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    How to attract women, fail safe tested method

    Posts: 1,840 Member
    edited February 1 in Chit-Chat
    Ok so yesterday we went to the monkey sanctuary, I inadvertently discovered that the way to get all the monkeys no matter how absorbed they are in what they are doing, how uninterested in life and people in general they may appear, there is a way to make them come to you and ignore all the other people, have a toy monkey with you...total result.

    So men, if you want similar success with women, carry around an inflatable sex doll and you are sure to attract them in their hundreds

    This has been tested on animals so must be true

    I have video evidence

    Any results beyond the initial crowding around you may depend on your own behaviour and I accept no responsibility for any injuries etc as a result of the volume of women, I also suggest you carry a stick for your own protection

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    • Posts: 6,129 Member
      Ok so yesterday we went to the monkey sanctuary, I inadvertently discovered that the way to get all the monkeys no matter how absorbed they are in what they are doing, how uninterested in life and people in general they may appear, there is a way to make them come to you and ignore all the other people, have a toy monkey with you...total result.

      So men, if you want similar success with women, carry around an inflatable sex doll and you are sure to attract them in their hundreds

      This has been tested on animals so must be true

      I have video evidence

      Any results beyond the initial crowding around you may depend on your own behaviour and I accept no responsibility for any injuries etc as a result of the volume of women, I also suggest you carry a stick for your own protection

      a scene from Inflatable Dolls Gone Wild!

      450px-Sex-dolls.jpg
    • Posts: 1,936 Member
      u mirin?

      diapo_sex_dolls9.jpg
    • Posts: 1,893 Member
      u mirin?

      diapo_sex_dolls9.jpg


      Shudder. Way too much creepiness going on there.
    • Posts: 1,389 Member
      I knew I was missing something...
    • Posts: 1,936 Member
      show previous quotes


      Shudder. Way too much creepiness going on there.
      Op it didnt work!:angry:
    • Posts: 1,840 Member
      show previous quotes
      Op it didnt work!:angry:

      try waving them about
    • Posts: 1,389 Member
      They're not approaching, but I am getting women to look at me!
    • Posts: 1,840 Member
      They're not approaching, but I am getting women to look at me!

      persevere, it will work if you wave them about and make the right noises
    • Posts: 1,389 Member
      wait.. there's noises?

      ok... I'll try again...
    • Posts: 1,840 Member
      wait.. there's noises?

      ok... I'll try again...

      yes, obviously

      I make really great ones, my neighbours are often banging on the wall
    • Posts: 1,274 Member
      andrew-mccarthy-mannequin.jpg
    • Posts: 7,512 Member
      u mirin?

      diapo_sex_dolls9.jpg

      I was totally attracted to this guy from some unknown reason, but he broke my heart when he told me all he like was plastic and Asian.
    • Posts: 54 Member
      Men with blow-up dolls are soooooo SEXY! You know what would be even better is if the doll was dressed as a clown. I would just melt...
    • Posts: 1,389 Member
      show previous quotes

      yes, obviously

      I make really great ones, my neighbours are often banging on the wall

      I'm obviously doing it wrong :(
      I need better noises...
    • Posts: 1,133 Member
      You know, I think I'm just going to stick with a big bag of ducks, instead. But thanks for the tip.
    • Posts: 2,332 Member
      wait, wut?

      tumblr_mraf16PxEv1rvkfp6o1_500.jpg
    • Posts: 407 Member
      HAHAHA!
    • Posts: 6,998 Member
      recipe-image-legacy-id--1043451_11.jpg

      This works really well on me.
    • Posts: 1,936 Member
      show previous quotes

      I was totally attracted to this guy from some unknown reason, but he broke my heart when he told me all he like was plastic and Asian.
      Now hang on for a sec. Not all of them are asians, the left one is a latina. He just said that to you so he could reject you before you rejected him. Its a defence mechanism you see, the guy has all the feels.
    • Posts: 2,332 Member
      tumblr_mq8pdxKBQO1snhlk5o1_500.gif
    • Posts: 1,389 Member
      So now I need noises and chocolate?
      Anything else???
    • Posts: 1,840 Member
      So now I need noises and chocolate?
      Anything else???

      Nuts

      oh and a really, really big stick

      I think its stick, hang on while I check
    • Posts: 1,389 Member
      So we're back at the proverbial nuts and stick... lol
    • Posts: 13,049 Member
      You could use one as a nut cracker.

      CFqqwOq.gif
    • Posts: 821 Member
      andrew-mccarthy-mannequin.jpg

      Now that is a great movie.
    • Posts: 1,791 Member
      You could use one as a nut cracker.

      CFqqwOq.gif

      look at the fun bags on that... nut cracker
    • Posts: 1,389 Member
      ^ exactly ^
    • Posts: 319 Member
      show previous quotes

      look at the fun bags on that... nut cracker

      where can I buy one?
      is breast size customizable??
      I need to know!!
    • Posts: 545 Member
      I had a moment with a Gorilla at the zoo. There were tons pf people crowded around watching him through the glass and he singled me out and began staring at me. He walked all the way over to where I was standing and sat right in front of me and just kept staring. It was one of the weirdest things I've ever experienced.
    • Posts: 845 Member
      I had a moment with a Gorilla at the zoo. There were tons pf people crowded around watching him through the glass and he singled me out and began staring at me. He walked all the way over to where I was standing and sat right in front of me and just kept staring. It was one of the weirdest things I've ever experienced.

      Sounds hot. Although I prefer spider monkeys myself.
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