotions. Obviously it is natural to feel sad/happy/angry/frustrated and for some of us, "binging" is just as natural as our feelings.

    At the end of the day I am trying to make my emotions result in something positive in stead of something negative. I have tried to instead of eating when I get home, to promise myself that I will go for a walk after dinner and leave my husband with the kids and dirty dishes. This way I still get a "release" that is not food related, PLUS, I am doing positive exercise. Worst case scenario if I am still feeling like eating a little extra after my walk then I can eat my burned calories without the guilt, and with a clear head and time to really consider if I "need" it or not.

    I hope this helps. Be proud of what you have done so far!!!!!!
  • sdwilliam78
    sdwilliam78 Posts: 1
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    Hello, you are definitely not alone!!!! But I can tell you that you've really already come so far. Im struggling to lose 15lbs at this point. So dont be so hard on yourself. You are still an inspiration to others!!!:happy:
  • fppalmer
    fppalmer Posts: 24 Member
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    +1 on emotions / imbalances creating the binges, you may need to look there and fix things.

    and / or

    How often do you eat?

    Look, as humans, we are genetically engineered to NOT be able to not eat. Those groups of humans that really enjoyed not eating? Well, they didn't eat and died out before they had kids, leaving those of us left genetically engineered to need to eat.


    IF you eat with long periods of time between feedings, you get more hungry, and when you are more hungry, you are genetically programmed to eat a lot. While most of us can't fight this need to eat so we don't starve, we can, often, out think it, and smaller more frequent meals can help.


    TYPICAL of many of us, go to work, eat lunch around noon, work till 5:30 ish, commute home, hang with family make dinner, eat around 7. Lunch at noon, dinner at 7. After 7 hours of famine, we can't control ourselves and feast too much on the wrong things.

    SO? Eat a snack at 2:30, and another between 90 minutes or so before dinner (maybe just before the commute home).

    These small meals will help maintain your blood sugar, and make it so you are not starving at dinner time, which can TOTALLY help you avoid binging and allow you to eat healthier foods for dinner.

    Similar tactics for the "just before bed pig out", if you're starving hungry at 11:30 and find you must pound a substantial snack just before bed .... it could be because you had a small dinner hours and hours ago. Try a snack BEFORE you're binge time, say 10:00. This will help you make more sensible decisions.

    This is just one thing to try.

    GOOD LUCK!

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