Relationship ????'s

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  • mamabear0222
    mamabear0222 Posts: 455 Member
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    I feel that if your husband respected you and your marriage vows then he would end it all.
    This is real life, not reality tv. He can't have feelings for 2 women and it sounds like he wants his cake and eat it too.
    To add to this, he's trying to make you feel guilty about it all. Not good.
    This is exactly why these things go wrong/bad. Someone ends up with feelings, someone likes someone more.
    Someone gets hurt. Like a previous poster said, I see it ending badly as well. It's just an all around bad situation.
  • Soccermavrick
    Soccermavrick Posts: 405 Member
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    Honestly you are not going to be able to be friends. And I think you need to figure out what you want in your marriage. Because I think your husbsnd WANTS the threesome fulltime otherwise he would have left the topic alone a while ago. Sorry but your marriagehas issues. I might think that you need professional help. Good luck. Sorry.
  • tworthen79
    tworthen79 Posts: 1,173 Member
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    First of all you don't bring another into a marriage, but what's done is done.

    Secondly, Get her out of your house, if she truly cares for you both she will move with no hard feelings. Sadly, I don't see a friendship there, because it has gone so far and so many things have happened that can't be taken back. If this bothers your husband, I say he doesn't care for you or your marriage. If he doesn't get mad and agrees she should leave your lives all together, I would then seek counseling. And work through the bumps your marriage will face in the future. Never point fingers and blame one another, since it was both your guys fault. Just start over fresh. And if he has these fantasies, watch porn, buy toys, get kinky with handcuffs, but NEVER invite another into your sex life. So much goes wrong, as you have seen. Not worth it. Good Luck and I hope you all work it out.
  • Dreaaa
    Dreaaa Posts: 319 Member
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    Oh honey.. I'm so sorry you are going through this tough time.
    You got yourselves into a bit of a pickle.
    A threesome works ONLY if the couple doesn't develop emotional feelings towards the third party. 3 people in a relationship is tough work and nearly impossible.
    I would suggest you put your thoughts in order and then talk with both of them. At the same time.
    You deserve to be happy as do they BUT that does not mean that what you feel or think is any less valid.

    Seek professional help. There's going to be trust issues among others that will need to be addressed.

    Best of luck.
  • laystarr
    laystarr Posts: 7 Member
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    In the end it is going to come down to both of you choosing. For you it will be either your husband or the friendship (girlfriend). For your husband it will be either his wife or her (the girlfriend). Your husband is being very selfish, but you allowed him to get this way. Honesty should of been the first policy, but it's too late for that. If I was you I would tell him I want a threesome with a male and watch his reaction. Start actively searching for a male for you to bring into your bed.Pressure him into it as he did you. He will then hopefully look at this situation differently. Be strong and don't allow him to pressure you anymore. Good luck.
  • cosmic8o8
    cosmic8o8 Posts: 131 Member
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    OMGeezy, your marriage is doomed. You're married, you did it more than once to appease him, and he still isn't happy. Not to be mean, but you seem like the kind of person that will let him walk all over you and you'll never leave him. He still wants to dip his wick in a variety of poon while keeping you by his side. I bet if you told him you'd want a three-some with another dude, he'd have a fit.

    If a guy I was dating brought up wanting to do a three-some, I'd make it clear that it wasn't my thing. I wouldn't try to be cool and say that I think it would be fun. I'd also probably dump him because that's a big red flag for me. I sure as crap wouldn't marry him or have his chud children.
  • sabified
    sabified Posts: 1,051 Member
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    I would love to help, but I'm to lazy to read all that. Good luck! :smile:
    Marriage counseling trumps internet strangers any day.


    This

    This as well... though have to say, the fact that he's completely disregarding your feelings and the fact that you were never interested in this is a big red flag.

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